Chapter Fifteen

Chapt er Fifteen

I wake up from a deep, dreamless sleep in a familiar bed, half sprawled atop a familiar body. I let myself enjoy the warmth of being pressed against someone for a moment, eyes still closed. Memories of the previous evening begin to slowly drift back to me, all the talking, the frustration, the emotions. By the time Khazak and I went to bed, we were exhausted.

Part of me was hoping that getting in bed would lead to some things happening, but Khazak decided not to take me up on my offer to fool around. He was a perfect gentleman. He didn’t make me sleep on the other side of the mattress or anything, but he wouldn’t even take off his underwear. If I had to guess, I’d say he’s still having some hang-ups, which I appreciate—a lot—but the hard cock I am currently grinding into his thigh does not.

Look, apparently it only takes a little trauma and a few good orgasms for me to get over years of deep-seated denial and self-deception. I’m not trying to argue the merits of that. I’m just horny and would like the guy who’s been going out of his way to make me horny to do something about it. I may have to take things into my own hands. Hopefully not literally.

I finally open my eyes, the amount light behind the curtains letting me know how late it is. Seems like we decided to sleep in today. I run my hand lightly down his furry chest and stomach. Yeah, this is nice. Khazak doesn’t stir at my movement, so I keep running my hand along his body slowly, until I bump into his tented briefs and my earlier thought of taking things into my own hands comes floating b ack to me.

Carefully extracting myself from his side, I move onto my knees and crawl backward until I’m kneeling by his hips. There’s something we haven’t done yet that I think I’m finally ready to admit I’ve been curious about. I reach a hand out, brushing lightly over his trapped erection, watching it twitch while its owner remains still. I reach for his waistband and hook my fingers inside, carefully stretching it up and over the thick green slab of meat and tucking it under his balls.

Now that it’s free, I can actually wrap my hand around this thing. Just barely though. I think this is the first time I’ve actually touched it, the first time I’ve touched another man’s dick at all other than when it’s been pressed against my leg or say, inside me . The memory makes me shudder slightly. It’s thick, the head looking slightly thicker as it peeks out from behind his foreskin. There’s the slightest curve upward in the middle while the base ends in a dark forest of pubic hair, a thick trail leading up to his stomach. I stroke my hand up and down the shaft, uncovering more of the head and feeling the heat in my hand. The organ gives another twitch, but there’s no other movement from the still-sleeping orc and I continue my ex ploration.

I wouldn’t really mind if he woke up—I don’t think he’d stop me—but I feel a little like a newborn deer right now, just with dicks instead of walking. I’d like to get my first look and feel of one without any potentially-mocking eyes. I know I’m being paranoid, but I can already hear the jokes Mike would make. Okay David, maybe not the time to start thinking about your brother . Shaking off that thought, I kneel up slightly, ready to begin phase two o f my plan.

I have no idea if I’m doing this right, but here goes nothing. I lean forward, one hand holding him steady and the other on the mattress as I lower my face to his crotch. Immediately the scent of his musk hits me, which is kinda nice now that I’m actually receptive to it. I open my mouth as I near the head of his dick, where a small bead of precum has gathered at the tip. A salty, slightly bitter taste hits my tongue as I close my lips around him. It’s not bad, helped by the knowledge of who it comes from. I run my tongue along his foreskin, even daring to poke underneath. I’m not saying it’s delicious, but it’s a lot less unpleasant than I have been led t o believe.

Feeling more confident, I sink my head lower, taking in a few more inches before I feel the head poking at the back of my throat. I stop before I make myself gag, but I’m barely getting a third of this thing in my mouth. Pretty sure I could wrap both my hands around what’s left of the shaft. Still only using one at the moment, holding it in place while I try pulling my head back a little before sinking down again. That’s what you’re supposed to do, right? I’ve never actually seen or received a blowj ob before.

