Chapter 9

CHAPTER 9

Jane

M y feet were cold. I could feel stone beneath them and a chill that began in the soles and moved up my legs to the rest of me. My eyes were closed or I was in a dark place. I wasn't sure which. I felt like I was going to shiver, but I couldn't move. This place was disorienting. It wasn't my room off the warlord's chamber. I was somewhere else. All I knew was that I didn't want to be here. I shouldn't be here.

My breath was constricted, as if something tight was squeezing my ribs. I wanted to call out for Siroc, but I could barely breathe, let alone talk.

Siku .

The gravelly male voice was like a jolt. It was familiar, dark, persuasive, insistent. Everything in my being leaned towards it and recoiled at the same time, leaving me in a horrible state of conflict and confusion.

Who was this? I knew the voice, but I didn't know who it was.

Siku .

Was he calling me that or telling me his name? A thin whimper squeezed out of my lips.

Y ou will listen to me.

The voice, and its familiar tone, was like a parasite chewing through my mind. No! my thoughts screamed. There was something seductive about this entity speaking to me, but it was in direct conflict with my true thoughts.

There was a raspy chuckling sound. You are ours, Siku. This was just a test. You will know when we have a task for you. And you will obey.

I was resisting, trying to pull away with all my strength. But, even using every bit of power in this enhanced body, I could not pull away. I could not move one bit to break the spell of this creature.

Unwelcome memories dripped into my thoughts like a slowly leaking faucet. I remembered fear, pain, a small white room with barely any light. I remembered the sickening feeling of a door opening and being taken by shrouded figures. I remembered begging— No, no. Not again. No more.

But there was always more.

The creature speaking to me now had held my existence in his hands. Using all of my determination, I gathered my strength and expelled it in one great push. I wrenched myself free and it felt like I'd dislodged myself from a block of ice. I went tumbling onto the hard stone floor.

My heart pounded fast. My skin was slick with sweat and my limbs trembled. I blinked, realizing that my eyes were open, but there was nothing to see here. It was a simple, dim corridor, not as refined as the rest of the Thrail's halls. The stone passageway was rough cut, barely lit with auxiliary lights.

How did I get here? How would I get back? Pain throbbed behind my temples. As I tried to stagger to my feet, a hand closed around my upper arm. I knew it was him. I knew it before he even said my name.

"Jane." I could hear the panic threading through his deep voice, but his touch felt like fire against me and I jerked away, gasping with pain.

"No." I held out a shaking hand, shuffling away from his hulking form. "Stay back."

"It's me," he said. "Siroc." He reached for me again, both hands extended, and my body rebelled against the incoming touch.

I lunged forward and my hands met his chest in a hard push. I shouldn't have even budged him, yet he flew back several feet, staggering, but remaining upright. I could feel surprise coming off him. The glint of his spear tip caught the very faint light of the corridor.

"Jane." His voice was hard now. "Stop it. I'm not going to hurt you."

"My skin," I gasped. "It hurts like fire."

He made a growling noise in his throat and pulled off his fur cloak. It made sense that he would wear one here. It was freezing cold. "Come here."

I shuffled toward him, using the very last of my dwindling strength. The sweat that had poured off of me chilled, making me feel covered in frost. The thick, heavy fur closed around me, encasing me in warmth and the heady scent that I only associated with him. Siroc. Safety .

My knees gave out. My joints melted, and I started to sink to the floor. Thick, strong arms caught me, lifted me, wrapped in the fur. He held me against his chest, holding his spear out in front of us like a barrier.

His face came down to mine. His lips brushed my skin and he spoke into my scalp where my headache throbbed. "You are safe now. I've got you."

The sound of his voice replaced the echo of the dark being that had held control over me. The pain slipped away from my skin. The weight that had crushed my temples began to ease, and I let out a gurgling cry as I turned to him, pressing my face into his chest. I breathed in that wonderful, intensely male scent. "You," I whimpered. "Safe with you."

Firm lips brushed my temple, my forehead, my cheek. "Yes. You are always safe with me."

I felt the tears coming, welling up, taking the place of the fear that had infused my entire being. My fists curled tightly into his soft tunic. He had been sleeping. This was one of his night shirts.

"I'm taking you home," he said.

"No." I seized in fear. "Don't send me back to Earth." I couldn't blame him if he did.

"Not back to Earth," he said calmly. "Back to our room."

I relaxed again, pressing my face to his chest and closing my eyes. "Thank you. I—I…you are—"

"Shh," he murmured, cutting off my incoherent stammer. "Just relax now."

I could feel him walking. He said some quiet words to another male, then there was only the steady rhythm of his steps through the corridors. Before long, there was more light and the air was warm. It did not smell of metal and ice, but of the familiar scents of the Thrail.

A door shut behind us and he stopped walking. I knew we were back in his quarters and I blinked my eyes open to take in the familiar, wonderful surroundings.

