Chapter 4

Chapter Four

J asper

I'm back in the briefing room, the sterile smell of disinfectant thick in the air. The room is stark, devoid of any personal touches, just white walls and a large screen displaying complex diagrams. I sit among other soldiers, all of us in uniform, all of us silent and attentive. The projector hums softly, the only sound breaking the tense quiet.

The officer stands at the front, his presence commanding. He begins his explanation, his voice carrying an authoritative edge. "Gentlemen, what you're about to hear is classified. This project's goal is to use mind control and psychological manipulation for covert operations."

I glance around, noting the serious, focused expressions on the faces of my comrades. I feel a knot of apprehension tighten in my stomach, but I force myself to listen. This is what I signed up for, isn't it? To serve my country, to be a part of something bigger. Yet, as the officer delves deeper into the details, my curiosity is tinged with unease.

The scribbling of notes fills the room, each soldier diligently recording the information. I jot down key points, but my mind drifts, questioning the morality of such a project. The officer's voice drones on, detailing the techniques and their potential applications. I swallow hard, my mouth dry. This isn't what I envisioned when I joined the military.

The memory fades, and I'm back under the big top, sitting in a secluded corner with Lila. The circus is quiet now, the only light coming from a nearby lantern casting soft shadows on our faces. I can feel her eyes on me, waiting for an explanation. My past has caught up with me, and I need to tell her the truth.

I take a deep breath, hesitating. My eyes are distant, staring at a past I can't escape. "Lila, there's something you need to know," I start, my voice tinged with regret. "I was part of a secret military project."

She leans in closer, her expression a mix of shock and empathy. "What kind of project?"

"A lot of mind control and psychological manipulation techniques," I say, each word heavy with the weight of my past. "They wanted to use it for covert operations. It sounded...necessary at the time."

I can see the conflict in her eyes, the struggle to reconcile this new information with the man she knows.

"How did it go wrong?" she asks, her voice barely a whisper.

Another flashback pulls me into the dimly lit laboratory. Monitors showing brainwave patterns line the walls, the eerie glow casting long shadows. I watch as a fellow soldier undergoes the experiment, his face contorted with pain and fear. The scientists around us seem unfazed, their focus entirely on the data.

The soldier begins to thrash, his screams piercing the sterile air. The beeping of monitors accelerates, a cacophony of chaos. I step forward, shouting at the scientists to stop. "You're hurting him! Stop it!" But they ignore me, their eyes glued to the screens. The memory is vivid, the helplessness I felt, the betrayal.

I snap back to the present, my breathing heavy. Lila's hand reaches out, a gentle touch grounding me. "I left the project after that," I confess, my voice raw. "I couldn't be a part of it anymore."

She squeezes my hand, her eyes filled with understanding. "You think someone's using those same techniques here, on the Misfit Cabaret?"

I nod, the gravity of our situation sinking in. "I'm worried it's someone from my past. Someone who knows exactly how to cause the most damage."

We sit there in the quiet of the night, the weight of my revelation hanging between us. I can see the determination in Lila's eyes, matching my own resolve. We're in this together now, and we'll fight whatever darkness comes our way.

The air between us crackles with tension as Lila and I stand under the big top. My posture is rigid, my shoulders squared as if bracing against the weight of my past. I see the confusion and concern in her eyes, and it only deepens my resolve to tell her everything. The secrets I've held onto for too long now threaten to destroy everything we've built here at the circus. I've never revealed any of this to another person, but the longer I carry the shame, the more it grows out of my control.

"I left the project because it went too far," I start, my voice low and raw. "What they were doing... it wasn't just unethical. It was monstrous." My gaze drops to the ground, memories of the twisted experiments playing in my mind like a bad movie. Things that belong in a torture scene in a military movie–not real life.

Lila reaches out, her fingers brushing against my arm, grounding me. Her touch is a lifeline, pulling me back from the edge of my own darkness. "Jasper," she says softly, her voice a balm to my frayed nerves. "Tell me everything."

I take a deep breath, meeting her eyes. "At first, it was about defense, about finding ways to protect our own. But then it turned into something else. They started pushing boundaries, hurting people, breaking them."

Her eyes widen, but she doesn't flinch away. Instead, she steps closer, her presence a steadying force. "And now you think someone from that project is targeting the circus?"

I nod, my jaw tightening with anger and fear. "Yes. The accidents, the sabotage—it mirrors the techniques we used. Someone wants to bring down the circus, and they know exactly how to do it discreetly. It's too precise to be a coincidence."

We piece together the clues, the pattern becoming clearer with each connection we make. My expression hardens with determination. "We need to find them and stop them before they hurt anyone else."

Lila's eyes meet mine, filled with a fierce resolve. "We will. We'll protect the circus and everyone in it."

We step outside, the night air cool and refreshing against my heated skin. The colorful tents are illuminated by the moonlight, casting an almost magical glow over the circus grounds. It's a stark contrast to the serious conversation we're having, but it strengthens my resolve. This place, these people—they're worth fighting for. They're the only family I have left.

"Here's the plan," I say, outlining the steps we need to take to protect the circus and expose the saboteur. "We'll increase security, monitor everyone closely, and set traps to catch whoever is behind this."

Lila nods, her confidence in me unshaken. "We've got this, Jasper. I know you'll keep us safe."

Her words are a balm to my soul, and I feel a deepening connection between us, both personally and professionally. The stakes are high, but knowing Lila is by my side makes it all seem possible. Watching her for all of those months knit her in my soul–every swing and catch of her performance is emblazoned in my mind. The dips and curves of her strong body are intoxicating to watch. I feel like I know every inch of her, even though we haven't spent much time together before now.

As we stand there, side by side, the night sounds of the circus around us, I feel a sense of calm wash over me. "We'll catch them," I say, my voice filled with determination. "Together."

Lila squeezes my hand, her touch warm and reassuring. In that moment, under the moonlit sky, I realize just how much she means to me. The fight ahead won't be easy, but with Lila by my side, I know we'll overcome whatever comes our way.