Chapter 22

TWENTY-TWO

SOPHIE

Well, she said yes . And not just any yes, but an enthusiastic, breathy, sugar-dripping, resounding yes. Sophie held Ella’s hand from the garage to the elevator to outside her apartment door. When she had to drop it to open the door, she missed the warmth of her touch immediately.

“Wow… this place is so warm and homey. The colors, everything. I love it.” Ella tugged her shoes off at the door and continued scanning the apartment. “It’s great.”

Sophie’s place was great. After she’d saved for a year to make sure she had a proper nest egg, she’d moved into this apartment at twenty-one and couldn’t imagine moving out. The place was everything she wanted—modern, warm, quiet. Yet, she couldn’t help but think of Ella’s gazillion-square-foot bedroom, her kitchen island the size of a king bed, and wondering if Ella was secretly comparing it to her own place.

But as Ella stood in the corner, a genuine perma-grin forming, all signs indicated that she really did like Sophie’s apartment.

“Can I get you something to drink? Eat?” Sophie fidgeted with her key before placing it on the hook. Everything sludged in slow motion. She was pretty sure if Ella felt the way she did, they could skip all this formality and just move toward the bedroom. But suggesting that felt like a player move, and Sophie was seriously out of practice.

Jesus, her hands needed to stop sweating. She was a career woman with a great apartment, great job, great friends… not some teen about to lose their virginity. She’d had sex before, dammit. Sure, infrequent at best, but she wasn’t clueless how this happened. “Not sure what I all have. Life of a bachelorette, am I right? Probably like raspberry soda, coffee, which I know you won’t have, um…” Sophie rested her forearm on top of the open fridge door and strummed her fingertips across the top. “Let’s see… let’s see… leftover Chinese, but we might want to skip that. Probably way past its expiration. Oh, cheese? Scrambled?—”

A gentle hand on her hip broke her last words. Ella’s fingertips fanned her side, and she rested her chin on Sophie’s shoulder. “Raspberry soda sounds perfect.” Her voice was a whisper, calm and collected, and everything Sophie needed to drop her rigid shoulders.

She grabbed two sodas and moved to the couch. Ella’s footsteps followed her, and once they sagged onto the sofa, Ella skimmed her finger across Sophie’s stockings.

“Are you okay?” Ella asked.

Sophie took a sip, the bubbles fizzing her throat. “Honestly? I’m freaking out a little. Like, I love this.” She motioned between the two. “I’ve had the most incredible time with you. And, ahem, I think we’re maybe thinking the same, but I’m not sure, and sometimes I get super in my head about things, and it’s been a long time…”

Ella rested her elbow on the couch backing and leaned her head into her hands. “Do you want to have sex, with me, tonight?”

Wow. Well, she just said it. Bluntly, firmly, with zero trepidation in her words. “Well… um… if we’re both feeling that…” She scraped her thumbnail against her other thumbnail. “It’s kind of been a long time.”

Ella raised an eyebrow. “Oh yeah? How long?”

Why was she embarrassed? She felt the pink rise to her cheeks, and she gulped down more drink to counteract the heat filling her face. “Like a year ago, just a quick, one-night thing. And before that, honestly, a handful of times in my adulthood.”

The information seemed to settle on Ella as she slowly grinned. “Oooh… was it hot?”

Huh?

“The one-night thing. Was it hot?” Ella’s expectant wide eyes flickered with deviancy.

“You don’t really want to hear this, do you?” The last thing Sophie would want to hear was about a partner’s former escapades.

“No, for real. I do.” Ella turned her body more toward Sophie and licked her lips. “I’m a little freaky like that. It’s like being a voyeur without the whole invasion of privacy thing.”

God, this woman is incredible . No jealousy, no nerves, just curiosity. At work, Sophie was on top of everything. She owned that space, confident in the way she spoke to her team, in the way she moved her body, in the information she disseminated. But relationships, sex, being joyful with someone besides her friends, was foreign. “It was really fucking hot.”

“Gah! Tell me everything.” Ella strummed her fingers together and bounced in her seat.

Sophie laughed and leaned back. She told Ella about a happy hour event last year—which she was not feeling at all—so she distracted herself by making flirty eyes with a woman across the bar who looked equally as miserable. When she excused herself to go to the bar, the woman followed her. She was funny, sexy, and they chatted. Ended up making out in the bathroom, then getting an Uber to her place, and doing things she only read about in spicy lesbian romances.

Ella peppered in questions, leaned back, and fanned her face. Sophie had never opened up so much about a past sexual relation, and frankly wouldn’t want to be on the receiving end of this information. But Ella clearly loved every second of it, and the room heated several degrees as she kept talking.

The room quieted, and Sophie set her empty can on the coffee table. This felt so good, too good. Was it too good? Or was this just how relationships worked? Right now, she felt she could tell Ella anything, and she’d nod, ask questions, and be genuinely interested in what she had to say. She didn’t want to lose this moment, this feeling, ever. She wanted to be happy. She deserved to be happy.

Ella clicked on the top of the soda can. “What are you scared of?”

