Chapter Eighteen

"Luca!" I call out softly as he walks away, unable to say anything more to change his mind.

My legs are stuck, I can't move. Until I hear the loud thump as he enters his room. I jump, and that's my cue to leave before things get even more out of control.

I silently curse Grazia for not letting me handle this situation. It all looks so much worse from her point of view, and now I'm not sure how I'll ever get Luca to listen to me.

"Give me my phone, now." Grazia looks at me with a cold expression, holding her hand out for her phone. I hand it to her and walk to the front door.

I take one more look up at the stairs before I leave, hoping to catch a glimpse of Luca. Will he forgive me? Can he really just cut his child and the mother of his firstborn baby out of his life?

I really fucked up this time. And I'm not even sure where that started. Was it by having the conversation with my father? Was it by getting pregnant in the first place? Or should I have just kept my pinky promise with Grazia and not fucked her brother—that's probably it.

But Luca was more than just some guy I had sex with. There had always been a deeper connection there, even if neither of us really saw it until now.

He had always been protective over me and I had always been willing to listen to him when things weren't going his way. But, things had gone further than either of us were expecting.

I hadn't realized how deep his feelings for me actually were. He hadn't done the best job of showing me how he felt. I wasn't even aware that Luca Baldini had it in him to fall for anyone, but it does make me happy that it's me he chose to fall in love with.

I just know that when he's straightened out his thoughts, he'll come around and together, we will raise this baby and be a family.

If he's already fallen in love with me, then my dreams of our family might just be attainable.

He admitted that he loves me in front of his sister, and that's not the kind of feeling that just goes away. It doesn't.

I have him, his heart, his baby.

I know that we can make things work and start our own family. I just need to give him space to think. Maybe the thought of the baby was too big of a shock, and once he fully processes what this means for him, for the family, he'll come looking for me.

I get in my Bentley and drive home, my mind in so many different places, I barely even register the roads that I pass.

My father is standing in the kitchen when I walk into the house. He's smiling at me as I walk in. He looks confused by my tear-stained face.

"Em, did you not speak to Luca today? Why the tears?" He asks me, coming in to give me a hug. I sob into his chest, then step back and wipe my eyes on my sleeve.

"I did, Dad. I spoke to him…But Grazia got to him first. She told him that I used the family and got pregnant to trap him." I take a breath to stop the tears from falling.

"He was so angry. I've never seen Luca that angry before, except maybe when he's dealing with other families. But not with me…"

The sobs come again, harder, and the pain in my chest forces me to sit down at the table.

"But…" My father sounds even more confused, and I really don't know why—he was here when Grazia heard us talking, he knew that this wasn't good for either of us.

"Luca didn't propose?" He asks, and now it's my turn to look confused.

"Propose?" I wipe my eyes again and squint at my father, wondering if he's hit the whiskey a bit too early today. Sometimes he does that, and then fantasies can seem real to him.

"He came here…Luca…not too long ago, actually, about an hour ago…to ask for my blessing. I, of course, gave it to him! There is nothing that will cause me to say no to Luca Baldini asking me if he may marry my daughter. And I know it's something that will make you happy too. He said he was going to give you his grandmother's ring. Then he left to look for you. He said he hadn't seen you or Grazia today. Tell me you didn't turn him down, Emelia."

Luca was going to propose? Is that why he had looked so heartbroken at the mansion? I'm impressed that he came all the way here to ask for my father's blessing.

A man like Luca is usually very good at taking what he wants, but his gesture in asking for my hand before he proposed shows me that he's still the gentleman that I grew up with.

"I didn't turn him down, Dad. I'm carrying his baby. Of course I would have said yes! But he didn't get the chance to ask me. As soon as he walked into the mansion, Grazia hit him with her version of what she had heard, and he exploded. He's so angry."

Luca's angry face was etched into my mind. I hated seeing him upset, but him being angry with me cut deeper than anything I'd ever felt before.

I want to fix this, but I have no idea how.

I think about Luca, planning this proposal, and then hearing about what his sister called my "master plan". Of course he was angry. Ginny had always said that she didn't believe Luca would ever allow himself to love anyone enough to get married. She believed he was much too guarded, and that his head was too deep in his business to allow him the time or energy to find a wife.

That might have been true, but Luca and I had bonded over his business. I didn't care if he came home late or spent the majority of his time with me looking at his phone.

I know how important it all is to him, and I suspect that's why he found it so easy to spend his time with me.

We had even had the time to speak about what we each hoped for in our futures, and our plans looked so similar. Of course, it makes sense that marriage would be the next step.

My mind is racing. Luca was ready to marry me, before he even knew about the baby, so surely he'd be even more ready after learning that we were about to bring a brand new life into the world?

If only Grazia had let me tell him, we could be planning our wedding–and our future–right now. Instead, we're not speaking.

He had also told me today that he loved me. Had he ever said that to another girl? According to Ginny, the answer was no.

I think about all of the time I have spent with Luca since Ginny's passing, and how much we had shared with each other. It has become so easy to be with him.

His intelligence came out when he spoke, especially when he talked about his work and his plans for the business. As violent as the business could be, he had ideas that could help it be less violent and dangerous, and even more profitable.

I go up to my room, telling my father that I need some time to think on my own. I"m pacing in the room, feeling a mix of awe and confusion. Luca, the guy I thought had a heart of stone, has fallen for me.

It"s kind of blowing my mind, and I"m realizing the walls I put up around my feelings weren"t as sturdy as I thought.

"He"s into me...Luca"s really into me," I mumble to myself, letting the reality of it sink in.

I always saw him as an emotionless dude, the one Ginny swore would never catch real feelings for anyone. Now, I"m standing here, rethinking everything.

As I wrap my head around it, I"m forced to admit something I"ve been trying to ignore–I"m in love with Luca.

It's so much more than simply wanting to join forces and become unstoppable. It"s even more than wanting to create the perfect specimens with our children, which I am fully convinced we will do.

I love him deeply.

My whole logic, my defense mechanism of treating it all like some game, feels like it"s crumbling. It worked well until it didn"t, and now here I am, caught up in something deeper than I planned.

Now, I"ve got this primal urge to make things right with Luca. I want him to see that my initial reasons were all messed up, that it isn"t some game for me anymore.

It is genuine, and I"m ready to own that.

"I need to fix this. Show him it was all a screw-up, a big misunderstanding," I say to my reflection in the mirror, my emerald, green gaze staring back at me. The decision is made, I need to smooth over the mess I"ve made between us.

It's important for me, for Luca, but more importantly, for this baby, who deserves to grow up knowing the love of his entire family. And that includes the Baldinis, even if the thought doesn't quite make any of them joyful right now.

I think about how I can tell Luca how I feel and how I can make him believe me, how to show him the truth after he's lost all faith in what I say.

I also need to do something about the rift that has come between Grazia and myself, but that will have to happen after Luca forgives me. She and I could come back from anything, I'm sure, and if her brother accepts me into the family, then she's more likely to be willing to do the same.

She always said she wished we"d been born sisters, I guess I"ll find out if that is really true or not.

What started as a game to me has turned into something real, and I want him to get that. I have no more ulterior motives except to be his wife and stand by his side as he navigates his business.

"I"m proud of him and everything he's done with this deal. I know I can help him do even more. I want our families to be closer. This baby is such a blessing. Maybe if I make him see that, he"ll get it, and he'll be ready to propose again," I murmur to myself, almost unhinged, determined to figure out a way to make Luca understand the mess of feelings I"ve gotten myself into.