Chapter 8

Chapter Eight

Gabe

I ’m torn. Okay, not physically. Man, that would suck. But there’s a physical part of me that needs a break from his dick in my ass. Seriously, I feel raw. Sore. When I wake up Christmas morning, every movement makes me twinge. Not in an entirely bad way, but I know my body—I need a break. There’s never been a time in my life when I’ve bottomed as much as I have in the last twenty-four hours.

But at the same time, I need Edries back inside me. I feel wanted again when he’s deep in my ass. When we’re connected physically. Locked together. Stuck together with dried cum. Yes, that’s been a thing—a very uncomfortable thing, but… I didn’t even hate it.

I feel emotionally raw, too. I didn’t just dump Roux on him last night, but every heartache before him, too. We shared things that felt deep and painful. Frustrating, infuriating, agonizingly painful moments.

Honestly, it was a strange time to do so, but it felt so liberating. Every confession I shared with him was met with understanding, comfort, and dare I say it? Affection. I felt like Edries understood. He cared about what I went through. He asked the right questions and said the right things to make me… feel .

Equally meaningful were the things that Edries shared with me. Like I was important., and he trusted me with his secrets. Trusted that I’d keep them safe and commiserate with him. We might not have shared the same experiences, but that didn’t mean we couldn’t feel each other’s heartache. They continued to compound on each other and yet, those old wounds that I ignored finally started to heal. I think Edries felt the same.

I’m facing a dying fire when I open my eyes. We’d moved away from each other in the night again, but I don’t think it was to get space so much as we were sweating. Especially laying this close to the fire, I’m sure I was burning up like a furnace last night.

I peek over my shoulder to find he’s still fast asleep. After a stretch, I get up and contemplate the fire. I don’t think we should let it go out, despite how hot we get. I’m sure that it won’t take long to get super cold in here if we do. Glancing out the window is proof enough that the storm is still hanging over the mountain. There’s snow halfway up the window now.

We’re literally snowed in. Like the sky opened up just over the cabin and there’s a funnel of snow here alone. I’m not even mad about it.

Carefully, I touch the metal cage around the fire. Is it called a cage? It’s to keep any wafting ash particles inside the fireplace. And any pieces of smoldering wood from rolling out of the hearth onto the floor and setting fire to the cabin.

It’s not hot. It’s warm, yes, but isn’t burning my skin. However, when I try to pull it backward, I find it’s very securely locked in place. I didn’t realize that was a thing. How do you unclasp it?

A hand on my ass makes me jump. Edries smiles, wrapping his arm around me and kissing the side of my head. “Merry Christmas, gorgeous.”

The silly smile that covers my face cannot be hidden. “Merry Christmas, handsome,” I return.

“Let me take care of the fires. Why don’t you throw the blankets we made a mess of last night in the wash so we have something clean to get dirty tonight?”

“I’m so glad I paid for the upgrade of someone maintaining the fires,” I sass as I back away from him.

Edries’s low chuckle makes me grin, sending a shiver of pleasure through my body. “I’m glad I paid for maid service to wash the bedding,” he says.

A stupid smile remains plastered on my face as I wad up the blankets from the floor and head to the washing machine that’s hidden behind a door at the end of the hall. I stuff them all in and then contemplate the sheets. No, they really need to be washed separately. I don’t even remember why, but it’s what my mama taught me, so that’s the way I’m going to do it.

However, once I start the washer, I join Edries in the bedroom and pull the comforter back to tear off the sheets. Fortunately, we find clean ones in the linen closet in the bedroom, so he helps me make the enormous bed before we get into the shower together.

There’s a lot of touching. A lot. His hands never leave my body, our mouths barely break, despite getting dangerously close to drowning in the water falling over us in such a way that it only adds to the difficulty of breathing.

I love his body. Edries isn’t my usual type, but then, I don’t know that I’ve ever cared so much about body shape and size so much as… eyes? Or is it a smile that catches my attention? Either way, I love both on Edries. His eyes are clear and warm, and his smile just warms every part of me.

Not just a heated, sexy warm. But a deeper feeling than that. Something peaceful that lasts longer than sex. Every time I see it, that warmth grows and lingers longer and longer.

When we peel ourselves out of the shower, we dress. I use the term loosely since I only put on socks and underwear. There will never be a time I don’t have something on my feet unless I’m in bed or getting wet. Otherwise, all the fine, gritty debris on the floor drives me absolutely insane. It honestly doesn’t matter how often you clean that shit; it just never goes away and I cannot stand the feeling under my feet.

So, socks. At home, I usually have hard soled slippers too. Call the practice of wearing them girly or for old people all you want. I refuse to feel that shit on my feet!

Edries wears some loose slacks and a tee. I watch him, slightly amused. “Your intent was to be here alone, and you didn’t bring clothes just to lounge in?”

“These are lounging clothes,” he says, sighing heavily. “As I was packing to come here, I realized that all the comfortable clothes I used to own are mysteriously missing. Probably long gone. Bernice always wanted everyone to appear as perfectly poised at every hour, just in case someone dropped in for a random magazine feature.” He rolls his eyes.

I’m about to ask how that fared with the kids, but I’ve gathered enough at this point to know that he compromised everything to give this woman what she wanted. Including how their kids were raised. So I don’t ask. I can see his sadness grow every time we talk about them. There’s no doubt he misses them and the more we reminisce about our childhoods, the more he realizes that he wasn’t able to give his kids the childhood he’d had. The one he’d always wanted for his kids.

