Chapter 14

Dinner was over.

Ezekiel vanished.

Matthew showed us the door.

I rode back with Ordell, my back pressed to his chest, the gentle rock of the horse beneath me and the heavy weight of guilt pressing down on me.

Turned out Ezekiel never planned to kill Laroux, only maim him to exact a blood debt. My leaping into the fray had broken his hold on the bat creatures, sending them into a frenzy, and Laroux had paid the price.

We didn’t speak on the way back. Not one word, and that was fine by me. I’d done and said enough for one day.

Back at the mansion, Ordell helped me off the horse. His hands continued to rest on the dip above my waist even with my boots firmly on the ground, and I forced myself to look at his face, fully expecting to see disapproval, but there was nothing but compassion in his ocean blues.

“You could have died,” he said softly.

“Instead, she got someone else killed,” Hemlock said tightly. “Well fucking done.”

There it was, the judgment I deserved. The berating I was owed, and heck if I wasn’t grateful for it.

I stepped out of Ordell’s grip to look at them both. “I fucked up. I’m sorry.”

Hemlock closed his eyes briefly, exhaling as if to let it go.

“Nothing with Ezekiel can be taken at face value,” Ordell said. “You can’t make assumptions. Your assumptions can get someone killed.”

I swallowed against the tightness in my throat. “I realize that now.” But it was too late for Laroux. Three deaths on my watch. I was failing. Hard.

“Here.” Hemlock held out my sword to me. “You dropped this.”

I’d walked out of the castle without it. What the fuck was wrong with me? I didn’t drop the ball like this, not ever.

I took it from him with a muttered thanks.

“Get some rest,” Ordell said. “This is only the beginning. If you’re serious about moving into the castle, then we’re with you. But you need to heed our counsel. You may have watcher journals, but we have hunter accounts, and hunters know how to assess a predator.”

“I can’t lose another innocent. I’ll do whatever it takes.”

“He saved you earlier,” Hemlock said. “Those things could have done some serious damage to you before he wrested control of them again. He could have let you get hurt, but he’s claimed you as property.”

“I’m no one’s property.”

“No. Of course not,” Ordell said. “But we can use it to our advantage. He’s intrigued by you, and while his attention is on you, it won’t be on his next murder spree.” Ordell’s brows came down in thought. “Maybe we can do this. Hold his attention long enough for?—”

“It’s late,” Hemlock cut him off. “We can talk tomorrow, after you’ve been into town and bought a dress for the Exciatio. His favorite color is?—”

“Red?” I canted my head. “It has to be red, right?”

“No,” Ordell said. “Blue. His favorite color is blue.”

“How do you know that?”

“Hunter archives,” Hemlock said dryly.

Wow, they really did keep good notes.

“Get some rest,” Ordell said. “You’re going to need your wits about you. We all are.”

Sleep didn’t come easilythat night, and dawn came too quickly, leaving me irritable and tired. The night before replayed in my mind—all the things I could have done instead of the thing I did do. That man was dead because of me, and my failure ate at me.

Haiden was a welcome sight in the kitchen, and the aroma of freshly brewed coffee went a little way to helping me find my happy place.

“How did you sleep?” he asked, his back to me.

“Terribly.”

“I heard what happened last night.”

“Good, because I don’t think I have the will to recount it.” I parked my ass and dropped my head into my hands, elbows on the table. “I messed up so bad. Completely misread the situation.”

“It’s what he wanted,” Haiden said. “No doubt he knew what you’d think and anticipated how you’d react. You’re ordained. Conditioned to save innocent lives. There was no way he couldn’t have known that.”

I lifted my head as he set a generous mug of coffee in front of me. “What are you saying?”

He looked me dead in the eyes. “I’m saying he wanted that man dead, and he wanted you to be the cause. Guilt can be a crippling emotion. It can make you second-guess yourself, just like you’re doing right now, which in turn gives him the upper hand.”

Damn… “That makes sense.”

He patted my shoulder. “Drink your coffee. I’m making pancakes. Today is a new day.”

A new day, yes. That was the attitude to take. I sipped my coffee, mentally preparing for the day ahead. A trip into Old Town could be interesting despite the whole dress shopping aspect.

The door opened, and Merry slipped into the room. The last time I’d seen her, she’d been full of bubbly energy, but today it was as if she walked under a cloud. Her shoulders were rounded, her skin lackluster, and her movements sluggish. She mumbled a morning and took the seat opposite me, her eyes downcast.

Haiden put a pot of tea on the table for her. “Orina has to go into town today,” he said to her, his attention on me, questioning, almost prompting.

Ah, okay. “I need to buy a dress. I am not a dress person.” I sipped at my coffee. “No idea where to go.”

“Agatha’s Emporium,” Merry said. “She has the best designs.” She peeked up at me from beneath her bangs. “I…I could take you.”

