Chapter 15

[Clay]

“Was I interrupting something?” Knox teases and wiggles his large brows, implying he knows damn well he did.

“Don’t be obtuse.”

Knox chuckles while I swipe a hand over my mouth, desperate to contain the kiss, while simultaneously wiping it away as if Knox can see it on my lips. As if he senses that the kiss I shared with Mavis was exactly as I said it would be. Unique. Special. Beautiful.

I’ll never be the same.

Even her whispered plea to kiss her had me jolting to life. Like I hadn’t known I needed someone to tell me to do such a thing before. Like I hadn’t found it hot as hell that she was claiming what she wanted, moments after acting afraid of me.

Then she offered additional instruction. Soft demands and hesitant commands.

Give me your tongue . Fuck, I’m still hard just thinking about her requesting such a thing from me.

If she wants control, if she needs to be the lead, I’m not going to fight her. Especially not after the buzzing sensation that still vibrates within me. As I told her earlier, I’d chase her, no net required.

I feel exalted, elated, like I’m high on something. My dick is hard as a rock. My heart hammers excitedly within my chest. The desire to race after Mavis and beg her to command me again grips my throat.

What the fuck is happening to me?

She’s like a fine wine you only get to sample, but I want a full glass.

“Powerful stuff, huh?”

My head swings upward and I glare at my brother. “What?”

“Must have been some kiss.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I give him my back and take a seat at my desk, needing a moment to calm down.

Knox chuckles. “Dude. Festival.”

Right. Yes. The fest. “I’ll be down in a minute.”

My brother laughs harder. “I get it. I want to whisk Halle off as well but—”

“It’s not like that.” I spin in my desk chair, using the desk to shield my hard dick like I’m some randy school-aged kid, while I glare at Knox. My voice is sharp and direct. I clutch the edge of my desk as if holding myself back from pouncing on him. I clear my throat. “We aren’t like that.”

I hate how I said the same thing earlier to Ford when he teased me on the phone. When I said I wanted to show Mavis something in my office and he asked me if that was a sexual euphemism.

Mavis and I aren’t like that. She’s coming off a bad relationship. I don’t do them period.

Case in point, my brother standing in front of me, reminding me of a festival I run every year, where I attend to every detail, making certain it’s perfect. It’s profitable. It goes off without a hitch or scratch or dent that would soil what I’ve rebuilt in our family business. I’m in control.

And yet, I’m off-kilter. Mavis has unraveled me. And deep down I’m afraid to admit what I really want. What I know I need. Someone for me. Not my siblings or the Seed & Soil or a festival of people, but that one person who is all mine. Who wants me as me, not brother or boss or community leader.

Hell, I don’t want to lead anything. I want Mavis to be the driver, take the wheel and guide our journey. She’s the one I’m afraid to be close to, because someone like her could break me.

Because before, she was someone unobtainable. I could smile and be kind, offer a compliment, maybe a little flirt, and it was all innocent because it had to be. She was married, or so I thought.

But now? Mavis Grant is within my reach, and I can do all the things I told her I was envious of with her ex. I can look at her and be with her. Touch her and hold her, with her permission. With her guidance. With the power firmly in her hands.

Could she want more? Could she offer me more?

“Be careful here, Clay.” Knox interjects over my rambling thoughts.

“You think I’m trying to save her, don’t you?” I demand, still on edge. Still shaky, with the energy I can’t contain.

“Aren’t you?” He arches a brow again.

I shake my head because it would never occur to anyone that I’m not doing the saving.

She might save me.

+ + +

Following Knox out of my office and back to the festival, I reflect on Glady’s sudden appearance. How it must have looked to Mavis. As small-town rumors bleed into other small towns, Glady must have heard about my housemates. It was the only explanation for her sudden appearance at the Seed & Soil because we didn’t see one another outside of our rare hookups.

When Mavis disappeared, I was quick to follow her, rushing to excuse myself from Glady after telling her I’d met someone. I was no longer available. No feelings, hard or soft , Glady and I once promised each other.

And right now, my emotions are in turmoil as I struggle to find Mavis and Dutton in the crowd and fight the urge to take them back to my home. I don’t buy the excuse Mavis was selling about an accidental collision in the hallway. Something, or rather someone, spooked her, and the last thing I want is Mavis frightened of living in Sterling Falls. Or afraid of me.

