CHAPTER SIX

Loki

"I got you," Haven reassures, making sure she's there to capture Livvy before she completely falls apart.

Haven wraps her arms around Livvy, pulling her tight to her body while Livvy hyperventilates.

Alpha moves to step forward, but Haven holds out her hand to stop him, then spins Livvy to face her, holding Livvy by her arms, forcing her to look right at Haven. "Liv, I know this is scary. I know how the club handles things isn't the way you want your life to be. I mean, let's be honest, you took an oath in your job to ‘do no harm,' to help people, not hurt them… right?"

Livvy's tears stream down her face, and she slowly nods. Alpha's watching every move his Old Lady is making with his ex-wife, though Haven continues, "But Livvy, think about it. This guy, Ricco, he's not just any guy, is he?"

Livvy's breathing begins to slow, and she hesitantly glances over her shoulder at the box again, then back to Haven. "H-he took my daughter."

A slow smile crosses Haven's face. "Yes. This asshole is the man who stole Poppy from you and Alpha. Who sent her to The Nest to be a bird like me? So think about it, Livvy… this is what you've been waiting for."

Suddenly, it's like the tension in the air evaporates, and calmness washes over Livvy's face. Her tears stop, her shaking ceases, and she turns slowly, stepping back up to the box on the table, really looking at the severed head.

Her left eye twitches and something flicks through her mind when I see her eyes narrow. Her muscles tense again, her cheeks flush a shade of crimson as her breathing increases again. But this time, it's not out of fear.

She's angry.

I'd say she's fucking furious and about ready to snap.

Without a second's notice, Livvy turns, reaching for the blade attached to Haven's belt, and yanks it clear. Alpha moves to stop Livvy as I stand, unsure of what her intentions are, but Haven blocks Alpha as Livvy rushes for the box and slams the blade straight down into Ricco's eye, letting out a guttural scream as she does.

My stomach clenches, watching the anguish in her face. She clearly needs this outlet as she takes out the years of pain.

I sit back down in my seat as Haven keeps her grip on Alpha, even though all he wants to do is rush to Livvy.

Though we all know Livvy needs this— just like Alpha did.

Livvy lets out the biggest scream, tears flooding her eyes again, her emotions overwhelming her now as she stabs Ricco a second time, letting all her frustration out.

Haven finally lets Alpha go, and he cautiously steps up to Livvy's side, placing his hand on her shoulder. In her fit of rage, she lifts the blade up to him, but he simply stares at her with a weak smile. "It's okay, Liv… we're all going to be okay now," he whispers to her.

With shaky hands, she drops the blade to the floor and lunges into Alpha's arms, tears streaming down her face. He holds her tight while she gathers the strength to compose herself.

His fingers stroke tenderly through her hair, continuing to calm her as she softly cries into his chest. The tender moment shared between ex-lovers somehow feels like the closure they have both been seeking.

It feels intrusive to watch.

Letting out a long breath, I chance a glance at Haven, who is watching the two of them intently. Honestly, Alpha really lucked out with her. She is incredibly supportive of his relationship with Livvy. It's refreshing to see a couple who is so trusting of each other that there's no jealousy between them at all.

They're just one big happy family.

Livvy finally pulls back from Alpha, wiping the tears from her face. "Thank you… thank you for avenging our baby girl," she whispers, straightening out her scrubs as if she is trying to make herself appear more presentable.

She glances over her shoulder at Haven, gives her a head nod, and then, without saying anything else, Livvy takes off for the exit like she needs a break from the emotion.

Alpha rolls his shoulders, moving to follow. "Liv, you shouldn't be alone right now."

But she doesn't reply and continues out of the Chapel, down the stairs.

Alpha grumbles under his breath, running his fingers through his hair. "Fuck, I should go. Make sure she is really okay."

Haven steps forward, sliding her arm around his waist. "I love you. I really do, but I think she needs some distance. It's too raw. This brought up many horrible memories for her, Alpha. Right now, she needs a friend, not her ex-husband. I'll go. Let me talk to her. Make sure she's okay."

Alpha scrubs at his beard but then nods and presses his lips to hers. "Have I told you how much I fucking worship the ground you walk on?"

Haven smirks and leans in kissing his cheek. "Constantly. But keep telling me, it's a good ego boost." She turns her attention to me. "I'm sure you guys have shit to discuss, but Loki… keep an eye on him for me, will you? If he starts to derail, come get me?"

