31. 31

31

Ember

T here was a certain kind of safety, a certain comfort, and peace, that came from being wrapped in the arms of the one person you could trust. The one who would never hurt you or try to break you. Ethan’s arms were that for me.

Ethan was my protector, and even though he’d fallen back into that role while trying to avoid being more to me, he had to be both. He had to be my protector and my lover. He had to be the man who owned me inside and out. It wasn’t just about not being able to trust anyone else to be with me like that, it was about knowing that it was only his touch I’d ever be able to tolerate.

Why couldn’t he see that? That it would be a good thing instead of bad? Why couldn’t he see that he had to be the one we overwrote their touch with?

“I won’t do that to you again,” Ethan whispered, pressing his lips against my temple. Do what? I had no idea what he was referring to, because I’d been lost in memories, and phantom touches, and horrors.

“What?”

“Whatever triggered you, whatever caused that fucking flashback. Was it me calling you by your name, or is it something else? Em, you need to tell me what to avoid, so I can keep you safe.”

Keep me safe. What about make me feel better?

“I don’t know. A lot’s happened in the last few days; it could be anything.”

He groaned, tightening his arms around me.

“It’s what I did to you, isn’t it? No wonder you’re having flashbacks, because yet another man forced himself on you. Took away your ability to refuse. I swear, trapping you here with me is going to do you more harm than good.”

I struggled out of his hold, which admittedly wasn’t difficult, because he didn’t fight me at all. He looked bemused when I fixed him with a fierce glare.

“Get over yourself, Ethan! Not everything is about you, and you’re no threat to me, or to my mental state. Jesus. I was fucked up before we met, and I’ll always be fucked up. Who knows if I’d have ever been normal anyway, I mean, you’ve met my family, right?”

He snorted, and instantly held up his hands, apologising for his reaction, like it was the wrong thing to do.

“You know what? That right then was the most honest you’ve been with me so far. You can’t keep holding back, and tempering what you say, so you don’t trigger me. I’m broken, but I’m not going to break further if you mess up. You’re the first person I’ve ever allowed to hold me like that. The first person I chose to do more with. You need to stop tiptoeing around me, like you think I’ll shatter, and start behaving like yourself. You were fixing me, Ethan. You. Not the teacher, not the strict rules and boundaries. You .”

Ethan sighed, reaching out to move my hair out of my eyes, and stopping just before he touched me.

“Jesus, I just can’t help myself. I feel like I keep taking liberties. You don’t really want me, Em, it’s just that I’m the first person outside your family that you’ve trusted. It doesn’t mean I’m the right guy, I mean, I’m not. I’m much older than you, and I’m… well, I’m a disgraced teacher, for fuck’s sake. I have nothing to offer you. I’m just, I think maybe you’re fixating on me, because I’m someone you’ve spent a lot of time with.”

Sanctimonious prick! I shoved him away and that wasn’t enough, so then I slapped his face, and when I lunged at him to do it again, he caught my arm, and held it in a tight grip, a scowl on his face.

“Remember how I said I’m losing my fucking mind? Don’t do this, Em. Don’t keep pushing me to anger, because I lose control. I never used to, but I’m a monster now, remember?”

I scoffed at him, tugging at his grip, but he didn’t release me.

“Please. My family are monsters. You? You’re just a man pretending that you don’t want what’s right in front of you. Like you said, you have nothing left to lose, Ethan. Why don’t you just fucking take what you want?”

His grip loosened and he got off the bed, heading for the door.

“This isn’t how it’s going down, Em. You’re not going to keep pushing me to lose it, just so you can use that to get what you want. I’ll get my fucking mind back somehow, and it won’t be through your manipulations.”

“Well, fuck you then. Give me my phone though, because I need to check in with my dads. I heard them earlier, so I know you were on the phone to them. They wanted an update, remember?”

He tossed it on the bed with me, and walked out, slamming the door.

My dad, Gray, was so ready for the call that he answered instantly, probably surprised it was another video call.

“There you are, sweetheart. Is he hurting you? Do you want me to burn him for you?” My god, how was it that his words made me cry? Call my dads what you want, but they care, and this is how they show it.

“Aw talk to me, baby girl. Do you want me to get rid of him, and bring you home?” I swallowed hard, glaring at the door Ethan had disappeared through.

“No. I want to break him first. He’s-”

Dad frowned, holding up a hand.

“Break him? Em, what are you talking about? If he’s hurting you, we’ll kill him, but you’re not making sense.”

“He keeps rejecting me, but I’m not taking no for a fucking answer.” Dad grinned suddenly.

