24. Gray

The first time I met Serena, I thought she was the most beautiful woman I had ever laid eyes on. I knew she came from a family of witches, the Belladonnas. They were infamous in the supernatural community and extremely powerful.

I had met a few during my lifetime, each one thinking they were more important than the last. We had never met a Belladonna we liked, it was more that we tolerated them at this point, but Serena was different. She and her sister Katarina were either switched out at birth or they were dropped at birth.

They were most likely dropped because Serena looked exactly like her family and even though Katarina had violet eyes, she looked a lot like her sisters too. They acted completely differently than their family, but they still had to maintain a certain facade in public, that was until Serena started dating Ryder.

That was like a double-edged sword. I wanted to be happy for my best friend, but I also wanted Serena to be mine. She was smart, funny, had a sharp tongue and she had this innate ability to make any situation better, no matter how bad it was. She was a perfect addition to our band of thievery and while she couldn't always be with us, her alchemy was almost unmatched, making her valuable to us in more ways than one.

Soren would never admit it, but I knew the more time she spent with us, the more he loved her just like I had. It was wrong to have feelings for her, but I couldn't help it. She was everything until I realized I was pining for my best friend"s girl, and I was probably the worst person in the world for doing it.

It had been a blessing and a curse when she broke it off with Ryder. A blessing that I was no longer jealous of my best friend, but a curse that I no longer got to see Serena anymore. It felt like she had broken up with us too, and in a weird way, we all mourned together by throwing ourselves into our work.

We were doing great until Serena called and asked for our help and it seemed we were all back at square one. Seeing her again was like a kick in the balls, it hurt enough to bring me to my knees, and it was like phantom pain each time I saw her.

She was gone and that pain returned tenfold.

Now I knew why Ryder looked like shit, he told us everything that had happened while he had been gone, detailing her funeral. I grew angry that I was robbed of the opportunity to say goodbye to her or even be able to save her after what Ryder had just confessed to us.

She knew she was going to die and did nothing to save herself.

After his confession we all sat down underneath a tree in silence when I felt a familiar gaze. Oria was looking out a window down at us. It looked like she might be in her workspace, but I could feel her apprehension. My heart didn't know what to feel, it almost felt wrong to go to her when the woman I loved—thought I loved?—for the past several years, had just died.

Ryder noticed her looking at us, immediately growling.

"She's your mate and you know it," Soren stated.

Ryder growled again.

"You heard her say we'd share our mate." Soren sighed. "I know you can't think of letting her in, but she was made for you. She is the moon and stars, the fucking air we breathe and hearth we come home to on a cold fucking day."

Hearing Soren speak so reverently of her made me feel like an ass for not going to her earlier.

Ryder snarled before walking away from us.

"He might never accept her," Soren broke the silence.

"How did you know she was his?"

"When we went to go see Addie, she told us our mate would need a vial that held a luminous liquid," he said, running his hand through his hair. "At first, I thought Serena was our mate, but it seemed she was talking about a whole other woman."

"Did you know she was my mate?" I asked.

"No, but I've always suspected we would share a mate," he said, standing up. "This time I prayed to every god I could think of that we could share a mate."

"The gods probably knew we wouldn't survive without each other," I said, looking up at Soren who was still looking up at the tower from where we saw Sunshine.

"I always felt like we were two halves of a whole person, it would only make sense that we stayed together to love the same women." He looked at me. "Where you are softer, I'm a little harder. When you are calm, I'm a little chaotic. We kind of make the perfect person."

I had never looked at us that way, but while we were opposites, we did round each other out. As a group, we leveled each other out and that's why we worked so well together. It"s why we were so successful, and why we continued to have clients lining up to use our services.

"If he doesn't accept her, what does that mean for us?" I think I knew the answer, but I didn't know if I could be wrong.

"I don't know, but I know that I won't give her up for him," he said, with a conviction I had never heard from him before. "I love Ryder like a brother. Without him, we would have been stuck with a family that wasn't fair to you. In all fairness, I won't give up my shot to feeling complete because he thinks he needs to stay loyal to Serena."