Nodding my head, I give her a salute. "You got it, boss."

Haven gives Alpha another quick kiss, his hand sliding down to her ass and tightening his grip. I chuckle as she whimpers against him, then she pulls back, shaking her head. "I'm gonna take all your stress away tonight. Just you wait and see, big guy," she chimes, then shimmies her way out of the Chapel and down the stairs.

Grinning, I turn back to face Alpha to see him subtly rearranging his cock in his jeans as he moves back to his position at the head of the table and takes a seat. Alpha slumps down into his seat, his arms back behind his head, letting out a long groan. "Fuck me… I did not expect that!"

I lean back in my chair, letting myself get comfortable. "That was a pretty emotional moment for you and Liv, Pres. You doing okay? Honestly?"

Alpha rolls his shoulders, clearing his throat. He hesitates for a moment, like he is thinking through his answer, but then he turns to face me, his expression full of conviction. "Knowing Ricco was still out there, that there was this chance he could come after Poppy again and take her from me, was something that literally kept me up at night. I think for the first time in years, I might get a solid night's sleep tonight, Loki."

My chest squeezes, knowing that, as a club, we have helped. That, as a club, we have brought down one of the most notorious cartels in California.

Will there be ramifications? I don't know.

But for now, we need to celebrate the wins because Alpha, Livvy, Haven, and Poppy now have the freedom to live their lives as a family without this huge threat following them around.

"That's real fucking good to hear, Pres… real fucking good," I tell him honestly.

He leans forward, scrubbing his face and letting out a heavy exhale. "You think Haven is okay with everything?"

Raising a brow, I tilt my head. "Brother, you're one lucky sonofabitch. I can tell you that because I think Haven loves Livvy just as much as you do. To find a woman like Haven, who is remarkably accepting of the kind of relationship you and Livvy still have, is impossible… and yet, you found her. Haven might be a tough, kickass woman who knows how to handle anything life throws at her, but she has a human side too. She really is a rare find."

Alpha sits back, a slow smile crossing his face. "I need to marry that woman."

My eyes widen. "You said after Livvy you'd never marry again."

Alpha shrugs with a small laugh. "Everything with Livvy was such shit for so fucking long after we split… I honestly thought getting married again was never an option for me. But now, Livvy and I are in a good place, and we're both here for Poppy. Haven… well, I couldn't function without her."

A slow smile crosses his face, and he stands from his chair, beginning to pace the room. "Livvy was like the trial run, to show me what not to do, but it was good because I got Poppy and one of my best friends in Livvy to help me raise our daughter. But with Haven, it's like she's the missing piece of my very complicated puzzle. Though, when she's with me, everything feels… complete."

His words instantly hit me, and I can't stop myself from remembering…

Lying in the backyard on the freshly cut grass, the smell of it always made my nose a little itchy, but Bea loved it. She loved being with nature. She said it was good for the soul. So as we lay in my yard, me on my back, her nestled in against my chest, we stared up at the stars. The night sky was a beautiful shade of onyx, not a cloud in the sky, allowing the stars to shine brightly just for her.

"I wish every night could be this magical," she whispered.

Smiling, I leaned in, pressing my lips to the top of her head. "Any night with you is magical, Bea."

She pushed up on her elbow, peering down at me. "Smooth talker," she chimed, then leaned down, pressing her lips to mine.

My fingers slid up into the back of her hair, holding her to me as our tongues collided. We were becoming reckless. Out in the open like this, my parents could see us, or if Theo happened to peer over the back fence, we would definitely be busted, but at that moment, we simply didn't care.

I wanted to tell her brother about us, but he had told me in no uncertain terms was I to go near his sister. Theo was my best friend, and I didn't want to risk losing him. Or losing Bea. They both meant so much to me.

But this secret was beginning to grate on me.

I wanted to show her off to the world.

Tell everyone she was mine.

Slowly pulling back from Bea, my fingers gently caressed the side of her face as I stared into her eyes. "I think we should tell Theo about us."

A clear look of panic washed over her face as she rushed to sit up. "Alex, that's a crazy idea. He'll go mad. You know he has this stupid rule about you and me."

"Bea, I want to show you off. All this hiding was fun, to begin with, but it's been a couple of years now. I fucking love you, Bea. How are we supposed to have a serious relationship if we have to hide it forever?"

Her eyes began to water, and she bit down on her bottom lip. Then, just as she was about to reply, the back door of her house swung open, capturing both of our attention.

