Thirty-Six

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TOBY

"That was stupid,"Rakesh says. He's frowning at the ice.

Honestly, it was a shock to learn how much he actually understands hockey. I was kind of under the impression that he was simply a hockey husband. Which was surprising on its own. Especially after having been around him several times. He and Egon couldn't be more opposite.

I have far too much fun entertaining myself by studying them. Their dynamic is fun to see and there's zero doubt about the love they share.

The refs are making stupid calls and I feel like they just get worse as the second period carries on. It's been difficult not to be a little biased when it comes to L.A. since getting together with Atty. Generally speaking, I keep all my predictions away from L.A. as much as I can and especially away from Atty. It's a precarious line I walk as I date a hockey player and also predict hockey outcomes.

It doesn't make me any less correct than normal, and that pisses off the public more than anything else. It's like I'm jinxing other teams in order to give my boyfriend's better juju.

If only.

Today is a big day. First, I have to try to concentrate on business. Which is proving rather difficult. I've started a new segment on my profile that's more of a play-by-play of games in real time and from there, I predict the outcome.

I already lost today's prediction but, in my defense, I've been largely distracted and I knew this going in. I called that the game would go into overtime and L.A. would win in a shootout.

Obviously, that isn't happening.

I ended up taking a variation of the job that Megan at Sports Spot offered me. We compromised when it came to travel because I told her that was a deal-breaker for me. Atty is my life, he's my future, and anything that might compromise that outcome is just not a contender in my life.

So she countered and said that the company would only ask me to go to some games and they'd be within a few hours of wherever Atty is if they're not his games. I got that guarantee in writing and so far, they've been very good about it.

I enjoy seeing my name on the television. My face still remains largely incognito, though I'm not as anonymous as I once was since my face is everywhere with Atty. I don't mind.

"Fuck's sake," Rake mutters, scowling at the ref. "Infuriating."

"That's shit, right?" Miller comments, twisting around to look at me. "That call was shit?"

"I wasn't watching," I admit.

He rolls his eyes.

"Yes, it was shit," Elixon says from my other side. "Rake's about ready to take over reffing."

"I could," Rake says.

All my friends are here tonight. My roommates and Jayse. Even Vulcan came down with his entire family. I have Atty's friends with us, too. Lix is almost always here because of Noah, but Rake came; as did Joe, Atty's neighbor.

My nerves have been on fire all day. Sometimes I'm so excited that I think I'm going to break out of my skin and others I'm so nervous I want to throw up. I'm not sure which is going to win, but I hope I don't throw up.

"Thank fuck for the intermission," Lix says. "I need a break from scowling."

I laugh as I get to my feet and stretch.

"Going to head down now?" Jayse asks. He's grinning like a porn star. You know the look. Knowing and flirty, like something is about to go down.

"Yeah."

It took a lot of coordination and permission and begging the fucking gay gods that everyone keeps their mouths shut to pull this off. Even right now, there's a fine line of being in the crowd where maybe Atty's spotted me and sneaking down so I can slip onto the ice after the game without Hugo spotting me beforehand and getting suspicious.

"Good luck," Lix says.

I take a deep breath and nod.

"You don't need luck. Just don't throw up," Ramah adds.

"Yeah, thanks," I deadpan, frowning. He grins and gives me two thumbs up.

Fucker.

I move slowly, stopping for some water on the way. Presenting the tag I've had hidden in my pocket gains me access to the bowels of the stadium which most people will never see. A guy leads me toward the big tunnel that the Zambonis move through.

This is where I hang out for the third period. Staying out of sight so my boyfriend doesn't see me and trying to make sure Hugo doesn't either.

He's the one person I didn't tell. The man can't keep a secret to save his life. Winslow said he'd keep Hugo in line when it's time. His presence was guaranteed since he's on Atty's team, so I didn't have to worry about that, at least.

I thought about inviting Atty's mother. I'm still up in the air about whether I made the right decision not to include her. Since Atty's cousin's wedding, his mother calls all the time and while I think Atty appreciates that she's trying, he's always left a little unsure after their calls.

This was the biggest debate I had about this entire thing. I'm most scared that I made the wrong decision and Atty will be upset that she's not here.

But this is just the beginning. There are plenty of things she can be here for if she wants to be a part of our lives.

