17 Kikila

"Don't do this, Kikila!" Draeke calls desperately from his cell as he pounds weakly on the glass. He's merely charred thanks to his advanced suit, with the ghostcloak tech he stole from our experimental program. Technically, I did the same, but it was for testing purposes. I would never test on anyone but myself. Draeke is not so honorable.

"You've fucking ruined yet another part of my life," I shout at Draeke. "All I wanted was one chance to be my own person, to be free of you."

"Don't say that. You liked the attention," he snickers.

"I don't enjoy being suffocated every time you force yourself on me."

Rowkin glances at me. "I thought you weren't mated."

"I'm not. But he tried many times."

This makes Rowkin angry.

"I just wanted to be a woman with a man on a planet, without drowning in so much technology and watching eyes that I couldn't get off without someone knowing about it. But you— you had to take everything from me. And now I have to clean up yet another one of your fuck-ups!"

The battle approaches on the horizon, a growing cluster of ships and explosions, light and smoke, a swarm of desperation and death.

I am not a soldier. I have never been to war. But I feel the need to be here because I can be, and I know we can help.

I am still scared shitless.

Zoshun calls up that the engine is back online.

I tap the final two to life and feel my body press back into my seat.

Rowkin's rumble shifts into one of hunger, and I think he loves battle just as much as he loves burying his face between my thighs.

"Sorry," I say to him. "I didn't want you to hear all that. But it's true. For years, I've been fixing the weaknesses in his systems and picking up the pieces after he breaks shit."

He assesses our munitions.

"You defend yourself. There's nothing wrong with doing that. In fact, I quite like that about you." He smiles as he selects the shield cannon. "Shield up Novarks, then break some Nebs?"

I guide us toward the array of ships under attack. "Think you can be that accurate?"

Rowkin adjusts a few settings then readies his hand on the trigger with a grin. "You keep us alive. I'll hit my mark."

"She was promised to me," Draeke sneers as I guide us quickly through the tangle of warring ships. Rockets blaze through the sky. I jerk us away in the direction the screens alert me to.

Rowkin fires at the Novark vessels. The rockets that slam into them coat them in blue light that crawls around each ship until it is a solid blanket, then slowly plumps into a bubble of protection.

Rowkin picks up a loose can rolling around on the floor and throws it at Draeke's cell. "Shut up, you spoiled brat. You don't deserve her."

He launches repeated shots, hitting every target just like he said, muttering to himself like the heat of battle doesn't have his adrenaline pumping or his hands trembling. "You scarless elitists never understand or respect life because you have never had to lose anything you loved."

I'm surprised by Rowkin's impression of him.

"Well, you are going to lose everything tonight," Rowkin adds. "Your mate, your ship, your reputation, and quite possibly your life if you don't cork it."

A light laugh escapes me.

Rowkin blushes.

"And you know what it's like to lose, you pink freak?" Draeke challenges.

Rowkin draws in a breath and sets his narrowing eyes on the stars. "You have no idea, you selfish fuck."

I can't stand the idea of him being uncomfortable in his own skin, so I grab him by the collar of his jacket, draw him to me, and kiss him hard.

Rowkin's eyes close and his brows pinch together.

"Guys?" Draeke whines. "Watch the sky?"

I break the kiss, because for once, Draeke is right. I should be watching where we're going. But in a brief moment, I'm okay with letting the universe decide my fate if only to die knowing I have found the one I want forever, that he's my choice, and he respects me as much as he wants me.

Rowkin nuzzles my cheek. The way his breath heats and he nips at my bottom lip, I know he's going to be okay.

"There's more where that came from," I whisper with a wink.

His body heats enough that I can feel it even from my seat.

"Oh, fuck this. We are getting back in time for that bonding ceremony." Rowkin takes the controls, calls back for Zoshun to secure himself, and then tells me to tighten my harness. "You wanted to know what all I can do. I suggest you hang on."

Rowkin darts us through the battlefield of space between blazing rockets that fill the cabin with flashes of colors. He launches the shields with accuracy, slings rockets at the Nebs while dodging their attacks like he's done it hundreds of times.

I clutch my harness as the ship rocks and dives and banks and climbs. It's a jarring ride, but one that has me more excited than I ever have been. I have not witnessed the limits of a Terran Phoenix. And I'm impressed with Rowkin's capabilities as a pilot.

