24. It’s Not Me

Chapter 24

It’s Not Me

Megan

“ T here’s no peace in prison, you weak little cunt,” Samuel hisses. “You won’t survive it.“

“I’ll survive,” I promise him, with my finger still firmly on the trigger of the gun. “Trust me. Prison will be a cakewalk compared to the life I led in your house of horrors.”

“Megan–” Rachel suddenly tries to reason with me.

“Quiet!” I hiss. “You two, sit on the floor next to Samuel.”

Adrenaline is pumping through my veins, and my brain is working on overdrive. I know I need to calm down and search for reason, but the more I glare at each of their ugly faces, the more I realize that I don’t want a reasonable ending to this.

I want them to suffer.

Running away from my horrible family was never the answer. If being with Hunter has taught me anything, it’s that. They’ll never be better people. The only thing they understand is pain, which is why they need to go through everything I have and worse.

“You’re crazy, just like your mother,” Samuel says.

“I told you that you should have made her have an abortion,” Veronica says in an I told you kind of voice.

“Shut up!” I point the gun at her forehead. “This one is for making me drink your piss when I was four!”

The memory of a terrified child retching in horror is playing in my head like a clip from an old television show.

Suddenly, the gun goes off, but I’m not sure if I’m the one who made the shot or if it was someone else. I’m having something tantamount to an out-of-body experience.

Veronica’s scream barely registers to my ears as she stumbles to the ground, clutching her knee. I’m confused. I know I had the gun pointed at her head, but why is her knee bleeding?

My eyes are wet, and I’m shaking, but when Samuel lunges for me, I suddenly get clear as hell and aim the gun directly at his balls.

“Stop right there!”

He freezes in place as I ignore Veronica’s painful howls and Rachel’s frightened cries.

“You were supposed to protect me,” I tell Samuel. Spit flies out of my mouth as I curse at him. “You were my fucking father.”

He doesn’t flinch, his hatred for me simmering like a stew in his eyes.

“You deserved it,” he says. “You deserved worse.”

“Why?” I can’t hide the agony in my voice as I try to steady my hold on the gun, tears streaming down my face.

“Your drug addict of a mother was fooling herself and thought she could trap me. She actually believed she could be my wife,” he scoffs.

“You should have helped her.”

“I told her I didn’t want a baby. I told her that she should get rid of you. I even made her an appointment at the clinic, which she purposely missed, and then saddled me with a baby. I didn’t want to keep us together.” Spittle is flying out of his mouth, his eyes crazed. “But nobody controls me! So I told her that she’d live to regret it, and as you know, Megan, I don’t make any promises that I don’t keep. I promised her that I was going to sell you off as soon as you got your period, the same way I sold her delusional ass off. But since child protective services had their eyes on me, I had to adjust my plan and keep you around longer.”

His words are laced with pure evil, and they penetrate something soft inside of me. He’s never explained his hatred for me with words before, only with physical force. No matter how much I hated Samuel, for some reason, I always thought that he was cruel because of some defect of mine. But now I understand…it’s not me… it’s him. It’s them.

It’s not me.

“I see,” I say firmly, thinking about how he probably pawned my mother off to some other drug addict for a hundred bucks. “Then your death will be me doing the world a fucking favor. I mean, I’ve already killed once, right? What’s a few more times?”

I remember Hunter’s words and aim the gun at the largest part of Samuel’s body, his middle-aged gut. I’m debating whether or not to pull the trigger when, out of nowhere, I hear Hunter’s voice, “I think that’s enough, Megan. Put the gun down.”

My eyes dart over to where he’s standing in the room. Lars and Parker flank either side of him. I look from him to Lars, remembering what the older man had once told me in the bathroom as he had tried to comfort me. He had spoken of his daughter so lovingly.

My eyes flicker back to Samuel, who’s looking over his shoulder at them.

Why did I come into the world in such an ugly way? Why couldn’t I be loved like that? Why couldn’t someone love me like that?

My insides feel numb as I stare at Lars, feeling an irrational jealousy of the daughter he lost. I don’t realize that I’m crying until I feel the wetness on my cheeks.

It hurts so much.

It’s like someone is ripping my heart to shreds, and I can’t stand it.

Hunter moves toward me, and Samuel says in a grateful tone, “Thank God someone is here. She’s lost her mind. She was trying to kill-“

Hunter silences Samuel by punching him in the mouth, making him stumble back.

“Dad!” Rachel screams, then turns to Hunter. “What are you doing? She’s the one who attacked us!”

“Get her out of here,” Hunter orders Parker while Lars wraps his arm around my shoulders, taking the gun from me.

“I want to see.” I struggle with him, my tears still falling. “I want them to die!”

Hunter cups my face roughly, forcing me to meet his gaze. “That’s what you want?”

“Yes!” I plead.

He moves even closer, and I can smell his whiskey-laden breath as he speaks again.

“I will always give you want, Megan, but after what I heard, I think death is too easy. It’s the easy way out. If you trust me, then trust that I’ll make them suffer. They’ll answer for every tear they forced from you and for every bit of humiliation. I swear to you. Leave them to me, and I’ll get your revenge for you.”

Hunter and I have spent many erotic nights together, but the words he’s just said to me might just be the sexiest thing he’s ever said. While I may never have a father’s love, I’ve got something way better.

Hunter wonderful-ass Middleton.

“All three?”

“All of them, baby.”

“She’s a murderer!” Samuel pleads for mercy in a high-pitched voice. “Don’t listen to her lies. She killed her own boyfriend in cold blood!“

“Good for her.” Hunter looks down at him before kicking him swiftly in the groin. “Take her to my place, Lars, and make sure you and Parker secure this floor.”

Samuel’s story of what he did to my mother keeps spinning around in my head. He’s a monster, and I don’t want to leave until I see him being carried out of here in a body bag.

“Come on,” Lars says quietly. “I’ll take you upstairs.”

On our way to the elevator, we pass by Parker, who isn’t wearing his normal smile, as I exit the apartment.

“Where are you going?” Rachel screams after me. “Get back here, you bitch!”

Parker quickly wraps his hand around Rachel’s throat and forcibly seats her on her ass in the hallway. “Quiet.”

“Hand me my gloves, Parker,” I hear Hunter request icily, and just as the elevator doors close, I take one last look inside the open door of my apartment and see a look of panic spread across Samuel and Veronica's faces.

For once, in our toxic dynamic, they are the ones in fear for their lives.

Not me.

And as diabolical as I know it is, there's something about seeing them that way that sits well with my soul.

And finally, I exhale.