Chapter 44

CHAPTER 44

“ V ampires don’t have mates,” Jill said hollowly.

“No, they don’t,” Logan murmured softly as she made her way around the chair to face the man that really needed to start talking.

“I’m going to need you to say something that makes sense now,” Jill said as she faced him.

“I claimed you the first time that I bit you.”

“You marked me as a minion,” Jill said as she thought about the moment when his fangs slid into her neck and-

“No, I claimed you, Angel,” Logan said, still not making any sense.

“How?” she asked, needing to know.

“I honestly have no fucking idea, but it’s the reason why your transition took so long and why I can drink your blood. It’s also the reason why we can feel each other’s emotions, pleasure, and pain. We’re connected,” Logan explained as she slowly nodded while she thought about everything that he told her about her transition, the changes, and everything that never made sense.

Until now.

“Did you know that you would feel my pain when you poured holy water on my arm to save it?” she asked, noting the way that he went still.

“Yes,” Logan admitted, making her swallow hard as she thought about the moment when she realized that something was wrong.

Within seconds of the white smoke pouring off her skin, her fingertips and palm turned gray before turning to ash and fell away as the pain slowly made its way up her arm.

God, the pain was indescribable…

It had taken everything she had not to scream, afraid that once she started that she wouldn’t be able to stop. As soon as she found out that they’d used holy oil and Sentinel blood on the bars, she knew that she was about to lose her arm forever. If she’d lost her arm any other way, holy water, sunlight, even having it sliced off, it would have grown back after she’d gorged on bagged blood, but the combination of holy oil and Sentinel blood was a deal breaker. Thanks to Logan, her arm was able to grow back because he’d cut off the destruction before it could reach her shoulder.

“Why did you let me drink your blood?” Jill asked, watching him closely.

“I wanted the connection to go both ways,” he said as she dropped down in the chair across from him.

“Why did you do this?” she asked on a soft sigh.

“Because I wanted you to know what you were doing to me.”

“And what am I doing to you?” Jill asked as she sat there, considering him.

“Destroying me.”

“Did you do this on purpose?” Jill asked after a slight hesitation.

“Are you asking if I knew that I was claiming you the first time that I bit you?” Logan asked, shifting to get more comfortable.

“Yes,” Jill said, needing to know.

“No,” he murmured softly.

“And if you could do it all over again?” she asked.

“I would have done it the first time that I saw you,” Logan said with absolutely no hesitation.

“I see,” Jill murmured absently as she considered her options. “What have you learned about me from this connection?”

“That you don’t hate me.”

“What else?”

“That you love the children more than anything and that you miss your family,” Logan said.

“Yes, I do,” Jill said, wishing that she could see them, but she knew that it wasn’t safe.

“And when I’m not here, you feel like a part of you is missing,” Logan said, making her frown.

“You can tell all that from my blood?” Jill asked, leaning back in her chair as she watched him.

“No.”

“Then, how?”

“Because that’s how I feel,” Logan said, leaving her with no choice but to worry her bottom lip between her teeth as she thought that over.

“What am I feeling right now?” Jill asked as she absently drummed her fingertips against the armrest.

“I don’t know.”

“And how does that make you feel?” Jill asked as she felt a shimmer of fear spread through her chest, something that would have freaked her out an hour ago.

“Terrified.”

“Of…” Jill said, letting the word trail off.

“Of losing you,” Logan admitted.

“Fair enough,” Jill absently murmured as she glanced back at the tray she’d placed on the bed, curious about this connection.

Deciding that it was now or never, Jill released a heartfelt sigh as she stood up and made her way to the bed and grabbed the tray.

“What are you doing?” Logan asked as she made her way back to him.

“Finding out how strong this connection is,” Jill said, placing the tray on the coffee table before she glanced back at him. “What am I feeling now?”

“I don’t know,” Logan admitted.

“Can you see me?” Jill asked as her gaze flickered to the tie wrapped around his head.

“No.”

Nodding slowly, Jill pinched her arm as she watched him. “Did you feel that?”

“Yes, there was a pinch on my right arm.”

She turned around and picked up the paperclip she’d placed on the tray and took her time pulling it open before she pressed the end against her fingertip. Without waiting to be asked, Logan said, “Middle finger on my left hand.”

“Very good,” Jill murmured as she reached for the bowl of ice only to grab the matchbook instead. Keeping her eyes locked on Logan, she pulled a match free and lit it before raising her palm over it and-

Watched Logan hiss as he clenched his left hand shut. “Left hand,” Logan said as her gaze flickered back to the bowl of ice.

“What am I feeling now?” Jill asked, picking up the bowl of ice as she made her way over to him before placing it on the small table next to him.

Swallowing hard, Logan said, “I don’t know.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Jill asked as she released a shaky breath while she thought about everything that happened.

“Because I’m an asshole.”

“I already knew that,” Jill murmured, watching his lips twitch as she climbed onto his lap.

“I wanted more,” he admitted.

“I see,” Jill said as she unbuttoned his shirt before pulling it free from his pants.

“Did you change as much as I did after your transition?” Jill asked as she ran her fingertips over his chest.

“No,” Logan said as she watched the muscles in his chest and abs flex beneath her touch while she ran her fingertips over his navel and felt the first tendrils of excitement reach her.

She allowed herself one last gentle brush of her fingertips along his skin before she reached for an ice cube. Watching him, Jill pressed the ice cube against his chest only to release a soft hiss when she felt the cold sensation against her chest.

When she ran the ice cube down his chest, she felt the move mimicked on her skin. She watched several drops of water race down his stomach ahead of the ice cube and realized that she couldn’t feel them. She could only feel the ice cube as she slowly ran it down his torso.

Curious, Jill dropped the ice cube back in the bowl and gently cupped his handsome face in her hands, noting that she couldn’t feel her touch, but she could feel the sensation of pleasure spreading along her jaw. Swallowing hard, Jill reached for his blindfold and pulled it free, letting it slip from her fingertips and fall to the floor as she looked into warm silver eyes that she’d once thought were cold. Keeping her eyes locked with his, Jill reached for the ties securing his wrists to the chair and pulled them free.

As soon as his arms were free, Jill was cupping his face in her hands again. She gently caressed his face with her thumbs, wondering what it was about this man that made her feel this way, like for the first time in her life, she was exactly where she was supposed to be and that absolutely terrified her.

“What are you doing to me, Logan?” Jill whispered.

“Letting you go.”