15. Delilah

Chapter 15

Delilah

" A urelia?"

"Hey babes!" My sister chirps on the other end of the phone. "I'm just about to hop on the tube, so if the connection goes down—"

"Can you come over here?"

"Yeah… hang on… excuse me!" I hear the shuffle of feet and the muffled grumblings of disgruntled businessmen before Aurelia's voice pops back up, breathless. "Why do people not understand the meaning of excuse me? Christ. Anyway, what's up?"

"I've got a code pink."

It's not as bad as a code red, but still, code pink means it's urgent.

"Pink?" she repeats. "I'll be there in fifteen minutes… want me to bring anything?"

"Wine," I croak, staring down at my hands, the skin dry from being in the chemical chlorine only an hour or so ago. "A big bottle of wine."

Aurelia makes it to my apartment with five minutes to spare, a bottle of white wine clutched in her hand like a lifeline. She slumps against the doorframe once I've unlocked the door, panting and holding her side.

"Ran… all the way… bastard stairs…" She thrusts the neck of the bottle to me. "Drink, please."

In the kitchen, I pour us two big glasses, before handing one off to Aurelia, who folds herself into the depths of my sofa, rubbing at the blister forming on the back of her heel.

I stay standing, gulping at the wine, and then beginning to pace, tugging at the back of my earring.

"What's going, Delilah? Code pink… that's not as bad as our code red, but seriously, you're freaking me out a little bit, I—"

"I slept with Grey."

I stop pacing enough to glance over at Aurelia, finding her fighting back a grin but unable to stop the mischievous twinkle lighting up in her eyes.

She takes a slurp of her wine. "When?"

"Saturday night. After you and Sophie went home."

"Was it good?"

"Aurelia!"

She raises both of her manicured eyebrows at me. "Well? Was it?"

I take another mouthful of wine, feeling the alcohol fizz upon my tastebuds. "Yes."

"I knew it! As soon as I saw him, I thought that man knows what he's doing with his—"

"We spent Sunday together too." I interrupt before Aura can finish her lewd sentence. "We agreed two nights, to get each other out of our systems, but then… I came home Monday night, and he was everywhere, Aura. On the sofa, in my kitchen, at my bookshelves, in my bed. I couldn't stop picturing him and wondering what he was doing. Tuesday was the same; sitting there in the board meeting not listening to a single fucking thing, because all I could imagine was how I'd feel if Grey was waiting here in this apartment for me. I can't sleep. Every buzz of my phone I'm picking it up thinking it's him."

My younger sister's delight has now morphed into disbelief, I see it written all over her face; her lips parted, eyes wide, wine abandoned on the coffee table. She's not even used a coaster. I can't find it within myself to give a shit. "Delilah—"

"He text me early this morning, he finished the book I'd loaned him and I was fucking giddy at seeing his name pop up on my phone, Aura. Giddy . I wasn't sure if I should go this evening, to my swimming lesson, but it was like I couldn't stop myself. I went out and bought a different swimsuit and everything, I couldn't stop thinking about him watching me as I tried it on in the changing rooms."

"What did Grey—"

Suddenly, my legs feel like jelly, the thoughts in my mind come to the surface a lot slower, as if they are wading through syrup. I sit down beside my sister, wine sloshing over my trousers with the force of my seat.

"Aura, he admitted he likes me. He said he can't stop thinking about me, I'm not out of his system… he wants to take me out on a date. Asked me, right then and there, in the fucking pool."

"And what did you say?" Aura breaths. "Please, tell me you didn't just up and leave, because I swear to god, Delilah—"

"I kissed him, and I said yes."

A high-pitched squeal leaves Aurelia's lips, her whole body practically coming off the sofa to wrap me up in a hug.

"Oh my god, Delilah!"

"What am I going to do?" I can't hug her back. Fear is beginning to paralyse me. "I should cancel—"

"Don't you dare!" Aurelia pulls back to look in my eyes. "Why would you cancel?"

"Because I'm terrified of putting my trust in someone again only for it to be broken."

"But you trusted Grey with your body this weekend."

"That's different," I say, peering down into my wine glass.

"How?"

"I don't know, Aura. It-it just is. I thought it would be a one-time thing and then it would be over with – this wanting for him. But it didn't work out that way. This date… it means Grey wants to get to know me, he'll be holding parts of me, in his hands and… and I'm not in control of what Grey does with those parts of me. He could throw them away, or crush them, or—"

"Or he could keep them safe."

My eyes flick up to Aurelia's.

"I know you like your control," she says, voice steady. "And I know the thought of getting your trust broken again is terrifying, Delilah. It would be easier to cancel but keeping a tight leash on your control can't sustain you forever, it won't make you happy. You can't keep letting fear or the what ifs rule your life. You took a risk going swimming, you took a risk going to the swimming lessons, you took a risk sleeping with Grey. I know you won't like to hear this, but sometimes taking a risk can pay off."

