Chapter 12

CHAPTER 12

V odka made people do a lot of stupid things; dance topless on a bar, call their ex, post idiotic things on social media…kiss their best friend!

"Oh, crap on toast!"

Penny smacked her head on the table for the fifth time that morning. Every time she thought of last night, her face heated, along with other, more intimate body parts. What the heck had she done? How she wished she could blame it on the booze, but she only had one drink. True, she didn't drink very often, but even she wasn't that much of a lightweight. Everything would be much better if she were.

BJ might have started the kiss, but she'd jumped in with both feet. Come to think of it, she distinctly remembered copping a feel of her BFF's luscious backside and giving it a very appreciative squeeze.

"Stupid, stupid, stupid, Penny!" Each condemnation punctuated with a sharp smack. She'd give herself a migraine at this rate.

Good. Something else to focus on so she didn't have to think about how she KISSED HER BEST FRIEND!

Last night her brain had done a giant error 404: intelligence not found. She hoped BJ hadn't changed his mind about the donation after her pathetic jump-his-bones lip lock. But who could blame her? Bravo Jackson had kissed her. Her! Penelope Williams. Nerd extraordinaire. Dateless wonder till she was twenty-two. Member number one of the all-brains-no-boobs club.

He didn't seem to mind your lack of assets last night.

Point one for her brain. If she remembered correctly, BJ had been very enthusiastic in his journey toward her breasts. Good thing he hadn't gotten a good hold of them, or he would realize she'd been wearing a push-up bra since senior year. Not merely for vanity's sake. Stupid clothing companies didn't believe grown women could still sport an A cup. She'd had a heck of a time finding tops that didn't gape without some help from a little extra padding.

Worse than kissing BJ would have been him finding out she still essentially stuffed like a pre-pubescent middle schooler.

"I can't believe I kissed BJ." Her empty kitchen didn't reply. It also didn't answer the burning question that had been eating away at her ever since she ran out of Jacks like her butt was on fire…

Why the hell had BJ kissed her?

Had he wanted to shut her up? Make her feel better? Prove a point?

As high as her IQ was, she simply could not figure out the very odd and totally out of left field actions of her best friend.

Not so far out of left field.

Okay, if she was being totally honest with herself, she had noticed a…shift in their dynamic ever since this baby stuff came up. But that didn't mean BJ suddenly had the hots for her. Maybe he just wanted to make her feel like a desirable woman. Since she'd been blubbering about her ex. If that was the case, it had worked. Holy flipping cow, did it ever!

She pondered the motives of last night, going over every detail in her head. A sharp knock on the door shattered the morning silence of her apartment. Penny didn't have many friends. She couldn't remember the last time someone from her family visited her at her place, and she hadn't ordered anything lately. There could only be one person on the other side of the door.

"Penny? You awake?"

She smacked her head on the table one more time as the deep rumble of her best friend—and the man she'd most recently tongue-tangoed with—sounded through the thick wooden door.

"Coming," the word croaked out past dry lips. She cleared her throat and tried again. "I'm coming." There, that sounded better.

Calmer. Not like she was internally freaking out. She hoped.

"BJ," she said, pasting on a bright smile as she opened the front door. He stood there in dark, faded jeans that clung to his muscular thighs. A dark blue t-shirt with the Colorado state symbol on it made his impossible blue eyes stand out even more. His hair had been swept up in his standard manbun today. Tiny flyaway strands blew at his temples in the slight air-conditioned breeze of her complex's hallway, reminding her how soft they had been when she had her hands full of them last night. Dang it! Did he have to look so darn yummy? "Hey, what are you doing here?"

Please don't let him say he came here to talk about last night.

He lifted a hand to reveal a green canvas bag dangling on two fingers. "It's Sunday."

Right. On Sundays they went to the farmer's market together. How had she forgotten?

Because she kissed the heck out of him yesterday and had very naughty dreams about him all night long!

Dammit.

"Oh, of course. Let me grab my stuff."

Normally she'd invite him in, but everything still felt too weird. In under a minute, she'd grabbed her purse and empty bags, hustling out the door. "Ready."

