4. Chapter Four

“Daniel, that looks fantastic.” He and I had come in early the last two mornings to paint the walls in the common area of the bar. Two were pretty much windows, so it hadn’t taken us very long. Step one of five thousand, but the more we did the less of a ding the budget took which left more funds for the upgrades we weren’t capable of tackling on our own.

“I know bars are ideally dark and dingy, but I have to say brightening the space up is so much better,” Daniel said as he proudly took in our hard work.

“Agreed, Daniel.” We’d chosen a color that wasn’t quite white nor brown. More of an earth tone. Had we brightened it too much our customers likely would’ve complained it hurt their eyes after a couple of drinks.

We had half a dozen tables out in storage in various stages of disrepair which I planned to tackle next or throw away and replace. “Let’s clean up.” Daniel and I had just enough time to get home and shower only to turn around and come right back to open the bar on time. Good thing neither of us had much of a social life. Every ceiling fan ran on high speed, and I brought in a couple of portable fans from home in the hopes the walls would dry fast.

“Looks good in here,” Della, one of our evening servers, said as she walked in. I was behind the counter setting up the register.

“Thanks.” There were four of us in total who worked at the bar. Myself, Daniel, Della, and Holly. Della and Holly mostly worked weekends and now show nights but if the forward momentum kept up, I’d end up hiring another full-time body for the floor tables.

“Did you guys hear that Chaotic Abyss got a slot at El Corazon tonight?” Della nonchalantly mentioned as she secured her apron. “As the opening act so they go on first.”

“Holy crap, that’s insane. Good for them.” Daniel sliced the limes and added them to the container. “I hope this gets them noticed.”

“What time exactly is first?” Should I go? Do I play it cool and hang back? Where is Reagan and what have you done with him? How did I go from barely tolerating to wanting to watch Josh play?

“In an hour. I would recommend taking an Uber if you’re going. Saturday night you won’t find any parking.” Della wandered off to take orders. The bar wasn’t packed, we had just opened but there were still more bodies than we’d had two weeks ago.

“Look, boss,” Daniel gripped my shoulder. “You and Josh have been dancing around whatever this love-hate, do we or don’t we vibe you’ve got going on for years. Go watch. Stay and have a drink or grab a meal with him. Talk to him outside of this place. We’ve got this.”

“What? No, we’re not…” We’re not what? What exactly was I about to protest? The knowing grin on Daniel’s face said far more than I cared to admit. “I’ll go on one condition—you call me if the place gets packed and I’ll come right back.”

“Deal. But don’t forget Holly comes in at six so we’ve got it handled. Josh deserves to have someone there for him. I heard the rumbles the other night. People need to learn to let shit go and move on.” Boy, Daniel hit that one right on the head. Josh more than paid the price for what he did. I read every story I found about him, each with the same take on the incident—that was a long ass time ago. The more I read, the more intrigued I became. This was Josh’s second chance and if having a friend by his side pushed him forward, I was more than willing to be that person for him.

“Thanks. I’ll be back as soon as it’s over.” The driver pulled up as I stepped outside. As expected, the Seattle traffic was a nightmare and what should’ve been a twenty-minute drive took forty-five. I’d texted Jason along the way to let him know I’d be there, and he said he’d put me on the list. Glad for that considering the line to get in wrapped around the perimeter fencing.

The security guards manning the entrance side-eyed me as I bypassed the line. “Can I help you?” Though the massive man posed that as a question, I easily read between the what the fuck do you think you’re doing lines.

“Yes, I’m Reagan Mills. Jason Stallworth put me on the list.” The silence chilled as one guard turned his back on me and returned to pat down each patron and check their tickets as they entered while the other walked away. Were they verifying what I said, or had they left me here to wait?

I swear a minimum of thirty people were let in before the other guard returned and commanded, “Follow me.”

Through the dimly lit corridor we went and around to the back where the bands were. It was standing room only on both sides of the stage and it was hard to see past the bodies in front of me. As the guard pushed his way through, I stayed close and nearly slammed into him when he came to an abrupt stop. I peeked around the mountain of muscle and there stood Jason and Josh. Josh’s eyes lit up when he saw me, and he actually smiled, albeit briefly. Made the long wait more than worth it. “What’re you doing here?”

“Thought you could use a fan. Well, that Chaotic could use a fan.” Did I recover quick enough? Shit, I nearly stuttered. Jason grinned like a fool, but Josh studied me like he didn’t know what to think. Jason had that gleam in his eye that spelled trouble and most likely it was for me.

“Five minutes, Chaotic Abyss,” some random guy announced as he passed us.

“Showtime, guys.” Jason, Josh, Marley, and Nigel collected their stuff and pushed forward.

“Can I help?”

“Here,” Nigel handed me his cymbal stands. “You’re our roadie for the night.”

I wasn’t opposed to helping however I could, but I had zero clue where anything went or how to erect it. “Um?” There I stood, hands outstretched, a stand in each while Nigel laughed as he set up the rest of his kit.