Watching the game at ice level is… stressful. Sometimes it feels like I'm right there. More than once, I find myself yelling at a play, a fight against the boards, or a bad call. Being this close almost feels like you're a part of the game!

It's also very stressful being a part of the game. I'm thankful when the last buzzer sounds and it's over. Jesus. I don't think my heart could take that kind of stress every day. I've always respected hockey players, but I've just unlocked a new level of admiration.

Fuck that. I don't have the health for this kind of stress. My heart would give out, easy!

I creep to the door that will lead into the Golden Tides' team box. Ajo is waiting there and gives me a nod.

Standing at the short wall in front of the half door, I take a deep breath, my eyes locked on Atty. The announcer is doing his thing. I know that my cue is anytime after he asks the crowd to stay back for the silent auction winners to be announced. From there, he'll play off my move.

When I get up the nerve.

My eyes rise to the crowd. There are a lot of fucking people here tonight. Over 10,000. That means there are at least that many witnesses. I'm not sure if the auction is going to be televised or not. I really hope not.

Or maybe I hope it is. I'm not entirely sure.

Our friends have likely made it down to the boards now. That's as front row as they're going to get. Swallowing my nerves, I look at Atty again. He's leaning against the goal with Winslow and Hugo. Winslow's smiling at me and gives me an encouraging nod.

Slipping my hand into my pocket, it closes around the small box. Okay. I got this.

As with any show night at Medieval Company, I encourage a calm that I don't necessarily feel to settle over me until it's a new skin. With it in place, I put on a smile and step onto the ice. The hand not gripping the box in my pocket holds the short wall to make sure I don't immediately fall on my ass.

Ice is tricky like that.

Once I have my bearings, I start moving toward the center and then toward Atty. He's not looking up. I don't get more than a dozen feet when the announcer says, "Oh… look at this! Everyone, quiet and let's see what he's going to do next!"

The crowd hushes. That catches Atty's attention, and he turns toward where I'm crossing the ice. His eyes are on me immediately. I see his confusion, even as he smiles when meeting my eyes. His lips move and then Winslow's hand is over Hugo's mouth.

I can't help the laughter that bubbles up inside me at that. Atty glances at them but Noah gently pushes him toward me and Atty's once more looking at me as he glides my way. I wink and grin. Atty's lips twitch as he finally gets his skates under him and moves in my direction.

"Hey," I say as we meet, and he slows down so he doesn't plow me over. "Nice game, baby girl."

His eyes glint and I finally get a huge smile on his face. "Thanks. What are you doing out here?"

The nerves build, but then, as I'm staring in Atty's eyes, they just fall away. We're not sitting in front of more than 10,000 fans right now. It's just us. Like the day we met, once our eyes meet, everything else fades into the background.

"I love you," I tell him. "I have all these things to say, but I'm not sure anything I say will actually describe this. You've changed my life. You've made me realize that the kind of love that you read about—or watch on ShareIt—can be had in real life. It's not just a fairy tale without a happy ending."

Atty sighs. "I love you too."

"I'm going to test your reflexes now. Don't let me fall on my face."

He grins widely. "Never. But what?—"

His words cut off as I manage to get down on one knee without slipping. I pull my hand out and open the box to show him what I've been hiding. His eyes widen and I visibly hear his breath catch.

"Marry me, Atty?"

Silence. His mouth opens wider and then he's nodding.

I shift to get up and nearly fall, but Atty's there. His helmet hits the ice as he grips my arms and hauls me up to his chest. Since he's already a few inches taller than me without blades, I definitely can't touch the ground now, so I swing my legs up and wrap them around him. I close the box in my hand, keeping the ring safe, and grip him tightly.

"Did you really just ask me to marry you on the ice?" Atty asks, his voice breathless.

"It's the perfect place. I tried to find a way to work it into my routine at Medieval Company, but the liability and shit… they just wouldn't have it."

He laughs, his arms tightening. "Fuck, Toby."

Our little bubble is broken when bodies crash into us. I hear the cheers then. I'm sure there are jeers too, but the cheers are definitely louder. There are words flying as bodies and hands jostle us, but I don't let go of Atty and he doesn't let go of me.

I'll get this ring on his finger soon enough, but right now, I just want to be wrapped up in him.

"I love you," I whisper, my lips right at his ear. "I can't wait to make you my husband."

He sighs and I know that it's contentment. Happiness. I'm going to make sure I keep hearing that sound forever.