I was conflicted. Everything to Soren had always been so black and white, but with me, I always saw the gray in everything. I guess maybe that"s why my name was so fitting. I lived in a world of gray, but Soren was right. Sunshine was nonnegotiable. She was the color in my life I desperately needed to live. I was tired of living in three colors. Oria was the color of sunrises and sunsets because every day would start with her and end with her and I would have it no other way.

"What should we plan for?"

"That he goes and does his own thing while we live with our mate," he said, matter-of-factly.

"Would it be that easy for you?" We had spent the better part of our lives together and now we were expected to just walk away from him.

"Do you honestly think he would stick around with her being around?"

"We stuck around with Serena," I countered.

He stayed quiet when I expected him to deny his feelings for Serena.

"This is different, the pull will be different, and if he's around her more, the bond is going to be impossible to ignore," he explained.

I smiled as a plan started forming in my head.

"Then we don't give him a chance to leave," I said.

Soren laughed. "I was just thinking the same thing brother."

We sat in silence again before he sighed.

"I did love her," Soren whispered. "I loved her even though I knew my best friend loved her. Now that I think about it, though, I don't know if I ever truly loved her like she deserved."

"No, I guess we couldn't love her like we should have," I said standing up. "It doesn't hurt less though, and I hate that she knew this was going to happen to her."

"Something weird is going on with that spell and those wolves," Soren said, looking at the tower again. "I feel like her mother is tied to it too."

"Come on, we"ve spent enough time away from her," I said, pushing him with my shoulder. "Maybe she can ease our sadness with her sunshine."

"I need her sunshine like I need air to breathe and the blood that keeps me alive," Soren said as we walked to the door of the tower.

I grinned at my twin. "I like to see you soft like this."

"I'm not fucking soft," He shoved me before he opened the door.

I chuckled.

"Whatever you say, brother," I teased, as we walked up the stairs hearing loud stomping.

Ryder was coming down the stairs quickly, looking even more angry. He also smelled like Sunshine which instantly made me nervous.

"What happened?" Soren snapped, getting in Ryder"s way.

His eyes flashed yellow.

"I thought I could come inside, but I was wrong," he snarled. "I can smell her everywhere."

He was shaking like he was losing control again.

"It's ok to want her, Ryder," I said softly, really hoping he didn't wolf out on us.

"I just lost the love of my life, I don't need this shit," he growled through gritted teeth.

"Ryder," I said, putting a hand on his shoulder.

"I thought maybe it was fate that brought us back together." He looked up. "That this was our chance to be together; I thought I had fucking time. This is all fucked up because of her."

He looked back up the stairs and I had to tell myself that it was his grief talking.

"No, it"s no one"s fault except the Belladonnas for putting that stupid spell on those wolves and involving generations of people who had nothing to do with their feud," Soren said angrily. "You need to be mad at the right people because we wouldn't be here if we didn't have to help Serena and in turn, Serena wouldn't be dead."

Ryder didn't respond, pushing past us and stomping down the stairs.

My gut twisted, feeling like this was the beginning of the end as partners and friends. It hurt to think that this might tear us apart.

"He just needs time," Soren said. "Once his grief isn't so dominant, I'm really hoping he comes back to us."

God, this would be the best-case scenario, but I wasn't going to hold my breath.

Soren and I went upstairs stopping by the workshop to see if she was still there. The room was overwhelmingly saturated in the scent of Oria. The place was clean, but the jugs that used to be lined up along the wall were gone and it looked like she had made more vials.

My heart sank that she was still making the vials to be sold. Did she think that she still needed to do it? I thought she was leaving with us? Anger burned through me, but I took a deep breath trying to calm myself down. We needed to talk.

"I hope this doesn't mean she's staying," Soren said, his brows furrowed. "How did everything go haywire in twenty-four hours?"

"We need to go talk to her," I said, realizing we hadn't talked to her about Ryder"s arrival.

"Yeah, we need to make sure she realizes she is ours no matter if Ryder is involved or not." Soren left the room, and I knew he was headed towards her bedroom.

I followed him, my nerves making each step feel heavier and heavier with the weight of what could happen. Could we be over even before we had really even started?

