18. Zara

18

ZARA

A sense of relief pours over me for sharing part of my past with Dimitri.

I didn’t want to tell him the whole truth. That the man he had just stopped from assaulting me had already done far worse.

Dimitri would have killed Giovanni without a second thought, and I don’t want any more blood to stain Dimitri’s hands at my expense.

But I wanted to at least offer him an explanation for why I keep being so hot and cold with his advances, and the support he’s shown me has my heart swelling.

So now, as I lean back against my pillows, I feel not even an ounce of fear as Dimitri settles himself on my right side, moving his left arm beneath my neck so that I can nuzzle into the swell of his bicep.

His right hand moves to grip my waist as he bends down to kiss me, his tongue sliding into my mouth as he pulls me closer.

I moan at the taste of him, and he grins against my lips .

“I’m more than happy to just make out like horny teenagers.”

I laugh, shaking my head as he grins down at me.

When he smiles like that and his eyes light up with mischief, it takes my breath away. Add to the fact that he’s got the kindest heart of any man I’ve ever known, and he’s truly the whole package.

“I think I’m okay with doing a little more than that.” I reach up to cup his face as I kiss him deeply.

Now it’s Dimitri’s turn to moan as I trace his lower lip with my tongue.

“Can I touch you, Zara?” His voice is rough with need.

I nod, and he smiles as his hand moves beneath the fabric of my shirt to rest on my stomach. I shiver at the feeling of his warm fingers caressing my skin.

“We can stop at any point, okay?”

“Okay,” I whisper, relaxing back into the pillows.

Dimitri bends down to press a kiss to my jaw and then my neck as his fingers begin to move lower, dipping beneath the waistband of my pants.

My breath catches as his fingers gently caress my bare pussy.

I arch my hips, desperate for him to move lower, but I know Dimitri is worried about pushing me. I’m grateful that he’s being so sensitive toward my feelings, but I can’t deny that having him take his time is fucking torture.

Nestling against his warm, hard body has me throbbing between my thighs as he sucks on the sensitive skin of my neck.

Knowing the sort of pleasure that Dimitri can make me experience has my body pulsing with need.

“Please.” I cling to his arm as I try to adjust my hips so that he brushes against my clit .

“Easy, Zara,” he growls, splaying his hand on my lower stomach to push me back down onto the bed.

I groan, turning toward him and crashing my mouth against his.

As soon as I part my lips, Dimitri’s fingers dip between my thighs, and he groans as he feels how wet and ready I am.

“Fuck.” He runs two fingers along my core before gently grazing over my clit. “You’re drenched baby.”

I moan, my head falling back as my eyes flutter closed.

“Mmm…” My chest heaves as Dimitri circles my entrance with his index finger, coating the digit in my arousal before dragging it up to my clit and rubbing it hard.

“Oh!” I cry out, arching off the bed as a rush of pleasure shoots through my body.

My nipples are hard and aching, and I moan even louder as they brush against the soft material of my top.

“Have you come like this before?” he murmurs against my neck.

“No,” I gasp as he sinks one finger inside my pussy all the way to the knuckle.

“Not even by yourself?” He pumps his finger inside me so slowly that I writhe against him, desperate for more.

“N-not in a l-long time.”

“You’re safe with me, Zara.”

I screw my eyes shut to stop myself from bursting into tears at his sweet words.

Dimitri peppers kisses along my jaw as his thumb starts working my clit in lazy circles. “It’s going to feel so good.”

“Dimitri.”

“I’m right here with you, sladkaya .” He pulls his finger out before adding another .

I gasp as he stretches me, and my cheeks heat as a rush of warmth spreads between my thighs.

“It’s okay, zhizn’ moya . It means you’re getting close.”

I grind against his hand, accidentally brushing my hip against his cock.

Dimitri hisses, and I glance down to take in the sight of his erection straining against his pants.

“Fuck, I can feel your pussy clenching,” he groans.

I moan. “I’m remembering what it’s like to have you buried inside me.”

“ Zara ,” Dimitri growls.

“Felt so good .”

Dimitri pumps his fingers inside me harder, increasing his pace as he rubs my swollen clit with his thumb. When he finally curls his fingers inside me, brushing against my sensitive inner walls, my legs start to shake as my release builds.

“I’ve got you,” he soothes as my back arches off the bed. “You can let go, sladkaya .”

“Dimitri!” I cry out as my orgasm hits.

I cling to him as my entire body trembles with the force of my pleasure, my pussy clenching so hard around his fingers that I’m half crying, half moaning as a rush of wetness pools between my thighs.

“Well done, Zara, keep going.”

I dig my nails into his arm, my hips grinding against his hand as he continues to pump his fingers in and out of me, his thumb still gently rubbing at my swollen clit.

