Chapter 38

LYNN

When the elevator dings, I look that way to see Joey step through the metal doors. He's wearing a dark suit with a gray button-down, and I realize I've never seen him this dressed up. He looks good.

His face brightens the second he spots me leaning against the wall by his condo door. "Hey!" He smiles as he closes the distance between us.

"One of your neighbors buzzed me in. You might want to talk to the building manager about security." I don't know why I'm making small talk when I'm only here to say one thing.

When Joey bends to kiss me hello, I pretend to have an itch on my knee and duck his gesture. I can't kiss him. Not when I'm so fucking angry with him.

He unlocks his door and holds it open for me, and I quickly walk through. The sooner I get this over with, the sooner I can leave for my shift at Blue Bigfoot. Since I have no car and no freedom, I may as well earn some money while I seethe and plot murder. I'm thinking Cash will be first in line.

Only when Joey removes his jacket and turns to face me do I notice the awkwardness in his movements. He's nervous. He should be.

"Why did you do it?" I ask.

At least he doesn't try to deny it. I can always say one thing for Joey: he's an open book. But I'm not expecting the answer I get.

He exhales slowly, propping his hand on his hips, before meeting my gaze with those espresso beauties I want so desperately to despise. "Because I love you."

My head goes light and spots start dancing in front of my eyes, so I blindly reach for the nearest solid surface. I brace myself on the entry table until I'm able to blink the spots away. But my heartbeat thumps loudly in my ears while I stand there and try wrapping my mind around his answer.

When the silence stretches for what feels like an eternity, he finally breaks it. "Did you hear me?"

Oh, I heard him all right. I just have no idea what to do with that information. Half my body wants to melt into a puddle of goo and run into his arms, but the other half is way too rational for that—and way too mad. I decide to go with what's most familiar.

"You don't love me," I declare, shaking my head.

"I think I know my own feelings, Lynn." His voice is soft, even with the familiar rumble, and there's that lopsided grin. He's trying to kill me.

But I'm stronger than that, so I straighten my shoulders and press on. "If you loved me, you'd respect me and treat me like an equal."

"I do treat you like an equal." He throws one arm out. "Hell, I hold you up on a damn pedestal, if anything."

My chin snaps back. "That's exactly what I'm saying!"

"Holding you in high esteem means I don't think you're equal to me?"

"I'm not some treasure, Joey." I bring a fist to my chest, still not wanting to release the table that might be holding me up. "I'm a woman. A thinking, breathing, capable woman. All I want is to be treated like one."

Joey mirrors my gesture with both his hands. "I do treat you like one!"

"No, you don't. If you did, you wouldn't have tattled to my brothers like we're all children on a playground." I can't be with someone who promises something in one moment and breaks that promise the next.

"I did it because I fucking love you, Lynn, and it would gut me to my core if anything happened to you. Can't you understand that?"

"Nothing is going to happen to me," I insist.

"Did you think anything would happen to your dad when he went in for that surgery, never to come out again?"

I gasp at his words, leaning on the table for support now. "I can't believe you said that."

He takes a step closer, his hand extended like he wants to pull me to him. When I halt him by thrusting my palm out, he stops. "I'm sorry. The last thing I want to do is hurt you." He runs frustrated fingers through his hair, leaving it looking like he just woke up. It's normally my favorite look on him, but not today. "I was just trying to make a point. Everyone cares about you and wants you safe. Putting yourself in the path of a criminal is the definition of unsafe. You won't even let anyone go with you."

"I would have welcomed you. But since you couldn't, I had no choice but to go alone."

His eyebrows spike. "So, you went?"

"No."

He lets out a heavy exhale. "But you're going to." Before I can respond, he continues, "Please, just take one of your brothers, at least, if you can't wait for me."

I bark out a humorless laugh at that, my sarcastic inner bitch taking over. "Wow. Great idea, Ace."

Joey's face falls, and I fight against the regret clawing at my heart. "Don't say that name when you're angry. Please, Lynn."

"Fine. What I was going to say is that I'd love to take one of my brothers with me, but none of them can leave town, and I've been forbidden from driving my own fucking car."

"What?" He appears genuinely surprised.

"What did you think they'd do, Joey? I told you what they were like, and you kept saying you thought it was sweet and nice. They literally stole my car keys—and Mama's! And I can't even ask any of the girls to drive me because they all want to call the cops. So, now we're stuck, and Winston will probably sign his house over to his evil daughter, and these developers will find a new way to force Mama and Adrina out!"

"You don't know that will happen." He shakes his head, but I have a ready response.

"You don't know it won't."

Joey drops his eyes to his shoes, but I watch him, still simmering with anger and frustration. "There are other ways to end this. Ginny can be honest with Winston. You all can set up a meeting with The Diamond Group. You can call the cops about Larry and get him returned. Would that be so bad?"

Tears start welling, and I honestly don't know if I want to laugh or cry. "You don't get it."

"No, I guess I don't." His face swims in my vision, every handsome feature distorted. "Explain it to me. Why is this so important?"

The tears win, spilling down my cheeks. "Because I want my dad back, and I can't have him."

Even through my tears, I can see the pain etched on Joey's face. "I don't understand."

I genuinely want him to understand. I need someone to understand. So I try piecing the words together, unsure if they'll make any sense but pushing forward nonetheless. "I play the tough girl—always. But inside, my heart is broken. When Denny left after the funeral, I had to make a choice: crumble apart and die or toughen up. So I toughened up." My voice cracks, but I keep going. "But my heart stayed broken, and I never learned how to fix it. So, yeah, I'm defensive and independent and determined, and I refuse to apologize for it. Because life breaks your heart, and that's a fact. It's up to you to protect yourself." I press a balled fist to my chest again, desperately trying to hold the tears back.

"When all this bad shit started happening, my brothers kept it from me, thinking they were doing right by me in protecting me from hurt or worry. But what they don't understand—what they've never understood—is that standing on my own two feet and fighting back with my own fists is the only way to get back my power—to keep that awful helplessness at bay. I couldn't control what happened with my dad, but I can damn sure control other things. And with each battle I win, I'm not only carrying on, I'm doing it in a way that would make my dad proud."

"Fuck, Lynn." Joey moves closer, but again, I stop him. "I don't know what to say." He stands in front of me, hands limp at his sides.

"I think you've said enough already. I have to go." I swipe the tears from my cheeks and suck in a cleansing breath.

"Let me at least drive you. We can talk more on the way."

"No." I shake my head and turn for the door. "Miller's waiting for me downstairs." I had to get a ride from my brother to break up with my boyfriend. Am I the only one who sees how ridiculous this is?

"Precious cargo," Joey whispers from behind me, and I can't tell if he meant for me to hear or not.

Either way, as I close the door behind me, I say, "Yeah, watch out, or I might break."