See? This is why I’m glad he’s asleep. This feels like something I should already know how to do, and who would I even ask ? Trial and error works for now. I slowly bob up and down, a little more confident but still worried about gagging. It’s weird trying to figure out how much suction I’m supposed to use, and suddenly I become very aware of my teeth and how I would not want to feel them on my own dick, and I can’t stop thinking about how sore my jaw already is from trying to avoid it. I need to relax. This is supposed to be fun.

Not that my dick has gone down at all. I reach down and give myself a squeeze as I work my way up and down his length. Yeah, I’m definitely into this. I start to stroke myself in time with the movement of my mouth. I’m still going a little slow, but the hand on my dick is encouraging me to pick up the pace. I settle into a nice rhythm, but get too cocky and wind up going a little too deep and choking myself. Just for a second, but it’s enough for my gag reflex to kick in, and I pull back before I start coughing. I don’t want to wake h im up yet.

I catch my breath, shifting around the mattress to kneel between his legs. His cock is shiny with my spit, even more so thanks to the gagging. I run my hand along the slick skin, enjoying the way it glides a little easier. Once I have regained my bearings, I lean over to take him back in my mouth, still using my hand to hold him steady. As I resume my oral endeavor, I realize I can use the saliva to my advantage, allowing some of the excess that builds in my mouth to drip down and lubricate the way for my hand to stroke the remaining five or so inches of his shaft. I think I’m starting to get the han g of this.

I look up at Khazak’s sleeping form, a big smile plastered on his face. I relax into things again, confident that I now know what I’m doing and the limits of my gag reflex. I close my eyes, enjoying the way the darkness makes his scent that much more powerful. Yeah, okay, I get why people like doing this. I’m not really sure how long I’ve been at this, I lost track of time a while ago, when for a split second it feels like his dick is getting bigger in my mouth.

I shouldn’t be that surprised when the first shot of cum hits the roof of my mouth, but I am. I mean, I know this is the end result of a blowjob, but I hadn’t really gotten that far in my thinking. The second and third shots are less surprising but still manage to catch me off guard when they hit the back of my throat. I immediately start to choke and pull back, but that leaves shots four, five, and six to all splatter acros s my face.

By the time I’ve finished coughing, I’m not sure how much cum ended up down my gullet and how much is splattered across Khazak’s groin and belly. I’m leaning up on one hand, the other used to cover my mouth during my coughing fit, leaving me with a jizz-cov ered palm.

Oh, how far you’ve co me, David.

So that’s how giving my first blo wjob went.

“I am so sorry, David.” I look up, only just realizing Khazak is awake. “I should have warned you when that was about to happen.” The attempt he’s making to hold in his laughter doesn’t quite reach his eyes.

I give him a “Ya think?” look as I continue to cough.

He moves to the edge of the mattress, reaching under the bedside table for a towel. I (or any other guy who’s gone through puberty) don’t have to think very hard about why there’s one of those nearby. He uses it to wipe my face and hand before moving on to his own body. Once he’s satisfied, he tosses it to the side, sliding back up the bed and bringing me with him.

“Was that your first time?” He settles us on our sides, his arm going around my shoulders.

“Uh huh.” I nod, moving my still sore jaw around, the taste of him still on my tongue.

“Well, you performed admirably.” He cups my chin gently before leaning in to kiss me. “The soreness will lessen with practice.”

“How long were you awake?” And how much of my performance did he catch?

“I woke up a little before the first time you gagged,” he admits. “It seemed like you were enjoying yourself, and I did not want to disturb you.” He’s still grinning.

“How kind of you.” I roll my eyes. “You better warn me n ext time.”

“There will be a next time?” he asks playfully.

“If you play your cards right, Sir.” I wiggle my eyebrows.

After chuckling and pulling me in for another kiss, we roll out of bed. It’s strange how easy it is to slip into this...thing between us, how domestic it already feels. I’m not fighting against it, not anymore. I get the feeling that would just leave me with a sore ass.