“Thanks, stud,” he winked then took the stands and finished up.

“Where should I go?”

“Front row, right in front of me,” Josh whispered from behind me. Chills raced down my spine. Fucking hell, I hoped he didn’t notice my reaction.

“Okay.” My whisper was but a ghost of my usual voice, so low it was heard by only me. Without a second glance, I walked away toward the front of the stage but stood a couple bodies back. Josh’s eyes still found mine like a beacon tracking that which it sought. There was a shift between us tonight, and I wasn’t sure how to react, let alone feel.

Periodically, Josh scanned the crowd as he played and always found me. It was almost like he played just for me though I knew better. I sang along with the crowd and whistled and cheered at the end of Josh’s guitar solo. He was nothing short of amazing. Fantastic. Brilliant. All the wonderful things I hadn’t allowed myself to see in him before came to light as I watched him play.

How was I supposed to handle this new knowledge, this wave of unexpected feelings?

His career was just taking off as was mine. Neither of us had time for a relationship and one and dones weren’t my style. Even in college I struggled with that and instead chose to bury my head in books. Casual monogamy? Were either of us capable of that?

You’re getting too far ahead of yourself, Reagan. Deep breath and don’t panic.

Panic attack? Who’s panicking?

Was it getting hot in here or was it just me?

The show ended and I hopped back on stage to help. “Great show, guys!” We exchanged high-fives and then I helped Nigel breakdown his kit.

“Yes, great show indeed.” Collectively, we turned to face the man who said this. Josh paled and stepped back, while Jason ran over to shake the guy’s hand.

“Sal, glad you could make it.” Jason was far more excited to see this man than Josh was, not a good sign.

“The manager offered his office to us so we can speak privately. Grab your gear and follow me.” Whoever he was, he exuded power and the way he turned and walked away spoke highly of the control he knew he had.

“Who was that?” I whispered to Josh.

“Sal, the owner of Masterson Management.”

Masterson Management. Why did I know that name?

“Given I don’t fuck this up for the band, I’ll explain later. Can I meet you back at the bar?” Josh was clearly uncomfortable and I think my being here only made it worse.

“Yeah, sure. No problem.” As I turned, Josh grabbed my sleeve.

“Thank you for coming tonight. It meant a lot to me.” The sincerity in his words nearly knocked me on my ass.

“You’re welcome. Great show. You guys kicked ass. I’ll see you in a bit?” Hmm, an unsure question. Yup, I definitely wasn’t myself right now. Alien invasion? Attacked and unknowingly bitten by headbanging zombies? That was a possibility given the full house I was crammed onto the floor with. Being back at the bar and out of Josh’s presence might help clear my head. Or only serve to further confuse me.

Josh grinned. “Yeah, I’ll be there.” The awkward nod we gave each other was quite comical, we were being ridiculous yet cute at the same time. We were grown ass men for fuck’s sake, we could handle our attraction. I hoped…

Even though the ride back to SeaTac took forever, with my mind off on another plane, we pulled up to the hotel before I realized how close we were. “Welcome back, boss. How was the show?” I swear, Daniel had eyes everywhere and that was saying something given the place was nearly at capacity.

“For lack of a better term, they rocked it.” That was putting it mildly. The crowd was wild, and security kept breaking up mosh pits. “Anything interesting going on here?”

“Nothing out of the ordinary. The girls are running the floor and in need of a break.” I hopped behind the bar to help. “I think we need to hire another server.”

“I think you’re right. I’ll put out an ad tomorrow, unless you’ve got someone in mind for me to interview?”

“Let me ask around.” On that note, Daniel hit the floor to break the girls while I filled drink orders.

The kitchen we used was shared with the hotel’s breakfast service staff. Having a cook in there at night wouldn’t be an issue. Hell, if things kept going our way, I may consider opening earlier and adding lunch service. The options were limitless, and it appeared the bar gods had smiled down on us.

Before long, Daniel rejoined me behind the bar. “Did Josh and the guys stay to watch the other bands?”

“Nah, some guy named Sal from Masterson was meeting with them when I left.” The comedic eyes bugging out of his face look Daniel gave me was hilarious. “What?”

“You know who that was, don’t you? The owner of the biggest band management company in Seattle. Hell, likely for the entire west coast, and the one Josh’s former band was signed with.” Fuck, I knew that name was familiar though I’d hoped it was for a more positive reason.

“Oh shit.” I filled drinks on autopilot, thankfully I’d bartended long enough it came naturally. The what ifs and how much getting signed would mean to Jason and the guys wouldn’t subside. On a personal level, I didn’t know jack about Josh but hoped that would change. What was I getting myself into exploring thoughts such as these? There was no time in my life for a boyfriend, but Daniel was right—Josh and I had been dancing around something for a long time. I only hoped it was more than just fucking to him.