Epilogue

Tank

C larke looked over me worriedly, a frown marring her pretty features. In the last few weeks since I'd been home, she'd been blossoming, coming into herself, and I was a lucky son of a bitch to witness it happen. But with that blossoming came a woman who fretted and worried over me a bit too much.

I wasn't sure she'd ever let go of the fear of me being taken from her again. I knew it'd left a deep scar on her soul, and she still woke up from flashbacks and nightmares, crying and thinking I was gone. Every single time, I wrapped her up in my arms and held her, assuring her I was still there.

It bothered her so much that I wouldn't promise to never sacrifice myself for her again. Beck understood because he'd been there. He knew she was worth the sacrifice. He'd done it himself—put himself in harm's way right in the lion's den in his attempt to save her.

But Clarke didn't understand it, and she refused to even try.

"I don't have to go cook. I can?—"

"Baby," Beck said, his tone soft and soothing, "I've got him. I promise."

I was more than capable of showering on my own now. My balance was finally back to normal, and I was slowly gaining weight back. I worked with a personal trainer four times a week to get my muscle tone back, and Beck and I ran together every morning. Honestly, I was fine. But Clarke was clinging.

We understood it, but we were also trying to get her to let go just a little so she could live freely again.

She sighed. "But?—"

"No buts," I told her, my voice firm but gentle. "If you want to help me, little one, go make me a high-protein meal, okay?"

She pouted, but when I reached out and pulled her to me, slanting my lips across hers, her frustration melted away. Her body melted into mine, a soft moan crawling up her throat. I palmed the back of her head, working my tongue between her lips. Her soft whimper was music to my ears, and my cock hardened.

Reluctantly, I released her and swiped my thumb over her kiss-swollen bottom lip. She shivered, her eyes going a little hazy. "I love you, and I'm okay." Leaning down, I pressed a kiss to her forehead before cupping her cheek. "I'm not going anywhere."

She sighed before nodding and stepping back. She eyed me once more before turning on her heel and leaving our room. I sighed and leaned back against the wall, reaching up to scrub my palms down my face. Beck gripped my hips, tilting his head back a little to look up at me. His hair had been redyed and was now all blonde. I couldn't help it when I reached up to run my fingers through the soft, silky strands.

"She worries too much," I grumbled.

Beck hummed in agreement. "She's always been like that," he told me. "It'll take her a while to adjust. Losing you fucking hurt both of us." I winced. "But it hit her harder. You were her rock, Ash. She leaned on you so heavily. You gave her strength to heal, and then you were ripped away from her. She spiraled fucking hard ."

I leaned my head back against the wall and glared up at the ceiling. "I know, but it was me or you two. And I swore to protect you two. I could handle everything they threw my way. The chances of you and Clarke surviving all that shit again were slim, especially since they knew you were a betrayer. Your death would've been slow and painful, but you would have died."

He shrugged. "I've always been prepared to die for her," Beck quietly reminded me.

Cupping his cheeks, I pressed our foreheads together, looking into his pretty, gray eyes. "Your selflessness is admirable."

He snorted and pressed a quick kiss to my lips. "I'm plenty selfish, Ash. I'm selfish as fuck with you two."

I chuckled and released him so we could head into the bathroom for our shower. Sweat was drying on my skin, and it wouldn't be long before it would begin to irritate my skin. Beck turned the shower on while I stripped out of my clothes, and I groaned when I finally stepped beneath the hot spray of water.

Fuck, it felt good.

Since Clarke was working hard on breakfast for us, Beck and I didn't waste too much time in the shower. We bathed each other, just as we always did, and then we quickly dried off and got dressed before heading downstairs together.

Vern nodded once at us. "River wants us in the chapel once you've got food," he told me.

I sighed. I wanted to eat breakfast with Clarke and Beck, especially since Clarke was in one of her moods today, but if River wanted to hold church, then I needed to get my ass to that table.

"I've got her," Beck assured me, giving my hand a squeeze. "Go ahead and make your coffee. I'll see if she's got your food ready."

I nodded and headed over to the coffee maker, quickly pouring myself a cup of coffee. Clarke came out of the kitchen holding my plate of food. She set it in front of me. "River is an ass," she muttered.

