28. The Calm Before

CHAPTER 28

The Calm Before

CALEB

S hit. I should've known better. Should've realized he was still dealing with trauma.

I glanced over at him as I drove, trying to keep my eyes on the road while also checking on him. He was staring out the window, his jaw clenched tight, that faraway look still in his eyes.

"Hey," I said softly, not wanting to startle him. "You with me, Liam?"

He blinked, turning to look at me. "Yeah," he mumbled, but I could tell he wasn't really there.

I took a deep breath, weighing my options. I'd never been great at the whole comforting thing - preferred to deal with my own shit alone, you know? But this was Liam. And for him, I'd try anything.

Slowly, carefully, I reached out and placed my hand on top of his. For a second, I felt him start to pull away, and my heart sank. But then, to my surprise, he grabbed onto my hand like it was a lifeline.

"I'm sorry," I said, keeping my voice low and steady. "I didn't think and I should've been more careful."

Liam shook his head, his grip on my hand tightening. "Not your fault," he said, his voice rough. "I thought I was ready. Guess I was wrong."

I snorted, trying to lighten the mood. "Yeah, well, we can't all be perfect like me, you know?"

It worked - sort of. Liam's lips twitched in what might have been the ghost of a smile. "Asshole," he muttered, but there was no heat in it.

We drove in silence for a while, my hand still wrapped around his. I wasn't used to this - this closeness, this vulnerability. Usually, I kept people at arm's length these days. It was safer that way. Can't get hurt if you don't let anyone in.

"You wanna talk about it?" I asked finally, breaking the silence.

Liam sighed, his thumb absently tracing patterns on the back of my hand. "Not really," he admitted. "But maybe I should?"

I shrugged, trying to keep it casual even as my heart raced. "Up to you, man. No pressure. But I'm here if you want to unload."

He was quiet for a long moment, and I started to think he wasn't going to say anything.

"It was like I was back there," Liam said softly. "At the prom. I could see it all - the decorations, the people, Jake's face when he outed us."

I felt a surge of anger once Liam mentioned those things. It sounded so raw and felt like it was just yesterday.

"And then I was running," Liam continued, his voice shaking slightly. "And I could hear the car coming, could feel the impact… God, Caleb, it was so real."

I squeezed his hand, wishing I could do more. Wishing I could take away all his pain, all his fear. "It's over now," I said, knowing it wasn't enough but not knowing what else to say. "You're safe. I've got you."

Liam laughed, but it was a bitter sound. "Safe? In this town? Come on, Caleb. You know better than that. "

I frowned, pulling the truck over to the side of the road. This conversation needed my full attention.

"Hey," I said, turning to face him fully. "Look at me."

Liam met my eyes reluctantly, and I could see the pain, the fear, the anger swirling in those blue depths.

"This town?" I said, gesturing around us. "It's changed. We've changed. What happened to us it was fucked up. No doubt about it. But we're not those scared kids anymore, Liam. We're grown-ass men. And if anyone tries to give us shit, they'll have to deal with me. Got it?"

Liam stared at me for a long moment, his expression unreadable. Then, slowly, a real smile spread across his face. "Look at you, all protective and shit," he teased.

I rolled my eyes, but I was grinning too. "He met this stubborn asshole who wouldn't leave him alone. Kinda grew on him, I guess."

Liam laughed, and this time it sounded genuine. "Yeah, well. The feeling's mutual."

We sat there for a moment, just looking at each other. And I felt something shift between us - something warm and familiar and scary as hell.

I went back to driving and my heart was doing this weird flutter thing, caught between excitement and anxiety. This was our first time here together, and I wasn't sure how this was gonna go down.

"We're here," I announced, trying to keep my voice casual. No need to make this a bigger deal than it already was.

Liam nodded, his face still a bit pale. He was putting on a brave front, but I could see the tension in his shoulders, the way his fingers were fidgeting with the hem of his shirt.

"You good?" I asked, not wanting to push but needing to make sure.

He took a deep breath, then gave me a small smile. "Yeah, I'm good. Let's do this."

I hopped out of the truck, circling around to open Liam's door. He raised an eyebrow at me, a hint of amusement in his eyes.

"What a gentleman," he teased, climbing out.

I shrugged, feeling my cheeks heat up a bit. "Shut up. My mom raised me right, that's all."

We climbed out of the truck, and this time, I didn't hesitate to take Liam's hand. His fingers intertwined with mine, warm and solid and real.

As we approached the entrance, I could feel the weight of curious stares. Small town gossip was about to go into overdrive, but I found I didn't care. Let them talk.

Sarah's eyes nearly bugged out of her head when she saw us walk in hand-in-hand. "Well, I'll be," she said, a slow grin spreading across her face. "Caleb Winchester and Liam Denison on a date. Never thought I'd see the day."

I felt Liam tense beside me, but I squeezed his hand reassuringly. "Table for two, Sarah?" I asked, my tone making it clear this wasn't up for discussion.