My breath comes in quick pants, and sweat starts to bead on my forehead as I ride out my orgasm.

When I’m finally spent, I collapse against the pillows, gasping for breath as Dimitri kisses along my neck.

“You did so well, sladkaya . ”

“That was amazing.”

“We can do that all night if that’s what you want.”

“Mmm…” I turn onto my side to look up at Dimitri.

His eyes are heavy with desire, and I move my hand to the waistband of his pants to show him that I’m more than happy to do this all night too.

But Dimitri grips my wrist, halting my movements.

“Tonight is all about you.” He moves my hand back to rest on my stomach. “So, I’m going to keep making you come until you’re so exhausted that you fall into a dreamless sleep.”

I whimper at the thought.

He flashes me a wicked grin as he gently pushes me onto my back and moves to straddle his thighs on either side of me.

I watch eagerly as he makes quick work of the buttons on my top. As soon as the material falls open, and he takes in my peaked nipples, he grunts. “Your breasts are incredible.”

I glance down at my swollen breasts, so heavy and aching, and smile shyly.

Dimitri flashes me a grin before dipping down and taking my right nipple into his mouth.

I gasp as he flicks his tongue over the sensitive bud.

“I could explore these all fucking night,” he growls.

“I-I’m okay w-with that.” I’m panting so hard with need that I can barely think as Dimitri begins kneading my other breast.

I arch my back, my fingers moving to his hair to pull him harder against me as he sucks my nipple.

He groans as I grip his hair tighter.

My eyes roll at the sound. I’m already throbbing once more between my thighs, and I whimper as my pussy clenches, so desperate to be filled.

“Dimitri,” I moan.

With one last kiss to each nipple, he lifts up and sits himself back on his heels as he reaches for my pants. “These need to come off.”

I bite my lip, watching as he starts to pull them down my thighs.

I shift beneath him, lifting my ankles so that he can remove them, and then his hands find my knees, pushing them apart as he lowers his mouth to my pussy.

It’s even better than I remember.

I bow off the bed at the first lick along my core, and when his tongue finds my clit my entire body goes limp with pleasure. I collapse back against the pillows, moaning as Dimitri’s hands reach up to cup my breast as he continues to lap at my arousal.

I don’t think I’ve ever been so wet, and the thought would normally make me self-conscious. But the deep grunts of approval that Dimitri is making have me tilting my hips to give him better access.

“Fuck, Zara.” He lifts his head to look down at my glistening pussy.

I push up onto my elbows so that I can watch him.

His dark eyes flick up to mine, and I whimper at the sight of him looking up at me from between my thighs.

He smirks.

“Do you like watching me devour your pussy?” His voice is so hoarse with arousal that I clench my thighs around his head.

He chuckles before sinking his tongue deep inside me.

“Yes!” I cry out, my head rolling back as he slowly starts to fuck me with his tongue .

“Eyes on me, Zara.”

He runs his tongue along my core and flicks my clit.

“Ah!” My head falls forward as my eyes fly open.

Dimitri winks before wrapping his lips around my clit and sucking hard. My mouth opens in a silent gasp as my release starts to build once more.

I sink my fingers into his hair, our eyes locked as I grind against his face.

The slight stubble on his cheeks rubs against the inside of my thigh which only makes me moan louder. It feels so good, and I can’t get enough.

“Come for me, Zara,” he growls.

I lean back on one elbow, my free hand moving to knead my breast as Dimitri starts working my clit harder.

I’m so fucking close my body is almost vibrating with pleasure. And watching Dimitri as he licks at my pussy makes my blood feel as if it’s boiling in my veins.

I've never felt pleasure like this before. Tears start to prick my eyes as my legs start to tremble.

“Fuck, yes, Zara, that’s it,” Dimitri grunts.

“I-I’m coming?—”

My breath catches as my orgasm hits.

I reach for Dimitri, sinking my fingers into his hair and holding him against me as my body shudders with pleasure.

He moans against me, his tongue gently licking my swollen pussy until I collapse once more.

“I don’t think I have another one in me.”

Dimitri’s body shakes with silent laughter as he presses a kiss to my inner thigh.

“Then I think it’s time for bed.” He crawls up my limp body until he’s hovering over me. “Sleep well, sladkaya zhizn’ ,” he whispers before kissing me softly.

I wake to the sun warming my face. I stretch out my limbs, sighing at the silk sheets against my naked flesh. But when my hands don’t brush against a hard male body, I freeze.

My eyes fly open, and I’m surprised to find I’m alone.

I ignore my disappointment that Dimitri left, but I remind myself that he’s a busy man. He can’t spend all day lounging in bed with me when he already spent most of last night doing just that.