It’s late enough that we skip breakfast and go straight to lunch, just some grilled fish. We eat in relative silence, still waking up, when Khazak puts his fork down to tell me something.

“My family is having a dinner tonight. We normally have them once a month,” he starts explaining. “Given the events of the past few days, I thought it would be best to skip. It is not normally too difficult to get out of attending, but my sister is home for the first time in over a year and my father is insisting. An invite has also been extended to you of course, but I would understand if you would prefer to stay here instead.”

“They invited me?” Maybe it’s normal around here to invite your child’s slave to dinner?

“My family is nothing if not hospitable.” Kh azak nods.

“When did you find that out?” It sounds like it’s new information t o him too.

“Yesterday. It was one of the stops I made while I was out.” He toys with his fork a little while he talks, like he’ s nervous.

My first thought is to take his offer of not attending because I think he’s right. Meeting his family right now after everything that’s happened seems like it would be more than just awkward. But so far almost everyone he’s introduced me to has been pretty nice. Jury’s still out on Brull. His family though, if they’re related to him, they’ve gotta be decent peop le, right?

“Actually, I think I’d like to go.” There’s also a part of me that’s interested in seeing what an orc family dinne r is like.

“Are you sure?” He looks surprised at my answer. “It really would not be a problem to make an excuse for your absence.” Aww, is he nervous about me meeting h is family?

“No really. It sounds like it might be fun.” His smile still looks a little stiff at my answer. “Besides, your dad is the one who taught you how to cook, right? I bet the food’s gonna be great.” That gets me a chuckle. “Your sister mo ved away?”

“In a way. She travels a lot, all over the world.” He stabs a piece of fish with his fork. “This is the second longest she has been away from home. Right after our twenty-fifth birthday, she left on a journey south for almost a year an d a half.”

“Wow.” She sounds awesome. “Wait, you have the same birthday?”

“I should hope so. She is my twin.” He brings another bite to his mouth.

“No fucking way. You’re a twin too?” How did I not know? Don’t an swer that.

“You have a twin sister?” He looks surprised, swallowing his food and dabbing his mouth.

“Brother.” I wonder what he’s doing right now.

“So there are two of you? Oh no.” There’s that dry sense of humor.

“You wish. We’re not identical.” That’s usually one of the first things people ask when they find out I have a twi n brother.

“It is quite the coincidence that we would both be twins.” He looks genuinely intrigued.

“Yeah, that’s crazy.” Seriously, what are the odds? “What’s her name?”

“Ayla.” Simple enough . “Yours?”

“Michael.” Or Mike. Or Mikey. “Are you t wo close?”

“When we were younger. As we got older, our paths in life diverged.” Sounds like he’s probably said that before. “She and I still talk, but it is not like when we were children.”

“I know what you mean.” It’s not an unfamiliar story. “Mike and I were practically inseparable as kids, but then about two years ago, he went off to fancy wizard college and now we don’t talk as much.” Even less now that I no longer have a mailin g address.

“But up until then you two had similar interests?” He takes another bite of his fish.

“Not even a little.” I shake my head, smiling when I think about Mike and me back in school together. “We have the same eyes, same nose, same sense of humor, but we’re different in just about every o ther way.”

“How so?” He leans back in his chair as h e listens.

“He’s a nerd.” I mean that in the nicest way possible. Do orcs have a word for nerd? “When we were little, he was always reading a book or getting excited about something he learned in school while I was busy running around trying to climb trees and hit things with sticks. He was always awkward arou nd girls—”

“Whereas you were awkward around boys?” He is way too pleased with himself for that one. This is my own fault.

I narrow my eyes but continue. “We still wanted to do everything together. We’d lose our shit if someone tried to separate us. It wasn’t until we were older that we finally started wanting a little space. Still shared a bedroom for eighteen year s though.”

“That is a long time to share a bedroom.” He’s a little taken aback. Probably didn’t have to share with his sister. “Did that not get awkward?”