I chuckled and pulled her to me at the same time the man in question emerged from the hall, arching a brow at her. She scowled at him. Adelaide laughed softly and patted River's chest. "You're stealing her man from her during their daily breakfast routine. I'd be salty as fuck, too," she told her husband.

He sighed and headed toward the chapel, calling over his shoulder to Clarke, "I'm not keeping your man long."

She stuck her tongue out at his back, making Vern bark out a laugh before he followed River into the chapel. I pressed a soft kiss to her lips. "Be a good girl for Beck, will you?" I asked her.

She huffed. "I'm always a good girl."

I snorted. "You're being a menace today," I pointed out. "Don't be a brat, little one. We can cuddle later, yeah? Eat your breakfast. Be good."

She pouted but nodded. I kissed her before grabbing my coffee and food, then headed toward the chapel. Gin followed me in, shutting the door behind him before we took our seats at the table. Holden groaned at the sight of my food. "I think I need to find a woman so I can get breakfast every morning, too."

River grunted. "Not every woman is going to want to serve you like Clarke wants to serve Tank," he warned him. "Adelaide sure as fuck does not like serving me."

Holden huffed. I chuckled before digging into my food, groaning at the explosion of flavors on my tongue. Clarke, since learning how to cook from Reina and Adelaide, had become damn good at mixing seasonings perfectly. Beck and I were a little bit addicted to her cooking.

"Bringing you all to the table today because Joey, Alejandro, and I came up with a plan regarding the remaining Bradley family members." I looked over at him. While the main players had been taken out, there were still a couple running around that could easily rebuild everything. They were underground and hiding a little too fucking well. Alejandro couldn't find them, and I knew the Cartel leader's patience was wearing extremely thin.

Sam looked at Vern. "You'll be going underground with Emmanuel," Sam informed him. Vern grunted, looking a bit pensive. I guessed it now made sense why Alejandro wanted Vern here. "Emmanuel is a good guy. Quiet but he gets the job done. He'll be a good partner for you."

"Wasn't good enough to keep Tank from being kidnapped," Gin snapped at Sam, his muscles tensing.

Vern sighed, frowning at Gin. Sam arched a brow at our treasurer. "He was good enough to get Beck and Clarke to safety as Tank requested ," he emphasized. "They were greatly outnumbered, and he managed to make sure Beck and Clarke were safe, got back home, and didn't see a single bit of the carnage. He understands the missions he's given, and he executes them perfectly."

"He's right," I told Gin quietly. "I told him not to save me if it meant Beck and Clarke might not make it."

Gin clenched his jaw. "And you all trust him?" Gin demanded. He looked at me, valuing my opinion. " You trust him to watch Vern's back? He may be from another club, but he's fucking family. None of us want to see what happened to you happen to someone else, Tank."

I nodded once. "I trust him. I would be fighting this if I didn't," I promised him.

Gin sighed before leaning back in his chair, crossing his arms over his chest. He nodded once at River and Sam, not looking happy about it but giving in nonetheless. I clapped a hand to his shoulder before digging back into my breakfast.

"Emmanuel will be here in three days," River informed Vern. Vern nodded once, his face unreadable. "Alejandro will have a plan for you by then, and he'll lay out everything for the two of you."

"How underground am I going?" Vern asked.

"No outside communication until the job is done," River told him.

Vern clenched his jaw, and my hand tightened around the fork I was holding. Vern had become something like a real brother to me since I'd been rescued. We'd grown close since he walked into my hospital room, bringing Clarke and Beck food. And now, my brother was about to go completely radio silent.

"If we need help?" Vern asked.

"Alejandro has informed us he'll have a plan in place for that," Sam told him. "We won't leave you without help, brother. You know that. But these assholes have to be wiped out. You have military training that none of us have—not to your extent." Holden did, but Vern had been a SEAL. He was deadly and could shut his emotions off like a fucking light switch. Holden had been an infantryman, and while that was still deadly as fuck, he didn't have the extra training Vern did.

Vern nodded once before pushing back from the table, agitation suddenly riding every move he made. "We done here?"

River nodded and slammed his gavel on the table. Vern left the room, and a moment later, I heard the clubhouse doors slam. River sighed. "I don't want to send him," River told us. "But he's our only option if we want to do this safely and correctly the first time around. My hands are tied."

