5. Just Play it Cool

Five

Just Play itCool

Hailey

“Miss Emery?”

“Yes?” I don’t understand this holdup. Especially since I’d been headed for the exit faster than you can say my-friend-embarrassed-the-crap-out-of-me-last-night. But I turn around again at the doorman’s prompt.

His eyes gleam with amusement. “Mr. Eriksson requests that you drop off the package yourself. He won’t accept delivery, otherwise.”

I groan aloud. Why now? The November wind whipped my hair into the shape of a large shrubbery on the way overhere.

The doorman holds out the bag and I take it. As I stomp toward the gleaming bank of elevators I hear him say, “She’ll be rightup.”

You know how an elevator tugs on your belly when the car begins to rise? Today the tug is followed by a wave of full-on panic. My palms start to sweat, and the plastic bag from Whole Foods grows slick in myhand.

I’m about to come face-to-face with Matt Eriksson, the man I’ve secretly crushed on since I watched his first NHL game in college.

The ding of the elevator arriving on his floor sends a spark of nerves shooting throughout my body. I step out and walk a few paces to his door. I hear voices inside—the high pitch of a little girl’s giggle, and then Rufus’s friendlywoof.

Okay, Hailey. Just play itcool.

I raise my hand to knock, but the door jerks open and I miss. My arm falls clumsily down to my side as a little girl throws the door wide open. “Hi! Did you bring waffles? Daddy always orders stuff.”

“That is not true!” a male voice argues, and the rough timbre of it sends tingles down my spine. “Who makes the best sausage in the world?”

“Mommy says sausage has too much sodium,” another little voice says from inside. “What’s sodium?”

“It’s... Libby? Did you open thedoor?”

I’m just standing there like a mannequin, trying to make sense of the chaos. And then the doorway is filled by anotherbody.

A big body. Specifically a broad, bare chest with rippling muscles all over it. I mean, they are actively rippling. It’s fascinating. I didn’t know anyone had pecs that well defined in real life. And abs like my great-grandma’s antique washboard. Holyshit.

Now the abs are shaking a littlebit.

“Hottie?” someone says with a chuckle.

“Mmm?” I finally wrest my gaze away from that glorious tummy and look up. But then I’m blindsided by those cool, searching eyes. Mr. Freeze gets me again, and I’m solidified into a statue of a deliverygirl.

“Did I get it right? Does HTE stand for hottie?”

The weird question penetrates my stupor, but only halfway. “N-no,” I stammer. “Hailey Taylor Emery,” I rattle off like an automaton.

“Nice to meet you, Hailey Taylor Emery.” He thrusts out a hand to shake, and I manage to grasp it. But the dry warmth of his hand against mine is kind of mind blowing. Matt Eriksson is holding my hand. He made thirty-two goals last year with this hand. And it’s attached to the body that stars in all my dirtiest fantasies.

And now I realize I’m clutching his hand awkwardly. So I drop it they way you’d let go of an electric fence you’d accidentally grabbed—suddenly and with great force.

That’s when Rufus spots me. First there’s a great woof of joy, then the scrambling of toenails on polished wood. He takes out the four-year-old in his way like an eager bowling ball knocking aside a pin. He pushes into the hallway, his whole body shaking with excitement.

My brain is still sludgy with lust, so I don’t immediately give Rufus the love he demands. The dog is forced to take matters into his own paws. He rears up, setting his paws on my hips. His considerable bulk catches me off balance. Or maybe I’m still reeling from the proximity to Matt Eriksson. But I lose my balance and go down in a heap on the plush carpeting of the hallway.

“Oof,” I manage before Rufus licks myface.

“Jesus,” Matt breathes. “Off, Ruf. Let the poor girl alone.” He shoves the dog aside. “Are youokay?”

I make a garbled noise of assent. Something like “yrrm,” because now he’s looming over me, godlike, and that fine chest is all I can see. He has a dusting of dark hair that thickens to a happy trail as it enters his low-slung sweatpants.

And I’m staring again.

I slam my eyes shut and roll to the side, scrambling to my feet while my cheeks burn with discomfort. Rufus has run off again, most likely in search of his leash.

“Daddy?” says the little girl who’d opened the door. “Are we having waffles now? I’m hungry.” She tugs on hishand.