"And if it doesn't?" I hate how quiet my voice sounds, how much I lean into my younger sister for support. I'm the older one, it should be her leaning on me .

"Then at least you can say you tried. You need to take the risk, Delilah."

"Okay." I nod into Aurelia's shoulder, breathing in the familiar scent of her lavender perfume. "I won't cancel."

Soft lips kiss my cheek, squeezing me tight while I remind myself, I'm safe and in control right in this moment, hoping the paralysing fear I can feel sprinting up and down my nervous system will ease its painful grip on me soon.

A large part of me really does want to go out with Grey, but the other part of my brain is determined to hold me back because of fear. I don't know which part will win out the battle in the long run.

Aurelia pushes the glass of wine back into my hand, plucking her own from the coffee table and pulls my pink throw over the two of us.

"So, where is he taking you?"

"I don't know yet. He said he'd ring me tonight once he finished work."

Aurelia nods. "Don't overthink it too much, alright? Maybe we should make some food. I don't know about you, but I haven't eaten anything since lunch."

I'm grateful for the distraction, and even more grateful for my sister, as we both pad over to my kitchen to see what we can whip up together.

Homemade pizzas secured; we take them back to the coffee table once the shop bought dough is cooked and perfectly crispy. I steal a slice of Aurelia's pepperoni, while she nabs some of my Hawaiian, flicking through the dismal TV guide to find something we can watch.

Sinking back into the cushions, I watch Aurelia lick tomato sauce from her fingertips, crunching on a pizza crust of my own, content.

Then, from its spot on the coffee table, my phone begins to ring.

Aurelia beats me too it, leaning over to check the caller ID. "It's him."

I swallow, take a sip of my wine, and then swipe my thumb over the keypad, accepting the call.

"Hello?"

Grey's smooth voice kisses my ears. "Hi, Delilah."

Beside me, Aurelia silently squeals, able to hear Grey, what with the volume on my phone being up so high.

I stand, turning the volume down as I go, walking into my bedroom. "How was work after I left?"

"Everything was fine, I'm back home now. What are you doing?"

"Aurelia's round. We're having something to eat, a few glasses of wine…"

"Sounds fun." I can hear the smile in Grey's voice. "Are you feeling okay after… after what we talked about?"

I perch myself on my vanity chair before I fall down. "Yeah."

"Yeah? Good, because I thought we could go out on Saturday. How does going to the V and A museum sound? There's a new exhibit about a collection of books my mum used to read to me, plus you like your books and history, so—"

"How do you know I like history?"

"I did some more snooping through your bookshelves on Monday morning when you were getting dressed. You've got quite the collection of Victorian history books going there."

I laugh. "So, I do. Although, I didn't take you for a snooper."

"Massive." I can picture Grey, eyes twinkling as he admits it. "So, is that a yes?"

"It's a yes."

"I'll come pick you up, one o'clock alright?"

"Perfect."

"We can go for lunch after, talk about this book series you've got me hooked on."

"Have you started the second book?" I grin, recalling Grey's smirk when I'd slipped the book in his hand at the front desk before I left.

"I'm about to start it now. Is this one as filthy as the first?'

"Worse."

Grey groans, something deep and masculine vibrating through my bones. I want to hear him make that noise for me, to know I'm the one pulling that sound from his lungs.

"You're trying to kill me off, I swear. First, that bikini and now this… fucking hell."

"It's called keeping you on your toes…"

"Whatever you want to call it, gorgeous. I'm here for it."

Pleasure skitters down my spine at the use of his nickname for me. I remember the way he whimpered it whilst deep inside me. I wonder if I can make him say it while I get down on my knees for him and—

Aurelia peeks her head through the doorway, eyebrows wagging, thumbs moving up and then down in a silent question. I send her a thumbs up, ignoring her audible squeal of delight this time and turn back to my phone.

"I'll see you on Saturday, Grey."

"I can't wait. Good night, Delilah."

Before I've even ended the call, Aurelia is throwing her arms around me, pinching my aching cheeks, where I can't seem to stop smiling.

"You're so into him! What's happening on Saturday? Where's he taking you?"

"To the Victoria and Albert Museum, he's picking me up at one." I sound dreamlike to my own ears, in sheer disbelief. It's been so long since I've been on a proper date, I—

"No spiralling," Aurelia warns me, able to feel the tensing of my body. "We'll pick you out a dress to wear, shoes to go with it… I can get you a cute set of lingerie from work if you think you're gonna—"

"Shush."

"What?! You're the one who's already slept with him! I'm just being a helpful sister."

My legs are turning to jelly again. "Can I even do this, Aura?"

"Yes, you can, and you're going too. You're going to have an amazing time, Delilah, just you watch."