21. Sloane

twenty-one

Sloane

W e jumped from the rendezvous point to the next closest civilized system before Alik sent out a message to the crew's contact at the Intergalactic Alliance. He told them that the crew had secured the human female and downloaded the data from the smuggler's ship.

We've been waiting for two days to hear about what we're supposed to do next and where we're supposed to take Avery, the new human. Most of us don't mind the wait being so long because it means we have time to adjust to the crew changes.

The biggest changes are me now being a permanent human crew member, Jovi and Alik being mated to me, and the human female who has been locked away in Phial's room, sleeping in his nest and refusing to leave or speak to anyone. My mates and I only know about that last point because Essa's been sending us messages to update us since we've refused to leave our bedroom until we've had our fill of each other.

I've offered to talk with Avery since it's been confirmed we both speak the same earth language, but she hasn't wanted anyone near her. I'm not about to force myself into her safe space and make her talk to me when I can't do anything about the devices still attached to her or offer her any kind of mental help other than saying I'll listen if she wants to talk.

When I woke up this morning to a message on my comm tablet from Phial, I knew it was finally time for me to meet Avery. Now I'm standing in front of his room, my hands moist as I try to calm myself down.

I don't know why I'm the one freaking out when nothing bad has happened to me. Maybe it's because I think somehow I'll only make this woman's life worse by being in it. That would really suck. Not because everyone needs to like me but because things have sucked so much for her already. What if I just add to the suckiness?

I steel my nerves, take one more deep breath, and then check the message on the comm tablet once more to make sure I'm not about to walk into Phial wanting to rip me apart with his talons for intruding into his space.

Visit Avery anytime. You need no permission to enter my room. She'll be in the nest, but you only need to knock on it. She can let you in or come out if she chooses. She may only speak with you through the protection of the glass, but that'll be better than nothing, I think. Please visit when you're free. I won't even make jokes.

With one last nod to myself, I slide the door open. I have to blink a few times to take in the scene of the bedroom. I wasn't sure what Phial meant by a nest, but I wasn't expecting a weird frosted glass igloo-looking thing sitting in the middle of his room. It's too short to be considered a real igloo—well, and it's not made of ice. It's more like a large shallow bowl flipped upside down with a small tunnel jutting out from one side, which I assume is how someone gets in and out of it. Even more startling than the nest is the Sytharan lying on top of it and staring at me with sleepy eyes.

Phial yawns and stretches. His talons scrape against the dome's glass as he rolls onto his back and then back into a ball on top of the dome.

"You came," he says with a smile that doesn't quite reach his eyes as his tail wraps down along the side of the dome. "Avery's still in the nest."

Phial crawls toward me on top of the nest until his hand is over the entrance to it and gives it two quick raps with his talons. The sound is loud in the room since everything else is so quiet. Before Avery has a chance to answer, he curls back up on top of the nest and yawns again.

"You sleep in this?" I ask.

"Normally, but now I sleep on top of it," Phial speaks slowly like he's still waking up for the morning. It makes me wonder how poorly he must be sleeping since it's late in the morning according to the time we keep on the ship. "Avery feels safe in it. It's a space just for her. I doubt she'll come out, but I was hoping she'd speak with you."

"You gave up your bed?" I cock a brow at him, wanting to ask more questions. I have no doubt that Phial can be sweet, but he hasn't really shown me or any of the other crew any of it. He's a good friend, but he's also the friend you should never trust with your food.

"You don't question the mother when she tells you to do something," is his answer.

I have to force myself not to laugh. I can see him watching me for my reaction, but he makes no comment about not being serious, even though he's using the same excuse he uses for trying to get away with anything he does, ever.

"You'll need to kneel. She may have all the glass frosted on the inside except for the door."

I want to ask what he means by having the glass frosted on the inside, but I tell myself it's something I can ask him about when I'm not trying to introduce myself to a traumatized woman.

Avery's now part of the crew by default until we know what to do with her, which means I need to make her feel as safe and comfortable here as Essa tried to do for me when I first arrived. Sure, different circumstances and all that, but I can be friendly still. Even if my hands are moist and my brain is telling me how I'm going to make this worse.

I take a step closer to the entrance of the nest and then kneel so I'm small enough to fit through if I'm invited inside. I don't know how the whole nest thing works. I'm assuming it's like her bedroom, so I don't know if she'll want me in there.

Phial motions that I'm in a good spot with a thumb up and then settles his head back against his arms.

The entrance turns a more opaque color, much to my surprise, and on the other side is a woman with dirty blond hair pulled back into a messy bun. Her dark eyes look alive even though the dark circles underneath show how little sleep she's been getting. Her gaze narrows on me, but my eyes are more drawn to the metal encircling her throat and causing my stomach to roll.

I know she was treated horribly by the aliens that took her. I know she's still wearing the implements they used to hurt her since we don't have the technology to get it off her on our ship. I wasn't ready to see it, though.

"Who are you?" Avery asks and then narrows her eyes more. "And I know you all can understand me, but unless you speak the common tongue from Earth, I can't understand you."

"I'm Sloane," I answer with a smile, hoping it's comforting for her that we can speak with one another. "I understand you, and I'm pretty sure you can understand me."

