53. Hunter

Chapter 53

Hunter

now

I wake up in the middle of a tangle of bodies. We've formed a human knot in our sleep. Though someone's lying on my arm, and my legs are twisted up in the sheets with someone else, I love it.

I close my eyes, intent on drifting back to sleep.

For a moment, I breathe deeply, reveling in what we shared. Thrilled that they're still here, that they stayed, and that this feels like the start of something familiar but new.

Despite my best efforts, I'm not comfortable enough to drift off again. My body aches, but not just in the delicious, well-fucked way.

There's a tightness in my lower back that stretches around my hip and down my quads.

The longer I'm awake, the more noticeable the pain. It only takes a few moments to recognize the cramps radiating through the front of my pelvis.

Quietly, slowly, I untangle myself from the boys .

Once I'm out of bed, I take a moment to drink in the scene. Greedy and Levi are in bed, both still out. Though they flanked me when I woke, they've already readjusted in my absence.

Levi's flat on his stomach, head turned on the pillow, and Greedy's got one arm wrapped around his waist.

My heart pangs. They're adorable.

After another moment where I soak in the details, I force myself to trudge into the bathroom.

I avoid looking in the mirror. After last night, I can only imagine that disheveled wouldn't even begin to describe my current status.

Tapping the switch for the dim light over the shower, I shuffle my way to the toilet. I relieve myself, and when I wipe, the slickness tells me exactly what I'll find before I even glance down.

I take a deep, cleansing breath, and then another, and wipe away all the reddish-brown discharge that signals the start of my period.

I dig through my toiletry bag and grab a menstrual disc, insert it, then wash my hands thoroughly.

On my way back into the bedroom, I grab the first T-shirt I can find on the floor.

It's unlikely that I'll sleep anymore tonight, but I could use a glass of water. Maybe a snack, too, if I'm going to take ibuprofen for the cramps.

I venture downstairs and am not at all surprised to find Kabir set up in the main living area.

He doesn't see me as I quietly watch him from the shadows. He's wearing lounge pants and nothing else. God, he's gorgeous.

He's focused on his work, with a computer, a tablet, and a few notepads spread out on the coffee table. I don't know whether he's up because he's also not tired or if this is necessary, since I'm keeping him away from his work.

"Hey," I whisper as I approach, not wanting to startle him.

Regardless of my intent, his gaze snaps up.

Assessing me from head to toe, he sets his notepad aside. Then he closes his computer .

"Everything all right?"

With a nod and a yawn, I make my way over to him. "Can I sit with you?"

He holds out an arm and rests it on the back of the couch. Gratefully, I plop down into his lap.

One hand caresses my nape, and his lips find my temple, giving me the most tender, loving kiss.

"Are you well, love?" he asks.

Another yawn catches me by surprise. Once it passes, I answer.

"My period just started." I curl up into a smaller, tighter ball.

"Really?" He moves a hand to my low back, massaging and applying pressure where it always aches during the first few days of my cycle. "This is you on your period?"

"I guess," I admit, tucking my chin.

I can't fault him for being surprised. Based on his tone, he's impressed, too. The way I handle the symptoms of PMDD these days is a far cry from what he remembers, I'm sure. These days, I'm so much better at dealing with the physical pain and the mental anguish of this awful disease.

"This is me on hormonal birth control and a daily SSRI, plus using an additional anxiety med for sleepless nights. This is me meditating daily, drinking minimal caffeine, and staying locked away from the world for three or four days a month to cope. But yeah. This is me on my period."

Spence's hold on me tightens. "It's night and day, love. I'm so proud of you."

I peer up, basking in his praise.

"I always assumed things continued to get better, that you were well and that you were thriving. But when I didn't hear from you…" He trails off, and I know he won't push.

But now that he's here and that it's clear he isn't going anywhere anytime soon, I want to fill in the blanks. He deserves to know what happened between London and now.

"I met someone after I left London. "

He remains stoic, but in true Kabir fashion, he asks a clarifying question.

"You met someone who isn't me, Levi, or Garrett Reed?"

Pursing my lips, I nod. "His name is Sione."

"You met him in Italy, I take it?"