Kismet's Farmer's Market was held every Sunday from May until the first weekend of October. Since it was nearing the end of September, they only had two weekends left. The weather was holding up pretty well for Colorado in the fall. Winter coats were still packed away, but the early mornings could hold a slight chill. Penny always left the house with a light jacket.

She and BJ left her apartment, walking along the streets until they hit Goldmine. The farmer's market was at the end of the street. The town blocked off traffic to the last three blocks until the market closed at two. Normally, the excursion would be a pleasant one, where they talked and joked about her frustrating clients or his zany siblings, but today they walked in uncomfortable silence.

Two blocks away from the market, she couldn't take it anymore. Worry and guilt churned in her gut. Stopping in her tracks, she blurted out, "I'm sorry!"

BJ paused, turning to face her. One brow rose. "Sorry? For what?"

She tapped her fingers on her leg, a nervous habit she executed whenever she felt overwhelmed.

"For kissing you last night."

The corner of his mouth kicked up. "I think I'm the one who needs to apologize. If memory serves, I was the one who kissed you."

And why was that again? Her scaredy cat nerves refused to go away and let her ask. She decided to be cool instead. Brush it off as a silly mishap. Like those women in that TV show her sister liked to watch.

"Yeah, but I kissed you back and I might have gotten a bit carried away. It's been a while for me…um, I…" Oh shoot, this was embarrassing. "I'm sorry if I got carried away with it, and, um, yeah. It was just a weird, stupid thing…right?"

Nice going, Penny. Real smooth.

"I think we both got a little carried away," BJ said, stepping closer. She had to tilt her head up since the man towered over her a good six inches. "And it wasn't weird or stupid."

She swallowed the enormous sized ball of nerves currently lodged in the middle of her throat. "It wasn't?"

He shook his head, pale eyes gazing intently into her own as he reached out a hand to cup her cheek. Slight tremors racked her body as heat shot from the point he touched straight down to all her good parts.

"No. Actually, I think it was pretty hot."

"It was?"

"Damn near blew my head off."

Does. Not. Compute.

She'd ask for clarification, but all the breath had left her. It took all her brainpower to continue walking on her own two feet once BJ dropped his hand and turned to head toward the market. She wanted to ask—more than she wanted a waterproof laptop—but her brain could not wrap itself around the implication that BJ had not only started the kiss but enjoyed it too.

Friends did not kiss each other, and if they did, they certainly didn't enjoy kissing each other.

Unless they're naked friends.

True, but she and BJ were not naked friends.

Not yet.

Ugh! Her brain really needed to get a new topic to obsess over.

"You need a ride to the rehearsal Friday?"

She glanced up. BJ was inspecting Zak Crane's tomato crop. When had they made it to the market? She'd been so occupied with her inner turmoil she hadn't even noticed the noise of the crowd, the smell of the fresh produce, the sounds of music coming from the small band performing at the end of the street.

"Um, no thanks. I can get there myself."

He shrugged, motioning for Zak to give him a bag full of round, red heirlooms. She busied herself with her own vegetable selection. She may not cook, but keeping her fridge stocked with fresh veggies and ranch made her feel better about all the takeout and frozen dinners she ate.

It still shocked the heck out of her that Cassie had asked her to be a bridesmaid in her wedding to Del. She liked the woman, had known her for years, but they weren't best buddies or anything. Penny didn't have many female friends.

You don't have any female friends.

Ugh, her brain was being such a bitch today. Fine, her one and only real friend was the man standing next to her. The man she asked for his sperm so she could have a baby. The man she kissed last night who'd apparently enjoyed it as much as she had.

Oh boy, she needed a drink. Since it was ten-thirty on a Sunday morning, and she was at a farmer's market, her choices were limited to lemonade or wheat grass shots.

She picked the lemonade. Dipping raw vegetables in creamy ranch dressing to stay healthy-ish was one thing. Drinking churned up weeds you mowed over in the summer was taking things too far for Penny.

