1. Marie

ONE

MARIE

The air in my father’s study felt thick with tension as we sat across from each other, his brows furrowed in deep concern and mine knitted in frustration. It was one of those conversations I dreaded, the kind that never seemed to end well. We’d had variations of it countless times, but this one was different. It was going to have to be.

Truth be told, I needed it to be.

“Dad, I’ve been thinking,” I began hesitantly, my gaze fixed on the wooden desk between us. “I want to go away to college. I know this is something that we have talked about before, but I really mean it this time. I want to explore my photography somewhere else and maybe to study business as well, to see what I can do with my work.”

His silence was suffocating, and I knew that I had just unleashed a storm. My father, Reverend Mike Oldfield, was a good man, well-meaning and kind, but he could also be overbearing, especially when it came to me. His protective instincts were a force to be reckoned with.

That was why I hadn’t left Wolf Mountain already. There were many times I wanted to, but I couldn’t because of the backlash. But I was twenty-four years old now, and it was definitely time to spread my wings and fly. I just wished my father could see that.

But instead, he leaned forward, his fingers steepled under his chin, and his piercing blue eyes locked onto mine. “Marie,” he began, his voice calm but laced with an undeniable firmness, “you know how I feel about this. This town is where you belong. You’re needed here. You can’t just go off to college and leave everything behind.”

I let out an exasperated sigh, pushing a strand of platinum-blonde hair behind my ear. “Dad, I’m not a child anymore. I’m in my twenties. I need to experience life beyond these mountains, beyond this town. I need to see what I can offer the world, what I can do.”

He leaned back in his chair, his expression never wavering. “You have a good job, Marie. You’re a talented wildlife photographer, and you make good money. You don’t need college. Besides, it’s a dangerous world out there. At least here I can keep you safe.”

I couldn’t help the incredulous laugh that escaped my lips. “Dangerous? Dad, I’ve faced grizzly bears in the wild, and you’re worried about me going to college?”

He sighed, running a hand through his graying hair. “It’s not just about the danger. It’s about the values and principles you’ll encounter out there. You know how important our faith is to me.”

I understood my father’s concerns, but I couldn’t let them dictate my life forever. “Dad, I’ll never abandon our faith. But I need to grow as a person, to find my own path, and college is a part of that. Other people go at eighteen years of age to help embrace themselves, but I didn’t.”

His gaze softened, and he reached across the desk to place a reassuring hand on mine. “Marie, I just want what’s best for you. You’re my only family, and I worry about you.”

Tears welled up in my eyes, and I felt a pang of guilt for defying him. “I know, Dad. But I need to do this. I need to be my own person.”

He shook his head at me. “You can be your own person here, Marie. Who knows who you’ll meet out there? I mean, I know everyone here. I know there’s nothing to worry about.”

I narrowed my eyes at him. “What is that supposed to mean? What people?”

“You know what I mean. Men.” He folded his arms across his chest. “I don’t want you getting hurt by some idiot man. You deserve so much better than that.”

I rolled my eyes angrily. “Dad, I’m not going to date anyone here because I know them all. Because I don’t want to date any of them. They’re no good.”

“And you think the men out there will be any better? You’re going to be sorely mistaken.”

I gritted my teeth together, enraged honestly. All I wanted to do was live a normal life, to do what everyone did. I couldn’t believe that I was having so much trouble trying to just do ordinary things. Over the years, I’d dated a couple of guys in this town, but it never worked out. They were immature and annoying. More sibling-like because we’d lived in the same place forever and we all knew one another too well.

I needed to get out, before this crushed my soul.

“Dad, I need to go. I have to.”

“You can’t go, Marie. I won’t support you.”

I knew what he meant with this. That he wouldn’t support me financially so I could go. I did earn a good wage with my photography, but it wasn’t enough. I couldn’t start a new life with that money, so if I was going to do this of my own accord then I would have to get a second job. I knew my father wouldn’t like that, of course, but I was going to have to stand on my own two feet somehow. I would just have to do this on my own.

“Okay, well, I guess there’s nothing else we can talk about then, is there?”

I rose up to my feet, staring down at my father who wasn’t going to budge one bit. “Thanks for hearing me out, even if you don’t really want to listen to me.”

Dad was the one who now gritted his teeth, but I still wasn’t going to just let him have his own way. I’d spent the last twenty-odd years backing down and letting him win, but now I couldn’t do it. Now I was starting to realize that I needed to find some inner strength.

“Marie, one day you will see that I’m doing all of this for your own good,” he insisted, despite knowing that was going to wind me up further. “I have forty-seven years of life under my belt. I know what I’m talking about. I have had life experience, you know? I’ve been through some stuff, so I know what’s happening here, and I know what’s best for you.”

I wanted to scream. I wanted to let everything out so he could really see, but I knew that wasn’t going to get me anywhere. He would just start talking about Mom again, and I didn’t want that. I couldn’t stand hearing the stories of Mom when I was just a baby because she was ‘too young to be a mother’ and ‘couldn’t handle marriage’. Just because Dad was twenty-three when I was born and Mom twenty-one didn’t mean I was going to make all the same mistakes.

Why couldn’t I make him see that?

Why couldn’t I make him understand that I wasn’t him and Mom? That I wouldn’t mess up. That I wouldn’t do anything too young? I knew he was scared of losing me., but at the same time that didn’t mean he should stifle me. At this rate, he was going to lose me forever! I was starting to feel like I should just run away from here and never come back.