“Here,” I say, grabbing the bag with the waffle mix off the floor where it’s fallen, thrusting it toward him. I’ve got to get out of here and regroup for a minute or maybe a year. And after that I’ll probably look for another job somewhere else. A good distance from Matt Eriksson, probably. Like, Tahiti would almost be far enoughaway.

He slips the bag over his wrist. Then he leans down and scoops his preschool-aged daughter onto his hip. She slides her arms around his neck and lays one soft cheek on his bare shoulder.

Pop, pop!That sound you’re hearing is both my ovaries exploding.

“Thank you,” he rumbles. “Sorry it’s such chaos here.” Then he smiles and my IQ drops another five points. “What did you think of the game last night?”

“It was awesome,” I say truthfully. It’s my first successful sentence since I stepped onto his floor. “Great offensive communication during the second period. Really generated some nice chances.”

When his eyes widen with amusement, I realize that my inner hockey wonk has found a brand-new way to embarrass me. “Anyway. I’ll run along unless there’s anything you need.” Like my naked body in your bed, for example. Something about standing near this man makes me think very un-Hailey-like thoughts.

“There’s another overnighter coming up,” he says, his big hand patting his daughter’s back. “I’ll send Rufus to the doggy ranch for the long road trips. But if you could walk him Sunday evening and Monday late morning, that would be great.”

“Okay.” I’d do anything he asked of me. Sad but true. “Sunday I should be available…” I try to gather a couple of brain cells together, but his scruffy jaw makes it difficult. My hand itches to reach out and touch those bristly hairs and test their texture under my fingers. “...around sex thirty or seven.”

His eyes crinkle at the corners, so, in my brain, I rewind what I’ve justsaid.

“Six thirty or seven,” I correct. Abort, abort! I need to get the hell out of here. This man has hungry children to feed, and I’m practically drooling on his doormat. I’m worse than Rufus. “Gotta go. Nice chat,” I stammer, backingaway.

“Later, Hailey,” he calls as I turn to leap for the elevator button.

“G-bye!” I manage before I hear the beautiful sound of an apartment door finally closing. I’m sweaty and almost panting from the difficulty of keeping it together in front of the world’s hottest hockey player. As I step into the elevator, my phone buzzes with atext.

I’m afraid to look, but when I do, it’s only Jenny. WELL? she demands. Did you bring the man his gluten free waffles? Did you invite yourself in for breakfast and a quickie?

You’re hilarious, I reply. Could you please Google job openings in Tahiti?

The next twodays pass slowly. I spend them trying not to relive my mortifying encounter with the hunky God of Hockey. So much for playing it cool. Clearly my divorce messed with my head and did a number on my confidence—the old Hailey had no trouble flirting with cute men, although any flirting I’d ever done was harmless since I was married for half mylife.

Jenny’s advice that I should get out there again and start dating isn’t wrong. But I need to start small, with a guy who doesn’t turn me into a babbling idiot.

Putting our awkward encounter aside isn’t going to be easy because I have to return to the scene of the crime. When I go to walk Rufus on Sunday night, I feel a little sweaty just stepping off the elevator on the third floor.

Of course, there’s nobody home except one dog. And he still loves me. I scratch his ears and try not to think of anything I said the other day when I stood in the hallway losing mymind.

Ugh.

We have a nice time together before I take him home again. One more walk is probably all I have, too. Matt had said something about sending him to the doggy ranch when the team goes on road trips.

When Monday comes, I have to face up to the other awkwardness in my life. I’ve been avoiding Jackson at work, but my luck runs out eventually.

“Got a minute?” he calls as I’m darting for the door midmorning.

Crap.

“Sure,” I say, although it really isn’t true. I’m supposed to walk Rufus, but since I don’t want Jackson to know that, I follow him into his office and sit across fromhim.

“How’ve you been?” he asks, a smile on his narrow face. I can’t help comparing him to my hockey idol, and it really isn’t a fair fight. Jackson is a little geeky, but he’s a great guy. I feel guilty noticing how scrawny his neck looks poking from above the tidy collar of his dress shirt.

“I’m well,” I lie. “You?”

He smiles again, and I glimpse a little flash of why I’ll always love him. Kindness radiates from him like sunshine at high noon. “Can’t complain. How’s the mobile app upgrade coming along?”

