48. Hunter

I've been hiding out for a full week, getting things in place.

I went to the follow-up with my OBGYN. My hCG level decreased drastically, meaning no additional appointments are needed. It's done. Over. They assured me yet again that I did nothing wrong. Nothing could have changed the outcome.

The bleeding has stopped, as has most of the cramping. The emotional ache is ever-present, but I've ignored my darkest feelings, choosing to power through as best I can and focus on the other worries and concerns looming over me this week.

My grief will keep. The window to make a clean break will not.

I hold my head high and refuse to let the big feelings consume me as I pass through the front door.

I've done my crying. It's time to move on to the next stage.

I roll one small suitcase over the threshold and onto the stoop, then the other, and readjust the carry-on slung over my shoulder. The rest of my belongings will stay here. Louie assures me the shopping near our new flat is top-notch.

I push up my sunglasses and use them to hold my hair back as I lock the front door of my childhood home for the very last time. Then I use the combination from the realtor to open up the key box. With a clunk of metal on metal, I officially turn in my key.

Without a backward glance, I grab my luggage and charge forward toward my future.

I don't make it more than a single step down the paved walkway that leads to the driveway before my foot slips ever so slightly.

Slowly lifting my leg, I shake off the white piece of paper clinging to my sneaker. It's limp from the humidity and shaped like an airplane. The nose is crushed, as if it hit a hard surface before crashing to the ground.

Greedy.

I've effectively ignored him for the last seven days.

It wasn't easy. He came by the house multiple times, called my old phone nonstop. I purchased a new phone with a new number. I needed an international SIM card anyway. I still packed my old phone, just in case. But I'm not sure I even brought the charger for it.

Thankfully, his attempts slowed as the week went on. According to Levi, South Chapel University started three-a-days, and there's a strict no phones policy when students are on the field.

I bend to pick up the airplane.

When I straighten, I catch sight of a handful more littering the yard.

One is stuck in the gorgeous dogwood tree beside the bay window of the dining room. At least two have made their way to the cul-de-sac.

I don't have to look at them to know each plane has a note for me. A confession of love. A heartfelt plea. His relentless attempts to bridge the canyon between us.

I won't be able to get in the car if I read them all.

But I let myself have just one.

With a harsh breath in, I unfold the paper, taking great care not to rip it.

Temi—There isn't anything I wouldn't do for you.There isn't anything I couldn't love you through.

Holding the damp paper to my chest, I let the words sink. I allow myself to feel all the emotions I've suppressed for just a few seconds.

I envision Greedy writing the notes, searching for the words. Pouring out his heart. Folding the paper airplane just so, hoping to make the connection. Then futilely giving up, night after night, and letting the plane fly, knowing it'll crash into my window.

In my mind's eye, I watch him throw it.

I watch it soar—his words, our love.

The connection we shared, and the summer I'll never forget.

I give myself one last second to feel it all.

Then I drop the paper and watch it flutter back to the ground.

It's for the best.

It's for him.

He'll eventually move on, and his life will be categorically better without me.

There's a poetic tragedy to paper airplanes.

No matter how much care and detail has been poured into them, they all fall eventually. They're fragile and easily damaged. Their first flight is usually their one and only chance to soar.

Paper airplanes are doomed from the start, even if the few seconds of flight are full of hope and lightness and fun. Those few seconds make it almost worth the inevitable fall.

Almost, but not quite.

I picked Levi up at the QuickieMart, then didn't tell him where we were headed until we were getting off at the exit for the airport. After a futile attempt at trying to convince me to stay, he finally agreed to support my plan.

"Thanks for doing this." I circle around to the trunk of my car to retrieve my luggage, then hand over the key to the boy who's become my best friend over the last few months.

Head bowed and lips turned down, he accepts my offering. "You know I'd do anything for you, Daisy."

He looks so defeated. Tears well in my eyes, and my lip wobbles when I meet his gaze.

Levi has quickly become the most trusted person in my life.

He knows things about me now that no one else knows—that no one else will ever know.

I'll never forget the way he helped me and held me and treated me with so much care.

I hate that this is it. That I won't be around to return the favor when he needs it. Even more, I hate that I'm hurting him by leaving.

"You're sure?" he asks for the hundredth time.

If I had to guess, he and Greedy believed some time and space were all I needed to get past the shock of my mother marrying Greedy's father.

It's so much more than that. As dramatic as it may seem, it's going to take an entire ocean of distance to move on and forget what I have to let go of here in North Carolina.

"I'm sure," I tell him, lifting my chin and meeting his eye. "I know you don't agree with me—"

"I don't," he interjects.

"Levi…" I try once more. "You don't know her like I do."

I've spent the last week telling Levi about my mom, trying to make him understand. I've never talked to anyone about her dark side before. I've always kept the worst details to myself, either because I was afraid to trust or because I didn't want to burden others. It turns out that opening up to Levi was easier than I thought.

His mom is equally awful, but in totally different ways. It was validating and eye-opening to see his reaction to some of the things I shared, especially when I got into details about the last year.

"I know you don't agree," I say, "but please tell me you at least understand."

I don't need his approval. I don't need the approval of anyone. Greedy will never forgive me. Hell, I don't think I'll ever forgive myself.

But if Levi can hold space for me or admit he understands, then maybe I can find some semblance of peace.

When Levi says nothing, I change tack.

"You know how he is."

It's the same justification I've relied on all week.

When Levi says nothing, I push harder. "He's intense. Relentless. Greedy wouldn't give up if I stuck around. Eventually, he'd wear me down."

I heave both my bags out of the car to distract myself from thinking any more about him.

"And that would be so bad?" Levi challenges, taking the bags from me.

I meet his gaze again, considering. Car horns blast, and drivers weave in and out of parked cars while people come and go. Everyone has somewhere to be. Including me.

I throw my arms around Levi's neck and hug him fiercely.

"You're leaving for California, Duke. You'll have a new state, new friends, a whole new life. Greedy has football. His honors program. His dad." I let go of his neck and drop my arms to my sides. "If I stayed, I'd have—"

"Us," he says, the word clipped. "You have us."

I dig my nails into the palms of my hands, concentrating on the sharp sting of each point to keep the tears prickling behind my eyes at bay.

"Had. I had you, Duke. Both of you." I shrug, biting down on my bottom lip. "And for one perfect summer, you two were all I needed."

I throw my arms around his torso once more and squeeze him tight, effectively ending the conversation. Eventually, he wraps his arms around me, too, and awkwardly pats my hair as we embrace in the drop-off lane of the airport.

I release him, then spin and close the trunk with a definitive thunk.

He shoves his hands into his pockets and rocks back on his heels. "If you ever change your mind—"

"I know. And you have my new number," I remind him. "But please, Levi, I beg you—"

"I won't share it," he promises me softly.

It's killing him to keep secrets from Greedy. I know I'm asking too much. But Levi has become important to me in a way that no one else in my life is. I hate that I'm making him pick sides and that I essentially forced him to pick me. It's a shitty situation all around.

"You've got everything you need?" he asks, nodding down to my two suitcases and the carry-on over my shoulder.

"If I don't, I've got my soon-to-be stepdad's gold AmEx in my wallet. I'll be fine. Now please go before you make me cry."

He bends low, pulls me close once more, and kisses the top of my head.

"Love you, Daisy," he murmurs.

"Later, Duke."