17. Crumbs

Seventeen

Crumbs

Hailey

Wakingup in Matt’s bed is startling.

It’s not his naked body beside me that’s a surprise. I felt his heat all night long. Best thingever.

The startling part is the light knock on the door. “Daddy! Time for waffles.”

“Grrmf,” he says into the pillow.

There’s a moment of silence before the knocking begins again. “I’ll make ’em if you don’t!”

That gets him moving. I get a quick kiss and an apology. “I’ll start the coffee. Take your time,” he insists. “Take whatever you want from the medicine cabinet.”

“’Kay,” I manage.

After he disappears, closing the door behind him, I get up and hurry into his bathroom. I decide he won’t mind if I borrow his fabulous walk-in shower, with three jets and a heated towelbar.

I shower and braid my hair so it doesn’t resemble a sex do. His medicine cabinet has a few of those airline toothbrushes, and I help myself.

When I’m nearly presentable, I put on my jeans. But my top is crumpled like a tissue on the floor. I should have hung it up last night. It looks ridiculous so I peek into his closet (the mirror causing me to blush) and borrow a flannel shirt.

And it smells like him. Gah! I’m such a goner.

“Nice shirt,” he says quietly when he hands me a cup of black coffee a few minutes later.

“Mine looked likehell.”

He smirks at me. “That looks better on you than it ever looked on me.” He kisses my neck surreptitiously, and it reminds me of last night, when wewere…

“Hailey?” Libby asks me. “Can you braid my hair like yours? Daddy can’t do girl stuff.”

“Oh. Sure,” I say, stepping away from her daddy before I maul him. “Do you have a hair tie and acomb?”

She runs off to findthem.

“You don’t have to do that,” he says, breaking an egg into a mixingbowl.

“I don’t mind at all. Easiest thing in the world.” I clear my throat. “They don’t seem to mind that I’mhere.”

“Of course not,” he assuresme.

When Libby comes back, I sit down on the couch with her on the floor in front of me. Rufus comes bounding over, his leash in his mouth. “Do you need me to take him out?” I ask Matt, who’s whisking waffle mix. There is nothing sexier than a shirtless man cooking. Yowza.

“I owe him a walk,” he says. “But it will wait until after breakfast.”

It takes me two tries to braid Libby’s hair because she can’t hold still. But I manage a decent braid in her silky hair. Then June asks, so I do hers, too. Then everyone eats waffles and sausage at Matt’s table.

The waffles are…awful. When I give up on mine, I glance at Matt to see that he’s abandoned his, too. “Gluten free,” he mouths at me over his coffee cup, then scowls.

His daughters don’t seem to mind, though. They scarf theirs down. When they’re done, Matt’s ready with a wet washcloth to get the syrup off their sticky fingers. Then they beg him to read him a chapter of Ramona the Brave. “Before Mommy comes to get us,” June adds, lookingsad.

He checks his watch. “After I finish my coffee,” he promises, parking his feet under the table besidemine.

Surreptitiously, I offer a bite of waffle to Rufus.

After a single sniff, he turns his nose away. But then, since he has my attention, he picks up his leash again and eyes me pityingly. “Can’t you see me?” his eyes say. “I’m righthere!”

“I’m going to take Rufus out for a little walk,” I announce.

“You don’t haveto…”

“I know!” I say, snapping the leash onto his collar. “Read to your girls.”

“Thank you, honey,” he says, his gray gaze warmingme.

“You’re welcome. Go.”

I put on my jacket and take out the dog. When we pass the coffee shop, I have an idea. A barista I know is behind the counter, and I wave frantically until he spots me. “Can I get two chocolate croissants to go? Sorry for making you come overhere.”

“No prob, Hailey. One sec.” He takes my money and brings back my pastries in a bag, and change. “That your dog? He’scute.”

“He’s a friend’s,” I say. “See you tomorrow.”

We’re not gone for very long, because I plan to leave the croissant for Matt and get gone before his ex comes to fetch the girls at ten. I re-enter the lobby at 9:30 and scamper for the elevator doors, which are closing.

“Thanks,” I gasp when a hand holds themopen.

But when I step inside the elevator, I realize my mistake. It’s Kara, Matt’s ex. And now she’s eyeing me as if I were the carrier of a nasty disease.

“Good morning,” I say, wishing I’d taken Rufus out for a very longwalk.

“Morning,” she says tightly.

Rufus tries to greet her, too, but she pushes his feet off her camel-colored coat. So I tug him back, clicking my tongue.

Neither one of us pleases her, apparently.

It’s the longest elevator ride ever. I try to think of something nice to say, but the doors part before I’ve worked out what that mightbe.

I let her get off first, and she walks ahead of me to Matt’s door with a posture so regal the queen could take lessons. When she knocks, he opens right away. “Hail— You’re early, Kara,” he says quickly. Then his eyes lift to find me bringing up therear.

I make an apologetic face, but his only looks amused.

“Are those waffles?” she asks by way of a greeting.

“Gluten free,” he assuresher.

She sniffs anyway. “Let’s go, girls.”

“We were going to read another chapter!” Libby whines.

