45. Luca

Chapter forty-five

Luca

I prop my head on my hand and watch the path of my finger as I drag it down Kylie's spine, deciding its time. My gut churns when I think about her possible rejection after giving her the full truth. It's almost laughable how scared I am. I lived through hell as a child, and it's this innocent angel of mine that scares me the most.

The thought of her leaving me when she finds out how I manipulated her contract, or hell, that I own Sweet Connections has me nervous. Joining is one thing, but will owning it cross the line? Her father is a cop, after all.

I sigh. The little devil sits on my shoulder telling me to just keep it to myself. If I'm smart, I would wait until I get a ring on her finger.

Except, I can't. It'll hurt her more in the long run. I must tell her now, no matter how badly she takes the news. I won't let her walk out of my life even if I have to kidnap her myself.

"Angel?" I continue the lazy pattern on her back, hoping to keep her in this calm state.

"Hmm?" Her reply is tranquil, telling me the time is now or never. She's lying on her stomach where I left her after our last round of lovemaking. Her arms rest tucked under the pillow as she faces the opposite direction. If I were to leave her to it, she would be asleep in a few more minutes .

"I have some things I need to tell you now that we've agreed to continue without the contract."

Her eyes flick open, but otherwise she doesn't move. "Okay."

"Your contract—while real, it wasn't done through Sweet Connections."

After a brief pause of silence, she flips to her side to face me, brushing my hand off in the process. She reaches for the sheet to cover herself before meeting my gaze. As we stare at each other, I lay my hand on her hip.

"You never technically signed on with Sweet Connections. I asked Margaret to keep you out of the system." Her furrowed brows turn into a scowl, so I rush on, "I did it for selfish reasons. I wanted you for myself. The moment I laid eyes on you, I knew I had to have you and I just didn't want to risk anyone else having access to your profile."

"Why would Margaret do that? Is it because you allow them to use your club for the meet and greets?"

"No." I take a deep breath. "It's because I own Sweet Connections."

Her mouth pinches, and her nostrils flare as her eyes narrow. "I'm sorry, what?"

Before I can respond, she rolls away. She's quick, but I'm quicker and stronger. I'm on her the minute she's on her back.

"Get off me." She angrily pushes at my chest, so I grab her wrist to pull it above her head. "Let me go, you asshole!" Her knee comes up and barely misses my groin as I slide in-between her legs to prevent my dick from becoming her next target.

"Angel—" is all I get out before she shouts.

"Damnit, Luca." She uses her free hand to beat on my chest, but she's not putting her heart into it. My angel would never want to hurt anyone, even in her own hurt.

Grunting, I grab her free hand and pull it to her other one.

It's then I realize what a sick fuck I am because her struggles are turning me on. All I want to do is slam my dick inside of her and take her. Roughly.

"Let me go. You have no right to hold me down after what you just said to me." She uses her feet to push my legs off, but she doesn't have the strength .

"Angel, I'm not letting you out of this bed until you hear everything. If you're still angry after, then we'll deal with it, but I won't let you walk out without knowing it all."

She growls, plants her feet on the mattress to shove her hips upwards, trying to dislodge me. The only thing she does is make my dick harder.

Fuck, I'm going straight to hell.

Unable to stop myself, I grind down on her and find her wet with her own desire. Since we have no clothes between us, she can't hide how turned on our fighting has made her as well.

I take a closer look. As she continues to half heartedly try to free herself, her eyes become more dilated and her face flushes as she pants with her efforts. Fuck, I can't wait to explore this later. My need for her almost outweighs doing the right thing here. If I take her now, she would give in willingly, but I can't do that to her. Not when I know she'll be mad at herself after.

I give her a punishing kiss until she finally stops her struggles and responds. When she becomes complaisant in my arms, I pull back to find her eyes glazed with desire. My dick grows harder if that's even possible, when she gyrates, sliding her pussy along my length. I pull back, hating having to stop this.

"Please. Just let me tell you everything. Give me this and if you still hate me after …"

Kylie stills, clenches her teeth, but then heaves an enormous sigh before nodding.

"Thank you." Relieved, I kiss her quickly before pulling back to explain. I need her to see my sincerity. To know what I tell her is true.

"I started Sweet Connections about four years ago. I did it for several reasons, one being I knew it would be a profitable business."

Kylie rolls her eyes, but stays silent. I almost grin.

"I also wanted it for women in hopeless circumstances to have an alternative to earn money."

She frowns, her eyes trying to read my own .

"Growing up where I did, you could find a lot of women on the streets. They had pimps who treated them like trash, but those women had no choice. Consider why you became a sugar baby. While you never would've turned to the streets, your situation was desperate enough that you signed with Sweet Connections. Would you ever have imagined being desperate enough to do that a year ago?"

She looks away, but after a few seconds of silence, Kylie's face softens and the tension in her arms releases. She takes a deep breath before replying, "Yeah. I hated doing it, but …"

"You felt like you had no other choice." I finish for her.

She brings her gaze back to mine and swallows. "Yeah."

Hoping she's past the need to get away from me, I release her wrist and slide to her side, propping myself on my elbow and resting my head on my hand. She turns to face me again, tucking the sheet to her chest. I'm relieved she's open to hearing me out, so I keep my hands to myself for now.

"I've seen desperate people do desperate things over the years. When women pursued me after I started making money, it got me thinking. I didn't want to be with anyone because of my money and I knew other men who felt the same. This company not only helps women in desperate situations, it also gives wealthy men a place to go where everything is out in the open. It can be freeing for a man who's been manipulated by greed. Hell, it's been freeing for wealthy women as well. They have just as much trouble finding men who don't only want them for their money."

