4. Ex-Husband?

4

EX-HUSBAND?

DARREN

S itting outside in my rental car, I stare into the window of the diner and watch her. Her blonde ponytail sways behind her as she passes by the window every few minutes. I’ve been out here for nearly a half hour like a coward, unable to move, but my anger takes over, and I finally shut off the car.

When I enter the diner, I have my pick of tables. Purposefully, I choose one in her section near the back and slide into the red leather booth, tossing my sunglasses on the table. From the outside, I was expecting retro décor, and I’m not disappointed as old black and white photos hang on the light green walls. I fold my hands on the table.

The air fills with the scent of cherry blossoms and I know she’s close. I tilt my head just enough to see her as she takes a step forward with a plate of grilled cheese that I didn’t order.

Shock is written all over her face. “Darren?”

I rest my arm casually over the bench seat and school my face because seeing her affects me more than I was prepared for.

“What are you doing here?”

“I could ask you the same thing. Shouldn’t you be relaxing on a beach somewhere instead of working in a shitty diner?” I challenge. “Since you have five million dollars and all.”

She’s scared.

She’s scared because she knows I’ll force her to admit what she doesn’t want me to know.

“Yeah, well some of us prefer to be humble,” she lies, and even though I’m angry and hurt I still want to kiss the truth out of her until there is nothing left to tell.

I sniff. “Humble, is that what you call it?”

“I like working.” She shifts on her feet. “Unlike some people.”

I look around the diner’s scuffed linoleum flooring, chipped laminate tables, and ripped vinyl seats. She doesn’t belong here.

She belongs with me. “Aren’t you tired of pretending?”

The bell above the door chimes as a few customers enter. A red-haired waitress grabs a couple menus and directs them to a table on the other side of the diner, but her eyes curiously watch us.

“What do you want from me?” she asks with a tired voice, and I can see it in her eyes too. Like the light is starting to dim and this fucking place is what’s extinguishing it.

“I want you to tell me the truth, for once,” I grit out.

“Darren, I have to work.” She walks away and I scramble out of the booth to follow her.

“You don’t get to walk away from me—again,” I scold, and my gruff voice gets the full attention of the diner.

Evangeline clenches her fists as she stands with her back to me.

“This your ex-husband?” the red-haired waitress asks.

“Ex-husband?” I bark out a laugh. “No, we’re still married. I have no intention of signing those papers.”

And that’s when Evangeline turns around to face me, a pleading look in her eyes.

“I might look sweet, but I got mace in my apron, and I know how to use it,” the waitress says, and I’m glad there’s at least one person here who cares about her even a fraction as much as I do.

“It’s fine, Belinda.” Evangeline holds up her hand to warn her off.

Belinda hesitates, narrowing her eyes at me before she goes back to her table.

“Do they know you’re a millionaire?”

“I’m taking a break,” Evangeline says.

“You just had one,” the cook says, poking his head out from the pick-up window.

“I’m taking another one,” Evangeline calls back to him.

As we exit into the alley, she whirls around, the fiery look back in her eyes. “What do you want, Darren?”

“I want to know why you’re working as a waitress when you have five million dollars.”

She narrows her eyes at me. “Oh, stop it, Darren. You know I don’t have the money, that’s why you’re here.” She throws her hand up at me.

“I want to know why.”

She stays silent, her lips pressed into a thin line. I have no intention of making things easy on her. Not after how she left.

“Do you know what it was like to get out of the exam and find you gone?”

There’s remorse in her eyes. “Stop it.”

“That was a huge day for me,” I say. “You know what taking the exam meant to me.”

Frustrated, I clamp the back of my neck and stare at the concrete before I finally look at her again. “If I’m being honest, because let’s face it, one of us has to be, I hated you for like a second.”

A shadow passes over her eyes. “You should hate me,” she admits.

“Fuck, Evan. I told you I loved you.”

“Darren,” she says my name and I feel it right down to my core.

“I meant it. Every single word and you fucking left.”

She turns away, wrapping her arms around her body, as if she can’t bear to look at me.

“Stop running away.” I take a few steps forward, but I don’t touch her, not yet.

“I just saved us a goodbye that was inevitable.”

“Bullshit! You ran away like a coward,” I argue.

She throws her arms in the air. “This was never going to work!”

“You didn’t even give us a chance.”

“Because I know how it ends and it’s not good for either of us,” she says.

“I know how this ends, Evan. I’ve seen it. It’s you and me, fucking old, surrounded by our grandchildren. That’s how this ends,” I demand, “Not here in a fucking alley behind a shitty diner.” I can see the tears swimming in her blue eyes like the churning ocean.

She tries to move away but I back her against the building. “Admit that you love me, Evan,” I demand.

She shakes her head, her blonde ponytail swaying.

“If you didn’t, you wouldn’t have donated the money.”

My eyes drop to her lips.

Lips I’ve kissed countless times.

Lips that have soothed and scolded and scorched me.

Each breath is done with effort, her chest rising and falling. She looks as though she might either kiss me or knee me in the balls. I’ll take whichever she’s willing to give right now.

“I only wanted it to take care of my grandmother, and she’s gone,” she says, her voice quiet and reserved. “It doesn’t mean I love you.”

I lean in, my lips so close to hers that I can feel her breath against mine. I can almost feel her heart thumping. I reach into her apron, pulling out the book. Her eyes widen and she tries to take it from me, but I pull it out of her grasp.

“You’re a very bad liar, Queenie.” I take a step back and hold the book before her, A Moveable Feast . The spine is cracked, the pages pulling away and the corners tell of once being dog-eared. Well-read and well-loved, the way a book should be.

I let her snatch the book from me and she tucks it back in her apron for safe keeping.

“It doesn’t matter.”

“It matters to me!” I raise my voice in frustration. Jesus she’s stubborn.

“I don’t belong there. Don’t you see that?”

“I don’t.”

“Then you have blinders. You want to run for office, and I will kill that dream for you.” She touches her chest.

“I only had that dream because of you. Do you think any of it matters when you’re not there with me?” I demand. “I don’t need saving , Evan.” I take a step towards her again. “Not anymore.” I brush my palm against her cheek.

She angles her head to lean against my palm as her eyes flutter.

“I want you.” I run my thumb over her bottom lip as she parts them. I want nothing more than to push her over the edge until she gives in. “Why do you have to be so stubborn?” I argue, removing my hand.

“Because you and I were a bad idea from the start. I have a past that you cannot recover from.”

“It’s the fifth congressional district of Virginia, not President of the goddamn United States!” I raise my voice again.

“This is just the tip of the iceberg. I won’t be the reason you don’t become what you were always meant to be.”

“I would have been content to squander my potential for the rest of my life,” I say. “Until you. Because of you, I want it all. I want what could be. And whether I get elected or not is irrelevant. You said not trying is the real crime. Well, I’m trying. Is that not good enough?” I protest. “Am I. Not. Good. Enough?” I enunciate every word.

She hugs herself as if to keep vital organs from spilling out all over the hot pavement.

“Just sign the papers,” she says. “Sign them and let me go.”

“You don’t want to admit that you love me, Evan, fine, but explain this to me,” I insist. “Why the fuck would you go back to living in that house?”

“I didn’t have a choice!” she yells.

“Well, now you do.” I give her a cunning smile.