She caught the hint and nodded, leading us to a cozy booth by the window. "Enjoy, boys," she said with a wink, handing us our menus.

As soon as she was gone, Liam let out a breath. "Well, that's the whole town informed, I guess."

I shrugged, reaching across the table to take his hand again. "Let ‘em talk. I'm just happy to be here with you."

Liam's eyes softened, a smile tugging at his lips. "Yeah, me too."

We fell into easy conversation as we looked over the menu, debating the merits of various dishes and teasing each other about our choices. It felt good, natural, like we'd been doing this for years instead of decades apart.

When Sarah came back to take our order, I couldn't help but notice the knowing gleam in her eye. "So, what'll it be for the lovebirds?"

I felt my cheeks heat up, but Liam just grinned. "I'll have the bacon cheeseburger, extra pickles," he said. "And this guy will have the same, but hold the onions. He's hoping for a goodnight kiss."

Now I was definitely blushing. "Liam!" I hissed, but I couldn't keep the smile off my face.

Sarah laughed, jotting down our order. "Coming right up. And don't worry, Caleb. Your secret's safe with me."

As she walked away, I shook my head at Liam. "You're trouble, you know that?"

He winked, his foot nudging mine under the table. "Yeah, but you like it."

And damn if he wasn't right. I couldn't help the grin that spread across my face, even as I tried to play it cool.

But I couldn't shake the image of Liam's face when we passed the high school earlier. That haunted look, the way he'd seemed to retreat into himself it was gnawing at me.

The food arrived not long after that giving us some time think.

"That back there…" I started, then hesitated, not sure how to phrase it without sounding like an ass. "Does it happen often?"

Liam looked up from his plate, his fork pausing halfway to his mouth. For a moment, I thought he might brush it off, change the subject. But then he set the fork down, his eyes meeting mine with a seriousness that made my heart clench.

"Not lately, no," he said, his voice quiet but steady. "It was hard, after what happened that night. I had nightmares for a couple of years. My therapist told me I was suffering from PTSD."

PTSD. The words hit me like a punch to the gut. I'd known it was bad, known that night had fucked us both up in ways we were still dealing with. But hearing it laid out like that, so clinical and matter-of-fact… it made it real in a way I wasn't prepared for.

"Jesus, Liam," I breathed, feeling like the world's biggest asshole. "I'm so sorry."

The guilt was a living thing, clawing at my insides .

He reached across the table and took my hand, his fingers warm and solid against mine.

. "I've already made my peace with it. I'm not going to lie to you, it hurt. A lot. But we're here now, creating new memories, yeah?" He said, his voice gentle but firm

I stared at our joined hands, feeling a lump form in my throat. "Yeah," I managed to croak out. "New memories."

Liam squeezed my hand, and when I looked up, there was a softness in his eyes that made my heart skip a beat. "Look, Caleb. As much as it was hard for me to process, what happened it wasn't your fault, I know that now. It wasn't anyone's fault, except maybe those assholes who thought it was okay to out us like that."

I nodded, but I couldn't quite shake the feeling of responsibility. "I know. Logically, I know that. But I can't help thinking if I'd been there when you woke up in the hospital, if I'd found a way to contact you after your parents shipped you off…"

"Then what?" Liam interrupted, his voice gentle but firm. "You think that would have magically fixed everything? That it would have erased the trauma, made the nightmares go away?"

I shrugged, feeling suddenly very small. "I don't know. Maybe?"

Liam sighed, but there was a fondness in his expression that eased some of the tightness in my chest. "Caleb, you can't change the past. Neither of us can. All we can do is move forward, deal with our shit, and try to be better."

I nodded, feeling a rush of gratitude for this man who'd somehow found it in himself to forgive me, even when I couldn't forgive myself. "When did you get so wise, huh?" I teased, trying to lighten the mood.

He grinned, a hint of his old mischief sparking in his eyes. "Must be all that city living. Really broadens the mind, you know."

I snorted, rolling my eyes. "Yeah, right. I bet it's all those fancy lattes and avocado toasts. Turned you into a real philosopher. "

We both laughed, and I felt some of the tension ease out of my shoulders. This was good. This was us. Bantering and teasing, but with an undercurrent of understanding that went bone-deep.

But there was still something nagging at me, a question I needed to ask even though I was afraid of the answer. "Liam," I said, my voice more serious now. "Are you… I mean, do you still have trouble with it? The PTSD?"

He was quiet for a moment, his thumb tracing absent patterns on the back of my hand. "Sometimes," he admitted finally. "It's not as bad as it used to be. Therapy helped a lot, and so did my music. But there are still days when something will trigger a memory, and it's like I'm right back there."

I nodded, thinking about how he'd reacted when we passed the high school. "Like today?"

"Yeah," he said softly. "Like today. But hey," he added, his voice brightening a little, "I got through it, right? And having you there helped. More than you know."