"Bea, you out here?" Theo called.

We split apart like we had been caught, even though he couldn't see us with the fence in the way. Bea stood up instantly and started rushing for the gate. Our conversation was over. But it certainly wasn't the last time we were going to speak about it. Bea ran back home, leaving me sitting on the freshly cut grass that she loved so much, feeling like my missing puzzle piece was just out of reach.

When she was with me, I felt complete.

But there was always that one thing stopping that puzzle from truly coming together as one.

Alpha slumps back into his chair. The noise of the wheels screeching across the floor snaps me back into the here and now of the Chapel. My head swirls, my heart races as I continue to think of Bea.

She completed me.

It was just that everything else got in our way.

Then, the puzzle pieces fell apart into a jumbled mess that couldn't be put back together.

We never really had a chance.

The odds were stacked against us from the very start.

When I see how Alpha and Haven can make their relationship work so effortlessly with a complication thrown in like Livvy, it shows me how Bea and I, with our complication of Theo, was never going to work.

Because Bea was never going to give.

Maybe because she saw the man inside me, who I would eventually become the VP of Defiance MC. Maybe she was ashamed to be seen with me when all this time, I put it down to her not wanting to tell Theo. Plus, there was a whole pile of other shit that got in the way.

Alpha lets out a small chuckle, causing me to look back up at him with a raised brow. I shake my head and fake a smile. "Shit, yeah, sorry. I completely know what you mean. You and Haven just have it, brother. You're lucky, and you need to hang on to her. So, if you wanna marry her, Pres, then you lock it down."

He bangs his fist on the table. I honestly think it's the first time I have seen him this happy since Poppy was born.

"Fuck… I'm doing this, then?"

Laughing, I shrug. "You better make sure you get her the perfect ring because you know she will beat your ass if you get that shit wrong."

Alpha grins wide, pure joy beaming off him. "Damn, you're right. Okay, now we have my life figured out, we need to get on top of yours because I see what's happening with you, Loki."

Tilting my head, I furrow my brows. "What do you mean?"

"You're always on top of your game. Always hyper-focused. But ever since Bea showed up, you're zoning out midconversation. You have no clue what's going on half the time. Bro, you're all over the fucking place." Swallowing hard, I go to defend myself, but he continues, "I've let it slide because I know how much having an ex around can fuck with your head, but take it from me, Loki, I just settled my shit with Livvy, and it feels so fucking liberating. Whatever baggage you have with Bea, you guys need to deal with it. Because at the moment, with your head messed up, you're no good to any of us."

Scrubbing at my face with my hands, I let out a heavy sigh. "Fuck! I hear you. I swear, Pres, I'm gonna be more present. I'll go deal with Bea now. Figure out the shit with her app and get her out of the clubhouse. Once she's gone and I won't have to see her, I'll be fine."

Alpha raises his brow at me questionably. "The thing I wonder, though, Loki… why are you so messed up over her in the first place? If she means nothing to you, and you want her gone, then maybe you wouldn't be struggling so much to keep focused."

Huffing, I drop eye contact because I know he's right, and I honestly can't look him in the eyes and deny it.

I want Bea here.

More than anything.

I want to walk into my bedroom every night and see her naked in bed, waiting for me.

I want to walk out into the clubroom to see her wearing my property patch.

I want to be able to call her my Old Lady.

I have wanted all these things for years.

I've dreamed of it.

Desired it.

Pleaded with any god out there who would listen for it to come true.

But I know it won't.

It can't.

We're just not destined like that.

"Maybe you're right, Alpha… maybe I do want her here. Maybe I always have, but there's too much trauma between us. Too much history."

Alpha exhales, rolling his shoulders. "In that case, she came here asking for help with her app. Maybe the best thing you can do now is go and do just that. Get it done, rip it off like a Band-Aid. Then let the wound heal when she's gone."

Groaning, I run my fingers through my hair, messing up my damn manbun. "Okay, I'll help fix her app, get her the hell out of here, and then tonight, we celebrate our win and me getting Bea out of my life… for good."

Alpha chuckles. "Sounds like a plan to me."

My stomach swirls in uncertainty as I stand. But I know the only way I'm going to be able to be the kind of VP I need to be for this club is to get Bea the hell away from me. "Guess I'm gonna go find her and get this done."

Alpha tilts his head. "Just so you know, now all the options are placed on the table if, for some reason, you decide that Bea should stick around… I'm on board with that too."

