Chapter 4

Chapter Four

B efore Kiera got out of her car to head into the office, she checked her phone. For the last few days she’d been ignoring the notification that kept popping up, avoiding the dating app entirely. But now, she felt ready.

She had a match.

Her heart did something that seemed to resemble both falling and leaping. She didn’t recall it feeling like such an emotional rollercoaster last time she’d been single, in her early thirties.

It was blonde bob lady, who had not only matched with her, but had also sent her a message.

“Hi, I’m Hannah, how are you this dreary afternoon?”

Kiera looked up at the hospital, its three cylindrical structures towering over the city. It was now a sunny morning, which reminded her how long she’d sat on this message. She thought about the many people inside the building who were dealing with far bigger problems than responding to a woman on a dating app. Still, this was uncharted territory for her, and she needed backup. She scrolled to the numbers listed on her phone as ‘favourites’.

“Hey, Kiera,” said Lou, picking up quickly. “It’s early in the day for you to call. It’s not even 8am. You ok?”

“Yes, fine. Well, technically fine. But I’ve just had a message off the dating app and I have no idea what to do now.” Kiera spoke fast, her fingers digging into the rubber of the steering wheel.

She could hear Lou’s muffled voice, shouting at her children to put their shoes on.

“Sorry about that. Ok, love, I’m going to go out on a limb here… Respond!”

“You make it sound so easy,” said Kiera.

“Well, it kind of is,” said Lou. Now Kiera could hear the children in the background, calling out their various pre-school needs to their mother.

“But what do I say?”

“Tell her you haven’t had sex for over a year and you’re gagging for it,” said Lou. Then, muffled again, “no, Billy, your PE kit is not inside the fridge. And put that cheese back. Go on, upstairs, it’s in your room.”

“While that is technically true, I suspect it may be something of an overshare in my first message,” said Kiera, going pink despite the fact that she was alone in the car.

“So, just say ‘hi’ and see where it goes. Imagine you’ve just met her at a bar, it’s twenty years ago, and she’s registered an interest in you. What would you say?”

“Well, I guess that’s the point, I wouldn’t say very much, or indeed anything at all. This isn’t an age thing. I’ve always been bad at this.”

“JUST ANSWER THE MESSAGE,” said Lou, beginning to sound like she was talking to one of the children rather than Kiera .

“Ok!” said Kiera, lapsing into her teenage self. She giggled. “Sorry to disturb your morning. Has Billy found his PE kit?”

“Nope. I’m on my way upstairs to get it for him. Have a good one, hun.”

“Cheerio,” said Kiera.

So she had to respond. She wrote and re-wrote her message a few times, and then finally went with: “Hey, nice to hear from you and good to match. I’m new to all this. Do you have anything exciting planned for today?”

She pressed send, and then reread her message. She cursed herself for writing as though she was sending a letter to childhood pen pal. Chucking her phone into the bottom of her bag, she finally got out of the car.

“Hey, Charlie,” she said, as she took a seat at her desk in the tiny broom cupboard that passed for their office.

“Well, hello, sunshine,” replied her colleague, a huge smile on his face, accentuating his perfect cheekbones and smartly-cut greying hair.

“Oh my God,” said Kiera, rolling her eyes. “You totally got laid last night, didn’t you?”

“I may have. I may not,” he said, twirling in his office chair, his slim cut grey suit trousers contrasting with the pale yellow shirt he was wearing.

“I see, so you’re playing it coy, then.” Kiera logged into her computer and feigned disinterest. She opened her emails to see what carnage had ensued since she’d left work the night before. She knew Charlie was looking at her and waiting for her to ask more questions. She opened her calendar and checked her first meeting of the day. 9.30am. Enough time for a couple of cups of tea to make her feel more human. She could hear Charlie drumming his fingers on the desk .

“Sorry,” said Kiera, “did you want something?”

“Oh, you are so annoying when you’re being superior,” said Charlie, pushing himself back from the desk, his wheeled chair careering him into the wall just inches away.

Kiera laughed. “Alright, come on, spill. Who was he?”

“He was a lovely builder called Wayne – excellent moustache. He’s inspired me to try and grow one,” said Charlie, absentmindedly wheeling himself back to his desk and gripping a pencil between his nose and his upper lip.

“Really?” asked Kiera.

“Really.”

“So, was it good? Are you seeing him again?”

“Well,” said Charlie, stroking his pencil moustache, “yes, it was good and no, I’m obviously not seeing him again.”

Kiera sighed. “I just don’t get it.”

“Let’s not get started on that again,” said Charlie, putting the pencil down and scanning through an email.

“Hmm,” said Kiera.

“Oh, good lord,” said Charlie, “Rick wants to see me at 3pm. I hate it when he does that ‘can you just pop into my office’ thing but it’s hours away. He never gives a reason and it feels like being called to the headteacher’s office. I’m always convinced I’ve done something wrong.”

“Don’t stress,” Kiera told him. “He’ll just be after an update on something. It’ll be one of those meetings that could totally be an email.”

“You are of course right, petal,” said Charlie.

“And besides, you’re doing ok at the moment, right? Your team’s fully staffed, and the calls are being sorted in record time.”

“’Tis true,” Charlie replied, nodding in agreement. “I run the world’s greatest Patient Advice and Liaison Service. ”

“It’s been said before,” said Kiera.

“And it will be said again. Now then, how are your consultation groups going?”

“That’s what my 9.30 is about. We’re working out which services we’re going to review – I’ve got the Medical Director and the Director of Operations to entertain there, so I’m going to need a jammy dodger when I get back.” Kiera looked up at the shelf, on which sat a biscuit tin labelled ‘First Aid Kit’.

“I’ll have them ready, with a coffee and defibrillator paddles just in case,” said Charlie.