I felt a warmth spread through my chest at his words. "I'm glad," I said, meaning it with every fiber of my being. "And I want you to know that I'm here, okay? Whatever you need, whenever you need it. You don't have to go through this alone anymore."

Liam's eyes widened slightly, like he was surprised by the intensity of my words. Then a slow smile spread across his face, soft and genuine in a way that made my heart ache. "Thanks, Caleb. That means a lot."

We sat there for a moment, just looking at each other, our hands still joined on the table. And I felt something shift between us, something warm and familiar and scary as hell.

Before I could figure out what to do with that feeling, Sarah appeared at our table, a knowing smile on her face. "So, boys," she said, her eyes twinkling, "how about some dessert? On the house, of course. It's not every day we get a reunion like this."

I glanced at Liam, raising an eyebrow in question. He nodded, a small smile playing at his lips.

"Sure, Sarah," I said. "Two slices of apple pie, if you've got it. "

"Coming right up," she said with a wink, bustling off to the kitchen.

As Sarah disappeared, Liam leaned forward, his expression turning serious. "Hank mentioned something about the ranch facing some issues. He didn't give me much detail, but I got the sense it was pretty serious. What's going on?"

I felt my stomach drop. Of course Hank would've said something. The old coot never could keep his mouth shut. I sighed, running a hand through my hair. "Yeah, it's not great."

Liam's eyes softened with concern. "Talk to me. What happened?"

I took a deep breath, steeling myself. "It's my dad. He, took out a loan while my mom was in the hospital getting chemo for her cancer. Used the ranch as collateral."

"Shit," Liam breathed, his eyes widening.

I shrugged, trying to play it off like it wasn't eating me up inside. "Yeah, well. He thought he was doing the right thing at the time. Problem is, he forgot to tell us about it until the bank came knocking on our door."

Liam reached across the table, squeezing my hand. The warmth of his touch sent a jolt through me, grounding me in a way I hadn't expected. "How bad is it?" he asked softly.

I let out a humorless laugh. "Bad enough that we might lose the ranch if we can't come up with the money soon."

"Jesus," Liam muttered. Then, after a pause, "How's your mom doing now? Is she… I mean, is she okay?"

I felt a rush of warmth at his concern. Same old Liam, always thinking of others. "She's doing better now, thanks. The treatments were rough, but she's a fighter. Actually," I added, a small smile tugging at my lips, "I think she'd love to see you. She always had a soft spot for you, you know."

Liam smiled at that, and damn if it didn't make my heart skip a beat. It was that smile, the one that used to be just for me. The one that made his eyes crinkle at the corners and lit up his whole face .

"I'd like that," he said softly. "To see her, I mean."

I nodded, feeling a mix of excitement and nervousness at the thought of Liam back at the ranch, talking with my mom like old times. "Yeah, of course. She'd love it."

We fell silent for a moment, both lost in thought. Then Liam's eyes lit up, that spark of excitement I remembered so well dancing in their depths. "Hey, what about a fundraiser?"

I blinked, caught off guard by the sudden shift. "A fundraiser?"

"Yeah!" Liam said, leaning forward. "Like, a fair or something. In the barn. We could have games, food, maybe even a little concert. Get the whole town involved."

I mulled it over, the idea taking root in my mind. It wasn't half bad, actually. "Huh. That could work. We've got the space for it, and I bet a lot of folks around here would be willing to chip in."

Liam grinned, clearly warming to the idea. "Exactly! And I could help out with the music side of things. Maybe even get some of my industry connections to donate some cool prizes for a raffle or something."

I felt a smile spreading across my face, Liam's enthusiasm infectious. "You'd do that? I mean, you don't have to…"

He cut me off with a wave of his hand. "Of course I would."

Sarah returned with our pie. "Here you go, boys," she said, setting the plates down. "Enjoy!"

We dug in, the conversation turning to lighter topics as we savored the sweet, tangy flavor of the apple pie. It was good, really good. Just like I remembered.

As we were finishing up, I heard a voice from the booth behind us. "…looking for Corey King. Someone said they saw him in Oakwood Grove."

I felt Liam tense beside me, his fork clattering against the plate. When I looked up, his face had gone pale, his eyes wide with what looked like panic.

"Liam?" I said, concern coloring my voice. "You okay? "

He shook his head, already starting to slide out of the booth. "I… I'm not feeling so great. Think I might need to head home."

I frowned, thrown by the sudden change. "What? But we were just… are you sure you're okay?"

Liam nodded, not meeting my eyes. "Yeah, yeah. Just… maybe something didn't agree with me. Mind if we call it a day?"

I wanted to press, to figure out what had spooked him so badly. Whatever was going on, it was serious. But I didn't want to pry.

"Of course," I said, sliding out of the booth myself. "Let's get you home."

I threw some cash on the table, probably way too much, but I couldn't bring myself to care. All my focus was on Liam, on the way his hands were shaking slightly as he pulled on his jacket.

As we headed for the door, I heard that voice again. "…swear I saw him. Corey King, right here in Oakwood. Can you believe it?"