Chapter 12

Cole

I knew ordering all that new shit online the other day was going to be a game changer. I just didn’t think we’d be using any of it so soon. I’m not complaining. Might as well get my kinks all out on the table the first time I have her over, right?

Not gonna lie. I was a little scared she’d freak on me.

Yeah, we experimented with some of this stuff back in the day, but I wanted to get really damn good at being a Dom, for myself, and for my sub. In college, Haley opened a pandora’s box inside me and when she left, she might have taken my heart with her, but she left me with all my desire and a penchant for punishments and rewards. Wearing a mask is heavy on my list of likes, too. It puts a barrier between me and my sub and gives me an opportunity to get out of my head.

Bonus points for the fucktoy fun.

Haley and I once spent two weeks with her as my fucktoy. She wore this little beaded bracelet on her wrist that was my permission to use her however I wanted. No questions asked. Nothing in return. I could take her in the laundry room, the football field, her bed, my house, the car, the janitor’s closet. Wherever. I’d fuck her face, her tits, her ass, and pussy. I used her however I wanted and got off as many times as I physically could. Hell, I even crashed some of her classes and pulled her out of them just to sneak us into a closet so she could suck my dick.

And though the pleasure was supposed to be all mine with that bracelet back then, I will always stand by rule number one: If a man doesn’t give, he sure as hell doesn’t get. I made Haley come as many times as I could before chasing my own release.

I take care of what’s mine.

When the bracelet came off, the game was over.

The collar I bought her is a much bigger version of that bracelet. I’m glad she enjoyed being leashed. She was fucking hot in it.

After we clean up in the shower, I dry her off first and take care of myself last. It’s already dark out, and I’m suddenly exhausted.

“I should get going,” Haley says, after redressing.

My stomach drops. I don’t want her to go. “Stay.”

She tucks her hair behind her ears. “I can’t. I’ve got so much work to do, it’s not even funny.” Then her eyes widen. “I forgot to show you!” She excitedly digs her phone out of her big bag and taps her finger on the screen. “I booked the Gantz Plaza for your party. It was a miracle that it was available. They asked if a Wednesday worked, I took it. You said it didn’t matter what night it was on.” She looks up at me. “I hope that’s okay.”

I clear my throat. “Yeah. I don’t think it matters.”

“Well, usually it would. People are busy and it’s the holiday season. Weeknights are rough.”

“Not as rough as weekends.”

“That’s what I was thinking.” Haley holds her phone out. “Here’s the theme I’m going with.”

There’s a bunch of white lights and trees and snowflakes and stuff. “Looks great.” What else can I say? It looks like a big, white, elegant party.

“You don’t like it.” She takes her phone back, looking like she just got sucker-punched in the gut. “I… I can change it up. It’s not too late. I’ll cancel the orders I’ve placed and—”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa.” I rub her arms. “I didn’t mean it like that. What you have is amazing. And I know damn well you’re going to put together a banging party for my company. It’s just hard for me to envision it all. Even with the pictures.”

Her shoulders drop and she tilts her head to the side. “Cole, you literally walk into an empty room and can re-design the whole ass place and put it to paper.”

“I can work with what people give me as their vision within the parameters of an existing building. I don’t have the chops to design an entire blank space and turn it into a building.”

“Bullshit,” she snaps. “That’s total fucking bullshit.” Her eyes narrow and she shoves a finger in my face. “Who told you that? I’m gonna cut out their tongues.”

God love her.

She’s not far off the mark, either. “I’ve been busting my ass for three years at NGC and they never take my designs.” I keep trying, but the rejection feels worse and worse with each submission. “The shit part is, when we have a new client, I get my hopes up that this will be my big break. Hell, I just submitted a design to put in a brand-new Marine Life Center, spent months working on the concept, and handed it to my boss for submission, even when I know I will not get it.”

“Why do you think that?”

“Because I never do.” Isn’t she listening? “My ideas aren’t what people want, I guess. They’re not good enough.”

Haley wraps her arms around my middle and hugs me. “Well, I’m proud of you for not giving up. And fuck anyone who doesn’t like your concepts. They’re stupid people with shit taste. You’re more than good enough, Cole. You’re too good. Too good for NGC, I know that much.”

I appreciate the hype, but it doesn’t matter. Constant rejection tells me where I stand on skill level. It is what it is.

“Promise me something?” She looks up at me. Damn, she’s so beautiful. “Promise me you’ll keep trying. Someone out there will appreciate your vision, Cole. You’re such a talented architect.” She playfully shrugs her shoulders. “I mean, I only hire the best to work with, and I hired you soooo, clearly, you’re the greatest architect in the whole wide world. I’d settle for nothing less.”

I’m not telling Haley I’m designing her office for free. She wouldn’t like the handout. But she’s not listed in our database, and I didn’t have her sign a contract.

She’s right. I just have to keep my head high and try harder to climb the ranks of success. I should be grateful I got the job I have, and I really love my work. I just wish more clients liked my concepts. They don’t even give feedback on what they hate about them.

This past year was the hardest yet. Three potential builders all shot my designs down. Noah said to not take it personally, but that’s easier said than done. Each time, someone else in the company got the job instead. I mean, hey, good for them, man. That’s great. But it still hurts my pride. Their concepts were basic and lazy, in my opinion. If you’re going to build something, make it fucking amazing.

I’ve been working with smaller clients this year, and also my brother Trey when he needs me, just so I can feel less of a failure. I guess my talents are in revamping existing floor plans, not erecting something out of nothing. One has my heart. The other has my soul.

“Your ideas for the company party look phenomenal,” I say, bringing the focus back to her. “I can’t wait to see it come to life.”

Haley’s expression softens. “Trust me. I’m going to blow this out of the park.”

“Damn straight you will. I only hire the best.”

“Touché.” She drags me down for another kiss and blood rushes to my dick. Then her stomach growls. Loudly.

“Damn girl, you got a goblin in there or what?”

“Ugh, I’ve been running ragged all day. I kept meaning to stop and eat and never did.”

Then she came home with me.

“What do you want?” I pull her into my kitchen and open the fridge. “I can make spaghetti, Alfredo, some lemony parmesan cream sauce?” Basically, all I have that’s quick to make is pasta.

“No, it’s fine. I really should get going.”

It’s not fine and I don’t want her to go. “You sure you can’t stay for a little while longer? I can order food to be delivered, or we can go out someplace.”

“Cole.” She sighs. “I’m not running.”

“I know.”

Do I though?

I’m starting to think that’s why I just got too clingy for my own fucking good. All this week we haven’t seen each other, but her texts come through like little blips of hope, and part of me fears this is all just temporary and something will make her disappear again.

Shit. “I’m turning into a level five clinger, aren’t I?”

“No.” Haley giggles, tossing her hair and batting her lashes at me. “You’re just obsessed with me.”

She’s not wrong. “Can you blame me?”

My girl’s playfulness vanishes. “I get it,” she says, softly. “It seems too good to be true. Us, I mean. We’re too good to be true. For us to pick up instantly where we left off seems surreal.”

I nod, my throat tightening.

Haley cautiously laces her fingers with mine. “Come home with me. I want to show you something.”