When we didn't find her in the common area, Soren raced up the stairs to her room, but I followed my instincts. If she had been making the vials, then she was probably hungry. I opened the fridge looking for something easy to make for her. I took out stuff for a chicken wrap, added an apple and made her tea.

I walked up the steps to see Soren outside of her closed door leaning against the door frame. He looked at me with tears in his eyes when I stepped on the last step, his face full of anguish. A small whimper caught my attention, and I was hit with extreme sadness that felt so strong, tears threatened to escape.

Soren and I looked at each other in anguish, hating that our mate was feeling like this. I gave him a nod and he knocked, giving her a few seconds to say something when he walked in, and I followed.

Her soft cries stabbed me through the heart. Each cry ripped me to shreds and by the time I made it to her bed, I left the tray on the bench at the end of the bed, rushing to her. Soren picked her up, his face was guarded like he was waiting on her to say something, but she wrapped her arms around him crying even harder.

"Sunshine." My voice cracked as I wrapped myself around her from behind.

I leaned away, quickly smelling the shirt and realized it was someone else's. The growl that escaped me was out of my control as possessiveness unfurled in me. I took my shirt off when Soren pushed her away, taking off her shirt as she looked confused. Her mouth opened, but I yanked my shirt over her head helping her put it on. Soren hauled her against him. and I hugged her again.

"You never wear another man"s clothing. I don't care if you"re mad or you think you hate us," I growled. "You are ours and I would rather you be naked than smell like another man. Do I make myself clear?"

Sunshine shivered.

"Blondie, say you understand." Soren looked down at her. "I know this day has been weird for all of us, but don't doubt you are our mate, our life and our home."

"You left me alone all day, what was I supposed to think?" she muttered against Soren.

"You can always come to us," I said, trying to calm myself. "I know we didn't do well in keeping you informed and that is on us, but if you have a problem with us, you make us listen."

I wanted to threaten her with spanking her, but I knew a part of this was my fault too.

"He said I will never be her and he'll never be mine," she said, her voice cracking.

Fucking Ryder.

Soren and I shared another look. I opened my mouth to start explaining, but Soren started talking.

"When we met Serena, we were all smitten with her. But Ryder and her, they clicked so well. The Belladonnas are usually auctioned off for marriage and never allowed to date, except…" Soren paused and I knew he was trying to make sense of things. "They let her date Ryder and after that, they were inseparable. Actually, we were all inseparable. She came along with us on some jobs, she stayed over at our home and soon, we all grew to have feelings for her."

Sunshine's heart rate spiked at his admission. While I didn't want to tell her we loved her, she deserved the truth.

"I don't think any of us realized she was going to be important to all of us, but while Ryder got to love her in plain sight, Gray and I had to love her from afar. Until she broke it off and left us all in ruins."

Soren cleared his throat, but when he didn't continue, I knew he was still working on his heartache. Soren and I tended to suffer in silence which never did any of us any good.

"We hadn't heard from her in a year, when she came back asking for help." I started where Soren had left off. "She needed a vial of Oria for her sister and since the market had run dry, she needed our help to find some or find the source. We were more guarded than Ryder, but Ryder was convinced she was his mate. Unfortunately, her fate had already been written. She was going to die and even though she told Ryder, he thought he could save her."

"When did she die?" she murmured.

"When I arrived here, she had already died," Soren said, as I felt a rush of sadness from her.

"Did you love her?" Her body tensed when she asked.

"I thought I did," I said slowly. "I don't think I knew what love was or could be until I met you, Sunshine," I said, kissing her shoulder, licking my lips to taste her.

"I thought so too, but I don't think I knew what love was either," Soren said, kissing her forehead. "It definitely didn't feel like this, Blondie. Nothing will ever come close to the way I feel about you. You are my everything."

The tension bled from her as I let go of her to lie down. Soren laid her down in between us and we wrapped our arms around her.

"I know we didn"t communicate well earlier. Ryder coming back, and the news he brought, threw everything off, but don't ever doubt that you are our light, Sunshine," I said, kissing her shoulder again. "You have shined color into our black and white world. I can't go back to dull and colorless life now that I know what my world looks like with you in it."