My cheeks heat at the memory of last night. It was even more incredible than our wedding night, and we didn’t even have sex.

He worshiped my body in a way I’ve never experienced, and my added level of trust in him made me fully give in to the pleasure.

Pressing my hand to my heart, I stare out the window at the city.

I knew I was starting to develop feelings for Dimitri, but last night truly uncovered how hard I’m falling.

He made me feel so comfortable and safe not only when sharing intimate details of my life, but also when sharing my body with him.

The fact that he didn’t get off once last night shows me how truly selfless he is. I never would have expected him to act in such a way when I first met him.

Perhaps the playboy persona is truly an act after all.

I lie back against the pillows, reliving the memories of last night until my stomach growls. I chuckle at the rude interruption.

Can I not simply spend my day fantasizing about the man I selfishly get to call my husband ?

My stomach’s answering growl has me throwing back the covers and going in search of some clothes.

I throw on a pair of leggings and a tank before heading downstairs.

I glance around eagerly, in the hopes of finding Dimitri lounging on the couch, but I’m only left disappointed. The only sign that he’s been here is the empty espresso cup by the coffee machine.

Maybe it’s my turn to start hounding him to eat.

After turning on the coffee machine and getting a fresh pot brewing, I shuffle over to the fridge. I pull out a container of eggs along with some veggies and cooked chicken, deciding on more of a brunch option seeing as it’s almost noon.

As I chop up some bell pepper and get to work whisking a few eggs, my stomach churns.

I pause, setting down the bowl and staring at the food laid out on the counter.

My hand goes to my mouth as I wretch. “Oh no.”

I turn and bolt for the sink, leaning over the edge and emptying the contents of my stomach.

I groan as my mouth fills with saliva and acid burns my throat. Sweat is starting to bead along my forehead and the back of my neck, so I turn on the faucet and splash some cold water on my face as I breathe out slowly.

“No breakfast for me, then,” I mutter as I grip the edge of the sink.

I don’t even bother tidying away the food as the sight of it only makes my stomach churn more. Silently vowing to clean up later, I head back upstairs to take a shower.

I hope I’m not getting sick. I already took a week off for my honeymoon a few weeks ago. If I take any more time off, I’ll fall so far behind …

As I wander back upstairs and glance around, I notice the door to Dimitri’s office is slightly ajar. I frown. The door is always locked, and he’s never once shown me inside.

“Dimitri?”

Surely, if he was home, he would have heard me, so it’s likely he’s left it open by accident.

I know I shouldn’t go and snoop, but curiosity gets the better of me.

Tiptoeing down the hall, I inch the door open, gasping at what I find inside.

The wall behind the large desk is covered in photos, many of Dimitri and his brothers with an older couple who I assume to be his parents.

I glance around the rest of the room and notice that there’s even more photos in frames on top of the drinks cabinet as well as the mantelpiece above the electric fireplace.

“Dimitri Koslov, you surprise me…” I whisper as I step into the room.

Unlike the rest of the penthouse, his office is less modern and more warm and cozy, with deep, rich brown tones and antique looking furniture. It wouldn’t surprise me if perhaps it was once owned by his father.

A smile tugs at my lips as I pad across the carpet and glance at the wall of photos behind his desk. It’s filled with happy memories of Dimitri and his family at every age. I can spot Dimitri in each of them immediately by his cheeky smile and his rich brown eyes.

I laugh as I spot a picture of Dimitri holding baby Danil like a football.

I turn around and pick up the single photo frame on his desk. This time, the brothers all look much older. Danil looks to be in his mid-teens, and Dimitri has filled out, his broad shoulders looking just as delicious as they do now.

My eyes flick to his parents, my heart clenching at the sight of their smiling faces?—

“Zara?”

I whirl, the photo frame slipping from my fingers, to find Dimitri standing in the doorway.

His hair is damp and sticking to his forehead, and he’s wearing a black T-shirt and workout shorts.

“I-I thought you were out.”

“So you thought you’d go looking through my things?” His eyes narrow at me.

I stumble backward.

Gone is the soft, gentle man who held me last night as I slept, who made me feel so safe and protected.

“Get the hell out of my office.” His voice freezes the blood in my veins.

“Dimitri—”

“I said get out!” he roars.

I duck out of the office, my eyes blurring with tears as I desperately run down the hall to my room and disappear inside, making sure to lock the door behind me.

Sinking to the floor, I hug my knees to my chest as I try to stifle the sound of my sobs.

Just when I think I have Dimitri Koslov all figured out, he flips a switch and turns into someone I don’t recognize at all. Someone who doesn’t make me feel safe.

And that scares the hell out of me.