5. Mari

Chapter five

Mari

I suddenly miss being unconscious. When you're asleep, things just happen. They could be bad or good, but it doesn't matter in the end because you are not truly there to experience them.

What was that thing? Was it in my head? How did it know my name and her voice? Did it already kill her? Was that what I was hearing? The remnants of Ava's last dying words? Oh god, I can't think like that.

My hands remain balled into fists, with one gripping the knife that is now stained black. I blink, trying to recall who I am and how I arrived. All my memories and thoughts, everything that makes me who I am, drainingout of me into this wretched place.

Patti said creatures are getting dropped here, and humans are the least of his concerns. That must be one of them. They're here, not just in the mountains.

I walk the dirt path back to camp. The rocks cut into my feet, but I don't feel it. Again, there is that oblivion. If there is pain, I'm unaware.

My body moves through the night as if I've given up, and the surrounding space is now conducting my actions. I don't understand how, but I feel I'm heading in the right direction back to camp, like a zombie that still senses where home is.

That voice still plays on a reel in my thoughts, grating on my skin like sandpaper. I stop in the path and squeeze my eyes shut, trying to will that sound from my head. That unearthly timbre to her voice that will forever haunt my dreams.

I eye my palms, expecting to see blood, but there is nothing.I remember the spray of that black, putrid blood. Why am I not marked by it? This place makes little sense. Nothing makes sense.

I gaze at the knife that was pure black moments ago. It now shines in the starlight, singing like a siren. I drop it to my side in frustration, sheathing it back in the leather pouch. "Fuck this place," I say, letting my words die in the dark.

The chilly night tempers my heated skin, and I resume walking again, willing those thoughts from my mind.

Patti stands in the road just ahead. Arms crossed and brow furrowed. Rutty face set in a hard line. He looks as though he'll scold me until he sees my face. His arms drop to their sides, giving me a knowing look.

What does he know? If I had the energy or willingness, I'd ask.

We walk side-by-side, not speaking—somehow, he knows not to question.

Back at camp, the fire blazes back up to a roar, and I sigh in relief when I see the light. It just occurred to me that I've been in darkness this entire time, the blaze stinging my eyes until they adjust.

"Do you want to sit for a while or go back to sleep?" Patti asks with some slight hesitation.

"I'm going to sit by the fire for a bit, but you can go back to sleep. I'm fine." It's my first time speaking to him in my natural tone. No ferocity or intimidation tactics. All of that melted into the ground with that creature.

He shrugs and sits across from me for a time before tucking himself back into his bedroll.

I keep the fire high until dawn crests over the mountains, bathing the tall grasses and quaking aspen trees in soft pink light. I've never believed in deities, or any religion for that matter. But I remember being told of a god that brought on the day. It would be now if there were ever a time to embrace the gods, watching the golden light burn away the shadows. And I wonder if I'll ever sleep again.

Patti wakes at the onset of the morning. Groaning, the navy circles under his eyes indicate his lack of sleep. Guilt floods my system, but I bite it back. It's not my fault I was called into the night. I wasn't trying to run. In fact, I was trying to avoid being someone's dinner.

He packs up camp with the same efficiency as he set it up. I did what I could, recalling where things went on the cart, and attempted to be useful.

The oxen's heavy hooves beat on the path ahead, rattling everything.

"We're going to stop and make a delivery, and I wanted to prepare you for what you'll see," Patti tries to project over the constant clanking and rocking of the cart.

"Well, what am I going to see?" I'm nervous now, silently clenching and unclenching the armrest.

"Have you heard of a dwarf?"

"Like in Lord of the Rings ?" I ask, now very invested in this conversation.

"Well, I don't understand what that is, but if you're picturing a stout creature that is fierce and quick-tongued, then sure. Like that…thing you said."

Are you kidding me? A real dwarf? I'm not really nerdy by any means, but I know what that is. For a moment, when Patti said he wanted to prepare me for what I'd see, the creature from last night was the first image that came to mind. But this…is an oddly welcome surprise.

"That is exactly what I pictured. What information do I need?" Despite myself, this idea makes me a little giddy, some of the despair I had fallen into now clearing with the brightening day.

"Don't gawk. They hate that, and if they offer you anything, take it, and if it's food, finish it. They will take offense otherwise,"he says, snapping the reins, and the oxen pick up speed.

Seems simple enough. Don't be a dick and accept all gifts.

"Okay, I think I can manage that,"I say, releasing the armrest where my firsts were white knuckles.

"Can you?" he says, side-eyeing me. "Can you keep the venom from your tone long enough for me to make my delivery?" One of his brows ticks up, truly questioning if I am, in fact, capable of being pleasant.

His accusations should shock me, but they don't. It's deserved. "Yes, I will be on my best behavior," I say, steepling my hands in a gesture of innocence.

He scoffs but doesn't push the issue.His russet face scans the horizon the way any practiced traveler's would .

The house we pull up to is any cottage core fanatic's wet dream.

It's a single-story rock-and-mortar home with a thatched roof. It has small round windows with pale yellow curtains billowing out.The front yard hasa fewsmall garden areas with weaved willow branch fences.

As we follow the driveway to the back, a large barn/shop space is visible behind the house.

Patti hit the nail on the head. A short, stocky man with salt and pepper hair and a matching beard stands, arms crossed. He's maybe 4'4", if I were to guess, with pointy ears and gold hoops adorning his nose and beard.

"Winnie!" Patti shouts to the man.

"Winnie? That's his name?" I say under my breath.

"It's actually Windermere, but he felt it was too pompous for his personality."

I can't help but agree with that. Winnie, it is.

The man—Winnie—opens his arms wide for Patti. He flashes a big, kind smile, and I can't help but smile back. I've never seen someone who exudes happiness the way this man does.

Despite the height difference, they awkwardly embrace and quickly get to work.

Patti walks over to the cart, grabbing two bags of wool. "Hey, would you help me with the other two bags tagged with red string?" He tilts his head toward the other fabrics.

"Sure, no problem." I hop out of the cart more enthusiastically than intended. Then, walking past Winnie, I see him eye me in an assessing manner. According to Patti, humans exist here but not in large numbers, so I wonder if I'm the first one he's seen.

"Aren't you a little tall for a human woman? "

I roll my eyes. I want to begin on good terms with him, but hearing that shit every day since puberty is getting tiresome."We come in all shapes and sizes, actually."

Patti rolls his eyes at me. There was no effort on my part to contain my annoyance.

"Oh, um." Winnie rights himself. "I didn't mean to offend, miss."

I loose a long breath. "It's fine. It's just something I hear a lot."

He raises his brows and gives me a knowing look."Yes, well, I understand that very well. Since I was a lad…" He leans in conspiratorially, bright blue eyes dancing with mirth behind caterpillar-like eyebrows. "…people have asked me for my portrait because I'm so breathtakingly handsome." He sighs, as if the world sits on his shoulders. "It's a burden I've had to live with."

A feline smile crooks the corner of his mouth, and he arches a thick eyebrow. My mouth twitches as the smile I'm desperately trying to fight back alights on my face.

Okay, I might like this dude.