“I need to get going,” I muttered, almost under my breath because I needed to escape sooner rather than later. “I have a lot of stuff to do.”

I couldn’t just hide away in my bedroom, not with all of this angst surging through my veins. I needed to get out of here. Unfortunately, Wolf Mountain was little more than a hamlet, so there wasn’t far for me to go or much for me to do. I was just going to have to try.

I slammed the front door as I walked through the town to just try and get my head in order. The town was small, but warm, I suppose. That was one thing I loved about it. It was nestled in a picturesque valley surrounded by the Medicine Bow Mountain range and lush forests as far as the eye could see.

I reached the main street, not paying too much attention to the quaint shops lining each side, but I also couldn’t ignore them as I walked. There was the old-fashioned diner where locals gathered for hearty breakfasts and steaming cups of coffee. The scent of freshly baked pies wafted through the air, drawing me in as I passed by the bakery’s cheerful storefront.

Colorful flower baskets hung from lamp posts adding a burst of color, leading me toward the park where I could hear children laughing and playing on the swings. I had spent many a day playing in that park laughing along with my friends too, but it was such a small space. It was all too little. I was feeling confined here, desperate for any possible way out.

Eventually, I reached the local community bulletin board. It was a rickety wooden structure adorned with faded flyers and announcements, a hub of information in our small town. I hoped to find some part-time job listings that would help me save money for college and everything I wanted to achieve.

Dad was going to be angry. Everything I did here was going to annoy him, but I was done allowing him to control me. It was time for me to control my own future in any way I could.

As I perused the bulletin board, my heart skipped a beat when I saw the unmistakable handwriting on a neatly pinned piece of paper. It read: Nanny Needed – Jesse Rivers . My old crush, my father’s buddy, and the object of my secret affection, Jesse Rivers, was looking for a nanny for his daughter.

Memories of my teenage years flooded back–the stolen glances, the awkward conversations, and the dreams I had woven around Jesse. He had always been a part of my life, a constant presence in my father’s circle of friends. Of course, it was a one-way thing. I was the only one creating a relationship in my mind. There was no way Jesse ever looked at me as anything other than my father’s daughter, but that didn’t change my feelings.

He was a striking figure, tall and muscular, his presence commanding attention wherever he went. His rugged charm was accentuated by his dark brown hair, which always seemed to have a hint of tousled disarray, and his deep, penetrating eyes that held a world of secrets.

Jesse had a way about him, a magnetic charisma that drew people in, and I was no exception. His voice was a low, rumbling timbre that resonated deep whenever he spoke. It was a voice that could soothe and comfort or ignite a fire of passion with just a few words.

But now, he was more than just a crush. He was an opportunity for me to gain some financial independence. Nannying for him could give me everything I needed.

I couldn’t deny the allure of the job. Looking after Jesse’s daughter, Belle, sounded like a dream come true. I had always been good with children, and Belle was known for being a spirited and energetic toddler. Plus, it would mean spending more time with Jesse, even if it was in a professional capacity.

Still, doubts gnawed at the edges of my resolve. Could I handle being so close to the man I had admired from afar for years without revealing my true feelings? What if I ended up making a fool of myself, jeopardizing our friendship? Or worse, my father’s trust? Much as I wanted to stand up for myself with my father, I didn’t want to sever our relationship completely. I just wanted him to accept that I was an adult now and I could make my own rules in life.

I gripped the flyer, snatching it from the bulletin board, and I clutched it between my fingers. My heart pounded as I tried to decide what to do. I could hardly catch my breath as my head spun angrily. I didn’t know what to do for the best. I was torn between my head and heart, and I wasn’t sure which way things were going to go.

I need this, I told myself firmly. I need this job.

I gave myself a little pep talk, trying to sway myself one way or the other, and eventually, I made the choice I knew I had to. This wasn’t about my father, and it certainly wasn’t about any silly crush from the past. This was about the money that I so desperately needed to spread my wings and fly free.

With newfound determination, I reached for my phone and dialed Jesse’s number. My heart raced with each ring, and I couldn’t help but wonder what would happen next. Was he going to be happy to hear from me? Or would he be annoyed because he knew this would wind up my father? I really hoped that he would give me a chance to do this because I was sure that I could do a good job with Belle. I was certain that she and I could bond and make this work perfectly.

Finally, Jesse’s deep, rumbling voice answered on the other end. “Hello?”

I took a deep breath, steadying my nerves because his voice affected me deeply. He made me feel a million unexpected things all at once, which was not how I wanted this conversation to go. I wanted Jesse to see me as the adult I was these days, just like my father.

But to make that happen, I was going to have to speak.

“Hi, Jesse. It’s Marie Oldfield. I saw your ad for a nanny on the community bulletin board. I was wondering if we could talk about it.”

The silence was agonizing. I wished so desperately that I could reach through the phone to pull him through so I could see his reaction. I wanted to know what expressions were flicking across his face right now, I wanted to see how his body language was. This would have definitely been better as a face-to-face conversation, but I suppose this was the only way I could do it.

Come on, Jesse, I thought desperately, trying to send the right vibes down the phone. Give me a chance, Jesse. I need this.

I clutched the phone tighter to my ear, willing the moments away. Why wasn’t he saying anything yet? Why wasn’t he giving me anything to go off? This was agony. Torture. What the hell was wrong with this man?