Chapter 39

Islipped from the house. Would anyone notice that I was gone? I'd stolen the keys to my parent's house off of Drew's key ring and my heart pounded as I climbed onto my bike. I hadn't stepped foot in the place for years, but the need to see it again was overpowering today.

The wind whipped past me as my feet peddled faster. If I didn't get there quickly, I'd lose my nerve. It didn't stop the ache in my chest from spreading, the burn in my eyes from becoming too much as tears trailed down my cheeks. If anyone thought I looked crazy, they didn't bother me. Everyone around here knew me, and if they realized what direction I was headed in, it would all make sense. I didnt go beyond the main part of town often.

Sweat trickled down my back when my bike skidded to a halt in front of the two-story craftsman-style home. The white paint still looked pristine and the blue trim looked just like Dad had painted it last summer. It didn't look like a house that hadn't been lived in for years, and I had Drew to thank for that.

My hands shook as I approached the front door. I was immediately thrown into the past. The upkeep of the house had me fooled that at any moment the old Subaru would pull into the driveway and Mom and Dad would get out and give me a hug. That the last few years I'd spent without them were all in my imagination.

The longer I stood there, the more reality washed over me again. That driveway would remain empty unless I approved Drew to start renting the place—or I bought it back from him.

As much as I loved this house, it wasn't mine anymore. It anchored me to a town that didn't hold my future. Nathan held my destiny. And with the decision I'd made... It was time to move on.

The click of the lock was cathartic. My mind still attempted to play tricks on me when I entered the living room. A plush couch sat in front of a small wooden coffee table. There were lamps on both ends of the couch and I remembered so many nights snuggled there, watching a movie after finishing my homework, thinking of summers and waiting for the boy who'd opened up so many possibilities to me.

It was a living time capsule. Nothing inside had changed. The fridge had no food, but all of our old furniture was still there. The pictures remained on the wall, staring at my past and happier days. I wiped more tears from my eyes at the image of my parents with their arms around me. I had to have been about ten in the picture and I hadn't looked happy, but my parents had. I had been their entire world.

I took the frame off of the wall and kept walking through the house, reliving so many memories as my heart ached. This was supposed to be healing, but instead I felt worse.

My bedroom was the breaking point. The gray comforter was still rumpled as if I'd crawled out of bed that morning and not years ago. I sat on the corner of the mattress and pressed the photo to my chest.

I hadnt been emotional like this since my parents had died. But it felt good to let them go.

"Mom. Dad. I think it's finally time." I choked on the words, gripping the photo tighter. My throat fought to close off and keep them inside.

"I can't hold on to you guys forever like this. You deserve to be free, just like I do. I've punished Nathan enough, and... I love him. I want to give him my future and I know you would have loved that. You guys always loved him."

I wiped some more tears away as I smiled at the thought. "I loved our home, but I need to let it go. And I know that you'd understand."

The picture was heavy in my palms as I looked at it one more time. A few stray tears landed on the glass before I placed it on my old pillow and stood. This room wasn't mine. Not anymore. Maybe it would make some other little boy or girl happy one day. This home deserved a family and to be filled with love. It didn't need to stand and be a memory of so much loss.

"Where did you go?"

My heart pounded for a whole different reason when the camper door closed behind me. I clutched at my chest, then pulled my hat from my head, and threw it onto the counter.

"There was something important that I needed to do."

Nathan stared at me skeptically. "You're acting like you're guilty of something."

I cleared my throat and pulled the keys from my pocket, dangling them in the air. "Maybe because it required me to steal some keys from your uncle."

"No shit?" Nathan crossed the camper and pulled them from my hand. "What are these keys for?"

One look at my red-rimmed eyes was all Nathan needed before his whole body softened. His hand reached to thread through my hair and pull me into a soft kiss. Usually, nothing stayed soft between us for very long, but in the moment it felt significant that things didn't switch to something heated right away.

"I could have gone with you, you know."

I nodded when he released me and I collapsed into one of the booth seats at my table. "I appreciate that, but this was something I needed to do by myself."

