Chapter 21

Chapter 21

Smoke

Over the last two months Serena and I have failed miserably at keeping our relationship platonic. We keep falling into bed together. It was mostly for emotional intimacy at first. When it comes to cuddling, we can’t seem to keep our hands off each other. I’d be lying if I said I only did it to console her or make her feel secure. I like having her in my arms because it reminds me, she’s safe in my keeping. No one will get to her on my watch.

The last couple of months have been particularly rough for Serena. What with her friend being murdered and finding out she had a stalker, I think the stress was getting to her as she lost her appetite and felt nauseous a lot of the time. I tried to make sure she kept eating, so I would cook a tasty meal for us in the evening and ensure the freezer was stocked with her favorite caramel pecan ice cream, in case she felt like eating that instead of regular food. I guess my plan is working because her waistline has firmed up a bit. I like that she’s a little thicker, there’s more to love.

She tries to put up a brave front, but I still find her crying when she thinks no one is looking. Finding out her friend had been brutally murdered has taken a toll on her mental health, but her therapist assures us the tears are all part of the grieving process and are necessary for her to make progress.

Still my sweet love is walking, talking, and working with me at the office now. I consider all that to be progress because for the first week she didn’t want to leave the house. Something about attending her friend’s virtual funeral jogged her back to reality. Maybe it was seeing Gina’s parents grieving and then trying to carry on. I suspect she thought if they could do it, so could she.

She’s still somber much of the time, but both Marge, and Rigs’ son, Evan, make it a point to talk with her a little each day and it keeps her from crawling back into her shell. We have Gordon assigned to guard duty, and during the spring school break, Evan is accompanying him as a ride along. At fifteen he’s still not old enough to get his license, but he wants to be involved in the club and we thought this way he could learn the ropes but keep safe. The poor kid hates riding pillion, but in another six months he can get his learner’s permit. I know Mattie isn’t looking forward to that, but Evan knows his own mind, and has a good head set on his young shoulders.

Marge seems to be taking extra care of Serena, and even brings her food from home for lunch sometimes. Somedays I see them and they’re as thick as thieves, it’s actually quite sweet. In the years Marge has worked for me, she’s always been so private about her personal life, I don’t think she has any kids, so maybe Serena is like the daughter she never had.

Right now, we’re over halfway through Serena’s ninety-day employment contract with our firm, and I cannot imagine her working anywhere else other than with me. Marge obviously adores her, and I wouldn’t want to part with her personally or professionally.

Once Serena and I started being intimate, the sex was so fantastic we ended up having repeat performances every other night. Serena was still shaken up about things and I didn’t want her to feel pressurized, but to my astonishment she seems as eager for my touch as I am to touch her.

Her ex-boyfriend has not resurfaced yet and that worries me. He could literally be anywhere, even in Las Salinas right now. Serena gave us the lowdown on him. Stan graduated at the top of his class at a prestigious Ivy League college and rolled right into a cushy position with a high powered and politically connected law firm in San Francisco. He’s cagy and cunning inside the courtroom, and out. In other words, he’s just the kind of man who will prove to be difficult to catch. I feel like this exponentially increases the danger for Serena. She seems to understand that now, thank fuck.

Today, I have meetings most of the morning and I know Serena has a couple scheduled herself, along with a court appearance at eleven a.m. I’m feeling a bit anxious today, more so than usual, and I can’t get my head around what’s causing it. I shove it aside and prepare for my first appointment with Rex Corp. They’re overhauling their employee benefits plan and want me to review their new policy manual. It is boring, tedious work but it’s what I do.

I’m having a hard time concentrating because Marge is pacing back and forth in the reception area. Come to think of it, she’s been acting strangely over the last few weeks. Her normally snappy personality has been replaced with a jumpy, anxious one. I’m starting to get worried that she regrets our firm taking on a new attorney. It’s clear she’s fond of Serena, but maybe the extra workload is getting to her? Serena is not going anywhere so I’m going to have to sort out Marge on that issue.

I reach over and hit my intercom. “Marge, can you come to my office for a minute?”

I watch her freeze in place and then rush frantically to my door. “Yes. What can I do for you Mr. Drake?”

I gesture to the chairs in front of my desk. “Have a seat, we need to talk.”

She moves slowly toward my desk and lowers herself down into one of the chairs.

I clear my throat and try to find the words to explain that I’m hell bent on Serena staying on as my partner. “Marge, you know how sometimes you end up in a position that turns out to be an exceptionally good fit, but it was only ever supposed to be a temporary position?”