Not are you scared . But what . It was like she could read Sophie’s insides. “So many things.” Sophie let out a chuckle, but it was true. “Getting hurt. Getting too happy. Feeling what I’m feeling right now forever. Not feeling what I’m feeling right now for the rest of my life, and what it will do to me if that feeling fades.” She took a deep breath, the words constricting in her chest. “I, er, I saw your profile on an app looking for a one-night-only type relationship. And you do you, for real. But I’m looking for more. I need more.”

Ella’s head tilted to the side. Her eyes narrowed, widened, and she grinned. “Oh my God, I totally forgot about that profile. I deleted that app like a week after I set it up.” She set the soda on the coffee table and crisscrossed her legs. “I did that more out of spite than anything. It was right after Jasmine and I broke up and I tried to convince myself I didn’t need anything more than a hookup.”

Ah. “And now what do you think you need?”

Ella’s eyelashes dipped to her cheek, and for the first time tonight, she looked sheepish. “I need you.” The words ghosted the room with their delicacy but hit with the weight of a thousand pounds.

Sophie dangled a finger in Ella’s silky hair, before she tucked the strand behind Ella’s ear. She pulled her close, gripped her head lightly, her thumbs swiping her cheeks. The air quieted, still, and Sophie could hear her heartbeat thud in her chest. She pressed her mouth against Ella’s, savoring the raspberry on her lips. Ella pressed back into her, sliding against her mouth, her fingers scraping gently up Sophie’s arm.

A waterfall of shivers fell from her arms to her belly to her toes, and Sophie pressed for more. Ella’s smooth, velvety tongue met Sophie’s, and she moaned into Sophie’s mouth. Sophie’s hands grazed Ella’s thigh, her neck, her shoulder as Sophie searched for more open skin.

Ella’s collarbone, the crook of her neck, tasted so sweet, the softest mix of salty skin, and Sophie could have nuzzled there forever. “Is this okay?” she asked as she danced her mouth to below Ella’s ear, her forehead, and across her jawline.

“Yes…” Ella murmured, her fingers pressing into Sophie’s back.

Ella draped a leg over Sophie, then shifted on the couch. Everything was slow, intense, and also… super uncomfortable. Why did she wear the fishnet stockings that were now digging into her skin? Sophie needed more space, she wanted to explore, to know Ella on every level, and this couch was not doing it.

“Do you want to move to the bedroom?” Sophie pulled back to read Ella’s eyes, but barely had a chance.

Ella leapt up, tossed her glasses to the side table, and tugged Sophie to her. “Yes, please, for the love of everything holy.” She kissed Sophie, grinning into her mouth.

In the hallway, they got distracted. Ella pushed Sophie into the wall, kissing her with the promise of tomorrow, with the promise of safety, with honesty and encouragement. Sophie’s knees buckled under the intensity, and her fingers found the dip in Ella’s hip, the curve of her backside. She lowered her hands, cupping Ella’s ass, pushing into her hips. Shit, she needed friction. She needed Ella’s hands and mouth, her sweet kisses, and her laughter. She needed the confidence, the salty personality, and her smart mouth.

Ella’s hands found Sophie’s thigh, tugged it up high, and hooked it behind her hip. She pushed her thigh in between Sophie’s legs, and the motion was incendiary, lighting her, sparking her alive. “This good?” Ella asked, gripping Sophie’s face, sucking on her bottom lip, circling her tongue on Sophie’s ring.

“So good.” Sophie breathed into Ella’s mouth. Her pulse raced, thudded so loud in her chest, in her neck, even her scalp prickled. Dizzy, she leaned into the wall for support. She smiled into the kiss, consumed the kiss. She dropped her leg and yanked Ella toward the bedroom.

Clothes on the floor were kicked to the side, the door wide open, hallway and living room lights on. Sophie needed this now. Her body ached, glorious and fevered, her skin puckered with the anticipation of having Ella in her mouth.

They tripped their way into the bed, frantic and rushed. If Sophie waited another minute, another second, she’d burst. Sophie ripped her fishnets stockings off and kicked them to the side. Ella tugged Sophie’s sweater over her head and tossed it to the floor, then ripped off her own sweater. God, she was incredible. So full, so round, and Sophie wanted to put her mouth on everything.

Sophie straddled Ella, her heart thumping against her chest wall, and slowed her movements. She wanted to savor every part of Ella. She pulled back, linking in her fingers with Ella, and kissed the top of Ella’s fingertips. When she dropped her hands, Ella sat up, holding Sophie firmly, strong behind her, and put her mouth on Sophie’s neck. Breath heated Sophie’s skin, and she turned to putty.

Ella traced her finger, a ghost of a touch, across Sophie’s chest. She planted a kiss on Sophie’s cleavage, her shoulder, her neck. She dragged a finger, tracing the outline of Sophie’s breast with the softest of touches. How could something that was a whisper, a graze, make her feel like this? All curled toes and hair on fire and it was like Ella was touching her, really touching her, on the inside.

