11. Nina

11

NINA

There’s another woman in the house.

From the way that Anton dressed and bolted out of the room at the sound of her voice, I felt a rising sense of panic as I considered the fact that whoever it was might not be welcome.

For a second, I wondered if this was another surprise from my father.

Cursing myself for being so paranoid, I climbed out of bed, threw on his discarded shirt from last night, and ducked out of the room.

I know I shouldn’t have eavesdropped on Anton, but I couldn’t help myself. So, I hovered around the corner at the top of the stairs.

I don’t know what I was expecting to find, but it certainly wasn’t Anton’s mother.

Why didn’t he tell me she was living here? And where has she been that I haven’t seen her yet?

And she was asking for Nikolai.

That’s a name I do recognize. When I was researching the Koslovs before I came over from Russia, I looked into Anton’s immediate family.

He lost his father almost a decade ago and there was very little information on his mother after that, which makes sense. I also know that his younger brother, Nikolai, has been almost completely absent from the Koslov Bratva. There’s hardly any trace of him, which makes me wonder why Anton’s mother was asking for him.

Has he come back?

I’m sure my father would be eager to learn of Nikolai’s whereabouts. He did consider going after him as payback for Maxim’s death as an eye for an eye has always been my father’s preferred method of revenge. But when we failed to track him down, he settled on taking out Anton instead.

Though now I’m starting to wonder if maybe it wouldn’t be better if Nikolai would materialize…

Except he told her his brother had called.

Is he lying to her? Why?

After our conversation last night about truths and lies, I know that Anton doesn’t take lying lightly, which means there must be a pretty good reason for him to be doing it to his mother if he is.

What are you hiding, Anton?

He must be trying to keep her calm, which makes me think she’s confused. Perhaps she’s ill, which could explain why she’s living with Anton.

Their voices eventually disappeared into what I assume is another set of rooms that I was unaware of, and I take that as my cue to head back into Anton’s room to wait for him.

As I climb back into bed and wrap the sheets around me, a growing sense of unease gnaws at me.

It’s clear from how he speaks to his mother that he loves her dearly. I’m not sure exactly what’s going on but from the nature of their conversation, maybe she is suffering from some sort of mental illness.

Anton’s heart must be breaking to see her like this as his family is everything to him, but he should feel some sense of peace to be able to take care of her himself.

If he was as cold and calculated as my father claims him to be, he would have just put her in a home and not thought twice about it. But I’m failing to see any evidence of that side of Anton even existing.

He could easily afford to send her to a facility, but he’s choosing to put in the time and effort to make her as comfortable as possible.

I can’t imagine my family being so selfless. If my mother had been in such a position, there’s no way Maxim would have cared for her like that, despite everything she did for us.

Anton has the sort of relationship with his family that I grew up dreaming about.

After my mother died, I lost all hope of ever feeling loved or wanted in the way that I did with her, and I’m envious of Anton in that respect. His brother might be absent, but he still has a large family to lean on when he needs to.

I, on the other hand, have no one.

The door creaks open, pulling me out of my spiraling thoughts.

“Hey.” Anton closes the door behind him, coming to perch on the edge of the bed.

He looks drained, so I reach for his hand.

“Was that your mom?”

Anton stares at our entwined fingers and nods.

“Is she sick?”

“She’s…” He rubs his calloused thumb back and forth against my fingers.

“Sorry, it’s none of my business…”

“It’s okay.” He offers me a small smile that doesn’t reach his eyes. “She has early onset Alzheimer’s.”

“Oh, Anton, I’m so sorry.” I squeeze his fingers tighter, and he looks at me with such sorrow in his dark brown eyes that my heart starts to crack. “How long ago was she diagnosed?”

“Two years. She’s only sixty-three. She had so much life left to live, but it’s like her brain and body are being pulled in opposite directions. There’s nothing physically wrong but her mind…” I can hear the emotion in his voice.

This must be incredibly tough for him, to see his mother deteriorate like this.

“I had a section of the house renovated to look like the house that we grew up in as the doctors warned me that a new environment might be too overwhelming for her to cope with. I wanted to make sure she was as comfortable as possible.”

“That’s incredibly sweet of you.”

“It’s the least I could do.”

“It’s more than most people would do.”

“I couldn’t bear the thought of putting her in a home.” He shakes his head. “She deserves better than that after everything she’s done for me.”

“And you’re giving that to her.”

