Chapter 12

12

ALLIE

D eepest blackness. Everything aches. My head throbs, and my limbs feel brittle.

The cocoon of pain.

It’s something I know all too well, dammit.

My body is lifted. For a few seconds everything is rising, then falling again. Shit, did I pass out and fall? You know what, I don’t even care. It’s dark and relatively quiet here.

Through the murky haze of my spasming brain, I hear a low murmur. “Allie. I’m here, angel. I’ve got you. You’re going to be okay.”

Damon’s here? I thought he was gone…to…I forget. Something important. A slow wave of relief fills me. It feels good to be near Damon.

The air is chilly. Oh…so nice. My body instinctively burrows into the warmth under me. It reminds me of when Damon and I were cuddling.

Oh! I think it really is Damon. Mmm… He smells so good…

“That’s it, baby. Just relax and sleep. Let it all go.”

I can’t open my mouth to speak. Can’t open my eyes. My hand finds his shoulder, squeezing gently, then I drift off for a minute…just two more minutes to rest…

My shoulder is chilly, yet my side is warm. My feet are against something even warmer…rubber, maybe, or plastic. Weird.

“I think I’ve loved you from the moment you sent me those extra pickles.”

As I gradually rise to the surface of consciousness, I become aware of a soft murmur near my ear, barely a breath. “I’ve got you, Allie. I love you, sweetheart. It’s okay, sleep as long as you like.”

Damon. Damon is here with me.

The last bit of cold, steely tension unravels from around my skull and dissolves.

“Hey.” The word is mumbled, but Damon’s eyes fly wide open as I blink up at him.

“Baby.” His lips brush my forehead. “Are you feeling a little better?”

Slowly I become more aware and look around. I’m lying on top of Damon on an easy chair in an office. The only light is coming in through cracks around the edges of the curtains. It seems like the bright washy glow of streetlights.

“What time is it?” I croak.

“Juice.” Damon tips me up cautiously, and I sip from the bottle he holds out for me. “It’s nearly three in the morning. We thought you’d be out all night.”

“We…?” Right. I vaguely recall two other men. A police officer helped me get here… Oh – we’re in a medical office of some kind. Yes, there was a man trying to take my medical history. I think I heard him call my doctor at one point.

“Are we allowed to be here?”

Damon brushes my hair back and settles me against him again. “Jonah gave me the spare key. You refused to go to the hospital, and we didn’t want to move you.”

A wisp of cool air skims across my shoulder, and I snuggle into Damon’s warmth. “Mmm, this is the right kind of heat.” My head lifts slightly. “Wait. Why is it so cold in here?”

He chuckles deeply. “You were so tense. It looked like your body was made of glass and you were terrified to move. Nobody could sleep like that. I tried to think of when you looked the most comfortable and remembered when we were snuggling in my chilly basement. So we cranked the air conditioning, put a hot water bottle on your feet, and laid you on top of me.”

“Wow.” The fog is clearing now and I’m able to keep my eyes open, focusing in the dim light. “You stayed with me?”

“Of course, baby. You finally fell asleep. Real sleep.” He strokes my back and shoulder gently. “When you’re ready, I’ll take you home. Jonah gave me lists of tricks that can help. Some might be new to you. And once you have another good sleep, a shower will help drain the tension.”

I relax against Damon’s chest, and his fingers brush against the base of my skull. His fingernails dig in slightly, massaging my scalp. Wow – it always feels good when he touches me. But this mix of tenderness and perfect care… It’s amazing.

“I think you were doing that a few hours ago,” I whisper. “I couldn’t tell you at the time, but it really helped.”

“It was one of the things that helped you unclench enough to sleep.” The relief in his voice is crystal clear. “How about you sleep again for a bit?”

“Is that okay? That would be great.”

His lips brush the top of my hair and his fingers dance along my scalp, loosening the last knots of tension. “Anything for you, my angel.”

I drift off again, this time from exhaustion instead of pain. Just as I’m nearly under, a tiny fragment of a memory pops up, wafting through my mind like a soft pink glow instead of the hellacious orange triangles.

I can’t trust anything I experience when I’m in this state.

But…

I think Damon said that he loves me.