Chapter 6

6

DAWSON

After Jem ran out on me, I stared at the back of the dressing room door in disbelief. How had I screwed things up so fucking quickly?

I hadn’t meant to say it was a mistake. Kissing him could never be a damned mistake.

But fucking on the floor at work? That had been a huge mistake. What if someone had walked in? What if we’d been fired? This job was a dream come true for both of us. I wouldn’t have been able to forgive myself if I’d been the cause of Jem losing his place here.

After giving Jem time to catch his breath and calm down, I went looking for him with no luck. He was avoiding me, which made sense, but by the time the five-minute warning came before the show, I still hadn’t seen him anywhere.

Had I upset him that much? Had my revelation of his mother’s identity in the interview followed by the mind-blowing sixty-nine in the dressing room pushed him back into hating me? Would it have been enough to make him miss the show?

When Jem’s understudy nudged me with his elbow and whispered that he was going on in Jem’s place tonight, I felt sick.

“Where’s Jem?” I hissed back.

Isaac’s eyes widened. “Dunno, man. Just heard he had to go.”

My heart hammered as I searched the faces backstage for anyone who might have more information. When I spotted the stage manager, I quickly approached her to ask what was up with Jem.

“Family emergency,” she said. “Didn’t say what, but the man lit outta here like his ass was on fire.”

My stomach tightened with nerves. I didn’t even have Jem’s cell number in my phone. Within seconds, the curtain was up, and we were off to the races. The show—or maybe it was me—seemed off by half a beat the whole night. When it came time for me to kiss Isaac, he missed the mark, knocking my shoulder almost hard enough to push me down. I went with it and fell, rolling into a backwards somersault and popping back up on my feet before dusting my hands off proudly as if I’d meant to do that.

The audience loved it. But not as much as they loved the kiss.

I knew how they felt.

The show lasted a million hours. When the curtain finally came down, I raced to the dressing room to change and clean up as fast as I could before finding one of the guys in wardrobe who knew Jem.

“Chris, do you have Jem’s number?” I asked as several crew members hustled past on their way home for the night.

“Yeah, man. What’s up? Where’d he go?” Chris pulled out his phone to bring up the number. “All I heard was he was at the hospital and not to expect him home till super late, if at all.”

It was none of my business. I knew that. But I couldn’t help but want to find him and make sure he was okay.

“Family emergency. I don’t know more than that. Wait,” I said as Chris’s words sank in. “You two live together?” Chris lived in the apartment next door to me. I would have known if Jem lived next door too. Wouldn’t I?

“Not like that,” he said with a soft chuckle. “Jem, me, Kota, and Lars share the place. You haven’t seen him around the building? He’s been there a few weeks now, I guess. Took Taylor’s place.”

I felt like an idiot for jumping to conclusions because I’d known there were a bunch of them who shared that apartment.

Jem lives next door.

I couldn’t believe my luck. Even if I couldn’t track Jem down, I could wait up for him.

Chris gave me his number before grabbing his backpack and leaving the theater. I quickly pulled my own stuff together and texted Jem.

Me: It’s Dawson. Where are you?

When I didn’t get a response after twenty minutes, I went on home and decided to wait for him there. After showering and throwing on pajama pants and an old hoodie, I propped open my apartment door while I made something to eat and poured a glass of wine.

The waiting was impossible. I itched with worry and frustration. Why did I care this much about him and whatever the hell his family had going on? I barely knew him. And how selfish was I for even thinking he’d accept my offer of comfort or a listening ear when he got home? For all I knew, he had someone else. His sister or one of his roommates. But what if his sister was the one at the hospital?

I paced back and forth until I’d talked myself into leaving him alone. I went to close the door to my apartment and lock up for the night, and that’s when I saw him trudging up the stairs to our landing. He looked exhausted and alone. I froze in a moment of indecision. Every fiber of my being wanted to go to him, wrap him up in my arms and tell him how sorry I was and that I would be whatever he needed, even if just for one night.

But the words piled up behind my teeth.

Jem looked up and saw me standing there. His eyes widened in surprise. Clearly, I hadn’t been the only one oblivious to our shared address.

Our eyes locked for a long breath before his face crumpled. There wasn’t a word spoken; we both simply moved toward the other in the span of the next breath until his nose was pressed into the side of my neck and my arms tightened around his back.

I let out a breath and squeezed my eyes closed to inhale the familiar city scent of him.

For now, it was enough.