Chapter 26

Chapter Twenty-Six

T aylor eased into the worn leather chair in her sunlit living room, holding a steaming cup of herbal tea and a book about moving on from trauma that her therapist had recommended.

“Pay attention to your patterns. The way you learned to survive may not be the way you want to continue to live your life.” Such a great quote and one that felt pertinent not only to her own life, but to her sisters and her mother.

Lennon sat only a foot or so away in her bouncy seat, cooing quietly as she played with the new selection of toys Sam had hung in front of it the night before.

“You will never have to heal from your childhood,” Taylor whispered to her, meaning it from the bottom of her heart.

She sipped from her mug, savoring the faint taste of Chai. From Alice’s room, she could hear the faint sounds of Quig laughing with Alice. They were doing homework, and turns out that Quig was a math geek, the only subject that Alice needed help with at times.

Taylor still couldn’t quite believe it. A few weeks ago, the thought of hiring an assistant/nanny—especially someone she’d met in jail—would’ve seemed absurd. But in just over a week and a half, Quig had turned out to be nothing short of a miracle.

The idea had been Sam’s, of all people. After another tense morning where Taylor had been trying to juggle Lennon, Johnny, laundry, and a pile of paperwork, he’d suggested it.

Since Lucy had gone to stay at Jo’s house and left Johnny with them, Taylor had even more to come home to worry about. They felt Johnny was best with them, so they didn’t want to say anything to Lucy about helping, but it was a lot.

“What about Quig?” he’d said, as casually as if he were suggesting takeout for dinner.

“Quig?” Taylor had blinked at him in disbelief. “From jail? Are you serious?”

Sam had shrugged. “You need someone you are really comfortable with, and she’s got a good heart. You said so yourself. She’s obviously eager to turn her life around. And it’s not like we’re hiring her to manage finances or to be a nanny. I heard her tell you how hard it is to get a good job since she has a criminal background. She could help you around here.”

“Sam, I really like Quig and, yes, we bonded, but we can’t let someone we don’t know that well handle our baby,” she’d said.

“That’s fine. There’s still housework, cooking, and errands. And once we trust her completely, we can consider letting her help with Lennon. You’ve got enough going on without trying to do it all alone, and you refuse to rest like you should when I’m outside working. You also feel guilty that you aren’t helping on the farm, and, if we had someone to help, I could step in more and you could relax.”

“Sam, don’t be ridiculous,” Taylor said. “I’m fine. Really—I am.”

But that night, she’d thought about how much help Quig could be, and how the girl was stuck working a job she hated, because of her past mistakes. The next day, they made the call. Quig had shown up on her doorstep within hours, a duffel bag slung over her shoulder, her wide grin betraying both nerves and excitement. Considering it was far from a glamorous or high-paying job they were offering; Quig was pretty excited.

“I promise, I won’t let you down,” she’d said earnestly, her fingers twisting the strap of her bag.

And so far, she hadn’t. In just a short time, Quig had seamlessly integrated into their lives. She had a knack for reading the room, knowing exactly when to step in and when to hang back. In the mornings, Quig was there at six and, while Taylor nursed and took care of Lennon, Quig balanced the chaos of bottles, toys, and a perpetually sticky highchair. Whether it be a dirty sink or a pile of laundry, when she saw something that needed done, she dived into it without being asked.

By late afternoon when Lennon was down for a nap, Quig was in the barn, tending to the animals or checking in with boarders. She was efficient in the kennels, and the animals loved her. Cecil swore she was a pale angel sent from heaven to keep him entertained with all her stories. Turns out she’d led quite a colorful life thus far.

Taken to her instantly, Cecil welcomed Quig into his cabin like a long-lost daughter. On the nights he needed to stay on the farm, he slept on the couch in the office, but Sam said that he’d seen Cecil and Quig in the evenings on his porch, swapping stories and sipping sweet tea next to a small heater.

Quig tried to tell him that she didn’t mind him sleeping under the same roof, but he claimed he didn’t want to sully a young woman’s reputation, ignoring the fact that Quig was a felon who had three children by three different men. He pretended not to see the teardrop tattoo next to her eye, and the scar from over her eyebrow where she’d had another one removed .

Despite her background, everyone liked Quig. It was a good lesson for the younger kids that they should never judge anyone based on appearance. Quig sure didn’t look like the girl next door, and she had a record to boot, but, in her core, she was a genuinely nice person who only wanted to help everyone. The fact that she’d made a lot of bad decisions in her life was something they didn’t talk about.

Even Alice was over the moon because, now that Quig was around, there were less chores and more reading time for her, though she’d never complained much about helping out.

Taylor couldn’t deny the shift in the house’s energy. Now that things were running smoother and getting done, there was less tension. For Taylor specifically there was less of the overwhelming pressure that had been crushing her for months.

But as much as Taylor appreciated Quig’s presence, there was still a part of her that struggled to let go of her many responsibilities. Worries, too. Like about Lucy, who didn’t seem to be improving as fast as she should.

Also about her helping out with the family business. Sam was stepping up more, but Taylor felt guilty that her position had been taken apart, her responsibilities doled out to Cate and her sisters—with Ellis, Sam, and Cecil—and now Quig, too, to take up her slack.

“Taylor?”

Quig’s voice pulled her from her thoughts. She approached from the hallway. “Want me to keep Lennon company while you catch a break. Maybe take a nap? I still have an hour before I’m due at the barn.”

Taylor hesitated, her fingers tightening around her mug. “You don’t have to do that. You’ve already been running around all morning. Why don’t you rest?”

Quig grinned, her eyes sparkling. “Nah, napping is hard for me. Too much nervous energy. Alice is done with her homework, and my other choice is going down early to help Jo with the goat pen. Honestly, Lennon is way more fun than goat poop, but I am fine with either task.”

Taylor laughed despite herself. “Alright. But I’m not going to nap. I think I’ll walk down and talk to Jo for a bit. Get some fresh air. If Lennon gets fussy, text me.”

“Will do, but don’t forget to stand upwind from the goats if you want fresh air.” She laughed as she plopped down and took a place on the floor in front of Lennon, who smiled widely and kicked her feet, happy at the sight of her new friend.

Taylor slid her feet into her muck boots, grabbed a coat, and stepped outside. The quick slap of crisp air stung her cheeks but was a relief from the too warm interior of the house. Sam insisted they keep the temperature at seventy-three degrees for Lennon, and sometimes it felt like a sauna.

She looked back through the window of the door one more time before stepping off the porch. It was still strange, this feeling of not being entirely needed. For so long, she’d been the one holding everything together, the glue that kept her family from crumbling. But now, with Quig’s help and Sam’s encouragement, Taylor was starting to realize that maybe she didn’t have to carry the weight alone. She’d also been making strides with putting thoughts of her job aside and hadn’t contacted Shane since she’d arrived home.

She did wonder about the Colburn case, but the realization that she really could step away from it did wonders for her mental state. The thought of having that freedom was both liberating and terrifying. It presented so many questions.

Who was she without being a deputy and protecting the town?

What was she supposed to do with her dream of making detective one day ?

Could being a wife and mother, and sharing duties with the family business, be enough?

A few buzzards circled over her head in the clear, blue sky, reminding her that not everything was rosy. Right now, things were good but, somewhere, something troublesome was always brewing.