Draeke groans behind us, and I realize he probably has never been in a real battle before. Neither have I, but I'm definitely having more fun than he is.

Rowkin's eyes move quickly, his fingers faster, and I'm in awe of his focus out here in this chaos. If I was here alone, I would be terrified. But with him, I feel as safe as a person can flying through crossfire.

Nebs fire missiles that streak beams of white light that trail smoke. Novark's light up shadow shields with gold rockets that spiral out in fractal patterns when they hit. The stars are alive with the rage of munitions. Adrenaline races through me and my heart slams against my ribs as the shots graze our hull.

Rowkin finally gets in the position to drop the light weapons out the back. "I have to keep my eyes on the scanners this time. Can you drop them?"

I steady my shaking fingers over the controls.

"Mark," he says.

I tap the first.

He continues, and we launch a line of light bombs that obliterate Neb shields and eat into their ship.

Warning lights flash in red all over the cabin.

"Enemy locked on."

"Rowkin?" I ask.

He silences the alarm, though the lights continue to flash. "Hang on."

He slams us into a nose dive but doesn't pull up. We do a full 180. The shoulder straps of my harness catch my body. My hair swings up over my head. A shriek leaves me but turns into laughter when the warning lights shut off.

Rowkin chuckles beside me as we launch across the belly of the neb's ship. "Again?"

"Yes!"

"Mark."

As our heading smoothes out and glides along the underside of the ship, I drop bomb after bomb with steadier hands.

With the empire's berserker vulnerable, the Novark vessels shielded, the battle is far fairer. The Nebulous Empire's massive ship takes rapid fire.

Soon, the enemy turns away and battle wanes until the Nebs ultimately launch for the outer rim.

Shofpa appears onscreen with Gorsh beside him as the battle cools. "We are in your debt."

"Maybe we can work something out." Rowkin remarks. "You fight well. My planet understands the frustration of not having the shield technology. Klaphos are the same. Perhaps we could negotiate with the Federation for a temporary alliance in our sector of the galaxy as a trial run. Terrans and Nytheralians have tech we can use. We have battle capabilities beyond theirs."

I'm surprised by Rowkin's insistence.

"Shofpa speaks with someone behind him. "We are open to a negotiation if your people are."

"I will speak with them." Rowkin hesitates. "On one condition."

"What's that?"

"That you do not touch our females ever again."

Gorsh shifts like he's uncomfortable. His face is still bruised.

"It is not easy to control blackout rage."

"Try," Rowkin ends the call and sets us on a course for Terran space.

He doesn't wait long to engage the loradrive. "I still don't trust them. But I think they're starting to see what joining the federation could do for them."

I wrap my hand over his. "Thank you."

"For what?"

"Giving an enemy of an enemy a chance."

"Sometimes the best way forward is to pick up the pieces we once left behind." Rowkin guides the ship into the blue blaze of hyper phase and watches the screen. "But I do not intend to make a habit of dwelling on the past. I want to make a new future, a better, safer one."

I glance at where Draeke's slumped on the floor of his cell. "Hey, dingle berry, you still alive back there?"

Draeke moans.

"Cool." I nod to myself. "You're still a piece of shit. You know that right?"

Draeke rolls onto a side and grunts a yes. He lifts a hand and gives me a thumbs up.

Minutes later, Rowkin takes us out of loradrive and guides us into Lunar orbit again. "I can't believe you came for me."

"I've done it once before," I simper, tapping a finger over my lips.

Rowkin swallows and hums a grunt. He lands us in the hangar and unlocks the ramp. He's unbuckled and up before the ramp hits the ground. Rowkin unlocks the cell, drags Draeke out by a boot and deposits him in front of security. "Tried to abduct me. He's taken Kikila's technology and illegally tracked her for years with this." He hands over my mother's necklace. Then he turns back for me, picks me up, slings me over his shoulder and runs down the ramp.

"Rowkin?" I'm saddened to see my mother's necklace walking off in the hand of a security officer. But I'm glad to know how Draeke's figured out where I am and that he won't be able to anymore.

I can feel Rowkin's two heart beats through my belly, or maybe it's mine racing, I can't say for sure.

He slaps a hand over my ass and squeezes it. "We have business to attend to."