The pads of Sophie’s fingers pressed into Ella’s back and she let Ella lower her racerback bra straps. She kissed and nipped at the freshly bare skin, then removed the bra. “Oh, Sophie… you’re so beautiful…” She cupped Sophie in her hands, her thumbs gliding across Sophie’s nipples, and Sophie crumbled under the touch. All the fear of opening herself up melted with each trace, with each kiss. This was all a dream, but she didn’t care. She never needed to wake up.

Ella brushed her lips against the sensitive skin around her breasts, leaving the skin wet and hungry. She hovered, then blew a soft flutter of air across the wet skin, and if Ella didn’t pull Sophie into her mouth right now, she wouldn’t be able to stand it. Sophie’s skin scorched, blushed, and… oh shit… yes. Ella’s mouth latched around Sophie’s nipple, and Sophie’s body arched into her in response. “Ella… oh… so good. Don’t stop, please don’t stop.” A delicious symphony of pinching, sucking, licking, and moans swirled, and Sophie could die this moment and be happy.

Breaths and squeaky bedsprings and luxurious sighs bounced from the walls. Ella hopped off the bed and removed the rest of her clothing, with no fear, no hesitation. Sophie saw her future—in her pale skin, in the way her eyes danced, in the curve of her hips, and her mouth, oh… her soft sweet mouth.

Ella straddled her now, and Sophie clutched at her hips. Sophie pulled Ella into her, wanting to touch every part of her skin, wanting, needing to feel closer. She cupped Ella’s breasts into her hand, so full, so beautiful. “Are you okay? Still good?”

“Everything is fucking… delicious. We can do everything.” Ella moaned into her ear.

Sophie wrapped her lips around Ella’s breasts, and oh… Christ… this, her, having her, feeling Ella grip her neck to push into her more… it was too much and not enough and she needed more.

Not enough air existed, but Sophie didn’t care. Exploring, learning everything about Ella, what she liked, what she craved, what she needed, was the only thing Sophie needed. Ella pulled Sophie to her mouth, her kisses strong, full, and Sophie breathed her air, gasped against her mouth. Her skin tingled pink. Her chest stretched and filled and… oh God. This. All she needed was this, Ella, them.

Thighs and knees and fingers and tongues danced across flesh. Ella ground into Sophie, lowering herself, and put Sophie’s thigh between her legs. Feeling Ella’s want on the top of her leg fevered Sophie. She wanted every part of Ella in her mouth, on her fingers, in her hand.

Ella kissed Sophie’s belly, trailing her tongue down her side, as Sophie quivered and goose bumps skittered across her body. Hot breaths filled her skin, heated her, and she needed Ella. All of Ella.

Ella hovered at Sophie’s center, blushing her fevered skin.

“Can I…” Ella asked through pants.

“Yes, yes, everything, so good, yes…” Incoherent words bumbled from Sophie.

And then Ella’s mouth was on Sophie’s center, and Sophie lost the ability to speak. Moans and sweat filled the room, filled her skin. She wasn’t sure who was louder, Ella or her. Hooking Sophie’s leg above her shoulder, Ella was in full, complete control, experienced and driven. When she dipped in one, then two, fingers to join her mouth, her breath, her tongue, Sophie turned to liquid and she gripped at the sheets. With every rhythmic glide, Sophie felt how beautiful she was, how worthy, how wanted. Ella tasted her with promise, with decision, showing Sophie she wanted this as much as her. “You’re so beautiful… so incredible…” She hummed against Sophie’s core, and Sophie felt whole, complete, powerless, and powerful. Connecting with Ella, feeling this… She was inside out, upside down, no longer feeling human, yet the most human she’d ever been.

What Sophie wanted, true connection, welding together, interlocking dreams, and hopes and desires, unfolded with every motion. Ella’s tongue moved more, wider, softer, then firmer. Sophie’s body arched and pressed into Ella as she read Sophie’s body, a maestro conducting the perfect symphony, knowing when to increase, when to decrease, less pressure, oh God, more… pressure, definitely more pressure. The moment was building, the crescendo tapping against her insides, at first a faint vibration. It grew, heavier now, the trembles increasing, heightening, her moans loud and intense, and she was so close . The quivering started harder now, lower in her belly, and then… yes, right there, one more… tension seized her body and she broke, the waves crashing, pulsating, releasing.

On top of Sophie’s shivering body, Ella pulled back and rested her head on Sophie’s belly, her chest rising and lowering against Sophie’s skin. Ella’s heart pounded against Sophie, her skin dewy and glistening and perfect. No words were spoken, none needed to be.

She was boneless. A pile of useless mush that had no words, no thoughts, no energy. When Ella rolled herself off from Sophie and lay next to her, Sophie lifted her arm to tug her back, but was useless. Moments passed, breaths returned to stable breathing, and Sophie leaned her head onto Ella’s chest.

As Ella’s fingertips lazed across Sophie’s buzzed head, thoughts slowly took shape. Sophie knew what this was, and she was ready. She was open. And it was time.

Recovery was much quicker than expected. The need to know Ella in the same way, to make Ella feel as good as she made Sophie, overtook Sophie. She trailed a fingertip down Ella’s stomach. “Please, please, let me do that to you.”