“Not really. I mean, it wasn’t always easy to get some privacy when you wanted it, but we told each other everything anyway.” Still did up until recently. “Even when we started getting older and doing different things, we still looked out for each other. He got picked on in school a lot. I didn’t like that—I don’t like bullies in general. So I kinda made it my job to be his protector. Taught him how to defend himself.”

“I can just picture a tiny you making threats on the playground.” That’s actually pretty accurate.

“He’s my brother. That’s what you do for each other.” There really isn’t a whole lot I wouldn’t do for Mike if he needed it. “It wasn’t one sided either. I was a terrible student, but he was always there to help me. He used to stay up all night with me studying, or helping me with homework, or going over a paper I had to write. He’d explain things over and over until I finally got it. He wanted to make sure I didn’t fuck anything up t oo badly.”

“He sounds like a good brother.” Yeah, Mikey’s the best . Usually.

“He also once told me, ‘I refuse to have a dumb jock for a twin,’ so I’m not sure he was being entirely selfless.” Khazak’s smiling, a hint of something else behind his eye s. “What?”

“You get excited when you talk about your brother.” His head tilts, like he’s figuring me out. “It is rather e ndearing.”

That has me blushing. Time to shift the focus off of me. “What about you and your sister? Are you a l ot alike?”

“When we were younger. We also liked to do everything together. Fishing, hunting, fighting—we were very competitive. Something our parents did their best not to encourage. I think they believed we were trying to outdo one another, but it was really more about pushing each other further. If we made a bet, there was never a sore loser. Although we still managed to find ways to get on each other’ s nerves.”

“I figured that was a given with all siblings.” His chuckle that tells me he knows what I mean. “Do you have an y others?”

“Two younger brothers and a younger sister. Yogik, Ignatz, and Ursza.” He holds up three fingers as he names th em. “You?”

“Older brother and younger sister. Joseph and Kira.” So we both come from big families.

“Are you also close with them?” He pushes his plate to the side, our lunch forgotten as we share ou r stories.

“Not really. I looked up to my brother a lot when I was little, but I grew out of it. My little sister is...a little sister. I could be anywhere from completely annoyed to super overprotective with her. Shit, her birthday is next month.” She will not be happy I missed it. Or that I didn’t get her a present.

“It may take a while to reach her, but you could always write to her,” Khazak offers a perfectly reasonable solution.

“I’ll think about it.” I already know I’m not going to take him up on it, but there is something else I need. “So, since our fish is cold, and I’m meeting your family tonight... Do you think I could finally get the haircut I’ve been aski ng about?”

“Yes, David, we can get you a haircut.” With a huff of laughter, Khazak stands and grabs our plates. Time to get c leaned up.

The sun has already started to set by the time we start our journey to Khazak’s parent’s house. We just left the barber after giving my hair a fresh trim. Nothing fancy: short on the sides and evened out top, same as I’ve gotten for years. I prefer my haircuts low maintenance, especially when I’m not sure when my next one might be. Khazak paid of course, but I’m thinking I may need to take him up on that offer to find a job so I can pull my own weight a little for the next two months and start saving up.

“We have arrived.” We come to a stop in front of a home that looks like a large version of our own, all stone and wood . “Ready?”

“I think so.” It’s just dinn er, right?

With a nod, Khazak leans forward to knock, and a few moments later, the door swin gs inward.

“Khazak” is the only intelligible thing I make out when the orc on the other side starts speaking, but hey, kind of impressive I even got that.

As we walk inside for a second, I think that the orc greeting us is Khazak’s doppelganger. Same height, same hair, same build. But when he turns to me, I notice the small differences. His hair and beard are more salt-and-pepper than black, and the lines on his face run deeper. This must be h is father.

It’s my turn to be spoken to, but I don’t understand any of it because it’s in Orcish. “No, father, he cann ot speak—”

“Well, I hope you are taking care of that,” he tells his son before turning back to me, hand outstretched. “Orlun I ronstorm.”

