38. Chapter 38

Chapter 38

E velyn stirred in her bed, her dreams a tumultuous mix of memories and fears. The weight of her decision pressed upon her even in sleep, and she found herself awake before the first light of dawn crept over the horizon.

With a weary sigh, she rose and slipped on a simple morning dress. Her fingers traced the familiar pattern of her braid, still intact from the night before. For once, she left it as it was, hanging over her shoulder in a cascade of chestnut waves and only tucked a few errant locks behind her ear.

The house was silent as she made her way downstairs, her footsteps muffled by the plush carpets. She paused at the bottom of the stairs, listening intently for any sign of movement. The house was still slumbering, with not even the kitchen maids and hall boys awake yet, so she continued on, her heart pounding with each step.

The kitchen was dark and cool, the hearth long since gone cold. Evelyn fumbled with the latch on the back door, her hands trembling slightly. As it swung open, she was greeted by the soft summer breeze, a sharp contrast to the stuffy warmth of the house.

She stepped out onto the flagstones, breathing deeply in the fresh air. The garden stretched out before her, shrouded in mist and shadow. Evelyn hesitated for a moment, glancing back at the house. It loomed behind her, dark and imposing, holding within it all the complications of her new life.

Taking a deep breath, she stepped forward into the misty garden, leaving the safety of the house behind. The dew-soaked grass dampened the hem of her dress as she walked, but she paid it no mind. Her thoughts were focused solely on what lay ahead, on the decision she had to make.

Evelyn wrapped her arms around herself as she set off across the grounds, her mind whirling with the possibilities laid out before her. The morning air held the first cool kiss of autumn, but she barely noticed, lost in her internal struggle.

As she crested a small hill, she found herself at the edge of one of the estate's sprawling fields. The first rays of sun were slanting across the horizon, making the low mist glow golden, revealing the lush green expanse before her. Evelyn's breath faltered for a moment as she spotted a lone figure in the distance.

It was the Baron, already out and working despite the early hour. He wore only his breeches and boots, with a loose shirt open at the neck, revealing a glimpse of his broad chest. His sleeves were rolled up, exposing muscular forearms as he swung a scythe in a steady rhythm, cutting through the tall grass with determined focus. His face was set, his mouth in a tight line.

Evelyn's first instinct was to turn and flee, to avoid this unexpected encounter. But as she began to pivot away, she found herself unable to tear her gaze from him. It wasn't just the novelty of seeing a nobleman engaged in manual labour.

The Baron's movements were graceful yet powerful, each swing of the scythe precise and controlled. Sweat glistened on his brow, and his dark hair fell across his forehead, unkempt in a way she'd never seen before.

Her heart raced as she watched him, feeling as though she were witnessing something intensely private. Yet she couldn't look away. There was something raw and honest about seeing him like this, stripped of the formal attire and stern demeanour he usually presented to the world.

Evelyn hesitated, her feet rooted to the spot. Then, taking a deep breath, she made her decision. This chance meeting felt like a sign, an opportunity she couldn't ignore. With trembling legs, she began to approach the Baron, her mind racing to find the right words to say.

Evelyn's heart thundered in her chest as she approached the Baron. The swish of her skirts against the damp grass seemed impossibly loud in the still morning air. She watched as the Baron's rhythmic movements slowed, then stopped entirely as he became aware of her presence.

He turned to face her, his expression unreadable. Sweat glistened on his brow, and his chest rose and fell with each deep breath. For a moment, they simply stared at each other, the weight of unspoken words hanging heavy between them.

Evelyn swallowed hard, steeling herself. This was her chance, perhaps her only chance, to lay bare the truth of her past. Without preamble, she began to speak, her voice barely above a whisper.

"My lord, I... I was married once before," she said, the words tumbling out in a rush. "To a man named Banfield. Judge Banfield."

The Baron's eyes widened slightly, but he remained silent, allowing her to continue.

"It was—my life before I was married was not a particularly happy one. I lived in a cage, a beautifully gilded one, but one all the same. My life was decided for me. I played the part of a dutiful daughter," Evelyn explained, her gaze dropping to the ground. "My one moment of rebellion was to choose to marry the Judge. I'd heard rumours about him, the whispers of the ton, but I thought...I thought I could thaw his heart. He was wealthy and powerful, and... That doesn't matter."

She trailed off, memories of those dark days flooding back. When she looked up again, she saw something in the Baron's eyes that gave her the courage to continue.

"He was cruel, my lord. Controlling and... violent." Reflexively, Evelyn pulled at the sleeves of her dress, a habit from years of covering bruises. "A... A friend helped me escape."

Evelyn straightened at that. "No—I will not give you anything less than perfect honesty." Fixing the Baron with an unflinching gaze, Evelyn continued. "My lover helped me to escape. He was a good man, and I am grateful to him. Don't mistake me, it was not a love affair—it was... I don't know what it was, but I was not and am not in love with him, not really. It was thanks to him and his friends and family that I escaped."

Evelyn took a deep breath and wrapped her arms tighter about herself to stop the trembling that she didn't even know had started. "In the end, we exposed the Judge for crimes of bribery and blackmail, and I'm sure a litany of others. I was sent away from London to Richard's Aunt Agnes to be kept from the worst of it. He's a vengeful man," Evelyn explained quietly.

The Baron's eyes hardened at that. Evelyn was lost in her own narrative and realised with a start that the Baron had gone rigid all over, his eyes hardening into flinty points.

"I don't know what became of him after that. I don't even know if I'm truly free of him," she said. Evelyn's voice wavered, but she pressed on, determined to reveal everything.

"I took my aunt's name, became Miss Evelyn Bane. I thought I could leave my past behind, start anew. But I see now that I was wrong to keep this from you. You deserved to know the truth from the beginning. It wasn't to deceive you," Evelyn added hurriedly.

"I just...I just didn't want to be Lady Evelyn anymore. I just wanted to be free, and—and I was so ashamed."

Evelyn's words hung in the air, the silence stretching between them like a chasm. She watched the Baron's face, her heart pounding as she searched for any sign of understanding or forgiveness. But his expression darkened, the scars on his face twisting into a grimace that sent a chill down her spine.

The Baron turned away, his gaze fixed on some distant point beyond the misty fields. Evelyn felt a wave of fear wash over her, dreading his judgement. Yet, beneath that fear, a curious lightness bloomed in her chest. For the first time in months, perhaps years, she felt unburdened by the weight of her secrets.

"My lord," Evelyn ventured, her voice barely above a whisper. "Please, say something."

The Baron remained silent, his jaw clenched tight. Evelyn took a tentative step forward, longing to bridge the gap between them.

"I understand if you're angry," she said. "I can leave, whenever you want. I'd understand, I—"

"Lady Evelyn," the Baron interrupted, his voice low and controlled. He still wouldn't meet her gaze. "I would like time to consider what you've told me. As you requested of me."

Evelyn's words died in her throat. She nodded, even though he couldn't see the gesture. "Of course," she murmured. "I understand."

As she turned to leave, Evelyn felt caught between two powerful emotions. Misery at the thought of losing the Baron's trust and affection warred with the profound relief of finally being honest. She walked away, leaving the Baron alone in the field, her heart heavy yet somehow freer than it had been in years.