Her bottom lip trembles. “You’re going to fire me. I just knew it. This situation has always been too good to be true.”

I’m surprised she’s saying this, in the years she’s worked for me I’ve never even hinted she’s anything other than a permanent part of the team. Hell, she practically came with the office. “Do you remember how you came to be hired by me?”

Wringing her hands in her lap, she looks like she’s about to cry. “Yes, of course I do, I was working for Mr. Carlos and when he moved to his new premises we parted company. He wanted a more modern office and I’m a bit stuck in my ways. The real estate agent told me another attorney was moving in and they were looking for a secretary, so on the day you moved in I came to introduce myself.”

I remember that day quite well. I had thought it would take me weeks to settle in and set up my office, but suddenly there was this small miracle worker who seemed determined to get my business up and running.

I scratch my head. “I never did understand how I got sent a listing for this office in the first place. It’s a bit like how you just showed up out of the blue when I needed you the most.”

A short silence settles around us and then she adds, “Well that’s what mothers do. They look out for their children, even if they can’t be a part of their lives.”

Her words cause me to forget to breathe. I’m not sure how long I sit there staring at her trying to process what she just said.

Something about her eyes seems like she’s pleading for me to understand, but I’m not sure what I’m supposed to understand.

“You think of me as a son?” I ask. I guess the way she always looks out for me, gets me my morning coffee, and fusses around is almost motherly.

“No,” she says quietly. “Not thinking…”

Slowly it starts to dawn on me, and a whole slew of emotions churn to the surface. Happiness, sadness, anger, grief, and most of all confusion. It’s crazy, my mom died when I was too young to even remember her. But I heard correctly, didn’t I?

She came right out and said she was my mother. Staring into her green eyes, I remember wondering if my mother had looked anything like her—but that had just been foolish daydreams, wondering what would have happened if the woman who’d given birth to me hadn’t tragically died when I was just over one year old. If what she was insinuating was correct, could I have been staring at my own mother the whole time, every single day of the past five years?

My father had destroyed all the pictures of her, he’d told me that he was grief stricken, but if what she’s saying is true, it was likely to cover the fact that she was still alive.

Endless questions rise to the surface, but I’m still sitting there stunned and silent while Marge silently weeps into her handkerchief.

“I’m sorry, Marcus—Mr. Drake—I’ll leave, I should never have done this, it’s just I couldn’t think of any other way to get close to you, I…”

Her voice breaks as the tears fall.

Serena gave me a heads up a couple of weeks ago that Marge had something important to tell me and that I should listen carefully and act accordingly. This must be the thing she was referring to.

Before I know what I’m doing, I come to my feet and go around my desk to sweep her up in a bear hug. There will be time for questions later, it’s still so crazy, but rather than anger that she didn’t tell me sooner, the overwhelming emotion I’m experiencing is joy. I look up to see us reflected in the large mirror on my office wall, the resemblance between us is unmistakable, how could I have ever missed it?

“Do you see it?” I ask in a whisper.

She nods. “I do. I’ve always seen it.”

I put my arm around her shoulders.

Her voice sounds hoarse when she speaks, “Don’t you want to know what happened? Why I wasn’t there for you?”

“No,” I reply. “Maybe one day you can explain, but knowing what a gigantic ass my father was, I’m sure it had something to do with him. It doesn’t matter. The only thing that matters is that you came back to me.”

She turns around, buries her face in my shoulder and sobs. I can tell she’s trying to speak through her tears, but her words come out broken and unintelligible. I rub her back and whisper soothing things to her. Consoling her in this moment feels right.

If I’m being honest, I feel both elated and shocked shitless right now. If it hadn’t been for Serena giving me a heads up that something big was on the event horizon, I would probably be losing my shit about now.

I thought I was alone in the world, but I’m not. I have a mother, a wonderful woman who has chosen to work side by side with me for years to build a business I could be proud of. A business we could both be proud of.

So many conflicting emotions come floating to the surface of my mind. After all the years of wondering what my mother was like, now I know. Finding out it was Marge is shocking but also like discovering my longtime friend and co-worker is so much more. I already have a soft spot in my heart for Marge. Only now it’s bigger and softer than ever.

When her tears slow, I sit her down on the sofa at the far side of my office, pull a tissue from the box on my end table and hand it to her. As she wipes at her eyes, I begin talking. “First of all, I want to tell you what an amazing surprise this is for me.”

