Chapter 21

It had been two weeks since I'd told Serenity we needed to stop what we'd been doing. In the time since, we hadn't seen each other once. We had needed to talk every so often. That couldn't be helped, considering the tight timeline we were on for the wedding, but at least we weren't in each other's faces all the damn time.

To her credit, she hadn't missed a beat on the business side of things. Mom's wedding planning was still in full swing and it was starting to look like we might actually just manage to pull it off despite the very short notice we'd had.

On the personal side of things, things hadn't been going as smoothly. At least, not for Serenity. The day after our big blowout, articles had come out with her vehemently denying that she and Ethan were back together.

The press had been on her like white on rice, following her every move and camping out in front of her work and home all day, every day. Ethan had received a renewed dose of interest himself, with photographs of his daily comings and goings also suddenly dominating the tabloids again.

I didn't care about him in all of this, though. As far as I was concerned, he didn't deserve the second chance she might or might not be giving him, but I respected Serenity. If she wanted to try one last time to make their marriage work, then that was their business.

Regardless of what I thought about trying to make it work with someone like that.

As I sat in my car, I drew in a deep breath and tried to swallow the bitterness rising from deep within as I thought about it all. I had no idea why she was giving him a second chance. In fact, after all the statements she put out, I wasn't even sure if she really was giving him another chance, but I did know that he'd left her place looking pretty smug that night, which had to mean something.

At this point, I didn't know what to think about any of it, so I decided to put it behind me. Whatever drama they had going on, it was theirs. I didn't want anything to do with it.

Nodding to myself, I got out of my car and put on my sunglasses. No doubt the fact that I was here at Serenity's venue today was going to cause a stir in the gossip pages, but I'd avoided it for as long as I'd been able to.

She and I had a meeting today and there had been no getting out of it. So here I was, half a month later, scowling at the press from behind dark glasses as I made my way to the doors. God, if she doesn't get a handle on this soon, she's going to start losing business.

The errant thought flew through my head before I could stop it, and while I hated myself for caring about her well-being, I did. She shouldn't have started something with me knowing that there might still be something there with her ex, sure, but ultimately, she'd had every right to try and move on.

It didn't work out for us, but maybe being with me had answered some questions for her about whether she still wanted Ethan in her life. At the very least, I supposed that meant I had helped her in some way and I couldn't be pissed at her about that.

What I knew about marriage was negligible, other than what I'd seen modeled by my parents, but I did know that times got tough sometimes. I also knew that when they did, couples either worked though their issues or not.

If that was where Serenity was at, then I couldn't hold it against her. I didn't have to like that I'd been used as cannon fodder, though, which was also why I wasn't planning on being particularly friendly with her today.

We weren't friends. That much, I was sure of. So once the front desk person waved me through, I knocked on her door and didn't smile when she called for me to come in. From this point forward, she was just another coworker.

A temporary one, at that, and I intended to treat her exactly like I did everyone else.

She was on the phone when I strode into her office, but she motioned for me to have a seat and gave me a polite, tight smile as I sat down. Those big blue eyes met mine as I waited for her to wrap up the call, and I saw the storm of emotion behind them.

"Alright, Francis," she said a few seconds later. "Thanks for all this. I'm sitting down with the client now and I'll get back to you in a couple hours."

With that, she ended the call and turned to me. Looking as beautiful as ever in a powder blue dress and her blonde hair swept up into a high ponytail, she smiled and my heart constricted, but then I reminded myself that she was taken and I blew right past the feelings.

"You wanted to finalize the drinks," I said curtly, not indulging in any niceties. "Mom and Richard are intent on the reception being a party, but they're not teenagers and it's not a frat house, so it'll be an open bar serving only the best."

She blinked at me. "Yes. Okay. I've got that written down as well, but your mom mentioned they might want a feature drink specifically for the wedding. That phone call I was just on was with a woman who provides specialty bartenders. We can bring them in as mixologists for?—"

"Again, it's not a frat house," I said firmly. "We don't need mixologists. If she wants a feature drink, let's arrange that and leave the bare-butt bartenders for bachelorette parties of women half her age."

Serenity's eyebrows arched. "You do know there are specialty bartenders that keep their clothes on, right? They're not all the bare-butt type."

"Of course, but I'm telling you that we want this to be a classy event. As long as you can work with that as the main parameter, we should be okay."

She opened her mouth again, and somehow, I knew she wanted to talk about more than the wedding. Something had changed about the way she looked at me, and I shut it down fast. "Let's just finalize the drinks. Mom loves champagne. Have your in-house bar staff send over all the feature drinks they can provide made with that as a base and we'll take it from there."