“David Ceranooooff—” I’m pulled into a hug when I reach my hand out.

“A little on the scrawny side.” The comment is spoken over my shoulder as I’m placed back on the ground. “Nothing we cannot fix. It is nice to meet yo u, David.”

“Nice to meet you too...” Shit , what am I supposed to call him? Orlun? Mr. Ironstorm? That’s gonna get confusing. “Sir.” Aaaaand that was e ven worse.

“Word around the city is that you and my son have been quite busy.” He looks between the two of us expectantly and my face heats. Of course, everyone here has probably heard about...e verything.

“Orda, I wante d to ask—”

“Sorry, I am still needed in the kitchen.” Orlun cuts off his son again as he walks backward through an open doorway, pointing to his left. “Your sister and brother are in the den. Go introdu ce David.”

“Yes, sir,” Khazak tells the empty room with a sigh. “This wa y, David.”

We walk through the doorway into a large but cozy looking room. A lot of chairs, a couple of couches, and an already lit fireplace in the corner. There are two orcs talking animatedly, who pause at ou r arrival.

“Brother!” they shout in unison before turning into a three-or c pile-up.

“David, this is my sister Ayla and my brother Yogik.” I’m pulled in for two more hugs. Are all orcs this huggy or is it just h is family?

“About time you brought him over.” Yogik crosses arms while he looks me up and down. “You did not even let anyone know you received the challenge. Some of us could have be en there.”

“Don’t be weird, Yog.” Ayla slugs her brother in the shoulder. “It’s nice to meet yo u, David.”

“Nice to meet you too.” I like her. She’s another big one, just like her twin and dad, with the same brown eyes and jet-black hair pulled into a short ponytail. I notice a number of different piercings adorning both her ears. Yogik, a few inches shorter and much leaner, lets me know that not everyone in this family is a giant. In this light, his eyes have a slight green tinge to them and his dark brown hair almost reaches his shoulders. All of us are dressed pretty casually—cloth shirts and pants—except Ayla, who looks like she’s ready for or just came in from a hike that included some mountain climbing.

“When did you get in, Ayla?” Khazak asks his sister across our four-pers on circle.

“Right before lunch.” Arguably one of the best times to arrive.

“Why are you still dressed like that?” He sounds oddly accusatory, nodding down at her leathers.

“What do you mean? These are the only clothes I have,” she defends. Sounds fair to me. Does he not remember my own clothing situation?

“You did not bring a change? Are you sure this is not just an excuse to launch into some long-winded tale about where you have been?” Okaaayyy , did not see th at coming.

“Are you seriously going to—”

“ So Dave , what do you think of the city so far?” Yogik cuts in with the force and precision of a guy who’s had to break up his fair share of sibling arguments.

“Oh, uh, it’s really nice. Not what I expected.” Wait, that isn’t a compliment. “In a good way.”

“Has Khaz taken you to the Shadrok Springs yet?” Ayla turns to ask me.

I knew that nickname was a thing. “No, he hasn—”

“He has only been here for a week , Ayla,” Khazak cu ts me off.

“Spirits help me,” Yogik mutters so quietly I almost don’t catch it before turning behind him to shout for backup. “Ursza! Ignatz! Come out here and meet Dave.” I wince when the unwanted nickname is u sed again.

Two more orcs enter the room, a male and a female, closer in build to Yogik than his larger siblings. The first thing I notice on the girl is her hair—it’s short, shaved on the sides, and bright purple . So are her eyes, which I’m positive isn’t a natural thing, even for orcs. The brother has similarly altered his appearance, though his color of choice is blue. Between their ears and noses, I count more piercings than I’ve seen on every other orc combined. They look the same age, or at least close to it. And that’s when I realize what they are.

Teenage rs. Oh no.