“Ah… that sounds familiar, I’m sure that’s a family trait. Let’s see if I can offer any advice here.”

Ethan

ALCOHOL WASN'T THE ANSWER, and I was actually surprised there was any in this house, bearing in mind that they knew they were locking their alcoholic daughter in here. Great parenting, you pair of insane bastards.

It was only a half bottle of vodka, but as a service to my charge here, I should probably get rid of it, right?

I poured a tall glass, and hid the last bit in the cupboard just in case she came down, and found it. It was high enough that she wouldn’t accidentally see it. The perks of being about a foot or so taller than her, I guess.

I sat by the window, gazing out at the green fields beyond the property’s border. The garden was big, but inaccessible, what with me being locked in like a fucking prisoner. How the hell did those bastards manage to trap me in this nightmare? It’s not a nightmare because of who I’m trapped here with though.

It’s a nightmare because I want her so fucking much, and my ability to hold back from touching her is completely gone at this point. I left that room before I did more than just touch her hair. I wanted to lay her down and fuck her into the mattress.

By the time Ember emerged from her room, I was on the last few drops of the vodka from that now empty bottle, and feeling much more chilled out.

“Ethan?”

“You’re still naked? For fuck’s sake, Em!” She shrugged, walking to the kitchen, that bare ass of hers wiggling as she moved. She was doing this to torture me. She knew I’d fucking jump her, and she was pushing it.

“I’m hungry. Shall I prepare something for us?”

“You’re going to cook naked? Better not fry anything then. You’ll get fat splatting all over those pert tits of yours.” Ember turned on her heel, frowning at me from the kitchen counter.

“Wait a minute. Have you been drinking?” She stormed across the room to me, snatching my empty glass and sniffing it. She cast her eyes around the room, and went back to the kitchen, finding the empty bottle in the bin.

“Ethan, seriously?”

“Oops. Guess it’s all gone. Never mind. I’m the only one allowed to drink anyway, right?” I made my way to the kitchen, feeling a little lighter on my feet, but not unsteady. I mean, it was less than half a bottle, and I’m pretty good at holding my alcohol. Practice does that.

“I’ll cook.”

“Screw that. You’re a liability in the kitchen if you’ve been drinking. Wow, you’re not the responsible guy I thought you were.”

I crowded her against the counter, as she tried to grab something from an overhead cupboard.

“Ethan!”

I ran my hands from her shoulders to her wrists, noting a slight flinch as I touched her skin.

“So pretty. So naked and pretty. Are you my meal, Em? Do you want me to press those sweet little legs wide, and feast on your pussy? Is that why you’re flaunting your body at me? I could definitely eat, if that’s the case.” I pulled her back against me, letting her feel my cock, because if she wanted to tease me, two can play that fucking game.

“Stop it. You’re just being an asshole because you blame me for you being here. Tough shit. Grow up and deal with it.”

I grabbed her damp hair, and pulled her back with me, turning her and pushing her back against the counter, trapping her with my body.

“Grow up? Ironic, coming from the teenager in the fucking house. I’m an asshole, am I? Why, because I refuse to play your stupid little fucking games? Get upstairs, and get some fucking clothes on, Ember. That’s an order.”

The side of her mouth quirked up in a smirk, and she shook her head.

“Can’t.”

“Don’t fuck me about. Do it now.” I dragged her away from the counter and shoved her into the hallway. “Get fucking dressed.”

She giggled this time. “I can’t, Ethan. I don’t have any clothes.” What the fuck was her game this time? There were clothes all over this damn place.

I pushed past her to her room, and grabbed her bag from the floor. Empty. What the hell? Where had she hidden her fucking clothes? I figured there’d be sweatpants and t-shirts galore in the drawers, right? Nope. Gone.

Fucker. I ran to the room I’d chosen, and the same issue hit me. My clothes were gone too. And the generic shit the house appeared to have been supplied with. What the fuck had she done?

“DAMMIT Ember, where are the fucking clothes?”

She folded her arms, offering me a belligerent glare.

“You said you wouldn’t call me that again.”

“Well, that’s when I thought you’d try being more grown up. Where the fuck are the clothes?”

She shrugged. “They seem to have vanished. I don’t know. We’ll just have to manage naked.”

“Where’s my jumper I put on you?” She shrugged again, lifting her hands up like a magician.

“Wow, looks like it disappeared too.”

Fucking hell! I lifted my t-shirt off and tossed it at her, watching her catch it and stare at me, like she couldn’t understand why she had it.

“Put it on. Now . I’ve had enough of your fucking games.”