This hesitant, soft-spoken woman was a far cry from the light-hearted one I’d met yesterday. But she was grieving her friends. She’d had to do so over and over. It was cruel and heartbreaking.

“I’d love for you to take me. I think Edwin’s coming too.”

“We should take Padma,” Merry said. “We can go to our favorite cake shop and…” She trailed off. “I’m sorry, we used to go there…before.” She sucked in a breath. “I can’t believe they’re gone.” Her eyes welled.

Haiden was on hand with a tissue, his expression sympathetic but in a weary way. But then, he’d watched her grieve too many times.

I fixed a smile on my face. “I’d like to go. See what they loved about the place.”

A little life bled into her eyes. “Would you like to try some elderflower tea?”

I fucking hated the stuff. “Sure.”

My mouthstill tasted like flowers by the time we left for the parade, a part of Old Town where all the shops were. I’d hoped to see Hemlock and Ordell before leaving, but they didn’t join us for breakfast. I’d catch them later.

Edwin drove us into town in the Order carriage—much smaller in comparison to the one belonging to the hunters but still large enough to fit six regular-sized people.

Padma sat opposite me, her gaze fixed on the view out of the window, which was the usual vista of fields and trees.

But the town was visible in the distance where the sky was darker and smog-clogged from the many coal fires. They’d been burning wood at the chapter house. Much cleaner.

“Do you know what kind of dress you want?” Merry asked.

“I don’t want any kind of dress, but I have to get one, so feel free to pick for me.”

Her eyes lit up.

“I think something to accentuate your waist and bosom. No bustle, though. Oh, and off the shoulder. You’ll be the belle of the ball.”

“She’s not going on a date,” Padma said tightly. “She’ll be surrounded by predators. The last thing she wants to do is stand out.”

Merry made an ‘o’ with her mouth. “Good point. Something sedate and…underwhelming, then?”

“I doubt he’ll let you get away with that,” Padma said. “Ezekiel likes to show off his things.”

“I’m not his thing.”

“You’re the first watcher he’s invited to go to the Exciatio as his companion.”

“I’m the first female watcher to be handed this role.”

“Are you sure it isn’t more than that?”

“Oh, I’m not arguing with you. I’m certain it’s exactly that. He snarled as much to his minions last night.”

Padma’s eyes narrowed. “What happened…exactly?”

So Ordell and Hemlock hadn’t told them. “Well, dinner came with entertainment…” I filled them in on the events of the previous evening.

Merry sat with her hand over her mouth, her eyes wide and unblinking, but Padma merely sneered. “That sick bastard. He’ll try to seduce you, just to prove he can.”

“Yeah, I figured. He has this eye thing that he does…” I shook my head. “I won’t let him get to me. I just need to find a way to use his fascination to my advantage. Keep him trained on me so he leaves the townsfolk alone.”

“You think you can do that?” Merry asked.

“I’m going to try my darndest, and part of that involves moving into the castle.” Merry gasped, but Padma didn’t look surprised. “Edwin told you.”

“Yeah. I think it’s smart.”

Well, I didn’t expect that. “You do?”

“Keep your enemies close and all that.” She cracked a small smile that I couldn’t help but match. “But you should know a little about the nobles before you walk into the Exciatio.”

“There wasn’t a whole lot in the journals. The three houses were mentioned, and there was a little about their abilities, but that’s all.”

“Merry is the expert on all things noble house related,” Padma said, looking over at her.

Merry sat up taller. “I do know quite a bit. I can tell you that House of Blessed is run by Zafrina Sangera. She’s old, almost as old as Tepes himself, or so the rumors go. She’s also gorgeous and graceful but…” Merry held up a finger in warning. “Do not let her beauty fool you. The woman is deadly as eff. Oh, they’re also rumored to do blood magic, but no one can confirm it.”

“Noted.”

“House of Shadows keeps themselves cloistered a lot. You don’t see them at many functions…but heck, they could be there and just hiding in the shadows for all we know. They’ve got the ability to control them, after all. Laudon Umbren is the head of that house. The Umbren family are money. They own the banks and several businesses in the territory.”

Okay… “Blessed is bloody and deadly, Shadows are sneaky…and spirit? I read they did charity work.”

She wrinkled her nose. “Not just that; they literally worship Ezekiel. I mean they have a church dedicated to him. The Church of Blood Saints. The charity is called Heartsblood. A little on the nose but whatever.”

“They worship Ezekiel?”

“Yep, for bringing them into being.”

“Huh? How so?”

Both Padma and Merry stared blankly at me for a moment, but it was Padma who spoke. “You do know who…what Ezekiel is, don’t you?”

“Yeah, one of the oldest vampires in existence.”

She exhaled softly. “Fuck, the Order really needs to get its shit together.”

“He’s not one of the oldest,” Merry said. “He is the oldest. Orina, Ezekiel Tepes is the first vampire. Ever.”