Chapter Ten

Kyle

Fuck, I've got to stop second-guessing myself. Of course, he'll come. But I can't get rid of the quivery feeling in the pit of my stomach as I sit in the dimly lit cellar bar waiting for Axel to arrive.

My mind drifts to the incredible day we spent together in Lifou on a private tour that Axel arranged. The crystal-clear turquoise water and white sandy beaches straight from a postcard, the cliffs with their breathtaking views of the crashing waves, and the historical chapel. We explored it all, laughing and talking like old friends. It was a magical day in an idyllic location.

Soft jazz music plays in the background, mingling with the clink of glasses and the murmur of hushed conversations. I flip through the wine list for the hundredth time as I wait. Then I look up and there he is at the doorway. He looks amazing in a classic maroon collared shirt with dark jeans. My breath catches as I drink in the sight of him, his hair pulled back accentuating his chiseled features and his dark eyes finally landing on me and sending a shiver down my spine. Rising from the booth, I make my way over, pulse quickening with each step.

"Hey, you," I say softly, knowing I'm smiling. "You look amazing."

Axel grins, pulling me into a warm hug. "Thanks. You clean up pretty well yourself, farm boy." His voice is low and husky, igniting a spark low in my belly.

"Um, yeah, thanks." I know I look ordinary, especially compared to Axel's on-trend look, but I accept the compliment anyway. I indicate the booth and lead him back to the secluded alcove. We slide into the soft leather seats, knees brushing under the table. An electric candle flickers on the dark wood tabletop, casting a warm glow. The ambiance is intimate and romantic.

I can hardly believe I'm here with him. As I gaze into his eyes, I feel the flickering of something special. He's captured my interest so completely and unexpectedly. I want to move onto the seat beside him and feel the heat of his body, I want to take his face between my hands and press my lips to his. I want… I want whatever he'll offer me.

Before I'm tempted to climb across the table and throw myself at him, I reach for the leather-bound wine list. "What are you in the mood for? White? Red? Or something different?" I ask, glancing up at him.

He leans in, forearms on the table and peers at the list for a blink or two before sitting back. "I'll defer to the expert here. How about you surprise me with something special?"

After a day where Axel surprised me with the private tour and I didn't need to make a single decision, warmth blooms in my chest at his trust, and the opportunity to show him some of my world. I flag down the sommelier and order a couple of glasses of sangiovese from Tuscany. Later I'll show him one from my local area.

As we wait for our wine, I find myself talking about life on the vineyard. "My brother John and I run the family property together. We outsource our wine production to a local winemaker, but we're still very involved in the process. My family has been tending the same vines for generations. There's something magical about nurturing the land, watching the fruit ripen under the sun. We grow sangiovese among other things, so I thought it would be fun to try one from Italy."

Axel listens intently, his gaze never leaving mine, asking thoughtful questions about the different grape varieties, and the challenges of winemaking. I love how he shows an interest in every word.

Our wine arrives and we each take a glass, the garnet liquid catching the candlelight as we bring the glasses together.

"To new beginnings," Axel says.

I flush at his words. God, I hope this is the beginning of something. I push aside the thought that our friendship is destined to only last days. "To new beginnings."

The wine is delicious. A rich, earthy vintage.

"Kyle, this is incredible," Axel says. "Not that I know much about wine, but you've chosen well."

A blush warms my cheeks and I chuckle. "Thanks. I'd like to think my wine experience has translated well to my palate."

"Tell me more. How do you make a good wine?"

"Growing grapes and making wine is a combination of science and art. Figuring out which grapes will thrive in certain soils, when to harvest to ensure the best possible result…" I lose myself in talk of terroir and tannins, enjoying sharing my world.

Axel holds out his glass and swirls the liquid. "So you make this type of wine?"

"Sangiovese, yes. But ours tend to be a little fruitier than the Italian style that tend to have more acid and tannins. Let's try one and you can see the difference."

The conversation flows as easily as the wine as I answer Axel's winemaking questions but as we sip our second glass of wine, the conversation takes a more personal turn.

"So you said it's a family business? That you work with your brother?" Axel says.

"My dad passed away a few years ago from a heart attack." My voice catches slightly. It still feels like yesterday and I miss his presence in my life. "Dad was a big man, in size and personality. It was a shock to lose him. And my mum… she died when I was born, so I never really knew her. So it's just been me and John running the farm ever since."

Axel reaches across the table, his hand covering mine. "I'm so sorry, Kyle. That must have been incredibly tough, losing your parents like that."

I take comfort from the touch, and nod, blinking back the sudden burning behind my eyes. "It was. But John… he's been my rock. I don't know what I would've done without him."