I murmur a noncommittal sound. Did I tell Kabir where I went or where I stayed after I left him in the UK? I don't recall getting into those specifics—

"You fell in love in Italy," he surmises, his voice even and knowing.

I guess I didn't have to fill in the blanks for him after all.

"I didn't mean to—"

With two fingers, Spence tips my chin back, forcing me to meet his gaze.

"You didn't have to. I know you, Hunter St. Clair. I know your heart. When you didn't come back to me, I knew you'd found someone worth staying for."

I gulp past the shame that washes over me as he speaks the very real truth. Kabir and I were never supposed to be anything but sex. Instead, he became my savior, my anchor, a person I could see myself spending the rest of my life with.

And yet I ran.

I ran just like I always do.

A version of myself who could have been content exists inside me. I honestly believe I could have been deliriously happy living in London with Spence. But I wasn't whole enough at the time to commit to him or to the idea of what I wanted my future to look like.

I was different after my time in London. I wasn't broken anymore, but I wasn't the same.

"I missed you," I assure him. "I thought about you every day."

"Tell me about Sione," Spence encourages, turning the conversation back to my time in Italy.

"His grandparents own a handful of villas near Lake Como. He's my age, also a student, but he spends his summers helping them with tourist season. He plans to go into holistic healthcare or alternative medicine. He taught me yoga and how to meditate. He taught me so much about myself," I confess, my heart aching at the thought of the boy who helped restore my spirit in so many beautiful ways.

"So I was dumped for an Italian bohemian?" Spence jibes.

Snorting, I duck my head. He's kidding, but the sting of shame is ever-present when I consider the way I left. The way I always leave.

"Sione's not Italian," I explain, forcing myself to look him in the eye. "He's Tongan-Romanian. His grandparents are Romanian. They just live in Italy during the summers."

My chest warms at the memory of Mammamia and Moulshi. I miss them.

"And where is he now?"

I turn my head away, ashamed to admit what he probably already knows.

"Did you part on bad terms?" Spence presses.

I'm silent again, even as I know he won't let me get away with it.

Gently gripping my chin, he turns me back to face him. "Answer me, Firecracker. Where is your Italian lover boy, and did you part on bad terms?"

"We didn't part at all," I admit.

His eyes flash when it clicks. "You ran."

Holding his gaze, I nod. Then, sheepishly, I add, "It's possible he thinks we're still together…"

Kabir raises both brows, offering me an amused expression. "Are you?"

I hit him with a glare, but when heat flares behind his eyes at the challenge, I force a neutral expression.

"You just choreographed a three-way between me, my boyfriend, and my stepbrother, Spence. Then you made them both finish on my face. I think it's pretty clear that I'm with you now. "

He swats playfully at my ass, shaking his head and chuckling. "You're lucky you're on the rag and your hormones are all out of whack, love. Besides, it was an excellent three-way, if I do say so myself."

Heat swirls in my belly, even as I snort in response to his cocky comment. "It really was." Settling into his chest, I trace along the hard muscle on either side of his breastbone. "I miss him," I admit.

"Sione?"

"Mm-hmm," I hum, finally feeling the pulls of slumber. "He still texts me sometimes. Sweet messages, usually around my period, like he's still tracking it, even though I haven't seen him in half a year."

Kabir brushes my hair out of my face, tucking it behind my ear. "Do you want to see him? We could go to Italy on holiday before your classes start back up."

I shake my head. "I can't leave Levi." Then there's the whole debacle with my mom.

"Don't say no yet." Kabir drops his arm around me and pulls me closer. "Think about it. We could all go."

"We?"

"You, me, and the boys," he explains, his tone the definition of casual. "We should start to consider ourselves a unit if we plan to carry on in this manner."

Hope sparks inside me. Not for the first time in the past twenty-four hours, it feels like we have a real shot.

"I'm sorry I left London the way I did," I tell him.

With a shake of his head, he grunts. "I'm not. You're doing so well, love. This version of you wouldn't be possible without your time in Italy. Without any of the events that happened between then and now."

He kisses the top of my head again.

"Besides, I knew it wasn't really goodbye for you and me."

"How?" I ask through a yawn.

"I've told you before, love. We're endgame."