“Go get your clothes on,” she barks. The girls are still in theirPJs.

“Isn’t my braid pretty?” Libby asks, twirling around in front of her mother. “Hailey didit.”

Kara’s lip curls, and I don’t really blame her. She doesn’t know me, and it looks as if I’ve tried to remake her daughters into my two little clones. “Please put on your clothes. Leave your PJ’s on the bed. They stay here. Matt,” she snaps. “Helpthem.”

He opens his mouth and then closes it again, trying to decide what to do. I lift my chin slightly. Go on. It’s okay. He trots off toward the girls’ room while I drop to a knee and unclip Rufus. Then I rub his belly. Last time Kara showed up, I ran away like a frightened bunny. I could do that now, but why? The damage is already done. And I’m not afraid of her anymore.

It is what itis.

Matt reappears, holding a little pink duffel bag. “All set,” he says, handing the bag to Kara. When I stand up, he steps closer and rubs myback.

Kara actually rolls her eyes. “We didn’t discuss the girls spending time with your hookups.”

Matt practically growls. “Hailey is not a hookup,” he spits. “We’re dating.”

“Uh-huh.” Her irritated gaze swivels to me. “It won’t last, you know. He’s never around. The women hurl themselves at him on theroad.”

“Which doesn’t matter,” he says through clenched teeth. “And neverdid.”

Whoa. Nothing like a little post-marital spat on Sunday morning.

Luckily, June and Libby have made it back into the room, calming everyone down. I drift out of sight, taking myself into Matt’s bathroom to wash my hands while he says goodbye to his children and sees his ex out thedoor.

A couple of minutes later I hear him enter the bedroom. “What’s in the bag?” heasks.

“Chocolate croissants,” I say, handing them over. “One for each ofus.”

“Fuck yeah.” He sets the bag on his dresser. “I’m topping up our coffees. Let’s eat ’em inbed.”

My first impulse is to worry about crumbs. Then I check myself. “Yeah, let’s.”

Matt

“You look hot in my shirt,” I tell Hailey. I’ve just fucked her in the middle of my bed. I’m naked and she’s wearing only the shirt.

“Mmh,” is all she can manage, since she’s still breathinghard.

We cuddle for a few lovely minutes. “Thanks for not freaking out when my ex-wife was a bitch.”

She chuckles. “I get it. I reallydo.”

“I’m always the bad guy,” I tell her. Telling Hailey my troubles isn’t my MO, but sex has loosened my tongue. “She has a boyfriend. I’m sure he spends the night more often thannot.”

“The dentist, right?”

“Good memory. I didn’t say a word when he entered the picture. I thought—Kara is so fucking picky about every goddamn thing. But she knew him in high school, and if she’s brought him into my children’s lives, he must be a good guy. I gave her the benefit of the doubt. But I don’t ever get that with her. Everything I feed them is questioned. I don’t get a say on what school they go to next year, or where they should spend Christmas.”

“I’m sorry,” Hailey says, stroking my chest. “You’re such a good dad. They’re lucky to haveyou.”

“I do okay,” I mumble. I’ve whined enough already.

She raises herself on one elbow. “I’m not kidding. You’re the best kind of parent. You listen when they talk. You don’t correct every little thing that comes out of their mouths. You just appreciatethem.”

“That’s what anyone woulddo.”

“Nottrue.”

There’s something vehement in her tone that gives me pause. “Sorespot?”

She snorts. “Maybe. My mother spent every day of my childhood making sure I knew I’d already let her down. My dad left when I was five, and she told me it was my fault.”

I sit up fast. “What the fuck, Hailey? Who says that to a child?”

“I know.” Her smile is wan. “Maybe I don’t have the parenting bar set very high. But you’re good with them, Matt. Don’t ever let her convince you otherwise.”

Flopping back on the bed, I let out a grunt. “The co-parenting thing ishard.”

“I know,” she says quietly. “I can’t even imagine the stresses it adds. What did you say to your girls when you movedout?”

“Well…” I try not to think about that day if I can help it. “Kara sat ’em down and told them, ‘Our family will work better if Daddy lives somewhere else.’ And I just kinda sat there and nodded, like that made any sense at all. I think she got it out of a parenting book on divorce. The girls weren’t even three, though. And I already traveled so often that I’m not sure it sunk in for a while.”

That whole month is a blur to me now. But it still hurts, goddamn it. I never wanted to do that to my kids. And I was never given a choice.

“Do you miss Kara?” Hailey asks softly.

“Fuck no,” I say, and it’s the truth. “Things weren’t great between us. But I don’t give up like that. I made a vow, and I wasn’t going to let a shitty game schedule mess it up, you know? She hated the lifestyle. She said, ‘Being divorced won’t really be any different most of thetime.’”

Hailey makes a noise of distress. “That’scold.”

“And short-sighted,” I point out. “I’ll be retired before the girls need braces. We said forever at our wedding, but she can’t count.” I laugh, but it’s bitter.

She strokes my hip with soft fingers. “Sorry for your troubles.”

“Not having any troubles right now. Except for croissant crumbs in my bed.” Time to lighten up this conversation.

“That was your idea, bigguy.”

I roll over and kissher.