“It doesn’t seem to be helping.” His shoulders slump.

I don’t stop to think before climbing into Anton’s lap and wrapping my arms around his neck.

He moves his hands on my waist and leans forward to rest his forehead against mine.

“It is. It might not always feel like it, but it’s helping her, Anton.”

“Half the time, she barely knows who I am, and it’s heartbreaking.”

My eyes sting with tears.

He shuts his eyes. “I feel selfish even saying that out loud.”

“You’re allowed to hurt.”

He shakes his head. “My pain is nothing compared to hers.”

“Anton,” I whisper, taking his face in my hands. “I hope you know how amazing you are. I don’t know a single person who would go to such lengths to care for their loved ones.”

“It’s really not a big deal.” He shrugs. “She’s my mother. I would do anything for her.”

The more I learn about Anton, the more I realize that whatever it is that my father has planned for him, he doesn’t deserve it.

He’s the most kind and selfless person I’ve ever met and whatever it is that happened between him and Maxim must have been justified.

I’ll do whatever I can to prove it, if only to convince my father to call off this vendetta before it’s too late.

“She’s lucky to have you as a son,” I whisper before leaning in and pressing a kiss to the corner of his mouth.

His shoulders relax at my touch, so I continue to pepper kisses along his stubbled jaw. “You’re one of a kind, Anton Koslov.”

“So are you, Nina Balakin.” He moves his hands to rub them up and down my thighs.

My skin pebbles beneath his touch, and I’m suddenly very aware of the fact that I’m not wearing any panties.

Last night with him was incredible, and we didn’t even have sex. Exploring each other with our tongues and mouths felt incredibly intimate, and I don’t think I’ve ever felt such intense pleasure in my life.

Though the dull ache between my thighs serves as a reminder of what I missed out on.

Maybe it will be the perfect distraction for Anton, to get him out of his head for a while…

“Anyway, enough about me. What about you?” He snaps me out of my lust-induced daydream.

“What about me?”

“Are you close with your family?”

I can’t stop the nervous laughter from spilling from my lips.

“That’s the last thing I would describe my family as.”

“Oh, I’m sorry.” Anton’s brow furrows as he looks at me, and I have to look away.

The last thing I deserve is his sympathy.

“It’s really no big deal. I mean, when my mother was alive, we were inseparable. I was her mini-me in every sense, and that’s something that can’t be taken away from me.”

“Did she dance too?”

“She studied ballet a little as a child, but it was always more about the music with her. She played the piano beautifully, and I would always dance around it as she played.” I smile at the memory. “We always joked that one day when I was grown up, we would tour the world as a mother-daughter duo.”

“She would be so proud of you.” Anton leans forward to rub his nose against mine.

“I’m not a professional dancer yet. I still have a long way to go.”

“But you’re putting in the work to make that dream a reality, Nina. Not many would have the courage to do that.”

My cheeks burn at the compliment.

“We’ll see what happens…” I mutter, ignoring the pang of guilt in my stomach.

If I can’t get my growing feelings for Anton under control, my father is going to ruin a lot more than just my dance career.

“What about the rest of your family? Do you have siblings or cousins?”

“I don’t.” It’s not a complete lie. After all Maxim is dead, and Lev is…well, Lev. “I am jealous of your cousins, though. It must be nice to have a big family, and all those babies to snuggle.”

Anton chuckles. “Don’t be fooled by the cuteness.”

“I’d say your cousins are more handsome than cute, but sure, I guess they’re sort of cute.”

“I meant, the babies.” He pinches my waist, and I squeal.

There’s a twinkle of amusement in his eyes, and I know that the dark cloud is starting to pass.

“So jealous.” I chuckle.

“Well, I can’t be too jealous, seeing as you’re wearing my shirt. Which, by the way, you look sexy as hell in.” He sinks his fingers into my hips as he bends down to press a kiss to my neck.

I shiver at his touch, arching my back as my nipples pebble against the soft material.

“Oh, this old thing?” I gasp as his tongue licks along my jaw.

My pussy starts to throb as I remember how it felt to have that tongue between my thighs.

“Mmm, I think I might have to donate all my shirts to you. You wear them much better.”

“Oh, I don’t know about that.” I run my hands over his broad shoulders. “You’re pretty sexy yourself.”

Anton’s breath tickles my neck as he laughs.

“ Lapochka , there’s no competition when it comes to you.”