13. FIELD

FIELD

S itting at the island going over his work had taken hours, and before I knew it, the lock on the front door had popped, and my heart dropped into my stomach.

“Don’t say a word,” I warned Ryan as his eyes drifted over my head to the front door.

I hadn’t put my wig back on as per his request, and for some reason, the idea of my parents seeing me like this—messy hair, dirty sweater, half-eaten cake on the island strewn about with a bunch of half-finished English papers—shook my confidence.

Ryan being here would cause my mother to riot, but in the most constricted, fake way her nature would allow. She’d likely thank him for coming to our home before shooing him out the door to scold me for two hours about the rules and regulations of our house and the importance of screening everyone who enters our front door.

“Lorraine?” Her voice echoed through the empty house to the kitchen, and my entire body tensed at the sound.

“In here, Mom,” I said.

As she and Dad came around the corner, tired from travel but still looking pristine, Dad stripped from his suit jacket and rolled his sleeves when he stopped in the doorway of the kitchen behind my mother in her pearl dress shirt and matching skirt.

Ryan rose off the stool behind me and straightened out against my back. His breathing was slow and methodical as my father studied him and then looked back at me.

“Who’s this?” He asked me as he stepped into the kitchen.

I opened my mouth to explain, but Ryan was faster, and I mumbled a few tame curse words at the sound of his voice. I kept forgetting that his listening skills left much to be desired.

“Ryan Cody, Mayor Field.” Ryan stepped out from behind me and held out his hand.

“Robert Cody’s boy, you live off Lorne Way, the farm.”

“That’s correct, sir,” Ryan said.

I had to stifle the laughter that uncharacteristically bubbled from me at the sight of Ryan being so polite.

“Your brother, Robert Jr., comes to town hall meetings with him. I’ve never seen you there.” My Dad pointed out. Faces, that was his entire election campaign, and he never forgot a face, which meant he was taking care of everyone in the town. The idea that he could remember everyone was absurd, but the town had believed every word and he had been elected and re-elected.

I could feel my mother's gaze on my face as I watched them talk.

It burned like hot metal; unfortunately, I had to sit and take it from her.

“Until I graduate, my focus is on school and baseball, sir.”

My Dad’s expression tightened at his answer.

“And why are you in my home with my daughter, Mr. Cody?” He asked Ryan.

“She’s tutoring me in English, sir,” Ryan answered without hesitation.

“Seems your focus slipped.” The backhanded comment landed because I watched Ryan’s shoulder blades come together beneath his shirt.

“English was never my strong suit, sir, but I reached out for help, and my grade is coming up.” I wasn’t sure how honest of a statement it was because he hadn't handed in any of his missing assignments yet, and his grade was stagnant, just like his baseball career.

Suspended in time until he figured out how to balance it all in the small pocket of his baseball mitt.

“I hope the time spent with my daughter has helped, but I do ask that if you’re coming over to our home, you pick a day when we’re home. I’m not comfortable with the idea of you being alone with Lorraine, " he said.

I held in the sigh, grinding my teeth together to keep the frustrated sound deep within me as my mother watched my every move.

“Unfortunately, I wasn’t comfortable with her being alone, especially not on her birthday, so I apologize for breaking the rules, but I will do it again.”

All of the air was sucked from the room in a violent woosh as the words left Ryan’s lips. My father’s hands curled around the island's edges as he straightened out and hovered over Ryan ominously. My Mother’s face was priceless, shock laced with disgust at Ryan’s outburst.

That’s what she would call it. I could hear her voice now, yelling over the sound of my father slamming things in his office after Ryan left.

“It was nice to meet you, Mr. Cody, but it’s time you left.”

“Yeah, figured as much.” He nodded tightly, a few strands of dirty blonde hair falling against his cheeks as he winked at me. “I’ll see you at school on Monday.” He said, stepping back and reaching around me to grab his bag from the stool behind me. His lips brushing against my cheek was enough to turn them pink as he backed away. “Happy Birthday, Starlight.”

