5. Alex

CHAPTER 5

Alex

W e're finally on our way. I said good-bye to the girls and then made sure to pack the new outfit that I was gifted by Koehn. He gave all of us a new outfit to celebrate his new love.

It was sweet but it kinda made my heart ache knowing that he would probably be the only male who will never show any interest in me. The men at the school would watch me and I could tell that they were interested but for some reason they didn't want to cross Varnak. I'm not really sure why.

Although Lacey told me with her customary smirk that the reason was that I'm Varnak's fated mate. Which is not even remotely possible. There is no way that I'm his mate. He can barely tolerate being anywhere near me. I may not know much about these guys but I do know how Koehn acts with Lacey. He is never anything but focused on making her happy and taking care of her. He would never say the things that Varnak says to me.

And he sure as hell wouldn't do his level best to avoid her.

Now I'm stuck in this little ship with him and it feels so weird to be alone with him.

"Buckle in, vistu."

I glare at him. "Oh, we're still doing that."

He grins and his sea-blue eyes sparkle with laughter. "If it still fits, why would I not?"

I buckle in and mutter under my breath, "It sounds like you've been trying to learn Earth phrases again."

He powers up the ship and smirks. His big hands on the controls make my mouth go dry and a tingle starts in my belly. "I am fascinated by the way Earth minds work. You think that you are so much advanced and yet you don't think that there could be other sentient beings out there who match or could beat your intellect. That seems like it's an oxymoron, as you would say."

I grimace. "I have never used that word."

He throws his head back and laughs, his silver hair down for once. It flies around his face and my mind wanders, considering how soft it might be. Wondering how good it would feel against my skin. Would it be cool and silky?

"Is it because you don't know the definition of the word?"

I glare at him. So much for feeling closer to him and feeling….something for him. Now I just wonder how hard I could hit him.

His crystal eyes slew towards me. His grin makes my heart skip a beat, even though I don't want it to.

"I know what you're thinking." He throttles up the ship and with a flash of light, we zoom right out of the docking bay and my stomach floats up into my throat, my eyes closing and my body feeling oddly weightless as we take off.

I shake and sit back in the seat, my hands clenching on the soft, padded arm of the seat.

The ship levels off after a few minutes and something warm and rough touches my hand. My eyes fly open and he's squatting in front of me and I don't know how he got there but I can't look away from the soft look in his eyes.

"Are you alright, my vistu?"

I nod my head slightly, still trying to figure out what's going on. My hands shake as I lift them up and touch my face, my mouth so damn dry that I can't even force a swallow.

"Hey, Alex. It's alright. Have you gone to the…". He struggles to grasp a word and then sighs, "the counselor? Is that the right word?"

I nod my head but I feel like nothing around me makes any sense. There's a buzzing in my ears that I can't seem to push out. I cannot seem to focus and it feels like my body is not my own.

"And did you actually talk to them or did you just stare at the screen and wait until time was up?" His lips quirk a little and I struggle with a grin.

"You think you know me so well, Varnak."

He leans back and his hand drops from mine and I find that I fucking miss his touch so much. I don't know what's going on but I don't like it.

I don't like it at all.

"I know you like I know myself and we are much alike, little vistu."

"How do you figure?" I push up to standing after I disconnect from the belt. I put my hands on my hips and growl at him.

"You don't like admitting that you are wrong. You fight anything, even if it's good for you. You can't give in to anything because you refuse to admit that you need someone. Should I go on?"

"Absolutely not. You are wrong. We're nothing alike."

He snorts and backs away. "Fool yourself, little one but you can't fool me. You are afraid right now and I would say that it's because of being back on a ship. It frightens you because the last time you were on, you weren't in control. You couldn't take care of your friends or yourself and someone else was calling the shots. You had so much being taken away from you and you were scared. And you fucking hated it. Which is why you hate being on this ship. And yet you signed up for this trip knowing that it would almost kill you to do it. You're an amazing female and I don't deserve to even be near you."

He stalks off while I'm still trying to process everything that he's saying. His back is stiff and he avoids looking at me.

