Chapter Five

A delicious smell wafted over Charon, pulling him from sleep. The bed still rocked, but he was alone. Charon peered over the edge of the suspended mattress. Several platters of food covered the dining room table. Before Charon completely shook away sleep, something banged against the wooden underside of the bed.

“Time to get up, Sleeping Beauty. Dinner is ready. All the family eats together on Thanksgiving.”

Charon blinked several times. He hadn’t realized it was Thanksgiving. Charon never thought about holidays. Thanksgiving wasn’t a holiday in Greece. Not to mention, he had gotten no type of celebration as a child. That continued into adulthood. It all seemed very pointless when someone had no one.

It surprised Charon when Snow passed from beneath the bed, revealing himself as the person who demanded his presence. Charon easily jumped from the bed and landed lightly on his toes. Paine had been chosen by the academy because of his amazing parkour abilities. He could quickly and silently move easily between any vertical surfaces. It was a skill he had taught to Charon on the sly.

Uncomfortable and unsure of what to do, Charon took a seat at the table. Before he could scoot closer, Paine crawled into his lap and sat. Charon hid a smile as he kissed Paine’s shoulder. Each time Paine let him closer, Charon felt hope grow another inch.

The surrounding chairs slowly filled until the enormous table had no space left. Charon hadn’t realized how many people lived here. At the head of the table, Quentin sat with Snow next to him in a chair squeezed in beside him. They made Charon curious. He didn’t know if they were a couple or if Snow was Quentin’s personal caretaker. For whatever reason, he wanted to know. Everything about them seemed odd. Quentin had dark hair, graying at the edges and showing his nearly forty years. Snow was likely anywhere from twenty-nine to thirty-five, but—despite his solid white hair—he was definitely younger than Quentin. There was something about their posture, though. They sat leaned each other’s way. If nothing else, they were friends and trusted each other. This entire household was odd as fuck to him. Charon wanted to believe these people could be trusted. He just wasn’t so sure that was true.

Quentin waited until everyone had a glass of wine in front of them before he raised his glass. “To another year of thankfulness. This found family is the best thing to ever happen to me. May we all have another year together.”

A round of hear, hear rang out around the table. Everyone took a drink and then started filling their plates. Thankfully, Paine put food on both their plates, since Charon felt out of place. He had always been a chameleon, fitting in to every situation with ease, but he didn’t know how to fake being a family. Charon had never had one of those. His shoulders eased the longer he stayed. Paine’s obvious comfort helped. He kept feeding Charon until Charon finally willingly joined in. Everything was delicious. He had never had a Thanksgiving dinner. Each food complemented each other. In no time, he was ready to burst at the seams. Paine pushed his plate away and snuggled deeper into Charon’s hold. A warmth started in his chest and spread. He didn’t deserve the affection Paine showed him. Charon knew it could end any moment. Oddly, Charon didn’t want anything about the night to end. He hadn’t known family felt like this.

Finally, Snow stood and backed Quentin away from the table. “You know what time it is,” he said, heading for the front sitting room. Charon didn’t know what time it was, but when Paine slipped from his lap, he followed. Plastic storage totes sat piled around the room. The front door opened, and two men brought a tree inside. As they stood the tree beside the fireplace, Charon realized it was a Christmas tree. People began opening totes and pulling out decorations. Paine looked his way. His eyes were alight with mischief. Charon had to know.

He leaned in close. “What is that devious look about?”

Paine touched his lips to Charon’s ear. “When everyone goes to bed, I’ll bat off all the bottom half of the tree’s ornaments.”

A smile exploded across Charon’s lips. He saw the appeal in the life Paine had chosen. He could create innocent carnage with no repercussions. Each time he wasn’t punished, trust built. Paine likely needed all of that he could get.

Charon wished he felt the same. His gaze slid Snow’s way. He found the guy watching them. His gaze slid between Paine and Charon, as if they were a puzzle he tried to solve. Charon decided to let it go. Paine seemed to be having a lucid moment. He didn’t want to miss a second with him.

Halfway through decorating the tree, Paine’s social battery died. Without explanations, he bounced from wall to wall, scaling his way into the privacy of the rafters. He looked back in time to see the disappointment on Charon’s face. Paine settled down and watched him from above. Charon looked awkward once he was alone with the rest of the household. Paine rubbed his chest. He didn’t know how to feel.

After the botched attempt to kidnap him, the rest of the day with Charon had felt so normal. He had felt like himself for a little while. Then the large number of people had closed in on him until he couldn’t breathe. Even with Charon protecting his back, Paine had needed to quickly part the situation before he lashed out and ruined the night.

At dinner, Charon seemed sad. Paine understood. Nights like tonight were a stark reminder of everything they had never had before Quentin. When Paine had first arrived, he had thought he knew exactly why Quentin did these things. It was a way to manipulate them to stay. But it hadn’t taken Paine much silent observation to realize they were all Quentin had. No family came to sit with him. His illness kept him trapped without help. He was a force of nature, but his body kept him still. Paine understood that feeling. He had spent years in a cage. That was why nights like tonight drained him so much. The claustrophobia was too much.