I watched as he held his hand to my mother, “Ma’am.”

She looked down at it and then over at me with a scowl before curling her arms across her chest.

“Alright,” Ryan nodded, his voice low and tight. “Monday,” he repeated, and he sidestepped around my mother toward the front door.

The three of us stood in silence as it opened and closed with a loud click.

“How dare you,” my Mother sighed. “You know the rules, Lorraine.”

“I’m tutoring him. It’s for school.” I defended quietly, curling in on myself to become smaller as my father rounded the island to hover in front of me.

“Do all of the students you tutor show such affection?” He asked me.

“He’s just like that, it was nothing. He was causing a scene because you made him uncomfortable.” I argued. “Which you didn’t have to do. We weren’t doing anything besides homework.”

“This is my house, Lorraine, and you are my daughter. Start acting like it.” Were his next words before leaving the kitchen and me all alone with my mother.

My scolding wasn’t through. The second wave was imminent.

“You can’t speak to him like that, Lorraine. He’s your father, and he’s right. You’re not allowed to have boys in the house, especially when we’re not home.”

“I’m not allowed to have anyone in the house, and you’re never home!” I raised my voice as I heard the soft sound of the office door closing.

“You knew what obligations your father had this weekend,” she said as if it was okay that they missed my birthday for the tenth time in how many years? It was just like her to make this about them like I was an inconvenience to their personal lives and careers.

She wandered around the kitchen and pulled a bottle of wine from the cabinet, popping it open in my face like we weren’t in the middle of an argument.

“It’s been like this since I got sick. You both leave me alone as if you can’t stand to be around me. You can’t catch cancer, mom, it's not viral.” I huffed gently, the frustration rising.

“Lorraine,” she hissed, “you know that has nothing to do with it. Your father is important to this county and to the state. We have obligations to the state and to the governor.”

Yeah, and his big fancy lake house is sixteen hours away.

“I know,” I said instead.

“Then why are you acting like this?” She asked, not wanting a lick of the truth but just wanting an answer that would make her feel better about herself as she downed a glass of wine.

“I’m not acting like anything. Ryan was here to get tutored in English; nothing is going on, and you and Dad are acting like he got me pregnant!” I rolled my eyes, and she slammed the glass to the counter.

What about your father’s reputation?

“What about your father’s reputation?” She said right on cue.

“They barely even know I exist. Tutoring someone from school isn’t going to reflect badly on Dad!” I argued, careful to watch my tone with her.

“It’s not about the tutoring!” She snapped.

“Oh…” I laughed, the sound hollow and frustrated. Like a long sigh. “This is about who he is, his last name.”

“You’re the mayor’s daughter, Lorraine.” My mother said.

“You say that like he’s the king. He's the mayor of some backwater Texas shit hole!” I snapped the anger from her judgments bubbling to the surface alongside the need to defend Ryan with every ounce of energy I had.

“Lorraine Field!” She snapped. “Watch your language.”

“I’m sorry,” I said without meaning a word of it.

“There will be no more tutoring, that boy will no longer be allowed in the house, and I don’t even want to see him on the driveway. Do you understand me?” She lowered her tone as her jaw tightened.

“He needs my help!” I argued.

“He’s turning you into someone I don’t recognize!” My mother snapped, a few pieces of her perfect blonde hair falling from its bun.

“Of course, you don’t recognize me. I’m standing up for myself.”

“Excuse me?” She shook her head. “Go to your room!”

“Yeah, I’m going,” I said, grabbing my little glass figurine and my schoolwork in my arms.

“Don’t come down until you’re ready to apologize!” She added as I got to the kitchen door.

I turned to look at her and found her looking smaller than usual. Like during the argument she had lost all her bite and didn’t seem so scary in my eyes anymore. I smiled, knowing it would piss her off, but I felt free.

“It’s not like you would notice if I did, Mom.” I shrugged and disappeared upstairs before she could get in another word.