I sit back down and it doesn't feel the same. My heart isn't pounding. I'm not dying of thirst. I feel…calm. Safe.

Because of Varnak.

"Thank you," I whisper.

He grumbles, "don't thank me for recognizing your worth, female. Nobody should ever doubt it."

And that's the last thing we say for a long time. Until I start to doze off in the chair. My chin slides off my hand once again and he turns to me, his blue eyes like lasers. "Why don't you go lie down, vistu? There's nothing you can do right now."

I don't bother fighting him. I'm exhausted. I stand and pad back to the one sleeping pod. Apparently we can't both sleep at the same time unless we're cuddling and that's not happening. Even though my skin tingles when I think about lying next to him.

"Help me," I whisper to myself as my eyes close and I finally drift off to the most peaceful sleep that I've had since I was taken.

"Oof!" I groan as something shifts violently and I find myself falling what feels forever until I thud into something hard.

I shake my head and groan, sitting up and rubbing my shoulder which is throbbing like a motherfucker.

Lights are going off all around me, the glaring white and red merging into a horror show of epic proportions. A blaring whoowhoo sound like a siren on a fire truck is blaring and I honestly don't know how the hell I was sleeping through all this until I was thrown.

I stagger to my feet, holding onto my shoulder as I bump into the wall and put my palm on the panel. The door whooshes open and if possible, it gets even louder. I put my hands over my ears and stumble down the short hall to the control room.

"What the hell, Varnak? What is that noise? What's going on?" I fall into the seat and groan.

His eyes are grim, his jaw clenched so tight I'm surprised he can speak at all. "Get buckled. We've had a malfunction."

My heart drops all the way to my feet. "What does that mean? Malfunction sounds bad."

His eye turn towards me and he grunts, "It is. Get buckled."

I fumble with the buckle as he struggles with the controls and seems completely baffled. Nothing seems to stop the noise. And the sirens are even louder and more annoying.

He glances at me and fumbles with his own belt. "We need to brace for impact."

When I glance out the front view I suck in a sharp breath as the brown and green and blue planet in front of us hurtles at us. "Oh, shit!"

I grab my belt and click it in place quickly. "Where are we?"

"I think it's a planet called Merca 7. We've got minimal information about it. I can see that it's got oxygen so we should be alright as far as that goes but I don't have any other information."

My head reels when I see the planet coming closer. The ship starts to shake and rattle as we hit the atmosphere and begin to burn on re-entry.

I close my eyes and grip the arms of the chair like my life depends on it. Because it just might.

Minutes pass and then I hear Varnak yell, "Brace, vistu, brace!"

My body's thrown to the back and then jerked forward as the ship slams into the ground and goes airborne again, my stomach sinking and jumping with each bounce. Over and over until we finally land and everything around me goes silent.

"Are you alright, vistu?" His voice cracks and he growls under his breath. "Gods vrecking let go of me!"

I open my eyes and see him wrestling with the seatbelt and then pulling out a huge blade and slicing it wildly.

I giggle and his head comes up quickly, his silvery hair flying around his head and his eyes wild with emotion.

"I didn't know you cared so much, Varnak." My voice cracks and it feels like my ribs ache when I groan and attempt to move. "What the hell happened?"

He sighs and sits up straight as he stares at me. "I don't know. I'll have to check the data banks and see if they can tell me what the vreck just went on. It didn't seem like anything was wrong and then all the alarms went off."

I nod my head and it feels like it's going to explode. I groan and hold my head with my hands. "Dammit, that hurts."

He crawls over to me and his eyes study every single inch of me and that fire that barely stays banked around him picks up and smolders recklessly in my body.

"What hurts, vistu?"

"I don't know. My chest and ribs hurt."

"Okay. Just relax for a minute and let your body settle down. We've had some massive changes and I need to double-check some readings, which I'm not entirely sure are good readings."

I lift my head and point out the front of the ship where it has cracked in two.

"I think we've got bigger problems than your readings, Varnak. Look at that."