“I’m surprised you’re taking me at my word. Don’t you want to see proof?”

“Of course. I want to see whatever proof you have to offer, but I don’t need it in order to believe what you’re telling me. I’ve known you for years and have no reason to suspect you would lie to me about something as important as this.”

“That’s really sweet of you. If you want to fire me, that’s okay, I understand. I know you want your office to be electronic and I’m still keeping all your records on paper.”

“I never thought about firing you,” I explain. “You’ve been so jumpy lately I thought you regretted us bringing on Serena and that maybe the extra workload was getting to you. I was going to tell you that if it’s too much for you to keep up with, you can hire an assistant.”

I can tell by the stunned expression on her face that she wasn’t expecting that.

I grab the tissue box and set it beside her before the waterworks start again. “But I guess now we need to have whole other conversation.”

She wipes at her tears with a new tissue. “I know. A conversation about why I was never part of your life growing up. I wanted to be, you have to believe—”

“We can talk about all that later. What I want to know is if you need anything. What’s your housing like? Do you even like working? You’re my mother. It’s my job to make sure you’re well cared for, that has to come before everything else.”

“Oh, you don’t need to worry about me. I’m just fine. I don’t need you to take care of me. I’ve always managed to get by.”

“You know that your ex-husband was worth a small fortune, right?”

She nods, blinking back tears. “Yes, I knew he came from money. He spent it as fast as he made it though.”

“That inheritance should have gone to you, instead of me. I mean it would have, if the two of you hadn’t divorced.”

This mother of mine seems bewildered by the conversation I’m trying to have with her. “I told you about this because I want us to have a relationship. I want to know my grandkids if you ever have any. And I want us to spend time together during the holidays. I don’t know why you’re bringing up money right now.”

I reach out to touch her hand. “I’m telling you that you’re a wealthy woman. So wealthy, you never need to worry about working another day in your life. Take early retirement if you want, after what that asshole put you through you deserve to be spoilt and pampered.”

She smiles shyly, “Well, I’m not saying it wouldn’t be nice not to have to worry about money but let’s save that conversation for another time.”

“I get that you don’t care about money, but I care about taking care of you. That’s what a good son does, right?”

“The thing that would make me happiest is to be able to continue working with you. I can’t think of anything else I’d rather do with my time.”

I’m so pleased with this latest turn of events. I give her hand a little squeeze. “If you want to continue working here, then that’s fine too, I just wanted you to know, that now you have a choice. But I’ll bet that when the grandkids start coming, you’re going to want to spend all your time playing with them.”

There is a slight pause and then she asks, “Are you trying to tell me something, son?”

“Yeah, I’m trying to tell you that I plan to ask Serena to marry me in the very near future. I want you to dance with me at our wedding and be happy for me.”

Her hands come up to cover her mouth. “I just knew you were smitten with her. I could tell by how you reacted the minute she walked through the door. It’s one of the reasons I was so excited about having her work with us. I hoped that the two of you would fall in love and end up together.”

I smile at her. “I knew you were up to something devious. I just couldn’t figure out what it was.”

She lifts both hands in the air. “I swear I didn’t interfere at all. I just welcomed her into our little firm and let nature take its course.”

“Does Serena know you’re my mom? She gave me a heads up that you wanted to talk to me about something important and I needed to pay close attention to your words.”

“I did talk to her. I was worried that you wouldn’t want me, but she convinced me that you might be open to having me in your life as more than an employee. Don’t be angry with her for keeping it a secret.”

“Don’t worry, I’m not angry at Serena or you. If I’m angry about anything, it’s that my father lied about you being dead. Please tell me that he at least gave you a living stipend.”

“No, and the judge said that we hadn’t been married long enough for me to be awarded alimony. I found work and managed to get by, but it took me some time to get on my feet, and as I lived from paycheck to paycheck, I knew it was pointless going to the courts for custody. No matter what I did, he wouldn’t let me see you. He knew just how to hurt me most.”

The moment she mentioned being my mother, I knew my old man had left her indigent. She was right about him spending his money as fast as he made it. My inheritance had to be liquidated because he’d locked most of his wealth up in rental properties.

We settle down to talk. As my mom launches into long drawn-out story about how she ended up divorced from my father, I pull out my phone and cancel my appointment with Rex Corp via text. I can always reschedule that meeting—while my work is important, my newly found family is more so.