He nodded and watched me for a moment. Oreo jumped from the bed and trotted over to jump into my lap. Her purrs set me further at ease, and I scratched behind her ears before petting her silken fur.

After a few prolonged moments of silence, I found the strength to tell him what had happened. "I think it's time I let go of the house. I know I've spent the last few years trying to get it back..."

"You know he would have handed it over had you asked."

I stared at Nathan. Part of me knew that. The stubborn part of me wanted to earn it back. But it was also good that I'd never asked because I'd be stuck here if I had.

"But it's your family home."

I shook my head. "It's a family home, but it's not mine anymore. You're my home." At that, the sappy part of me was choking up all over again.

Nathan smiled warmly as he slid into the seat next to me. Oreo knew when she was in the middle of something she didn't need to be and hopped away. His hands threaded through my hair again. The feel of his fingers massaging my scalp was comforting, but didn't feel nearly as good as his mouth slanting over mine.

I moaned into the kiss as I wrapped my arms over his shoulders. The move was awkward in the cramped space, but I needed to be closer to him. My Nathan. My everything.

Nathan backed out of the seat and pulled me with him. We stumbled our way to the bed, clothes falling around us the entire way. I wanted to feel him, touch him, savor every last thing about him.

"What do you need, baby?" he asked as he trailed kisses across my neck and shoulder.

My entire body was a puddle of goo below him. "You. Mark me. Fuck me. Make love to me. Make me yours in all ways possible."

Nathan growled as his teeth sank into the soft skin around my nipple. I hissed and lifted off the bed. Pain wasn't our thing, but that had felt amazing. He sucked at the flesh until the skin was bruised and he continued a path down my chest like he was on a mission. My entire upper-body was painted with his marks by the time he reached my straining dick.

"Oh fuck, baby. You look so damn pretty like that. Want to take a damn picture and remember you like this always."

I'd let him do it, but before I could tell him that, my cock disappeared into his throat. God, he was good at worshiping my body and making it sing. My toes curled as he slurped around my length, his tongue drawing lazy patterns as he bobbed his head up and down.

Nathan released my cock with a soft pop and immediately started jacking me. He reached under my pillow for the bottle of lube. The poor thing was almost empty at this point because we'd used so damn much of it over the last several weeks. He must have realized what I had, because when he opened the cap, his words made a shiver race through me. "You're such a needy little slut that we're going to need to buy more of this."

The cool liquid made me jump as he upturned the bottle and drizzled it over my cock and continued to jack me. It poured over his fingers and over my balls, sliding all the way down and dripping onto the sheets beneath us. It was way more than what we needed, but I didn't care. It was hot as hell, but not nearly as hot as his free hand dragging through the liquid and the feel of him shoving two digits into my clenching hole.

"Fuck." My eyes pinched closed at the sudden intrusion, but I didn't fight it.

"You've got this, baby. Be a good boy and let my fingers in."

My breath rushed from my lungs as he shoved them in hard again, pegging my prostate. I saw stars and whimpered, fucking myself on the digits that were lodged in my ass.

The sensation of Nathan's hand around my cock and his fingers inside of me was about to send me over the edge and if he didn't slow down, I would blow my load soon. I pleaded with my eyes because he'd made it difficult for me to speak. My body was engulfed, swarmed with emotion and all I longed for was the release only he could offer me.

"Need your cock."

Nathan's smirk bordered on evil as those naughty fingers found their way outside of my body again. The empty feeling was horrible. I was desperate to be filled. And, thank fuck, I didn't have to wait long because Nathan coated himself with the remainder of the lube and shoved his dick home.

My back bowed from the bed. "Yes. Fuck yes."

"That's my good boy. Taking it so well. Always so well."

I cried out as he thrust into me again and again. This was our lovemaking. This was us. I didn't expect anything less from him and prayed it would always be like this.

"Going to come," I panted, my hand wrapping around his on my erection.

I was in shock when he shook my grip away and pulled out. My body froze at the sudden stop. "Not yet," he said as his hands grasped my hips and flipped me over.

Fuck, to be manhandled by him like that…

And just like that, Nathan was inside me again, fucking me without hesitation.