That kiss proved she didn’t fear me.

Fifteen minutes of searching here and there pass before I find Mavis and Dutton, who were not in the area with the newly hatched chicks or in any of the other animal petting experiences provided by local farmers.

Instead, Mavis and Dutton are doing some kind of dance to kid-friendly music on the temporary dance floor where a group singing children’s songs performs. Zelle and Winnie join them.

Later tonight, there will be a band for adults. I should have asked Mavis to hang out. I hadn’t considered childcare. Haven’t ever been with a woman who has a kid. Now, I’m certain I’m too late to find someone to watch Dutton.

Someone bumps into my arm, and I turn toward Ford, who is holding June against his chest, her head on his shoulder. His hand gently rubs up and down her back.

“Someone tired?”

“Yeah, she needs a nap.”

“No nap,” she mutters around the thumb in her mouth.

“When’s she going to give that up?” I chuckle, noting her thumb’s position.

“Probably not until she’s sixteen.” Ford presses a kiss to her downy blond curls. Then he tips his chin toward Mavis and the girls dancing. “What’s her story?”

“Still trying to figure it all out myself,” I admit.

“And Dutton.” Ford means the costume.

“He likes pink and princesses.” I hold my breath recalling how I first reacted. A bit stunned but not offput by the behavior.

“Winnie wants to have him over tonight for a while.”

I spin to fully face my brother. Was the Universe just listening to me? “How would you feel about that?”

“What?” Ford shifts only his head to glance at me. “Winnie making a new friend?”

I smile, knowing Ford’s deflecting any issue with a boy liking stereotypical girl things, as in, Ford isn’t bothered by it, as he shouldn’t be.

“He isn’t in the local school. Mavis is homeschooling him right now.”

“So I heard. Now Winnie’s trying to convince me she shouldn’t have to go to a physical school, and I should be her teacher.” Ford chokes. “Put me out of my misery. Kudos to the parents who homeschool, but I can’t educate from home. And I know teachers aren’t paid enough to deal with my rascals, but I’m still not interested in homeschooling.”

“Might help Dutton if he had a friend as well. He’s been through a lot, but he’s a good kid.”

Ford nods, not needing all the details.

The silly song finishes, and the kids rush Ford with Mavis laughing as she follows them.

“Daddy, can Dutton please come over?”

Mavis and Ford catch a look before Ford speaks, “I really don’t mind.”

Dutton has his hands folded together like he’s praying, bouncing on his toes, pleading with his mom.

“If you’re really sure.” Apparently, the invitation must have already been offered.

“Got a call with my girl later. That’s my only plan tonight.”

My brother is newly in love and his world-famous country-music girlfriend will be home from her tour in a few weeks. Until then, he’s doing lots of Facetime and hand jobs to get him through the absence.

I don’t think I could ever have a long-distance relationship. If I had a woman, a wife, I’d want her present all the time, working with me, beside me, like I remember my parents before everything fell apart. I’ll never understand how my father loved my mother before her death, and then seemed to forget all that love after she was gone.

My gaze lands on Mavis.

“Let me swing back to Clay’s place so Dutton can change and then I’ll bring him over to your house.”

“Sounds like a plan,” Ford agrees.

Dutton and Winnie face one another and scream, jumping up and down like bouncing beans and teetering with excitement.

As for me, I’m thrilled for Dutton. Then, I step over to Mavis.

“Hey, you think you might want to come back here after you drop off Dutton? There’ll be a grown-up band playing later tonight.”

Mavis’s dark eyes open wide, whether surprised by the invitation or something else, I’m not certain, but I’m not interested in brushing off that kiss and I don’t want her avoiding me until we can talk about it.

“Let me get Dutton settled.” She glances back at him, brows furrowing. “I’ll think about it.”

“Think yes, butterfly. You deserve a night off.”

She offers me a cautious smile and I want to reach out for her, tug her to me, and give her another kiss right here to ease her troubled mind. But I promised to let her lead.

For the first time in my life, I’m relinquishing control, and the sensation is both frightening and thrilling.

I watch as they all walk away. Ford and his girls. Mavis and Dutton. Then Ford turns around, walking backward a few paces. He points at his eyes with two fingers then swivels his hand toward me.

You owe me , he mouths. Then he laughs and spins back around.

Apparently, I’m not fooling anyone about my attraction to Mavis.

Not even myself.