Huffing out my frustration, I storm toward the exit. "Not. Helping. Pres."

He doesn't even bother to hold back his laughter as I begin down the stairs, my feet pounding each step, trying to stomp out my frustration.

We've had a hell of a day.

I don't need any more chaos to add to it.

I want to deal with Bea, get her the fuck out of here, and then drink the night away until I pass the hell out.

As I step into the clubroom, I glance around, searching for Bea and spot her with Clover and Wes. I take a deep breath and walk over to them, overhearing Clover as she questions Wes about club life, while jotting down notes in her notebook. My brows knit together as I reach them, and I stand beside Bea without a word, just listening.

"So, transitioning from the Steel Serpents to Defiance was easy for you?" Clover asks.

Wes glances up at me, now appearing less relaxed to answer questions, seeing me here, so I signal for him to answer her.

He clears his throat and nods. "I mean… yeah. Being a prospect for the Serpents was fucking horrific. Those guys were animals. But coming over to Defiance was honestly the best thing that ever happened to me. I'm here with my sister, I'm being trained by the best brothers in the business, and the people here are…" his eyes wander up and down Clover a little too obviously, "… really great to hang out with."

Clover draws her lips in by her teeth and giggles like a schoolgirl.

Good god! I roll my eyes as Bea grins, slowly glancing up at me. Clearing my throat, I lift my chin. "If I'm making being a prospect too easy on you, Wes, then maybe I need to intensify your duties?"

Clover widens her eyes like she's horrified her questions could lead to more work for Wes, but like the great prospect he is, he sits taller with a bright smile. "I'll do anything you want me to, VP. Just let me know when and where. I'll be there."

Bea scowls, shaking her head, turning from me back to face Clover like she's disappointed I would do such a thing. But that's my job—to train the prospects.

I flare my nostrils and dip my chin. "Tomorrow morning, first thing, I want you on duty. I have a feeling it's gonna get messy around here. We need someone who can function. Get Hayes on it with you. There'll be shit to clean up, so be prepared."

Wes gives me a thumbs-up. "You got it, VP."

Bea turns to me, crossing her arms. "Do you get some kind of power trip from ordering people around?"

Clover and Wes both widen their eyes and quickly look away.

I rub the back of my neck, exhaling in frustration. "It's my job, Bea."

She laughs mockingly. " Really? Because it looks like you're being your usual grumpy self and taking it out on an innocent victim."

Clover snickers under her breath as Wes clears his throat. He's about to speak, but I hold up my hand to stop him. "Don't say a fucking word, Prospect."

He shrinks back, furrowing his brows.

Bea scoffs and stands, shaking her head before she starts to walk off. "You're unbelievable," she mumbles.

My insides tremble, ready to explode as I go after her. Sweat trickles down my temple when I catch up, my face burning with the intensity of my rage. I grab her wrist, pulling her back to face me. Her eyes widen as I stop and then push her against the nearest wall. Her breath catches as I pin her there, snapping her wrist up beside her head, my body pressed against hers.

Our eyes lock.

Our breathing is rapid as I glare at her with vicious intent.

"You ever, ever talk like that to me in front of a Prospect—"

"You'll what, Alex?" she snaps back, interrupting me.

I can't seem to find my breath, let alone any words.

The air around us ignites as I try to fight the urge to slam my lips to hers.

Desire.

Agony.

Torment.

Longing.

Everything swirls through me at once, at an uncontrollable rate.

My eyes drop to her supple lips—so tempting, so inviting.

Fuck.

Her breasts heave with the adrenaline surging through her. She draws her bottom lip in with her teeth, the sight of my undoing, and I can't fight it any longer. I lean in, desperate to kiss her. Bea's breath hitches, her eyes closing as she presses forward, her lips parting, granting me access. Surging forward, I feel her breath against my lips. A low growl escapes me. My fingers clench in her hair and—

"Hey, is Bea here?" A voice breaks through the noise just before our lips touch, and instantly, we heave apart at the unmistakable sound of Theo's voice.

I move with the speed of an immortal, my back flying against the opposite wall, like something you would see in a supernatural movie. My breathing is rapid I can barely catch it as Bea's hand races to her mouth, mourning the loss of a kiss almost shared.

Our eyes meet, hers glistening as she swallows hard, then she straightens out her clothes and ducks out of the hall.

"I'm here, Theo," she calls, a slight waver in her voice.

And here I am again, back in the same hell.

Hello, my old friend.