"I can relate to the no parents thing," Axel says quietly. "My upbringing was pretty broken. Dad abandoned us when I was just a kid, and my mum… she turned to drugs to cope."

"Jesus!" My heart clenches at the pain in his voice. I turn my hand beneath his, interlacing our fingers in a silent show of support.

"And then there's my little brother, Rick," Axel continues, his jaw tightening. "He's only eighteen, but he's already following in our mother's footsteps. We never even found out who his father is. I've tried to be there for him, to guide him, but… he's in rehab now. I just hope it's enough."

"Hey," I say softly, squeezing his hand. "Rick is lucky to have you, Axel. Believe me, having a brother who cares, who's willing to fight for you… it makes all the difference."

His eyes meet mine. "Thanks. I really needed to hear that."

He offers a small smile and sits back in his seat, breaking contact. I miss his touch immediately. As I look at him, his chiseled features softened by the candlelight, I feel a surge of protectiveness, a desire to shield him from any more pain. To be his rock, just as John has been for me, because I sense he needs someone to be there for him.

Axel takes a sip of his wine, then sets the glass down, his fingers drumming against the stem. "You know, being there for Rick… it's been tough. Especially with my career."

My brow furrows. "What do you mean?"

He sighs, leaning back in the booth. "The constant travel, the performances, the studio time… it's hard to balance it all. There have been times when I've had to choose between being there for my brother and fulfilling my professional obligations."

As I listen to what he's saying it dawns on me that maybe I've not really grasped the extent of his fame and success. "Axel," I say slowly, "just how famous are you?"

A smile tugs at his lips. "You really don't know, do you?"

I shake my head slowly. "I'm sorry, I'm not really up to date with popular music. I'm more of a country music guy myself."

Axel chuckles, his eyes sparkling with amusement. "Well, let's just say my last album went platinum. And my number one hit, ‘Shattered Heart'… it topped the charts for months."

Shattered Heart? Oh my God, even I've heard of that one!

My jaw drops. I'm sitting here with a real life rock star, and I had no idea.

However as I gaze at him and see a flash of fear in his eyes, I realise that none of that matters. Fame, success, the glitz and glamour… it's all superficial, and it's got nothing to do with the man sitting across from me—the man who's sees something in me where others don't, the man who shows a genuine interest in me, who's protected me. The man who's shared his struggles, who, despite his celebrity status, is still just a person, longing for connection and understanding. Axel is what matters most.

"Congratulations. I'll admit that even I've heard of ‘Shattered Heart.' I guess I'll have to give it more of a listen now I know it's one of your songs. But don't expect me to become a pop music convert overnight. I'm a country boy through and through," I say, trying to lighten the mood.

Axel tosses his head back and laughs, the sound rich and warm. "Fair enough. And who knows? Maybe I'll write a country song just for you."

I grin, my heart fluttering at the thought. "I'd like that, Axel. I'd like that a lot."

We have one more glass of wine, this time a shiraz, and conversation turns to reminiscing about our day of sightseeing. Eventually we rise from the booth, and make our way out of the cellar bar, and into the tiled lobby. The lights are brighter out here, and people are walking in all directions, making their way to the various venues on board.

We walk side by side, our shoulders nearly touching. I notice a few glances directed our way, curious eyes lingering on Axel. I've not noticed people staring before but maybe I just wasn't looking. Axel appears different now from how he was last night when he was wearing more edgy clothes and his hair was loose and eyeliner surrounded his eyes, but obviously not so different that his fans don't recognise him. A group of young women huddle together, whispering as they point their iPhones in our direction, attempting to snap photos.

Axel seems unfazed by the attention, his pace never faltering, but I wonder how he manages to maintain his privacy in the face of such constant recognition. As if sensing my thoughts, he leans in close, his breath warm against my ear. "You get used to it," he says, "but it's never easy, always being in the spotlight."

"I can't imagine living like that," I say keeping my voice low. "Being scrutinised, every moment captured by cameras."

"I'm lucky. Most of the time when I'm out and about I'm left alone. It seems most people just want to catch a glimpse or a photo. Sometimes they approach for a selfie. But after a performance? It's as if all bets are off, so I need security to keep the fans away. That's why moments like these are so precious to me. Moments where I can just be myself, without the glare of the media."

We step out onto the top deck intending to get some fresh air but it's party central out here. There are people everywhere. The pool is full, the hot tubs crammed, and scantily dressed people are dancing under the stars to eighties pop.

Axel turns to me. "Would you like to come back to my suite? I'm starving. We could order some room service, maybe continue our conversation?"

I nod. I'm definitely not ready for the night to end. "I'd like that."