“Not bad at all. Should have it ready for beta before Christmas. Giving our subcontractor an ultimatum finally did the trick.”

Jackson winces. “I’m glad they didn’twalk.”

“I knew they wouldn’t.” This is why I deal with the programmers. Jax is smart as hell, but he can’t play hardball. I fill him in on our progress, and he asks a few questions that I’ll need to follow upon.

“Thanks for handling all this,” he says, adjusting the position of his pencil so that it aligns perfectly with the blotter on his desktop. “We’ll need a few favorite customers to beta this version. Do you have anyone inmind?”

He’s right, and I haven’t gotten around to figuring that part out yet. Probably because I only have one specific client in mind at all times. “Good point. I’ll get right on that.” It’s a struggle not to check my watch. But I can’t tell Jackson where I’m off to, because it violates company policy.

Next, he shows me some photographs he’s taken of holiday promotional items. “I think I’ve got the giftwrap concept right,” he says, pointing at a lovely photo of a box wrapped in white paper with silver stripes. “We’ll let the clients choose the color of the ribbon that’s appropriate to the holiday they’re celebrating. I ordered blue, red, and silver.”

“That’s beautiful,” I tell him. “So I’ll add those ribbon colors to the giftwrap menu.” I grab my phone out of my pocket and tap a note to myself. Jackson is the artistic half of this endeavor. While I run the technical aspects of the business, he’s the one who designs our website, our branding, and all our communications with clients.

He’s also the one who put my picture on the web portal. We took that shot five years ago when we couldn’t even afford a photographer to help us. It was his idea to put that red pencil in my teeth, the one that matches the text in ourlogo.

“Anything else?” I ask, hoping he’ll sayno.

My ex tips his head to the side, looking thoughtful. “My dad had me look at a piece of real estate in the Bridle Path neighborhood. With expansion inmind.”

Just like that, my stomach tightens.

“But I’m not sure we’re ready for that, right?” Jackson asks. “Not before our new app launches.”

“Right…” I say slowly, trying to read between the lines. “But, uh, I know you want to expand.”

He frowns just slightly. “Expansion is a pretty crucial way to grow the bottom line. But we need to be fully prepared to take that on. Right now we’re finally in a place where we can almost take a breath. Expansion will put us right back in scramblemode.”

“Hmm,” I say, trying to guess at the subtext of this conversation. “If you need scramble, I can scramble.” I will show no weakness! If he wants me to leave the company, he’s going to have to come out and sayit.

“I’m going to mull it over,” he says instead.

“Okay,” I answer, springing out of my chair. “Is there anythingelse?”

Slowly, he shakes hishead.

“Later!” I say with false cheer, then sprint for the exit. And even though I know Jackson’s not chasing me down the street, I keep it at a jog all the way to Matt’s apartment building. (Is it weird that in my head we’re on a first-name basis?)

Rufus is as happy to see me this morning as he was last night. I take him to the nearby park where there’s a dog run and let him off the leash. He knows me well enough now that he’ll come when I call, so I’m not worried that I’ll end up chasing him around the place when it’s time togo.

Plus I bought him a gourmet doggy treat on my way into the office this morning, just in case this is our last time together.

While he sniffs butts and socializes in the dog enclosure, I spend time solving a couple of problems in the office by texting instructions to Dion. Before long my hands are freezing and I’ve lost track of time. “Come on, Ruf!” I call. “Time to go! Want a cookie?”

He comes running when he sees the treat, and I clip on his collar while he’s bolting it down. We walk back to Yorkville Avenue at a nice clip, and I’m humming to myself when I beep into Matt’s apartment.

“Sit,” I tell Rufus when we get inside. “Good boy.” I drop down to my knees, and he wags his tail when we make eye contact. “Yes, you’re a very handsome boy.” I give him a kiss on the nose. I unclip him, and he wags some more, probably wondering whether I have any more of those treats. My hands undoubtedly smell like doggy biscuit. “Sorry, pal. I gave up all the goods already.”

“Did you, now?” a low voice asks, and I nearly leap out of myskin.

My heart spasms with surprise as I whip around to see Matt Eriksson standing in front of his kitchen island grinning atme.