The glass goes cloudy just as a horrified expression crosses Avery's face. I keep a smile on my lips, mainly because I'm confused by the interaction. Also, I want her to know I'm still her friend, even if she needs time to adjust. Plus, the dampness of my hands is now taunting me as I tell myself that I one-hundred percent somehow managed to make things worse.

"I'm sorry," Avery says. Her words sound strangled, like she's trying to force them out without letting me know she's crying. "I can't do this. I can't talk about it. I know that's what you want, but I just can't yet."

Phial rolls his shoulders and then lays his head on his folded arms. He nods his head in reassurance, like hearing Avery cry is something he's used to. With how much he's been around her, I bet he's listened to her sobs too often.

Jovi told me that Phial's been staying cooped up in here to take care of Avery. He's the only male she seems to trust because he doesn't resemble any of the males that hurt her. The main person who hurt her was someone from the same species as Holoth, and he's been punishing himself for even resembling the abuser since she joined the crew.

We haven't attempted to see if she's scared of Jovi or Alik. The risk isn't worth the knowledge of if she can be around them. Right now, she's not ready to be around anyone, and that's okay.

"Hey, I just want to be your friend," I say, hoping she can hear me through the glass.

I place my palm against the entrance, which is still a solid sheet of glass, and let the warmth of my hand warm the cool glass. I try not to think about the wet handprint I'm going to leave when I move.

"I think they put my comm info into the one they gave you, so if you ever want to talk, just send me a message. I'm about to go hang out with the other female, Essa, in the kitchen while we eat. I know it's probably a lot right now, but if you're ever interested, you're more than welcome to join us."

I pause, looking up at Phial before I say the next part. I haven't exactly cleared it with anyone, but since I know everyone on this ship are really good people, I know they'll be fine with it. "If you ever want to come out onto the ship, everyone else can make themselves scarce. We can pretend it's just you and me. Maybe Essa, too, because she'll want to be there if you're okay with it, but yeah. We're here for you, anything you need."

I keep my hand on the glass for another moment, waiting to see if Avery will say anything in response. When she doesn't answer after a few breaths, I stand and offer a last look at Phial. I want to ask him if I did okay, if I just undid all the work he's put into making her feel safe here, or if there's anything else I can do. The words are too thick in my throat, so I end up just looking up at him, begging him silently to tell me this is going to be okay.

"She's strong, she's a fighter, and she'll heal from this," Phial says, not keeping his voice low, as though he wants her to hear the words even if she won't understand them.

"Do you want me to bring you any food?" I ask as I head for the door. Phial shakes his head and returns it to his arms before closing his eyes and ruffling his feathers once. I pat the doorframe as I walk through, feeling like I wasn't very successful in making the other woman feel comfortable.

"Are you staying awake?" I hear Avery ask as I go to slide the door closed.

My eyebrows shoot up high on my head to hear her talk to Phial like she isn't scared at all. Yeah, she's still in the nest. But her voice is louder than it was when she talked with me, and she isn't trying to hide the tears that are falling. Phial taps on the glass once, and I watch as the glass of the dome goes transparent.

I have all of half a second to see the inside of the dome, filled to the brim with blankets, pillows, and dark feathers that look to be the same color as the ones on Phial's head. Sitting in the middle, staring up at Phial with red-rimmed eyes and a flushed face, is Avery.

I stare at the closed bedroom door for a while, trying to decide what to do with this new information. In the end, I walk to the kitchen. I told Essa earlier that I'd meet her when I finished talking with Avery.

I can't help but smile as I watch Essa lean over the food synthesizer and choose something else to make. Her tail lashes back and forth as she works. The counters are filled with ingredients that I won't even pretend to know the name of. Some of them kind of look like flour, others are various liquids, and I'm pretty sure one of them is wiggling about in the bowl like it's synthetically alive.

"Oh, good, you're here," Essa says as she looks over her shoulder. "I've decided you're going to make the new human some cookies. It will make her feel better, I'm sure."

"Essa," I say gently with my hands on my hips as I look at everything she has laid out already.

She turns to face me, her hands wiping against her cargo pants. Her tail moves quicker down by her calves, the tip twitching in agitation. This is the only thing she can think of to help right now, and it's making me realize how helpless she feels in this situation. She treats caring for the females on this ship the same as her actual job as the ship's medic. It makes sense she'd want to do anything she can to help Avery.

I swallow down the emotion that's begging to spill from me and decide we're going to make something inedible, but it'll help my friend feel better. Maybe we'll get lucky, and something will taste somewhat decent.

"You have to try every batch we make." I shoot her a wicked grin, and she lets out a small sigh of relief. Her shoulders slump, but then she's back, flicking through the food synthesizer for more stuff.

"I think I have made all the ingredients you could need," Essa says, looking over at the counter overflowing with different foods. "None of it is what you normally use, but we can figure it out, yes?"

"Yeah." I nod and try to take stock of our options. "We can make something out of this. Worst case scenario, we tell Phial the mother wants him to try them all."

Essa throws her head back and laughs. I smile back at her and start working on what will surely be a massacre of perfectly good ingredients.