Our circle widens to accommodate the new additions, who immediately look at me before turning to each other to speak in Orcish.

“Come on. You know he doesn’t speak Atasi .” Yeah, I don’t speak that word she just said.

“Ursza, Ignatz, this is Dave.” Yogik makes the introductions while both teens stare at me silently.

“It’s David, actually,” I correct him. I really do not like being called Dave. I can tell Yogik wants to ask me about it but gets distracted by something behind me. I turn and see another orc entering the room.

“Khazak, it is so good to see you.” The new guy embraces Khazak. Wait, I thought there were only two brothers. Have I miscounted the men? “This must be David. I am Jarek.” Oof, another hug. Upon closer inspection, no, this guy looks a little older. Short black hair, medium build, small goatee and mustache.

“It is nice to meet you.” He doesn’t give me the chance to respond before turning to the rest of the group. “Dinner will be ready in a few minutes.” And then he’s gone.

“I’m sorry, but who was that?” I ask after the orc’s sp eedy exit.

“That was Jarek, our father,” Yogik answers. W ait, what?

“He is really more of a stepfather to myself and Ayla,” Khazak explains. “But we do not think of him any dif ferently.”

Ayla is quick to correct him. “Please, you hated him when we wer e little.”

“I did not hate him. He was new and I was having a hard time adjusting to him being here,” Khazak growls through his gritted teeth. Okay, I think I understand what’s goi ng on now.

“Sorry, I thought Orlun was everyone’s father.” I guess the family stayed close after Khazak’s mom and dad split.

“He is.” Ursza speaks her first words to me, rolling her eyes in the process. Now I’m l ost again.

“So why don’t you like being called Dave , Dave?” Okay, now Yogik’s doing it just to pi ss me off.

“I just don’t.” Five pairs of eyes stare at me in silence, expecting more of an answer. Dammit . I sigh. “My dad goes by Dave, so I just prefer David.” Let’s leave it at tha t, please.

“You were named after your father?” Khazak’s voice questions fro m my left.

“Yeah. I’m technically David Cerano Jr.,” I answer then turn my head back to everyone else. “Sorry, can we go back to Orlun and Jarek both being your father? You have two fathers?”

“ No ,” Ignatz scoffs, even more exasperated than his sister, but there’s an odd look on his face. He knows something. “We ha ve three.”

W ait, what ?

“You have three fathers?” I look between the five of them, confused.

“Yes, Orlun, Rurig, and Jarek.” Yogik lists them off like it’s the simplest thing he’s ever done. Which it pr obably is.

“I feel like I’m missing something.” Like how many times their mom got remarried.

“Why did you not tell me you were named after your father?” Khazak asks before anyone can clarify thin gs for me.

I’m sorry, I’m standing here struggling to remember half-a-dozen new names and faces, getting bombarded with both piles of new information and personal questions, all while his two youngest siblings treat me like the world’s dumbest foreign exchange student, and that’s what he’s focused on? Are you fucking k idding me?

“I don’t know. Why didn’t you tell me you had three fucking dads? ” I spit out in fr ustration.

The room goes silent. Everyone’s staring at me. And also kind of behind me. Ursza and Ignatz look like they’re trying to hold in their laughter. I turn and am greeted by the sight of Orlun, Jarek, and a shorter, stouter orc—I’m guessing Rurig—who have just entered the room. Probably to tell us dinner is rea dy. Great .

“I’m sorry. That was very rude,” I say to them as calmly and politely as I can before slowly turning to face Khazak. “Can we talk somewhere in private?”

“So th at was...”

“A shitshow?” I finish Khazak’ s thought.

“I was going to say interesting.” He frowns.

“I agree. It was a very interesting shitshow.” The two of us are standing in his childhood bedroom. It’s not as exciting as I would have hoped. A bed, a bookshelf, a couple of bows on the wall. He was a real par ty animal.

“You may have overreacted to the news about my parentage,” he offers, taking a seat o n his bed.

