Eight

I feel like an asshole. I could've been honest and told Teagan about my past, but it's for her safety that I keep things bottled up. I don't want my shit to land on her shoulders. A half-truth is better than no truth, in my opinion. And if anything happened to Teagan because of me. I wouldn't be able to forgive myself.

I watch Teagan work, knowing I almost caused her to lose this entire shop today. I can't control what comes out of my mouth sometimes. But Teagan was right; Nancy is a cunt. I needed to scare her, and she can't keep getting away with this shit .

Whoever this Montgomery family is, they can't have that much of a hold on this town. There's no way. The mayor has to be doing his job, or what's the point of having one? She has to be blowing the mayor to be getting away with all this shit, or she wouldn't be in office still. And what the fuck does her husband do?

"Silas?" her voice comes out alarmed.

I turn and come face to face with Elma. The old bat stares at me, judging me. I know it; she knows it. I don't belong here but jokes on her. I'm not leaving.

"How can I help you today, Elma?" I smile down at her.

"What are you doing here?"

Oh, I love playing these games. "I work here. Didn't you know that?"

"No."

I drop my bottom lip in a pout before smiling in victory. "Wow. Something the rumour queen doesn't know. I'm shocked, to be honest. You must be slacking, Elma."

"You should watch what you say, Silas. I could ruin your life."

"I doubt that. I ruin my own life just by breathing. If you think I'm afraid of an old lady that spreads shit around town worse than a farmer spreading manure, you're wrong. Now find a book or leave. "

Her jaw hits the floor, and her eyes nearly pop out of her head. I'm gonna go out on a limb and assume no one talks like that to her. Good thing I don't hold back. Sugar-coating shit isn't in my vocabulary. The way she's still staring at me makes me feel victorious. Gossip is the worst kind.

Elma narrows her eyes at me, moving closer to me. "You'd best be watching yourself. I have ways of discovering things you don't want others to know." She glances at Teagan.

"Don't drag anyone into things you have no business in."

"I'll give you one warning, don't hurt her."

A warning coming from a seventy-year-old is hilarious; what's the worst she's gonna do to me, beat me with a cane? I'm not worried one little bit. I turn my back and get back to stocking books. The more I ignore her, the better. She'll figure it out eventually that threats don't work on me, and I don't scare easily.

The burner phone I keep on me vibrates in my back pocket—another reminder of my past. No matter how much I want to answer it, I can't. I promised myself not to return to that life and am determined to keep it that way, even though some days are more challenging to say no .

Life in Holden isn't exciting, but I'm trying to make it work. It's safe, and right now, I need that. I can't get shot on the streets here, and that's a win in my books. I'm afraid what would happen if I did go back to the city; my ass would be grass.

I definitely didn't see myself getting a job in a bookstore. This came out of left field, but I'm glad I took it. Even if she doesn't want things to move beyond friendship, at least I'll have her like this. Being this close to Teagan is perfect. But it isn't everything; that's why something else comes out at night.

If she ever discovered my secret, she would never trust me, considering that trust is already walking a thin line. What friendship we have would be gone, and I wouldn't be able to handle it. I need Teagan in my life no matter how I get it, even if I steal it little by little.

"Silas? Did you scare away Elma?"

I grin before turning around to find Teagan peeking around the bookshelf. "I might have. She was being nosey like always. Doesn't she get tired of doing that all day long?"

"She gets bored. This is her form of entertainment. Just give her a lie and let her chase it for a little while. It'll make her happy."

"I'm not starting a rumour about myself just to make her happy. That's only asking for trouble, Dimples." I move closer, tipping her chin to look into her green eyes. "If someone is going to talk about me, it'll only be facts. Now. What else do you have for me, boss?"

She backs away until my hand drops. "I don't have anything else for you. You can head home for the day. And I won't need you for the weekend."

"Oh, why not?"

"It's usually quiet around here, and I'm closed on Sundays. Take the much needed rest. I'll see you Monday." She turns and walks away.

