Chapter 18

18

Dakota

T he buzzing of a neon light prompts me back into the real world.

My mouth feels like it's been stuffed with dry cotton balls.

There's a nagging sting in my right hand. I glance down and see an IV line. Suddenly, the discomfort grows as I realize there's a needle attached to that IV, and it's in my vein. What the hell happened?

There's a steady beeping coming out of a device next to my bed. My vitals bounce on the black screen with calm, even green lights. At least I'm alive. I'm pretty sure I can get out of bed, but I don't want to risk it. The last thing I remember is passing out in front of Callie and Archer…

Oh, God.

"Fucking hell," I hear myself say.

I follow that up with a frustrated groan as I realize the repercussions of everything that came out of Callie's spiteful mouth. She's not going to stop there, either. She will do everything in her power to keep me from getting my inheritance, which is beyond infuriating, yet I can't exactly blame her for wanting to try. I'm a stranger who barged in and took one of the most important things in her life—money.

The door opens, and a nurse walks in.

"Ah, you're awake," she says. "Welcome back, Dakota. I'm Jackie. I'm a nurse here at Cedar Crest."

"What the hell am I doing here?"

It's a private hospital. My insurance definitely can't cover the cost.

"You need to stay calm, Dakota. You had quite the fainting spell," Jackie says as she checks my vitals on the machines, then proceeds to make sure my IV line is working properly.

"How did I end up here?"

"Mr. Faulkner insisted that the paramedics bring you to Cedar Crest," she replies. "He is so worried about you. His brothers, too. They're in the waiting room as we speak."

"Oh, God, all three," I gasp. "What about my sister?"

"Is that the mouthy redhead?"

"Yes."

"Yeah, she's out there, too." I can tell by her tone that she's already not a fan.

"I haven't been eating that much lately, and I'm under a lot of stress. That must be why I passed out," I say more to myself than Jackie.

"That could be part of it for sure. You need to take better care of yourself while you're pregnant."

"Wait, what ?"

The whole world comes to a sudden halt. My brain freezes. Not one thought is able to pass through any of my synapses as I stare at Jackie with sheer disbelief. She smiles softly as she goes over my chart again, nodding to confirm.

"Ah, so you didn't know. We took blood. You're pregnant, Dakota."

"Fuck," I blurt out.

"I take it you weren't planning it," Jackie concludes.

I shake my head slowly. "Does anybody else know?" One of the triplets is the father. We hadn't paid attention to any sort of protection, obviously. We'd been too busy having fun, losing ourselves in the moment, and making the most of every night.

"No," she says. "It's doctor-patient privilege at this point. You had to be informed first."

"Can we keep it that way?"

"Of course."

"Thank you."

She analyzes my reaction carefully. Surely, I'm not the first expectant mother who would rather not be expecting. This just adds to an already existing and overwhelming amount of guilt over everything else. I've been keeping secrets from the Faulkner brothers already—the foreclosure, the inheritance. And now this. There's no way I can talk to them about this, not now. Not with Christmas approaching so quickly and Archer aware of the inheritance.

"Is this your first child?" Jackie asks.

I shake my head. "No, I have a five-year-old daughter."

"And how was that pregnancy?"

I fondly remember those months. They were the happiest of my life despite the growing discomfort. My Maisie was growing inside of me, listening to the muffled sound of my voice as I went about my day, trying to be a good wife to a man who was already inching one foot closer to the door. At the time, I had no idea life was going to throw a monkey wrench at me. I was just happy and eager to be a mom.

"Uneventful for the most part. Heartburn, but nothing that couldn't be fixed with a gallon of mint tea," I say, sighing deeply. "The birth was okay, too. No complications. The epidural took a tad longer to wear off, but that was about it."

"That's good to know," Jackie replies. "Your blood tests look good. We're waiting on another panel that should be ready by tomorrow, but my guess is you're going to have some low values on several essential minerals, so I'll need you to revisit your diet and get as many fruits and veggies in as you can. The doctor will also be prescribing a set of prenatal vitamins for you to take, starting today, so we can be sure you're getting all the nutrients needed for a safe pregnancy."

"Okay."