I was getting myself together. Although still weak and shaking, I had control over my body again. "Thank you," I said in a clearer voice. "You can put me down, now."

"I will," he said, walking over to his bed. He placed me gently onto it, fur cloak and all, and stood there looming over me. "Can I get you some food? Something to drink, maybe?"

I shook my head. "No." I sat up with the pillows behind my back and drew my legs up to my chest. I wrapped my arms around them and rested my forehead on my knees. "I don't know what happened. I know you're going to ask, but I don't know."

He moved to the other side of the bed and reclined on it as if we were having a perfectly normal conversation.

The front of his tunic gaped open, revealing his thickly muscled, dark red chest. His horns were sharp and huge in the dim light. "What is the last thing you remember? Let's start there."

I peeked over at him. "Going to bed." I shrugged. "I put on my nightgown," which I glanced down at. I was still wearing it. "I went to the bathroom. Brushed my teeth and washed my face. I got under the covers and fell asleep."

"And then what happened?"

"I was in that corridor, or wherever it was. It was so cold there."

"Yes. You were just inside a lesser exit to the outside. The cold comes through, especially at night. It happens to be the corridor you were abducted from."

I paused to take that in. "There must be some significance to that."

He nodded. "I am having that whole corridor sealed off in the morning. Neither you nor anyone else will pass that way."

"And there was a voice."

His gaze sharpened. "What voice?"

"It was male and-and…it was the most terrifying thing I've ever heard. I think I was previously trained to obey him, because while I hated him, I also felt desperate to please him." I felt nauseous just saying the words. There was a humiliation to knowing I'd been subjugated by this creature. That my will had been stripped away. "I think it was the voice of the being who had me when I was gone. I didn't see anyone, though. I was alone in there. He called me by a name—Siku. I don't know. I think that's what they called me in the white place."

"Tell me about the white place," he prompted.

I told him what I remembered. What had come back to me during the experience I just had. I told him about the hooded figures, of the panic, the pain, and the desolate hopelessness I felt. They were like snapshots in my mind, not full narratives—just something like an old photograph found under a couch.

"He told me I would obey him." I shivered and pulled the fur cloak tighter around me. "And I fought. I fought with all I had in me, and I still couldn't break free. I couldn't move." I winced and closed my eyes. "I could barely breathe."

His expression was dark. His muscles tense. He looked every inch a dark, demon lord with the furious expression on his face. "Whoever or whatever this is, I will find him and I will destroy him. For every shred of fear and pain he caused you, I will give it back to him tenfold." His eyes were like black fire. "I promise you this."

My chest felt as if shackles had been lifted from it. My heart squeezed, and without thinking, I launched myself across the bed and into his arms. The cloak was left behind. His arms came around me, and without thinking it through, I kissed him.

I could sense his surprise. The jolt in his body was unmissable. My lips met his in a chaotic crush of need and attraction that had been kept in the dark for too long. His mouth was firm and after his shock subsided, his lips slanted hungrily over mine. Our bodies curved toward one another's. Tongues met in a frenzied dance of discovery. A little voice in my head couldn't believe this was happening. That I'd started this. That he was continuing it. A deep groan rumbled from his chest. It vibrated through me, waking up my body, making me ache. I didn't have a plan. I just wanted this .

"Jane." He pulled his mouth from mine. "Enough."

I pulled in a shuddering gasp. "I'm sorry." My fingers moved over my short hair. "I'm so sorry, Siroc."

"It's okay. It's… Sweet Skrah , you will be my undoing." He held me tight against him, breathing heavily. His body was tight and hot with desire. He rolled slightly, so he lay on his back and I sprawled across his chest.

"I don't want to be alone," I whispered. "I shouldn't have kissed you, but please don't send me away."

"I won't." Those lips pressed against the top of my head.

His wide, hard body cradled my soft curves. There was only my thin nightgown and his thin shirt between our bodies, and I was suddenly acutely aware of that.

A thin, sharp stab of warning broke through my thoughts. This was inappropriate. I had crossed a line that had been established when I first moved in here, when he had almost kissed me. He made it clear then that nothing would happen between us. That we would not touch.

And here I was, throwing myself at him.

I stiffened and tried to get away, mumbling apologies, but his arms tightened around me.

"Hush, Jane." Wide hands moved in gentle circles over my back, massaging the tense muscles there. "Rest now. Go to sleep. You're safe."

Ah. Of course. He was offering comfort. Safety . Surely he felt nothing more than that. A tear leaked from my eyes and wetted his shirt beneath my cheek. Those wide, strong fingers continued to massage my back, releasing the tension from each muscle, one by one. My eyes drifted closed. "I can never repay you," I murmured in a slur as sleepiness took over. "You're so kind."

"I am not kind," he said gruffly. "But I am yours."

But I must've misheard that last part as sleep dragged me down into its dark, warm waters and pulled me under. Surely, he'd said something else. I was far too broken to win the heart of a warlord.