"We know," Holden quietly spoke up. "But you're right—he's the best option. And Tank, Clarke, and Beck deserve to have this wiped away. Vern will come around."

I finished off my food before standing from the table. "Let me go talk to him."

Sam and River nodded at me. I headed out of the chapel. Clarke was washing dishes in the kitchen when I stepped in. She looked over at me as she passed Beck a plate to dry. "Is Vern okay?"

I shrugged and handed her my plate. "I don't know, little one. He was just informed he's going underground and radio silent in three days to take out the rest of the Bradley family."

Her eyes filled with worry for him. Fuck, she was such a caretaker. I loved that about her. "Do you think he'll be okay?" she softly asked.

I nodded. "He'll be okay, little one. He was in the military—SEAL. He knows what he's doing. But I know he never wanted to do shit like this again. I'm going to go talk to him, and then we can have cuddles after, okay?"

She nodded. "Okay," she said quietly. "He can join us to watch a movie, if he wants."

I smiled and pressed a kiss to the top of her head. "Alright, little one."

I headed out of the kitchen and went outside. Vern was sitting on the ground, his back leaning against the side of the clubhouse. He had a blunt between his lips. I grunted as I settled beside him, and he passed me the blunt silently so I could take a hit.

"I'd go if I could," I told him quietly.

He shook his head. "Don't be ridiculous, Tank," he muttered. "You're still trying to get all your strength back, and Beck and Clarke need you here . They can't handle you being silent on them again. They were fucking wrecks, even if Beck did his best to wear a mask around all of us." He leaned his head back against the building. "Just didn't want to ever do this shit again. Not sure if my PTSD can handle it." He looked at me. "Doesn't take shit to trigger it all again."

I nodded. "Trust me, I fucking know." I brought my knees up, resting my arms on them, my hands dangling in front of me. "Clarke is worried about you leaving."

He chuckled and shook his head, raising the blunt to his lips again. "Your girl worries too much."

I snorted. "Tell me about it." I bumped his shoulder with mine. "I know you're sort of being forced to go, but I appreciate you doing this," I told him quietly. "It means a fucking lot. Beck and Clarke need this."

He nodded. "I know. Which is why I didn't put up a huge fight. Besides, even if I did, Alejandro will always win." He looked at his watch. "I need to get in to see my therapist. Maybe there's a med I can take while I'm in the field to prevent flashbacks." He drew in a deep breath before slowly releasing it. "Christ, I'm not ready for this shit, brother. Especially with a fucker I don't know."

Emmanuel worked mainly out of Mexico, from what I'd learned. While Alejandro's second in command, Miguel, tended to follow Alejandro closely, Emmanuel was the one that was left in charge when Alejandro was Stateside.

I nodded. "I know. But despite the orders, call me if you need me. I'll keep my burner phone near—always. And I'll always answer."

He smirked at me, though it didn't reach his eyes. "Even if you're balls deep in Beck or Clarke?"

I barked out a laugh, reaching over to lightly shove him. He snickered. "Even then, asshole."

We both looked up when the door opened. Clarke came out carrying a pack of Oreos and a glass of milk. Beck shrugged at me as he walked out the door behind her. She squished herself between me and Vern, getting comfortable. Beck snorted and sat on the other side of me, leaning against my side. I curled my arm around his shoulder, turning my head to softly kiss him.

"I think we should eat cookies instead of getting high," she told Vern.

Vern snorted at her but put out his blunt, nonetheless. She wasn't a huge fan of the smell. "I have a figure to maintain," he teased her.

She shrugged. "I'm sure eating this pack of cookies with me won't make it disappear. You can go workout or run or whatever after if it makes you feel better. But cookies always make me feel better."

He snorted and took the cookie she handed him. When she held out the glass of milk, he dipped it in before biting into it. He nodded as he chewed, considering the cookie. Then, he nudged her shoulder, some of the light re-entering his eyes.

"You know what, kid? You might be on to something here."

She beamed at him. I pressed a kiss to the top of her head while I grabbed Beck's hand in mine. He cuddled into my side, and we just sat there, watching as our woman cheered Vern back up with a pack of cookies and a glass of fucking milk.