Chapter 28

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Connor

W hat the fuck am I doing ?

The din of voices around me faded into nothing more than background noise as I sat in the changing room waiting for my number to be called. I couldn't even remember how I'd gotten here. My brain had shut down after Ivy walked away from me last night, and I'd been running on autopilot ever since.

All I could think about was the sadness in her eyes. All I could hear was her quiet, worried voice pleading with me. She was scared. For me.

She didn't give a shit if I was the best bull rider on the circuit. She didn't care what my name garnered in this world. All she cared about was my well-being. My safety. That was it.

" Is that the only reason you're riding? To stick it to a few miserable people whose opinions shouldn't matter? "

She was the only person to ever ask me why I was still doing this. The only one to care why. And looking back on my reasons now... they weren't good enough. I didn't love riding anymore. Not like I used to. And it wasn't because of Dusty or Amber or that fuckface Vance Grimes. I'd just outgrown it. I was older. I wanted different things. I looked at what Zach had with Rae, and I wanted that more than I wanted some belt buckle.

Reaching beneath the padded vest I was wearing, I pulled out the envelope I still hadn't opened, the one that held my future with Ivy.

When I died, I couldn't take any of that shit with me. But I could damn sure carry Ivy's love with me into the great beyond. I could take the memories of the family we built together. Ivy had been right. Those were the things that mattered. Not the opinions of a few miserable assholes and an arena full of strangers.

So what the fuck was I still doing here?

I shot up from the bench, ready to run the hell out of there, when the kid I'd helped several weeks back stepped in front of me, tugging nervously at his collar.

"Uh, Mr. Bennett."

"Just Connor. No need for the mister stuff."

He nodded, his Adam's apple working on a swallow. "Connor. I just wanted to thank you. You know, for helping me out a few weeks back? That tip you gave me about opening my hips up really helped. I've been sure to do that every ride since, and I think I'm getting better."

I stared at the kid standing in front of me, looking up at me the same way I imagined I'd looked up at Dusty Silver when I was his age. And the most miraculous thing happened in that moment. I realized I enjoyed helping that kid get better more than I actually did riding.

I never stopped to consider I could be some young kid's mentor, that I could pass down my knowledge to help someone else. I could do that. And I'd do it a hell of a lot better than Dusty did, because I wouldn't give a shit about my own reputation.

"I'm happy to help." I clapped him on the shoulder. "You've got real talent. You just need a little direction. If you ever find yourself in Hope Valley, look me up. I'd be happy to help you out some more."

His eyes bugged out like I'd just offered him my championship buckle. "Really? You'd do that?"

I chuckled. "There's no point in bein' the best if there's no real competition, kid. You want to make sure the guys you're goin' up against know their shit. That way, when you beat them, you know you earned it."

"Yeah," he breathed, his excitement growing as he nodded. "Okay! I'll be sure to do that. Hope Valley, you said?"

"Yep. It's where my family is. You're welcome any time. But when you show up, be prepared to work, because I'm not gonna go easy on you."

"You got it, mister—I mean Connor."

I gave him one more pat and started out of the changing room, calling back. "Good luck out there."

"Wait, where are you goin'!"

I beamed at the kid over my shoulder. "You're the first to hear it, but I'm officially retired!" I called back as I picked up the pace. The drive to Hope Valley was three hours. If I broke the speed limit, ran every stop sign and red light, and didn't get pulled over by the cops, I figured I could make it back home in two.

Home .

I was just about at the mouth of the hall when that shit-bag Vance stepped in front of me. I could tell by the cocky smirk on his punchable face he was looking to start some shit. Unfortunately for him, I was done. He wasn't even on my radar anymore.

"Congrats, man. You're officially number one," I said without stopping, calling back. "Not that you'll enjoy it, because you'll still be comparing yourself to me while I'll be too busy enjoyin' my life to even remember your name."

Fuck , that felt good to say.

I stepped out into the sunshine, ready to put on a burst of speed and run my ass all the way back to the parking lot. Knee be damned. I'd take this one last risk, then I'd go to the fucking doctor for Ivy and get it fixed.

Only my plan was delayed when I heard the sweetest, sexiest voice asking, "Can you tell me where I can find Connor Bennett?"

I rounded the corner and saw all that wild rose-gold hair shining in the sun. "Ivy?"

She whipped around, her lips stretching into a smile the moment her eyes landed on me. Then she shocked the hell out of me by taking a running leap and launching herself at me, wrapping her arms around my neck and sealing her lips against mine.

I fisted the hair at the back of her head and took the kiss deeper, drinking from her mouth. When the need for oxygen forced us apart, I rested my forehead against hers and breathed deeply, filling my lungs with lemon and basil to prove that she was really standing before me, wrapped in my arms.

"What are you doing here?"

She smiled up at me, love shining brightly in her eyes. "I came to cheer on my baby daddy."

I rocked back in shock. "What?"

She pulled in a fortifying breath and braced her hands on my chest, staring up at me earnestly as she said, "If this is what you want, I'm here. I have your back. No matter what happens, I'll always be wherever you are. That's what you do for the person you love, right?"

It took everything in me to keep from collapsing down on the dirt at hearing her say she loved me.

I took her mouth in a bruising kiss. "Say it, butterfly. I want to hear you say it."

"I love you, Connor. It's you and me and our little chickpea." She took my hand and pressed it against the tiny bump that had formed there almost overnight. I hadn't thought it was possible for her to get any sexier than she already was. Then I saw her belly swelling with my kid and that breeding kink was fully unlocked.

She didn't know it yet, but I fully intended to keep her pregnant with my babies for as long as I could get away with it.

"Christ, I fuckin' love you so much."

"I love you too," she repeated against my lips. "But..." She pulled back and looked around. "What are you doing out here? Should you be back getting ready?"

My dimples popped as I shook my head. "Nope. You can consider me officially retired. I'm goin' out on top."

Her lips parted on a gasp. "What?"

"I'm done, butterfly. Hal's been talkin' about retiring. Says he's too old to be a ranch foreman and wants to enjoy his last years fishin' and drinkin' beer. I was thinkin' that I'd talk to Zach about taking over for him."

"Consider the job yours."

My head whipped around, and I spotted Zach, Rae, and Lennix hanging on to the top of the fence.

"Thanks, buddy," I said with a laugh.

He shot me a thumbs up. "You got it." Then he waved me on. "Proceed."

Ivy and I shared a laugh as I turned to look back at her. "And I was thinkin' about mentoring some of the younger riders. The kid I helped a few weeks ago has shown some real improvement."

She reached up and cupped my cheeks, tears welling in her eyes. "You would be so good at that."

Hearing her say that meant the world to me. "You think so?"

"I know it. Because I know you. And Connor Bennett, you're a good man."

I reached into my back pocket and pulled the envelope out, holding it up between us.

"Is that . . .?"

"Our future," I answered. "Care to find out what we're havin'?"

She hopped up and down on a squeal and snatched the envelope from my hands, ripping it open like a kid going ham on her presents Christmas morning.

She pulled out the piece of paper inside and twisted so we could read it together. A watery laugh worked its way up her throat.

"We're having a?—"