“My mistake. I must have been distracted by how close you and your sister are.” I stand in the center of the room facing him, arm s crossed.

“Our relationship may be a little more...strained than I let on.” He rubs the back of his neck.

“And you don’t think having three fathers was something worth mentioning?” Just a heads up would have been nic e, really.

“It did not seem important.” I give him a look. Really? “Honestly. It is not that uncommon here to have a family arrangement l ike ours.”

“How come you never mentioned it?” I really feel like this should have come up before. “I distinctly remember you saying ‘father,’ not ‘ fathers.’”

“I truly never thought about it.” He looks a little sheepish at least. “It has always been norma l for me.”

“Doesn’t calling three different people “father” get confusing?” Maybe someone goes by dad or pops or something.

He shakes his head no. “In our language the word for mother or father changes based on the person. Orlun is Orda, Rurig is Ruda. Jarek is—”

“Jarda?” Yay, pattern games. I have more pressing questions. “Okay, so, how did it happen? Do you have a mother? Wait, can male orcs get pregnant?” My eyes go wide and my hands shoot to my stomach in shock. “Can they get other men p regnant?!”

“You are not pregnant, David.” Khazak laughs deep from his belly. “My fathers, Orlun and Rurig, met when they were serving on our militia. After their service ended, they wanted to start a family. I have... You might call them aunts? Not blood related, but they were friends of my fathers, women who also desired a family. So arrangements were made to help each other. Ayla and I were the first born, then my cousin Korra, then Yogik... You get the idea. When Ayla and I were eight and Yogik was three, my fathers met Jarek, and he became part of the family as well. Ursza and Ignatz were each born a few years af ter that.”

“And you hated him.” I remember his sister teasing him about it.

“I did not hate him. I was eight years old, and it was a difficult period in my life,” he grumbles before standing and walking over to me. “I am sorry for not explain things to you earlier.”

“It’s okay.” I close the distance between us, tugging on his shirt a little. “I’m sorry for freaking out like that in front of you r family.”

He smiles. “Are you ready to go back o ut there?”

“Oh no. We’re not going back out there.” I shake my head and step back.

“What do you mean?” He tilts his head.

“See that window?” I point to the wall behind him. “We’re climbing out that, going home, and pretending like none of this ever happened.”

“David.” I know that tone.

“What? You can not expect me to go back there after all that.” I wave my hand at the room we just left.

“It will be fine, David. Maybe a little embarrassing, but I have seen you survive worse.” That might be up for debate. “You just needed a moment in private to collect yourself.”

“And for you to explain yourself.” I grumble and recross my arms. “Besides it’s not like this is that private.”

“What, you think my family is eavesdropping on us?” He sarcastically waves around the room at all th e nothing.

I look at him like he’s dumb. “ Of course they’re eavesdroppi ng on us.”

“Why would you think that?” Oh you sweet s imple man.

“Because that’s what you do when your brother brings home a complete stranger who freaks out in your living room about how many dads you have!” I’m panting a little when I finish my short rant. “Why are you looking at me like that?” He’s wearing a really go ofy smile.

“You are cute when you are frustrated.” He brushes a thumb along my beard.

“...I’m going out the window.” I start walking t owards it.

“David.” He grabs my wrist, laughing as he pulls me into him. “I am sorry.”

I sigh. “I still think we should at least consider th e window.”

He doesn’t answer, but he does give me a soft kiss. “Are you ready fo r dinner?”

“I guess.” We separate and turn to the door, but I pause. “Hold on.”

I motion for Khazak to stay where he is and remain quiet as I tiptoe to the door. Once I’m in position, I carefully reach for the knob, quickly grabbing it and flinging it open. Immediately the sounds of two adolescent bodies tripping over themselves echo in from the hallway as they scramble to get away from the door.

I give Khazak my best “told-ya-so” look. Time to get the rest of this shitshow on the road.