"Your HCG levels are good and there was no bleeding, nothing to cause concern. The doctor will be in shortly to give you an ultrasound and see how it's looking in there, okay?"

"Thank you, Jackie."

"You're most welcome, Dakota. I know that this can be a scary and confusing time, no matter how many kids you've already had. What do you want me to do about the Faulkner gentlemen and your sister?"

I give her a pleading look, my cheeks burning with shame. "Can you just… send them away? Tell them I'm okay, but I just need to rest."

"Absolutely. Your health is our number-one priority."

She nods once and promises to come back in an hour to check up on me, then leaves a few healthy snacks and a bottle of freshly squeezed orange juice on the tray table next to my bed, insisting that I eat all of it before she comes back.

I can't get the image out of my head. It's been an hour since I watched that little nugget of life forming in my womb. The ultrasound came out well. The baby and I are fine. I just need to make sure we stay fine until my due date. Early summer, the doctor said.

I'm happy but also terrified.

Pride and fear have kept me from doing and saying important things.

It needs to stop.

Chelsea was right all along. I have been putting myself last, and it's taking a toll on everything else. My phone buzzes. She's on her way. Archer called her, but she couldn't get over here until now since she had a house full of kiddos, my daughter included.

The door opens, and I'm about to tell Nurse Jackie that I don't think I have room left for dinner tonight, but it's Archer. Behind him, Reed and Maddox wait quietly and patiently.

"Hey, you," Archer says. "Sorry to barge in."

"It's okay," I exhale sharply. "I'm just starting to get my senses back. Thank you for bringing me here and for taking such good care of me, though I'm never going to be able to repay you."

Reed pushes past Archer and comes to take me in his arms gingerly. "You scared us."

Tears threaten to escape from my eyes as I melt into his embrace. I find warmth and reassurance in this man, but beneath it is a quiet layer of anger and dismay. I can almost feel it, and I can't blame him. I've made a mess of things. All Callie did was shine a light on it.

"I'm okay, I promise," I reply as Reed kisses me, and then takes a step back.

Archer comes over next, gently caressing my face. "What happened? The doctor wouldn't tell us anything. And the nurse was even stingier with the intel."

"I'm okay," I say it again. "Just really low blood sugar and some stress. Callie just exacerbated it."

"We sent her away," Maddox chimes in, moving to the other side of my bed. He takes a seat in one of the guest chairs, pulling it close enough so he can hold my hand and kiss it over and over. Each peck fills my heart with a golden light that makes me feel blessed for every moment that I get to spend with these men. "She knows not to bother you again."

"She did stick around for a little while, though," Archer adds. "I think she felt responsible in a way."

"It's good to know she's not entirely evil," I mutter.

"Callie is a petulant and hurt little girl," Reed replies, shaking his head. "I've met so many like her, and they all follow the same pattern. Raised with a silver spoon in their mouth but never loved enough, they take it out on people they perceive as rivals. And given the whole inheritance thing, I can certainly see why she'd have it out for you."

"I am so sorry I didn't tell you," I manage, my voice wavering under the pressure.

"Yeah, she kept droning on about it in the waiting room until Maddox told her to shut the fuck up," Archer chuckles softly. "Dakota, we need to hear it from you. Is it true? You're not going to get your inheritance unless you're married by Christmas this year?"

"It sounds ridiculous, doesn't it? Like something out of a soap opera," I scoff. "But it's true. That's why they wanted me at the funeral. My grandmother left behind an amended last will and testament. She included me in it with those specific conditions."

"Why didn't you tell us? We knew something was up." Maddox replies.

I sigh and try to choose my words carefully. "Because I didn't want you to think that I might expect any of you to do something about it. I swore I'd only marry again for love. If I ever marry again, that is."

"Yet you led Callie to believe we were engaged," Archer shoots back. "What I don't appreciate is that you haven't been entirely honest with us. We asked you more than once about Chappaqua."

Anger tests me. Anger masking shame, to be specific. It brings out a side of me that I don't like, but I can't control it, either. It's my defense mechanism, and I'm starting to feel like a cornered animal. I'm trying to be understanding of their position. The Faulkner brothers were slighted. I did, in fact, keep a secret from them. And when they asked about it, I lied.