I lean into him and press a kiss to his lips, earning myself a smile. “You’re hot in your casual slacks and $80 tee.”

“$80?! Pfft.” He rolls his eyes. “It’s probably $200.”

Stepping back, I give the plain black fabric a dubious look. “Why would you buy a shirt for that—” Edries is already shaking his head and I decide he didn’t buy it.

“You should never have given that woman a debit card,” I insist as I turn for the door. What part of his life was he even allowed to lead on his own?

“I didn’t,” he says. “She had a credit card. Which may have been worse.”

As heartbreaking a realization as Bernice has been, I bet it’s a breath of freedom. Now he can live how he wants to live. Wear what he wants and live how he wants. I know this isn’t how he always imagined his life going, but it must feel liberating. A breath of fresh air.

We concentrate on preparing two small breakfast bakes—one savory and one sweet. I saw both of them online, of course. In one square casserole dish, we add the prepackaged cinnamon rolls and then some cream, more cinnamon mix, and butter. The savory is basically a deconstructed breakfast sandwich, half sausage and half bacon. I prepare the icing for the sweet stuff and set it aside while they bake.

When I’m done, we head into the living room. Edries has me get comfortable in the big chair as he goes to suss out what’s around the tree. He comes back with three stuffed stockings.

I scoot so he gets the hint to join me and we curl up together with our gains in our laps.

“I think this might be proof that we both paid for this room,” Edries says. “I ordered a single stuffed stocking and half a dozen wrapped gifts under the tree. But I think you ordered for two.”

“I did,” I say, glancing at the tree. “There’s something even more exciting about not knowing what we’re opening or what the other person’s opening, you know? It kind of feels like Santa was here.”

Edries kisses my temple. “If he was, he saw your asshole being stuffed.”

I laugh. “And he saw yours like an invitation while you fucked me. You’re lucky he didn’t shove a candy cane up there.”

His grin makes my stomach flutter. “Which ones do you want?”

“Nope,” I say, shaking my head. “I think we just open them all together.”

His smile is much softer now. There’s a magical twinkle in his eyes. “I like that.”

So that’s what we do. We take our time, pulling out one item each and looking at it. Sometimes they’re just little trinkets, like charms or pieces of candy. But sometimes they’re gadgets that we truly have to puzzle together what they are. There are little wooden puzzles, stones, wax melts, and figurines. There’s a true medley of items in the stockings.

We take a lot longer to get through them than necessary, but I think it’s one of the most enjoyable unveilings I’ve ever had.

The buzzer for breakfast goes off and I clamber off the chair while Edries piles our goodies onto the coffee table. By the time he joins me, I have two plates ready and juice on the table.

While we eat, we talk about past Christmases, both from our childhood and our adult years. The one thing that Bernice allowed him to do was spoil his children. And her, of course. When I tried to get out of him what he received for Christmas, Edries was evasive. Enough so that I’m sure he didn’t receive much.

I didn’t know this woman, but I hated her a little more every day. Every time we talked about his kids or their lives together. I really hope that karma has her name and number. Even more so, I hope that someday, Edries hears of how karma served her.

When we’re finished eating and cleaning up, we bring mugs of hot chocolate into the living room. I fish out a few more blankets to sit on in front of the fireplace and tree and together we go through the more than two dozen wrapped gifts.

One of my favorites is a one-piece pajama romper that’s covered in candy cane stripes with an ass flap. I totally plan to wear that later. Edries opens this extravagant designer chess set made with gold and abstract, polished precious stones as pieces. The pawns are little pearly circles. It’s rather stunning.

I open what reminds me of a makeup case. Something like a professional makeup artist might carry around. Except, every drawer and hidden compartment is filled with stupidly expensive chocolates from around the world. I’m almost too afraid to eat them, but we sample a few, anyway.

There’s a jeweled crown and a scented car freshener that looks like it belongs in a museum. Sampler tea tins from around the world. A gold foil flower that is honestly one of the most stunning things I’ve ever seen. There’s this kick-ass pocket watch that looks both old and fantastical, like it’s from a different world. A steampunk world.

I’m not sure if I’m having more fun opening gifts or watching Edries. More times than not, whatever we open, we give to the other. As if the universe just knows that we want to give and make their Christmas magical. Meaningful.

There are a lot of really expensive gifts, but there are fun and whimsical gifts too. When we’re finished and all the discarded paper is sitting in a pile for us to burn later, I look at the items we unwrapped and try to picture fucking Jason here in this moment. Nothing that we opened would be something he’d have liked or appreciated.

Hell, I’m not even sure Roux would have enjoyed some of these things. As I watch Edries in his slacks and $200 tee tend to the fire, I decide that this is truly the most perfect Christmas I’ve ever had. With the perfect man. Everything about today has been… well, magical.

We prepare our small feast together, laughing as we make a mess of the kitchen. Accidentally on purpose brushing and rubbing against each other over and over again. My heart feels full. My cheeks hurt from smiling so much. The twinge in my ass is a constant reminder of last night. And as much as the ache lingers, everything inside me begs for more.

I can’t wait to climb back into bed with Edries tonight. But I enjoy every single moment outside of bed with him, too.

There’s a moment when we’re waiting for everything to finish cooking when I just stare at him. At this man who showed up in the room I paid for like he owned it. He owned everything.

I think maybe he did all along. Including me.