They walked around the rest of the market. Thankfully, BJ didn't bring up the kiss again. Keeping the conversation on the new restaurant and his brother's upcoming nuptials. Penny pushed last night to the back of her mind and tried to enjoy the pleasant morning. Most of Kismet came to the market. Plenty of people stopped them to say hi, including Apple and Olive. The former giving Penny a knowing look, raising a brow in BJ's direction and shaking her head in disgust. She wondered what the old woman would do if she knew Penny and BJ had locked lips last night.

Probably say ‘I told you so' because she's a mean old wench who always likes to be right.

Once they finished their shopping, BJ walked her back to their apartment. Things were finally feeling normal again. Penny chalked last night up to some weird combination of neither of them getting enough lately and the strange situation they currently found themselves in with the baby stuff. Who wouldn't get a little mixed up with all that going on? Everything was fine. She didn't have any sexual feelings for her best friend, and he certainly didn't have any for her.

At her front door, she rummaged around in her purse for her keys, fumbling with the dang thing. She could never find anything in it. Why couldn't women just carry wallets like men? Oh right, because fashion designers refused to put actual pockets in any women's clothing. Her jeans could barely hold her cell phone, let alone wallet, keys, emergency tampon, and whatever else she needed. But men's pants could hold a cavern of treasures. Once, BJ pulled a screwdriver out of his pocket. A screwdriver!

It wasn't fair.

Her hold on her purse slipped and the stupid thing would have gone crashing to the floor, but BJ's quick reflexes saved the day. His hands snaked out and caught it, reaching into the dark hole and coming out with her keys.

"How the heck can you do that, but it takes me at least ten minutes to find them every time?"

He grinned. "Gotta be smarter than the purse, Williams."

"I'm smarter than a lot of things, Jackson. Including you."

He chuckled as she unlocked her door and headed inside. BJ followed, placing the extra bag he'd carried for her on her kitchen table. She placed her own bag down, setting her purse along with them.

"Del wants to give the restaurant website a final look over before we launch it."

"Okay. I'll head over Wednesday afternoon before his shift and show him."

"Cool."

"Cool."

Now things were weird. The busy commotion of the market was gone. Here, it was just her and BJ. The sudden silence was deafening. All the awkwardness of this morning came rushing back. Did he want to stay and hang out? Normally they would, but today things felt weird. Everything had been fine when they were at the farmers' market, surrounded by people, but now…

"I, um, have some work to do…" Yup, she was taking the coward's way out and she didn't care.

BJ stared down at her. For the first time ever, she couldn't decipher the expression in his eyes. Did he want to talk more? She didn't think she could handle any talking about last night. Not here. In her apartment. Where they were alone, and her stupid hormones might hijack her brain again.

"I'll see you later?"

Oh thank goodness. He wasn't going to press anything.

"Yeah, later."

It was good that he was leaving. She wanted that. Right? Right. She certainly didn't want him to stay around so she could throw herself at him again.

"Bye, Penny."

He cupped her cheek, leaning in to kiss her on the forehead as he always did, but this time he didn't tilt her head down. He tilted it up. His face came closer until all she could see were his eyes. Burning with heat and desire. His head tilted, warm breath drifting across her lips, smelling of freshly squeezed lemons from the sips of her drink he'd pilfered earlier. Her eyes closed of their own volition and then…oh and then!

Full, firm lips pressed against hers in a chaste, but hot as all get out kiss. He lingered longer than a friend kiss warranted. She commended herself for not throwing caution to the wind, gripping his head in her hands, and devouring the sexy man right then and there.

What felt like a lifetime most likely lasted only a few seconds. Her eyes were still closed as the sound of her front door opening and closing reached her ears. When she opened them, she was alone, but the scent of him still lingered. Woodsy, sharp, and all man. Her lips were weighted, heavy from his kiss and burning with the desire for more.

"Bye, BJ," she spoke to the empty air and to her confused brain, because she knew no matter what he made her feel, she'd never be able to keep a man like BJ. He was her friend and that's all they could ever be.

No matter how much she secretly wished otherwise.