She tucks her hand under her pillow and looks at my chin. "That sounds cold. Purposely dating knowing they only want their money, not to pursue a real relationship."

"Yes, but it's a real issue. Anyone with money has to be careful who they let into their lives. Greed is sadly a powerful motivation for a lot of people." I gauge her expression and find the softness is still there. "What I told you at our first meeting is all true. I never thought myself capable of letting anyone in and it's tiresome trying to date a woman whose only goal is to marry a rich man."

"But you said you never took a sugar baby before me." Her eyes narrow on my face.

"And I haven't. Even that was too much of a commitment for me. If I wanted to scratch an itch, I would seek someone for a night and never see them again. For me, that was what worked best."

"Then why me?"

I move my gaze to the ceiling and chuckle at her question. "Angel, I've been asking myself that question since the beginning." Bringing my gaze back to hers, I continue, "I never had the answer until recently." I scratch my chin as I think about my response. "Your kidnapping put it all into perspective. Hell, even before that … which I still need to explain." I bring my gaze back to hers and brush the hair off her cheek, glad that she's allowing me that small comfort. "The only thing that makes sense to me now is that you were meant to be mine. If you asked me if I believed in that kind of thing just a short month ago, I would've said you were crazy. But now? It's the only logical explanation for me." I shake my head. "The moment I laid eyes on you, I think I fell in love. I just didn't know that's what it was."

"Luca."

There's so much love in her eyes. I vow that I will spend my life making sure I never lose that from her.

Clearing the emotion from my throat, I continue, "I know now that's why when I saw you standing outside the Sweet Connections office, I had to have you and why I made it so no one else could. Rafael went to Margaret to keep her from putting you in the system. I was going to offer you a contract that you couldn't resist so I could keep you to myself. I told myself I was doing you a favor." Chuckling again, I shake my head at my brilliance and stupidity. "You were obviously in a desperate situation and needed money. I had that money and I could help you while keeping you to myself." I shrug a shoulder. "It made sense at the time."

Kylie huffs, but not in anger. "I can admit, you did me a favor. I never wanted to sign up and I'm happy to know I'm not in the system. Plus, if I were to be assigned to anyone, I am glad it was you. I felt it too, on that first day. I even hoped for it. When you arrived at the club, I wondered if you were a member of Sweet Connections. Margaret told me about the meet ups at the club and I thought maybe you were there for that reason." She laughs humorlessly. "I'm such an idiot, but thanks to you, it all worked out." She sighs. "I have no right to be mad at you. I understand why you wouldn't tell me any of that in the beginning. Hell, I was warned I had no right to any private information from you, so I know better." She brings her gaze back to mine with a glare. "It's a good thing you told me this now because the minute we stopped the contract, those rules were out the window."

Chuckling, I dip down for another kiss. "Yes, my Angel."

She dips her gaze to the mattress. Confused by her sudden shyness, I place a finger under her chin to bring her eyes back to mine. "What's wrong?"

She swallows, then bites her lip as she searches my eyes. I wait patiently, knowing she's afraid of whatever she's about to spring on me.

"As you know, sugar babies have strict rules. If you truly want a real relationship with me—"

"I do." I state firmly.

"—then you know that you haven't gotten all of me yet."

"Explain," I don't like where she's going with this.

"What if you don't like the real me?"

"Are you trying to tell me that the Kylie I've gotten the past month is not the real you?" I frown, even knowing that's not true.

"No. I've been myself, but I've also held back. Like I said, I had rules to follow. Now that we are truly together, I won't hold back anymore."

"I wouldn't want you to."

"But you're so used to being single. What if you don't like me invading your privacy?"

I sigh, finally understanding where she's going with this. "Baby, I may not have allowed anyone in my life before, but I know that in order to truly be with you, I have to allow you in completely. Just as you will need to allow me into your life completely. "

"You say that, but I want to know everything. Maybe not tonight, but I want to get to know all of you. I … I want what my parents have. They know everything about each other, the good and the bad. I want that with you."

"Call me crazy, but I want that as well." I exhale. "I have a lot of bad from my childhood and while I won't keep that from you, can we save that for tomorrow? We've covered enough for one night, don't you think?"

She kisses my chin before responding. "I can wait. As long as you don't keep me at arm's length, I can give you all the time you need." Then she sits up, still holding the sheet to herself. She bites her lip in worry and I brace. "I need to confess something, too."

"Okay." I tilt my head, leery.

"I found the picture in your watch drawer. I wasn't snooping—well, I didn't intend to snoop. It was that first night you brought me here. I was looking for the swimsuits you said were here. I went through your closet thinking I'd find them there, and that's when I found the picture."

Her eyes bounce between mine, worried as my chest seizes.

"Babe, I agreed to give you time. I don't need to hear it all now. I just wanted you to know I'm aware of the picture."

Finally able to breathe again, I nod and run my hand through my hair. "It's not a good story and I'll tell you. It actually ties into what I want to bring up tomorrow." I stop talking as I fight to keep my emotions in check. I hate to taint her with my past, especially when her own upbringing was filled with so much love.

"It's okay, Luca. Really. I'll be here when you're ready." She leans down to kiss me before pulling back just enough to make eye contact when she finally tells me what I need to hear. "I love you, Luca. As crazy as it is, I love you."

"Angel." I wrap my hand around her neck and pull her back to me to show her just how much I love her in return.