Chapter 36

I was terrified to talk to Addie.

There had been so much fury in her voice last night, like she hated me for what I'd done.

I couldn't bear the thought of living forever if my sister hated me.

I sat on Simon's couch, forcing myself not to stare at the glass of blood he'd set in front of me. It was the third one he'd filled for me in less than half an hour, and I felt as famished as I had before the first one. I wished I could drink it slowly, like Simon did next to me. He sipped his like an old-fashioned, lounging back with one leg crossed over the other.

"Simon," I breathed.

"Yes, my darling?"

"What if she doesn't want me anymore?" My voice cracked.

Simon sat up and placed his hand on my knee. "She does."

"You don't know that."

He stopped me before I could leap out of my seat. "Remember I told you how intensely you'll feel things? Anxiety is an emotion too, Lucinda."

I huffed and sank into my seat, rubbing my palms on my thighs. Glaring at him, I asked, "Are you telling me I'm being overdramatic?"

Simon raised an eyebrow. "Yes, I am."

"Rude."

He only chuckled, which made me want to tear out his tongue. I stared at my suitcase, wondering whether Simon or my sister had brought it over. My reservation at the hotel was over, which meant I needed to figure out where to stay.

I hadn't thought about that.

Fuck, I hadn't thought this through at all.

I had to tell my parents I wasn't coming home and I was giving up my nursing career. I had to figure out where to stay and how the hell I was going to get a job.

Would there be a death certificate with my name on it? Did I have to fake my death?

Simon squeezed my hand and brought me back to reality. "You're spiraling, and your sister is here."

I paused and listened, realizing I could hear my sister's determined footsteps as she approached the apartment building. She said something to Holland, and while I could only make out pieces of it, I got the gist. She was furious and thought this whole situation was ridiculous.

My shoulders slumped. Simon kissed my cheek and stood to answer the door as my vampire sister and her vampire boyfriend made it to the top of the stairs. Addie snarled at Simon when she passed him, rushing into the room. I flinched when she yanked me to my feet, gripping my shoulders. Her grip felt too tight, and I resisted the urge to wrench away from her.

"What the hell were you thinking?" She yelled.

"Too loud," I cried, trying to cover my ears.

"You haven't heard loud yet, Indy." Impossibly, her voice grew louder. "What the fuck? How could you get yourself killed like this? Who the hell is this guy, anyway?" She gestured to Simon.

I wanted to curl into myself. I'd never felt like that with Addie before—weak, terrified, ashamed. I hated it.

"Adalyn." Holland crossed the room and placed his hand on Addie's shoulder, a disapproving glare on his face. Addie continued to shoot daggers at me with her eyes, but released my shoulders and stepped back. Holland straightened and turned to Simon, who stood on the other side of Addie, prepared to leap to my defense. "We haven't officially met. I'm Holland, this is my girlfriend, Adalyn."

Simon took Holland's outstretched hand. Before he could say anything, though, Addie barked. "Indy's sister , in case you forgot."

Simon hummed. "I'm Simon, a friend of Lucinda's."

"How much of a friend?" Addie growled.

"Enough!" I cried, pressing my palms to my temples. "Please, it's so fucking loud."

"I suggest we all sit down. Can I get either of you something to drink?" Simon said, his voice low.

"Please," Holland said.

In the same instant, Addie said, "fuck off."

Simon's fingers brushed my shoulder as he walked past me. I leaned into his touch, watching him walk to the kitchen. I couldn't wait anymore and reached for my glass on the table, gulping down the blood. My fangs lengthened; I couldn't stop them.

A moment later, Simon returned, holding a glass out to Holland, who took it politely. He set one in front of Addie, who ignored him. Then, much to my surprise, he sat a fourth one in front of me and took away my empty one without comment.

"Have you stopped feeling like you're starving yet?" Holland asked quietly.

"No," I breathed, staring at the glass full of blood.

"Go ahead, drink it," Simon said when he sat next to me. "Whatever you need, beautiful."

"Beautiful?" Addie growled.

"Please, stop," I spoke up. "You're making this so difficult."

"I'm making this difficult?" Addie snapped. "You're a vampire, Indy. Every part of this will be the most difficult thing you ever have to do. Did you think about that? Do you even know this guy?"

"I know him enough," I mumbled.

"After what? Four fucking days? Five?"

"You're one to talk," I snapped. A tingling feeling spread across my face, and I knew the veins below my eyes had turned black and the definitive red line had surrounded my irises.

"So, you wanted to follow in my footsteps? What the fuck, Indy?"

"Adalyn," Holland tried again.

Addie wasn't finished. "Do you have any idea what you've done? Do you know what this means? Did you stop and think for even a second before asking the first stranger you found to kill you?"

I inclined my chin. "I made this decision with all the information I needed."

"God, Indy." Addie rolled her eyes and buried her face in her hands.

Our roles had never been reversed like this. Addie was always the quiet one, the one who took the yelling but never did it. I yelled. I made sure all eyes were on me—I enjoyed it.

I'd never yelled at her like this, though. I could feel myself shrinking more and more beneath her scrutiny. Some part of me expected her to be angry, but this was different.

"Indy," Holland said. His voice, while cautious, was quieter and much easier to listen to. "Why did you do this?" There was no accusation behind his question, only curiosity.

My bottom lip quivered. "Because I want to spend eternity with my sister."

"Oh," Addie breathed. I was too afraid to look at her for a long moment. When I finally did, red tears were brimming in her eyes. "Indy, I-"

"I don't want to talk about it," I interrupted her. "You've made it clear you don't want me here. I'll get a hotel and, and," I trailed off.

"You're not getting a hotel," Holland and Simon said in unison.

"You'll stay with me," Simon continued.

"The fuck she will." Addie's rage had returned.

I ignored her, turning to Simon. His eyes were soft but full of promise as he reached for my hand. I gave it to him, relaxing as he brushed his thumb over my knuckles. "I'll stay with Simon," I said firmly.

Before Addie could say anything, Holland sat forward. "Tell us how we can help."

I opened and closed my mouth a few times before words came. "I need to call my parents and tell them I'm not coming home, at least not right now. I, uh, I need everything to stop being so loud. And I'm starving, so help in making that go away would be great."

"I'll call Mom and Dad," Addie grumbled.

"Do you have enough blood supply to support a new vampire?" Holland turned to Simon.

Simon paused, then shook his head. "I need to acquire some."

Holland nodded. "I'll get it and bring it back. Can you stay with her?"

"Of course I can."

"Anything else, Indy?" Holland asked.

I shrugged. "I don't know."

"Well, we're a phone call away if you need us. I'll be back in a few hours with blood to sustain you until the initial hunger subsides," Holland said. He took a deep breath. "We have questions, and we're not exactly happy about how this happened, but you're one of us now. You have a place here, with us, if you want."

Tears welled in my eyes. I touched one as it leaked down my cheek, pulling my fingers away red. I stared at my fingers for a while, my heart beating in my throat.

I was a vampire.

I got what I wanted.

And yet, everything was wrong. This wasn't how it was supposed to go.