8. Angelina

Chapter 8

Angelina

The week before the full moon is wonderful. I may still have worries about other things like what being Williem's mate meant, and what the full moon's arrival would mean for me but I don't let it get me down for a single second.

I have decided to take each day at a time and that is exactly what I do.

Surprised but not worried when Jonathan asks to speak with me for a bit, I am stunned when the first thing he does is bring out an old photograph and shows me a beautiful woman who almost looks like me.

"This is who you remind me of. I had mentioned it to Williem, but I still had to do more digging before I could say anything to you."

"She is very beautiful, Jon. Is she a friend of yours?"

"Yes, in some ways she was the best of friends to me, I had at times wished we could be more, but it wasn't meant to be. In some ways I was a perfect friend to her too, but in others, I failed her." His face is lined with years of regret, and I want to hug him if that would take some of the pain away from his eyes.

"I'm so sorry to hear that, Jon. You can definitely reconcile with her. I'm sure she'll love to see you again." I say, intent on comforting him, but his next words just confuse me further.

"She is no longer living, but I want you to know her. I was just going to show you her picture, but then I got caught up. I wanted to know what had happened to her, so I took a picture of her and gave her name to Eric."

Eric is a sentinel who exists in his own world. He is as strong and fast as every other Lycan, but his interest lies in computers and everything digital.

Responsible for the satellite blind spots over this Territory, Eric was literally God's eye, capable of accessing cameras and records all over the world in conjunction with his pseudo lieutenants; the techies, as I call them in my head.

I still have no idea why Jon felt the need to tell me about his old flame but I let him talk. He has always been one of the kindest people to me, so if he wants to talk, you can bet I will listen.

"Did Eric find anything for you?" I ask, hoping that at the very least he finds something to give Jon closure.

I know how difficult it is to look for someone and get nothing back. I had searched for my birth parents for most of my adolescent and subsequent adult life.

"He did."

That should be great news, but Jon isn't happy. The dashingly handsome smile I know to be part Jonathan is absent. It doesn't bode well.

I don't know how Williem knows I am worried, but he is by my side in a flash. I am worried about Jon so it surprises me when he asks me to sit down instead.

Jon begins talking, and my world starts falling apart around me.

"Her name was Felicity, and she was the happiest and most beautiful woman I knew as a young man. A Lycan, she was breathtaking. This picture doesn't do her justice." Jon starts. "Your eyes are just like hers. She was your mother, Angelina."

Luke I am your father.

I snort at the thought that crosses my mind. I can see it startles Williem, making him eye me strangely, and confuses Jon. He must mistake my incoming mental breakdown with disbelief because he immediately starts explaining more to me.

I can barely pay attention to the individual words but the broad details of it stick to my mind.

She was a Lycan from a neighboring pack, formerly located in the next county.

Her entire family and pack were killed by a surge of rogues resulting from a solitary human community being attacked by an rogue who was more concerned with turning humans than killing them.

She fell in love with a human man, forbidden by her pack's rules, and was denied habitation because of the threat her human lover posed.

Living in a mostly human population, her new family is attacked by the same rogue pack, killing her and her husband. The only survivor being a premature baby in a hospital's neonatal intensive care unit.

Me.

It is the saddest tale I can imagine, and if I didn't know Jon wouldn't lie to me I would say it was sadistic, just to fuck with me.

"How did you know it was me?"

My only question confuses Jon a little bit more. Williem too. "What do you mean baby?" He asks.

"The baby. How do you know I am that baby?"

"The hospital records. They matched up with those of the orphanage you referenced when I asked where you grew up." Jon answers tentatively like he is scared to cause me pain.

He doesn't understand, and neither does Williem, the pain is already there, it has always been. He had just helped me see it for exactly what it was. This is the greatest kindness anyone could have done to me.

It is akin to handing someone who was troubled by a thorn a pair of tweezers and a flashlight after hours of pain.

"Thank you Jon. For going through all this stress to find this truth for me. Thank you."

He opens up his arms, and I lean into them, letting him hug me. He looks like he needs it more than I do, if only so he wouldn't feel sad for making me sad too.

"I want to go home." I turn to Williem, needing to just be with him, and just him.

Williem nods to Jon and almost carries me home to bed.

I sink into the mattress, completely unmotivated to do anything but stare at the ceiling in sadness. I think about what this means for me, and I remember something I had been thinking about for a while.

"I want to ask you for something Liem, and I want you to promise you will do it for me, no matter what."

"What is it Lina?"

"I want you to promise you'll end it for me. If I turn out to be a rogue, I want you to do it for me. Please don't think about it, don't wait, or try to see if anything will change. Just do it." I beg, staring despondently at the ceiling in contrast to my voice which is choked with emotion.

Williem rolls to face me, and I do the same. "Yes. I will end it for you. Quickly and painlessly, I will." His promise fills me with reassurance that if it all went to hell, I wouldn't hurt another person the way I have been hurt.

"Thank you." I whisper fervently, and I mean it.

"It will be okay baby. You'll see." Williem promises, trying his best to comfort me. But I don't want to be comforted. I want to forget.

"Kiss me." I want to lose myself in him so I wouldn't have to think about anything but the sensations he would make me feel.

Thankfully he doesn't refuse. Here and now, I know he would do anything I ask to make me happy. The thought of that warms me up and I can't help the half smile that curls on my face right before his lips touch mine.

I fell asleep to the thought that despite everything I had somehow found my way back to my roots. Poetic.

I wake up to a cold and empty room, knowing before my eyes open that Williem isn't here with me. I cannot smell him, and reaching out my hand on the bed doesn't bring me in contact with his skin.

Huffing in frustration, I roll over to his side of the bed, in hopes of luxuriating in the heat he would have left behind, but I find it cold. He must have left my side quite some time ago.

Where is he?

Opening my eyes, I can see moonlight streaming through the window, letting me know it is still night, or at least very early in the morning.

He must have gotten up to attend to something that couldn't wait, and like before, took care not to wake me in the process.

That is really sweet. But I want you with me Williem. I want my mate now!

I almost giggle at the thoughts in my head. Possessive and demanding, they were the kind of words I would expect to hear from Williem, and saying them, even if only in the confines of my head, felt like I was coming to enjoy having him as my mate.

Williem had the ability to make me forget about every other thing going wrong with my life.

Being bitten by him had changed the dynamic of our relationship on Williem's side, but I have no idea what it means for me.

He was even more possessive; something I had considered impossible. Considering the fact that I was half human, I don't know if it would change anything significant for me. All I can do is watch and wait.

Maybe this heightened need for his touch was the way my body reacted to it.

I knew what it was. I know he had marked me in the way Lycans marked their mates but it didn't make sense to me.

Alyssa had explained the implications of his bite, it was meant as a message to the unmated Lycans and all wolf-kind that I was taken. It was less of a physical mark, and more of a change in the way I smelled and looked to other Lycans. And it also strengthens our bond.

The thought of that makes me smile, Williem had marked me as his mate, now I smelled like him.

I stretch my T-shirt on, ready to go find him if he hasn't wandered far and convince him to come back to bed with me.

Walking to the patio I can see Lake and Williem seated on a stump talking. I strain my now superior hearing, hoping to catch their conversation.

It works!

I can hear it but it makes me wish I remained completely human, unable to believe what they are saying.

"I think I'd be happier if Sierra was my mate." Williem laughs. "Angelina is nothing like Sierra. She doesn't know anything about the way we live or what it means to be an alpha's mate…." Williem tells Lake.

Although I have acted like I didn't care about him enough to love him, I feel my heart break into a million pieces in that second.