Charon visibly hung back from the crowd and made his escape the first chance he got. People noticed, but everyone here understood. Every single one of them had experienced the same firsts. It was nearly impossible for people such as them to trust this much kindness. But Paine had been here for more years than he spent in hell, and he honestly didn’t think anyone could fake it for this long. For reasons all his own, Quentin loved them.

Paine quietly stalked Charon. Inside his room, Charon slowly stripped. He dropped a knife he kept hidden on the nightstand before circling the bed and peeling off his shirt. Once nude, he sat on the edge of the bed and stared at nothing. Paine wondered if he too tried recharging his battery.

He waited until the count of ten and lightly dropped from the rafters behind him. Paine grabbed the knife. He knew he cast a shadow on the wall and Charon knew he was coming. Still, Charon didn’t move, even when the knife showed in his shadow. Paine eased onto the bed and pounced. He placed the knife against Charon’s throat. Even Paine didn’t know why he did certain things sometimes. He just needed to test Charon. Paine had to know if Charon would hurt him.

Unfortunately, once Paine had the knife against Charon’s skin, something ugly rose inside him. His throat swelled. Terrible memories washed over him. His chest hurt. He wasn’t beautiful anymore.

“You don’t want me anymore. I’m ugly now.”

Charon snagged his wrist and turned, keeping Paine from cutting him. His eyes burned with passion. “You could never be ugly.” Charon grabbed the knife and tossed it aside. “There will never come a day when I don’t want you.” Charon kept moving until he had Paine on his back and his huge body covered Paine’s. There was no missing the erection between them. His hand shook as he swept it through Paine’s hair. Charon’s gaze moved over Paine’s face before meeting Paine’s stare. “I love you. That has nothing to do with looks, but you’re still the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen.” He kissed the corner of Paine’s mouth. “Tell me you still love me. I need to know you don’t hate me.” He kissed the other corner of Paine’s mouth. “I hate myself enough for the both of us.”

Paine”s chest tried to cave. His entire body heaved as he tried sucking in a breath. “You should’ve killed me.”

Charon shook his head. His eyes filled with tears. “That’s the one thing I could never do. I knew it would be better for you if you died. But I was selfish and couldn’t do it. I couldn’t watch the light leave your eyes.” A tear dropped from Charon’s eye and landed on Paine’s cheek. “Instead, I watched your love for me die.”

Paine began to shake. He shook so hard, he nearly gave himself motion sickness. “No. You watched me accept I had to die to save you. I had to set you free.”

Charon sniffed. “Living without you isn’t freedom. It’s just a different hell.”

“I can’t leave here with you.” Paine loved Charon. He would until he drew his final breath, but he wasn’t the same. He wasn’t sane. Paine couldn’t function in reality any longer.

Charon slowly lowered his head, giving Paine time to say no. “Then I’ll stay here with you until you tell me to go. I love you too much to walk away.”

Their lips met. Paine drew a ragged breath. He let Charon in and their tongues played. Paine could barely breathe through the emotions choking him. His body burned. No one had ever even tried to make him feel the way Charon did. Paine missed the surge of love and the hope Charon gave him. He wanted to know those feelings again.

Paine turned his head. Charon kissed his neck. Paine panted for breath. “Do you remember the way you used to make love to me on that hard concrete floor where no one could hear? Do it again.”

Charon didn’t question him. He simply went to work, peeling away Paine’s clothes. Paine wasn’t afraid. He needed to remember what it was like to feel normal. To be set free. The moment Charon had Paine nude, his body collided with Paine’s. Paine gasped at the sensation of skin on skin. He had forgotten how powerful and beautiful Charon made him feel. Their fingers linked as their mouths clashed. Charon’s body moved against his, causing friction between them that made Paine moan. With Charon, there was no pain. He made love to Paine in a way that only brought pleasure. Paine was desperate for the human connection. He couldn’t help the sounds he made. Paine fully recalled how hard it had been to stay silent on the floor of that cage. Charon couldn’t stop kissing him so he could swallow the sounds Paine made. Even the fear of getting caught hadn’t stopped the ecstasy Charon’s body created.

They didn’t rush. Charon rocked against him while they explored each other’s mouths. Nothing had changed. That thought brought tears to Paine’s eyes. All the years had passed and not an ounce of love had died. They were a love born in the darkness. Just like them, it refused to die. The pressure built. Paine turned restless. He needed the pleasure Charon’s body promised. Charon tore his mouth away and pressed his forehead against Paine’s shoulder. He buried his hand beneath Paine and grabbed a handful of ass. Charon held him in place and rocked into him, keeping up a steady pace that had Paine straining toward release. Rapid-sounding pants burst from Paine. He struggled toward the edge. Then bliss washed over him and stole a cry from his lips. His body jerked as cum filled the space between them. Charon buried his face against Paine’s neck and cried out against his skin, muffling the sound. Tears leaked from the corners of Paine’s eyes and rolled back into his hair. For a moment, he felt human, and it terrified him.