"Listen, this is my cross to bear, my issue to resolve," I say with a sharp tone. "It's not yours, nor am I asking you to make it yours, okay? I know I lied to Callie, but I was just trying to get her to shut up."

"Dakota, that's not what we're talking about here," Reed says, trying to reason with me. "Whatever problems you're dealing with, we can work on them together. We're not just here for the bedroom fun. I thought we were going somewhere with all of this."

"Where, exactly?" I snap. "There's three of you and one of me. I've got a child and an ex-husband who texts me every once in a while, hoping I might just be dumb enough to let him back into our lives. The minute our… relationship comes out, Keith could try to use it as leverage for a custody case. Have any of you thought about the risks involved?"

Silence falls over the room. Slowly, Maddox lets go of my hand and leans back in his chair. His eyes never leave mine, but I can see the tension gathering in his broad shoulders. Reed clears his throat and takes a couple of steps back as well. Archer, however, doesn't budge.

"I'm sorry, but it's the truth," I add.

"We've never really addressed this," Reed mutters. "We just went with it without thinking ahead. We don't have a clear destination yet."

"What possible destination is there?" I reply. "The world will never understand us or the relationship we have. And I can't risk losing my daughter over it."

Archer gives me a hard look. "We've all been more than discreet about it."

"For now."

"What's that supposed to mean?" he asks.

"Do you actually believe Callie is done tormenting me?"

"Clearly, there's a lot we need to talk about here," Reed interjects, trying to keep everything at a rational and reasonable level. "Why don't we just let you rest for the night? Think about everything, and we'll be back first thing in the morning so we can talk about it. Clear heads, coffee, bagels, and I'm sure we'll be able to figure something out."

"You didn't tell us about the foreclosure on your home, either," Maddox interjects. "We've been honest about everything with you, Dakota."

"You know what? Reed's right," I shoot back. "I could use some alone time. Again, thank you for bringing me here. Thank you for waiting around, for worrying about me, for coming in to check on me. As you can see, I'm good. They're only keeping me here until morning for observation, and then I can go home."

Archer frowns. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means I would like to be alone, please." My voice stiffens as I cross my arms, careful not to hit the IV line.

"You're not just going to sit here and sulk."

"It's precisely what I'm going to do because I'm a free woman."

"Dakota—"

"We're done for now. Thank you."

Maddox curses under his breath as he gets up and leaves. Reed gives me one last look and a gentle squeeze of the shoulder before joining his brother outside. Archer, however, is more stubborn than both his brothers combined.

"You're a piece of work," he says.

"I'm sorry. It's just too much to deal with right now," I reply.

"Fine, but I'm not letting you push us away, Dakota. I'm going to leave now, but I'll be back in the morning, bright and early, long before you think of slipping out of here before I catch you."

He leans in and captures my mouth in a long and profound kiss. It reaches somewhere deep inside of me, pumping vibrant energy through my heart and radiant heat through my limbs. I lose my breath as I kiss him back, wishing I could tell him everything about how I feel, about how terrified I am of losing this wonderful thing between us. But I am scared.

"You're not alone anymore," he says, then walks out.

As the door closes behind him, I finally let it all out. Tears stream down my cheeks, and I shudder, unraveling and crying my heart out. It's been a long time since I have felt so lost and confused. I need a way out. I need a light to show me the way because everything around me has gotten so dark that I no longer know where I am.

For a long time, I was on my own. Even when I was married to Keith, I was still more or less on my own, providing for my family. Working at bars. Keeping the house clean. Cooking. Raising our daughter. When Keith left, part of me felt relief. One less mouth to feed. Fewer clothes to wash and iron. Fewer dishes. It made me feel guilty to admit that I was better off without him.

Now, I've gotten myself caught up in an unconventional relationship after being single and used to it. The Faulkner triplets have been incredibly patient, but I fear I've reached the end of that line. I need to do better by them, too, not just for myself. I need to learn to open up more, to let them take care of me. They've already expressed their intentions on the matter.

They have no desire to let me go.