"Um, yeah. See ya."

I'm not sure what went down. She was fine one second ago, and now she's giving me the cold shoulder. Does she want to be friends or not? Is this strictly a work-related situation and nothing more? I need her to tell me what's what. I'm not going to stick around, and guess what our relationship is from now on.

I wrap up what I'm working on before I leave. I tried to say goodbye to Teagan, but she was too busy with a customer. I kind of feel like a dog licking its wound because I didn't get the attention I needed from my owner. I know this is exactly what I wanted. So why am I suddenly acting like it isn't? Having some distance is ideal because it prevents anyone from getting too attached .

Moving outside, I take in the crisp air. It's hard to believe it's already halfway through September, but in a way, I wish it was summer again. Just for the heat, Fall is perfect because the bugs have fucked all the way off.

Now I'm unsure what to do with my time; maybe I should've picked up a different hobby instead of reading and ignoring my phone, which keeps ringing. I almost wish I hadn't sold my car; a trip into the city would have been handy right about now—something to take my mind off her.

It's like the universe is trying to tell me something because the burner phone rings again. And I question myself why I carry the stupid phone around.

"What do you want?" I drew a breath through my teeth, trying to remain calm. I move down a back alley so no nosey Elma can eavesdrop.

"Blackwell, don't be like that. You left us, not the other way around. I still don't understand why. You were on fire here, and now what? You're fucking nothing."

"Leroy, what do you want?" I duck down an alley to stay out of sight. "I got out for a reason."

"Yeah, then why did you answer the phone? There must be a part of you that wants to go back in; that town must be boring. Bring them some action, Silas. Give the old prunes something to gossip about over tea."

It would be nice to have some action again, the thrill of the chase. I can't believe I'm thinking about going back. Am I so bored sitting around that I would reconsider working with Leroy again? Fuck me.

"Give me the details, and I'll be there tomorrow."

"Attaboy. I knew I could count on you."

I hang up before he can say anything else. What I wanna do is bang my head off the brick wall and watch my brain drip down. I can't believe I did that. Now Leroy owns me again; I'll never get out. A text comes through with the time and place, and the asshole even adds a smiley face emoji.

Now I need to find a goddamn car and fast. If Leroy thinks I'm spending all this time in the city working for him, he's wrong, and I need to be back by Monday. Teagan can't know what I'm doing. All these secrets are too much for me. I'm waiting for the guilt to start eating at me; it hasn't hit me so far, so it must be a good sign.

It isn't till later that night when regret sinks in. Taking this job may not be the most brilliant move I've made in my life—although I've done worse. I just need to remind myself the past and present Silas can't mingle. It would be explosive, and Teagan would never forgive me .

I was lucky enough to find an old beater to use, and if need be, I can always sell it so I can't do this shit for Leroy ever again. I can't do it, it can't happen again. Leroy can't bring his shit to this town, and neither can I.

There's one thing I need to do before I leave. I grab and pull on my hoodie and retrieve the most important thing before heading back to her shop. I make sure to act naturally and not draw attention. I wait in the café until I see Teagan walk across the street; when she's a reasonable distance away, I leave the café and follow her. I sneak into the bush across the street after a couple of blocks and quietly observe her as she goes inside The Lucky Dragon. All I can do now is wait for her; I slip my mask on and cover my identity. She has to know by now that someone has been watching her. I made it obvious the other night by mistake when I kept hitting the branch by her window. Fifteen minutes later, she struts out with a bag of goodies. I casually stock her as I shadow her all the way back to her place. I hug the bushes tight, trying to keep out of sight. When she pauses, I sneak between the bush and a house. With a flick of my mask, I reveal myself. It's even more thrilling now that she knows of my watchful eyes.

This makes the game even more pleasurable—well, for me, at least. Teagan will come around eventually. I step further down the sidewalk when she doesn't move, but she still never moves. Either she's being brave, or this is something she's into.

The game is just beginning.