She blew out a frustrated breath. "Are we really back to square one? Why can't we just talk about what happened, Dash? You saw the statements I put out, right? You know I'm not back together with him, so why are you acting this way?"

I didn't understand why she cared so damn much. "Why are you pushing to talk about it when there's nothing to talk about?"

I saw her chest rise and fall on a deep breath before she fixed me with a look that was half challenge, half disappointment. "I saw the pictures of you with those other women. I know about your past and what was written about you being a playboy before."

I shrugged, arching an eyebrow at her. "So what? Those pictures were nothing, and what they wrote was bullshit."

"Exactly," she said emphatically. "I believe you, so why can't you believe me?"

Practically feeling the exasperation vibrating off her, I stared into those eyes and wondered if I could believe her. Realistically, I could probably have talked things through with her. I could've asked what he'd been doing at her place that night if it hadn't been for a reconciliation and I could've asked where they'd gone together so late, but I didn't want to fall back into anything with her.

Not while her husband was still on the scene and there was a chance they were trying to fix their marriage. It was a marriage, for God's sake. Not a damn fling. A marriage. I wasn't the type of guy who fucked with those kinds of vows, so I decided to push her away instead.

Even if I didn't believe what I was about to say, I didn't like the way she made me feel. I didn't want to lose someone I loved the way my mother had lost my father and I definitely didn't want to risk falling head over heels for someone who was already taken.

"Do you have a reality show coming up or something? Is that why you're trying to stay relevant? Is it for exposure, or do you just really enjoy the spotlight that much?"

She did a slow double-take, blinking hard. "Excuse me?"

I scoffed. "You heard me. Trying to create a love triangle between us and Ethan has to be about something, and that's the only reason I can come up with."

She flinched and my gut burned with hatred at myself for hurting her, but I dug deep and tried to force myself not to care. "I'm not interested in being a way for you to stay in the papers, and honestly, I can't believe I let you fool me like that. Good luck, Serenity."

I left her sitting in her office, not about to listen to another word she said. Striding out, I felt like the biggest fool in the world, but I'd done what I had to. Now I just had to work on putting it behind me all over again.

When I arrived back at work, I struggled to focus. The guilt gnawed at the edge of my consciousness at all damn times. A little while later, Lance walked in with a client, and instead of being annoyed that he'd dropped in on me, I welcomed the distraction.

"Dash!" he said, waving a hand for the client to follow him in. "You remember Jennifer, right? From college?"

The woman appeared behind him and I grinned, recognizing her immediately. With her flaming red hair and vibrant green eyes, she was as hot now as she'd been back then. Judging by the wide smile that spread on her lips in response to my own, her personality had also remained unchanged.

"Dash St. Clair," she said enthusiastically, opening her arms and beckoning me to her for a hug. "It's good to see you're as scowly as ever. Come on in. Give an old friend some love."

I rolled my eyes at her but gave her a quick hug anyway. "What are you doing here, Jen? It's been ages."

"Yeah, it has, which is why, as soon as my company started considering venues for our annual brown-nosing the clients festival, I knew we had to use the estate. Gives me an excuse to see you two beautiful boys, at least."

I chuckled. "Thanks for choosing us."

She gave me a quick squeeze before she let go and nodded at me. "Of course, babe. Where else would I choose to have a thing like this? It's the estate. I mean, there's no better."

"We should all go out for dinner sometime," Lance said. "It could be fun, right? How about tonight?"

"Sounds great," Jennifer replied easily, then checked her watch. "I need to get going, but call me with plans and I'll see you there."

"Great. See you tonight, Jenny," I said, waiting while she said goodbye to Lance and then turning on him once she was gone. "What was that all about? Dinner?"

He shrugged. "Didn't you hear her? It's been ages. I figured it was the least we could do. How did it go with Serenity?"

"The way it used to at the beginning," I said. "Honestly, I'm not even sure why I tried with her."

"I know why you tried, but I won't tell you yet. Maybe one day, you'll stop getting in your own way."

He said it lightheartedly, so I flipped him off and rolled my eyes as I went back to my desk. "What's the deal with Jennifer? For real, this time. Are you going to try with her? Who knows? If you play your cards right, you could have some fun together."

He laughed. "I guess we'll see at dinner tonight."

I nodded, not really feeling like going but knowing I needed to. Despite my best efforts, Serenity was all I could think about and I was going to drive myself nuts if I kept obsessing about her. For better or for worse, I'd made my decision about us.

Now all I had to do was stick with it—no matter how miserable I was.